back to article Come to Five Guys, where the software is as fresh as the burgers... or maybe not

Welcome to another instalment in our occasional series of software being poorly where it really shouldn't. Today it is Five Guys, where the burgers are fresh, but the software less so… Seeking to muscle in on McDonald's greasy grip on borkage comes upstart burger chain (in the UK at least) Five Guys and a very unhappy terminal …

  1. Aaiieeee
    Paris Hilton

    "Naturally, we would not suggest that the premium patty flinger's wares were as time-expired as Windows 7"

    Is there a name for the above kind of expression which rasies in the reader doubt regarding the quality of the burgers yet in the same statement absolves itself of any responsiblity of providing that viewpoint.

    I quite like it.

    1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      Politico-speak? Advert-speak? Lawyer-langauge?

    2. Kauppe

      It is called

      Apophasis

      1. Jedit Silver badge
        Joke

        "Apophasis"

        Wasn't he the villain in Stargate SG-1?

        1. Rafael #872397

          Re: "Apophasis"

          I think he was the villain in "X-Men: Return of the Last of X-Men Revenge of the Future"..

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      PosReady 7 (and Windows embedded 7) is still in Extended Support phase until 12 Oct 2021.

      So no Le Journalism here.

      I’d more worry about others still running W2K3 Server, SQL 2000 and XP Embedded. Some Tier One retailers. Inc in France.

      1. Drew Scriver Bronze badge

        (part of) the solution

        You're right, but it does bring to light a problem:

        How are consumers to know the PoS-software is up-to-date?

        Perhaps it's time for the regulation-happy EU to put their powers to good use and mandate that all software like this prominently displays the support status.

        For good measure it should also print the status (in bold, all caps) on the receipt.

        Something like:

        Your card transaction was processed by software that:

        IS NO LONGER SUPPORTED BY THE VENDOR AND/OR DOES NOT MEET THE REQUIRED SECURITY STANDARDS. YOUR CARD IS AT RISK

        or (hopefully)

        MEETS THE REQUIRED SECURITY STANDARDS

        1. NeilPost Bronze badge

          Re: (part of) the solution

          Most Card Payment software is certified to PCI/DSS standards. Even if the Operating System is not up date with patches- though this is recommended- as long as you put ‘adequate compensating controls’ around this you are fine.

          Point to Poiint Encryption -P2P between PED (Chip and Pin device) and Bank Acquirer is the norm these days, with tokenised card details, little in logs securing it. No Mag Swipes on tills with leaky data anymore on tills - built into chip terminals or just bit at all anymore..

          Unfortunately older software - opted in North America.is not quite their yet hence the repeated problems there. I can’t think of any UK retailer with POS Tills that has had any Card Payment breaxh in recent memory.

  2. Blake St. Claire

    upstart?

    upstart burger chain (in the UK at least) Five Guys

    I know I've seen a Five Guys or two in the vicinity of Trafalgar Square or a bit further down The Strand, and that would've been two or three or more years ago when last I was in the Big Smoke.

    Unless you mean compared to McDonalds and Burger King.

    1. Antron Argaiv Silver badge

      Re: upstart?

      I think their burgers and fries/chips taste far better (and are probably much worse for me) than either McD's or BK's.

      Mrs. Argaiv dislikes their burgers, but admits their fries/chips are excellent.

      1. R3sistance

        Re: upstart?

        Of course Five Guys fries and burgers taste better than MaccyDs or BurgKings... given it's like 4 times the cost. Who'd pay x4 the cost for a burger and fries that were down at McDs level, or worse BKs level.

        1. Muscleguy Silver badge

          Re: upstart?

          Well if their buns are more substantial than McD's (can't be hard) so they fill you up more and if their fries are actual chips and not matchsticks covered in flour* then they may well be worth paying more for. Their fries might be thrice cooked. If you have ever had or made them you will know what I mean.

          Thrice cooked taste fantastic but they have the added advantage that the final frying takes much less time to come to brown perfection. Also if you cook spud then cool it down the carbs become digestion resistant which raises the GI, adding to the 'I'm still full' feeling you don't get with McD's. Proper thrice cooked chips get cooled twice and that process is vital to the excellent result.

