back to article 'Six' in the city: Kiwi sportswear shop telly beamed X-rated flicks for hours over weekend

A New Zealand plimsoll emporium has apologised for inadvertently playing smut on its promo screens for nine hours over the weekend. The manager of Asics' flagship kiwi store found the screen above the shop on Shortland Street, Auckland, playing smut films when he got into work at 10am on Sunday morning. He told the New …

  1. Winkypop Silver badge
    Devil

    Well done

    Not one mention of our quadrupedal, ruminant mammal friends.

    1. Khaptain Silver badge

      Re: Well done

      Don't you mean , mammary friends ?

      1. NoneSuch Silver badge
        Joke

        Alt-Title

        Plimsoll Pavilion Programming Perverted. Patrons Positively Perturbed.

        1. quxinot Silver badge

          Re: Alt-Title

          That is not the 7 'P's that I've normally seen.... Seems that both variations are appropriate here!

  2. adam payne Silver badge

    Security guard Dwayne Hinango told the paper he'd kept a beady eye on the situation for a couple of hours

    I'm sure he was.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Porn star name

      Dwayne H. In-an-Go? That's gotta be a porn star name if ever there was one.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Porn star name

        You've got to look long and hard for such a good example of nominative determinism

    2. Mark 85 Silver badge

      So he knew it was running porn for several hours? Have to wonder why he call the boss unless it was films he hadn't seen before.

      1. eldakka Silver badge

        Security guards are there for physical security.

        Unless there was a miscreant trespassing in-store to do this work, or there were signs of a break-in, why would a security guard get their boss out of bed?

    3. Pascal Monett Silver badge

      "he'd kept a beady eye on the situation for a couple of hours"

      As opposed to shutting the screen down and then looking for the source of the problem.

      Really. I do believe that, had I been responsible, I would have much preferred passersby seeing a black screen rather than that.

      I might have made a copy of the stream though, for "evidence", of course.

    4. PhilipN Silver badge

      It's a dirty job but...

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=81LuegGW3gA

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    playing smut on its promo screens for nine hours over the weekend

    For *hours*?!? What a coincidence that this hack coincided with the screens' power buttons developing a fault whereby they couldn't just be switched off.

    1. 's water music Silver badge

      For *hours*?!?

      I thought that as well, when I read it on the beeb this morning. El Reg makes it clearer when they say it started at 0100h and the store opens at 1000h.

      I like the lady with her kid who had to come back for another look using the the Pete Townshend defence.

  4. Blockchain commentard Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    Sounds like the time my laptop was taken over by hackers and I had to watch porn for hours as well. Fortuneately it was in the privacy of my home :-)

    1. sandman

      Your partner believed that old "hacker" excuse?

      1. 0laf Silver badge
        Paris Hilton

        Think you're missing the 'w' on 'hacker'.

        Paris coz' well, I'm sure tehre has been a bit of hacking done over her home movies.

  5. tiggity Silver badge

    second look

    Woman quoted as:

    "she had to take a second look because she just couldn't believe what she was seeing."

    Couldn't believe it? Did it feature a particularly well endowed performer then?

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Someone should get the boot for this.

    1. Alister Silver badge

      Have you no sole?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      That's puttin' the welly in orright!

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This embarrassing story for Asics has saved me some embarrassment, so thanks El Reg. I have a terrible habit of mispronouncing words I've only ever seen written down. Whenever I see this company's name on a shopfront or t-shirt they always put a logo that looks like a capital letter at the start of the name. In my head this company has always been "Oasics", a play on the word Oasis maybe I thought, through luck I've never actually said it out loud to anyone. That's right, there is no entry exam to become a commentard.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asics#/media/File:Asics.svg

    1. Crazy Operations Guy Silver badge

      I always thought it was a fancy 'B' and the name was 'Basics'. I've only saw it on athletic wear, so I has thought they were marketing on their stuff being a necessity to performing well in sports.

    2. Cuddles Silver badge

      "In my head this company has always been "Oasics", a play on the word Oasis maybe I thought, through luck I've never actually said it out loud to anyone."

      I thought exactly the same. But I have said it out loud to people, and they all thought that as well. You have to fail pretty badly at logo design to create one that consists of little more than just your company's name, yet still have no-one able to figure out what your company's name actually is.

  8. Stu_The_Jock

    "hacked" as in the same hack that a local driving school here in Norway had a few months ago (with the same result and choice of viewing material, beside one of the towns busiest roads) No one had thought to cover the IR sensor and some joker stands outside the window with a remote for that make of TV, and starts a playlist or a long video .. I believe some mobiles can also do this.

    1. Crazy Operations Guy Silver badge

      A local burger shop has a "Smart" TV that allows for streaming video from a mobile device up to it... They eventually disabled the feature not long after they got the thing...

  9. Ken Moorhouse Silver badge

    A toe curling experience...

    ...for all concerned.

  10. smudge Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    Moving pictures, please ...

    ... or it didn't happen!!

  11. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
    Coat

    TITSUP

    Total Inability To Screen Universal Programming

    icon --> I'll just get my dirty mac

  12. This post has been deleted by its author

  13. FozzyBear Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    Security guard Dwayne Hinango told the paper he'd kept a beady eye on the situation for a couple of hours.

    You have to admire his dedication. Not many people can sit through hours of porn

    I do wonder how many times he went back to his office to "knock out a quick report"

  14. G R Goslin

    well

    Well, the smut aspect should cut down the list of possible perps to a million or so!

    1. FozzyBear Silver badge
      Devil

      Re: well

      Considering some recent news articles in Australian Media, it doesn't even eliminate the Catholic Church.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hacked, in a similar fashion to the way my kitchen based Bluetooth speaker was that day I was in the shower.

    (Ahem)

  16. Charles Calthrop

    "had to have a second look"

    yeah right

    1. VikiAi Silver badge
      Go

      Well, would't you? and a third? and a fourth?

      1. Ken Shabby Bronze badge
        Holmes

        I'm sure the kiwi plod would be happy to look into it.

  17. hatti

    Cuffed

    I expect once the offender is reprimanded, he'll be in for a stiff sentence

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