back to article BT Openreach prepares to declare UK MBORCed* as all new phone line installations halted over coronavirus

BT is to halt all home visits by its Openreach broadband engineers except for essential ones needed to keep critical businesses and vulnerable people connected to the outside world. As a direct result of the coronavirus outbreak, BT Openreach is refusing to accept new connection requests until 1 June 2020, though it will try …

  1. Warm Braw Silver badge

    Possible to provide one by any other means

    We're all going to have a lot of empty tins in the near future. Does this means the shops will be besieged by people buying string?

    1. Scott Broukell

      Re: Possible to provide one by any other means

      Indeed so and as a consequence, welcome one and all, to the Internet of Tins (IoT)

      1. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

        Re: Internet of Tins (IoT)

        At least it will be more secure than the current implimentation...

        and no subscription fees! Winner!

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Internet of Tins (IoT)

          You'll need to rent the sting though for a monthly fee :-)

          1. BamBamBara

            Re: Internet of Tins (IoT)

            2 sheets of double ply for a ball of string

  2. Mr Humbug

    Had an engineer out to a fault this morning

    He told me they had been instructed (not advised) not to enter premises unless it was a non-working critical service for a vulnerable person, in which case they could enter at their own discretion.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    BORKED !

    We're BORKED, all BORKED, I tell ye....

    Or M-BORC'ed, as the case may be.

  4. Roger Kynaston
    Thumb Up

    MBORC

    The next time a server falls in a heap because crappy java application is being shit I am going to use that one

  5. idiottaxpayerhere previously ishtiaq/theghostdeejay

    I know this

    won't work for everyone, but a few years ago I got fucked off with Virgin. I closed my account and until I found another supplier I temporarily used my phone as a hotspot. I still do. It streams Netflix in Hi def just fine. All for 18 and a half quid a month unlimited everything. No visits required.

    Cheers… Ishy

    1. Spanky_McPherson

      Re: I know this

      Though if anyone is thinking of using a 3G hotspot to replace a broadband connection, be aware you will likely not receive a publicly routable IP address.

      This will mean any application that requires you to open a port on your router won't work. For example, you won't be able to do remote streaming from your Plex server.

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: I know this

        "For example, you won't be able to do remote streaming from your Plex server."

        But since the whole point is to be able to work from home....

        1. Spanky_McPherson

          Re: I know this

          For some of us, the point is to be able to work from home.

          For others, it is to binge watch pirated movies over the internet... 'nuff said.

  6. BebopWeBop Silver badge

    Well, it beats many of their previous reasons for slow service.

  7. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    Wait a minute

    I may not be the brightest bulb in the bunch, but 23rd of March plus 3 weeks does not add up to 1st of June, however you count it.

    Seems to me that they're pushing things a bit.

    1. Nick Ryan Silver badge

      Re: Wait a minute

      Our beloved dictators in their latest knee jerk reaction don't have any form of exit plan (or plan at all really). Therefore BT is somewhat under-stating the calculations here as to when they feel things will be cleared up from a government that is only capable of making a mess (and then lying about it while re-appointing corrupt politicians).

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Wait a minute

      Parliament is closed for 4 weeks. What makes you think the 3 week promise meant anything? There’s not going to be any MP working to call off the lock down as they’re all on holiday. #inthistogether

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: Wait a minute

        There was no 3 week "promise". The announcement said the restrictions were for three weeks then they'd be looked at again and that *could* mean relaxing them. Or it could mean extending the duration and/or further restrictions.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Wait a minute

          Looked at by whom? Parliament is on holiday for 4 weeks

          1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

            Re: Wait a minute

            Parliament is not Government.

  8. Evil Genius

    Ohhh, you mean FUBAR.

    1. Anomalous Cowturd
      1. KarMann
        Alert

        Why not both?

        SNAFUBAR!

        ETA: Could even go for the triple-portmanteau, SNAFUBORC.

  9. Boris the Cockroach Silver badge

    How

    can we tell the difference between openretches normal operations and this new one?

  10. cosymart
    Holmes

    Optional - Really :-)

    I thought the home visits were insisted upon by BT et-al to justify their installation fee. So any new installations are now free?

    1. SImon Hobson Silver badge

      Re: Optional - Really :-)

      A connection isn't just the bit of damp string from the nearest pole to your house.

      Your connection fee is nominally paying a share of the cost of getting all those pairs to the green box down the road, and from there to the top of the nearest pole, etc, etc. So cutting out the last few feet of wire and a socket on the end of it isn't all that much of a saving.

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