          Some say you need the last cooling to be overnight in the fridge but I reckon starting in the morning is easily sufficient.

          1. paulf Silver badge
            Meh

            Re: upstart?

            The concept of multiple cooked chips is bandied about by some establishments where I'm not sure they fully understand what it means. I had triple cooked chips at one apparently decent pub a few months ago, and I wasn't convinced they'd been cooked once, never mind three times.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: upstart?

        To be fair they have recently had a celebrity endorsement. Phillip Schofield is reported to have said having Five Guys is better.

    2. DoctorPaul

      Re: upstart?

      Ah Five Guys!

      Used to have one here in Kent (Westwood Cross) - and I swear that I never saw more than 4 people in there at a time, and 2 of those were staff :-)

      The location is now a phone shop.

      1. Mephistro Silver badge
        Devil

        Re: upstart?

        Yes, They sound exactly like "Los Pollos Hermanos" from Breaking Bad!

    3. Sgt_Oddball Silver badge
      Pint

      Re: upstart?

      There's a couple of them around here in Leeds, but truth be told there's a couple of bars nearby that sells better burgers with the added benefit of actual beers (not fizzy barley pop you get in five guys).

      Hell, one of the bars has 50 different beer taps. What a time to be alive! (and it is a Friday)

      1. Fursty Ferret

        Re: upstart?

        What's the bar called?

        1. Sgt_Oddball Silver badge
          Pint

          Re: upstart?

          Assembly Underground. Its the second bay owned by Vocation. The best burgers (by a hair) is Patty Smiths stand in the Belgrave music hall.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: upstart?

      If you're in paris, please don't go for a burger, have steak hache. If you head down the hill from Sacre Coeur into Monmatre, there's a pretty good bistro, but I can't for the life of me remember the name of it.

      1. Blake St. Claire

        Re: upstart?

        If you're in paris, ...

        As it is, I don't eat at McDonalds here. Don't worry, when I'm in Paris, or London, I don't eat at McDonalds either.

        Still waiting to get kidney again in my Steak and Kidney pie.

        1. TRT Silver badge

          Re: upstart?

          A Royale with cheese.

    5. Muscleguy Silver badge

      Re: upstart?

      There's in outlet in a central city mall here in Dundee, so a chain would seem to be an apt description. I have not darkened their door yet. I prefer to make my own burgers at home. Which reminds me, I'm out patties. Need mince. Meat, finely chopped onion, a hint of herbs, a smidgeon of garlic, mash together, form into patties, stack separated by squares of greaseproof paper, place in freezer bag and freeze. Mine tend to be lighter than the quarter pound but then I've see Supersize Me.

    6. werdsmith Silver badge

      Re: upstart?

      There are 5 guys and Byrons everywhere. Seem to be nothing very special from my one visit that precluded any further visits.

      It doesn’t matter how you dress up a burger, they are low end convenience food. Not worth a premium.

      1. James Hughes 1

        Re: upstart?

        Really? Five Guys burgers really are good in my experience. Not cheap, but very good. Family agrees.

        1. elaar

          Re: upstart?

          They're only very good compared to cheap fast food places.

          They're no better than a burger made at home, or one on the bbq.

          Their regular fries are 1000calories alone, which is pretty scary. It's never going to taste awful when a normal meal from there comes in at 2500calories

        2. BeerTokens

          Re: upstart?

          Def not worth the extra cash, horrid noisy place with tiled walls that the sound bounces off. burgers are passable but do not come close to the burgers served in my local. Beef from local butcher, then hand pressed on site, salad from garden out the back and buns baked in local artisan bakers. All for roughly the same price, including a pint, comfy chairs, and the ability to hear yourself think.

        3. werdsmith Silver badge

          Re: upstart?

          But ultimately it's still just a burger. Polishing turds etc.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: upstart?

        I've not seen a "Byrons" outside of London. The name sounds like a vacuum cleaner company.

        1. werdsmith Silver badge

          Re: upstart?

          Even Bury St. Edmunds has a Byron.

    7. WallMeerkat

      Re: upstart?

      I'm guessing they're meaning relative to McDs/BK who have been about for decades

      Certainly fiveguys in Belfast only opened within the past 5 years or so, and is inexplicably popular. Sure the burgers are nice, but for the price you could have a sit down waited meal and beer at a pub.

  3. Norphy

    If it's running on a till, chances are it's Windows 7 Embedded, which still has another year of support left on it...

  4. andy 103 Silver badge

    One of the better Windows releases

    Windows 7 is still around because - as far as Windows goes at least - it's considered a "good" version.

    In much the same way people retained XP over Vista, or 2000 over ME, etc.

    1. Captain Scarlet Silver badge
      Mushroom

      Re: One of the better Windows releases

      pfft 2000 > XP

    2. OGShakes

      Re: One of the better Windows releases

      ME replaced 98, it was not anything to do with 2000.

      1. 45RPM

        Re: One of the better Windows releases

        Much as I hate to say it, that was a very long time ago now - I think that the error can be forgiven for any OS which is older than people entering the workforce now.

  5. Skoorb

    It could be embedded

    To be fair, a load of the Embedded flavours of Windows 7 are still in support. Something like Windows Embedded POSReady 7 would be usable on systems like this for a while yet.

    1. OtakuN3rd

      Re: It could be embedded

      Knowing NCR, it definitely is the embedded version of Windows 7, POSReady7.

      1. jelabarre59 Silver badge

        Re: It could be embedded

        Knowing NCR, it definitely is the embedded version of Windows 7, POSReady7.

        It's MSWindows. It's ALWAYS "P.o.S. ready", but that has nothing to do with point of sale...

  6. mark l 2 Silver badge

    Even if they are using a desktop version of Windows 7 rather than an in support embedded version the amount they charge for a milkshake in 5 guys (£5+) means they can more than afford to pay MS for extended support.

    1. TRT Silver badge

      Ah yes. Extreme sucking.

  7. Andy The Hat Silver badge

    Bit disappointed

    "...premium patty flinger's ..."?

    Come come, where's the El Reg style? Premium patty pedlar, pusher, patter ... anything "p" based really :-)

    1. Allonymous Coward
      Headmaster

      Re: Bit disappointed

      Pricey Premium Patty Peddlar's Passé PoS OS

  8. Captain Scarlet Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Lazy gits

    It takes like 1 minute to slap your logo on a wallpaper and deploy it, even if its embedded!

    What else did they leave installed by default?

  9. 0laf Silver badge

    I'm sure they can afford support

    5 Guys.

    Been a few times, every time I find the bill jaw dropping for a few burgers, chips and a coke.

    I'll learn one day maybe.

    1. commonsense

      Re: I'm sure they can afford support

      Been a few times, every time I find the bill jaw dropping for a few burgers, chips and a coke.

      But you get loads of chips, and you can load up/down your burger, and the burger is better than anything Byron, McDs, BK, Honest, GBK or any other burger joint rustles up. I like Five Guys. And they give you a free drink if you turn up and your food isn't ready.

      1. The Oncoming Scorn Silver badge
        Pint

        Re: I'm sure they can afford support

        My local 5 Guys is probably the best "budget" burger anywhere around, more expensive than BK, McD etc, but as a fussy eater, I enjoy being able to specify what goes on the burger & I don't feel awkward\extorted by requesting pickles, mayo etc being removed for a burger at a higher price point (Fatburger).

      2. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: I'm sure they can afford support

        You forgot to mention Westlers boiled burgers from a street cart!

        Oh, sorry, have you spent long trying to forget their existence?

      3. wolfetone

        Re: I'm sure they can afford support

        5 Guys is a lot of things, but it does not provide you with a better burger than Burger King. Unless a smushed ball of greasy bread, squished beef patty and a random assortment of failed salad gets you going in the morning.

      4. elaar

        Re: I'm sure they can afford support

        "the burger is better than anything Byron, McDs, BK, Honest, GBK or any other burger joint rustles up"

        It's a beef pattie for god sake, it's not rocket science to make. Five guys seem to fool people into thinking their food is nice by putting a days RDA of salt into a meal, 2000calories+, and 50% fat.

        Definitely better than McD/BK, but that's hardly a fair comparison.

    2. John H Woods Silver badge

      Re: I'm sure they can afford support

      My expericence is that Five Guys, not unlike a lot of Bistro pubs, suffer from what I like to call "Nandos Syndrome": perfectly acceptable food in perfectly acceptable places being sold at a price point 2-3x greater than jusifiable. As contrasted with LEON, for expample, which is, in my limited experience, a little bit pricier than many fast food places, but quite a lot better.

      Food at £10/head just has to be good and fresh. Once you get over £20 and start to approach £30 per cover you need to be really special: not just the food, but the presentation, the location, the ambience and the service.

      NB: I'm outside London.

    3. SouthernLogic

      Re: I'm sure they can afford support

      For a cheeseburger and reg fries its $10 US. About 25% more than the bean burgers from McDonalds or Burger King, but its real meat. Not to mention the amt of fries you get is huge and taste fantastic. So when I feel like a cardiac event I go get me one.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Come on El Reg...

    Given that the EOL for Windows 7 POSready is October 12, 2021, these chaps aren't doing anything far wrong....

    I would have hoped for better from a reg reporter than to know an NCR EPOS till wouldn't be running Windows 7 in its standard iteration!

  11. Greg 38

    Slightly off-topic

    Reminds me of when I worked in the fab at Intel. Some of the operators were found to be playing solitaire on one of the optical character reader tools intended for reading the wafer serial numbers and orienting the wafers. The machines were running some flavor win98se or NT. Management then had all the games removed from every Windows machine across every fab. Note that this is the same management that didn't allow clocks in the fab either!

    1. dnicholas Bronze badge

      Re: Slightly off-topic

      Surely that just means leaving the cleanroom every 5 minutes to check the time left on your shift? Maybe this is why Intel 10nm was (is) so borked!

    2. TheProf
      Devil

      Re: Slightly off-topic

      My 'manager' had Spider Solitaire removed from my machine when someone complained I was playing it. I changed my wallpaper to a half-finished game just to wind the jealous b-stard up.

  12. mikus
    FAIL

    Who needs security.

    They will be the next on the credential leaks, but good thing they have insurance against that!

  13. a_yank_lurker Silver badge

    Five Guys

    While they are an improvement over indigestible (McD) and the unmentionable (BK) they do have stiff competition over here for highish end burger flippers. There are several regional and national chains that are direct competitors to them and some have a much better reputation than Five Guys (never tried a couple of them as they are not near me) at about the same price point. The biggest issue is they are not cheap and many traditional sit joints are at the same price point with a broader menu.

  14. The Nazz Silver badge

    Software being poorly where it didn't ought to be?

    Iowa?

    Ooops wrong thread.

    As an aside, isn't their issue, the collating of votes , one example where a five minute knocked up Excel "database" would have done the job admirably?

  15. Gene Cash Silver badge

    Hotdogs

    We have a couple bars that surpass Five Guys' pricey burgers in both price and quality. In addition to that, they allow you to sit down and have someone take your order and deliver your food. Spending $10 on a burger and having to stand there and wait for it is bullshit.

    One thing they do have that no one else does is decent hotdogs. That's my only reason for visiting once in a blue moon.

    I still always leave feeling vaguely ripped off. As a single guy, having a full paper bag of fries is a minus, not a plus. It's a lot of expensive waste in the bin a couple hours later.

  16. CJatCTi

    Windows 7 still servising customers in Sainsburys Cheltenham

    Just walking out of Sainsburies Cheltenam and I see the Wndows 7 flag flying on the PC a the customer services desk.

  17. ChrisBedford

    Naturally, I would not suggest that The Register is alone capable of churning a 337-word report on nothing of any value or interest at all.

    1. TRT Silver badge

      All the way... Or is that the black toppings rather than the red?

  18. Booty003

    Smile

    "the stale baguette of privacy"

    You have just made my day after a pretty fucking horrible weekend, cheers gang.

  19. vaporland

    five guys started in virginia...

    ...where I live, and while I cannot speak to the quality of their IT, their burgers and fries are delicious.

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