back to article One of UK's largest pension funds goes to Hull, bids £504m for broadband firm KCOM

KCOM, the Hull-based telco that still has a monopoly fibre network in the city, has agreed to go private in a £504m deal agreed with the USSL, one of the UK's largest pension funds. Humber Bidco, a wholly owned subsidiary of Universities Superannuation Scheme Ltd (USSL), yesterday lodged a 97 pence per share offer – almost 34 …

  1. StuntMisanthrope

    Word of mouth.

    From what I can gather, it's already rather expensive, even before a fleet of foot pension fund moves in and reduces the pricing options. We have it covered however, by using our handy pint glasses as telescopes and secret hand signals from a distance. #polybiusrulez

  2. TimMaher Bronze badge
    FAIL

    Announced yesterday.

    ...and Barclays “Smart”Investor will tell me about this corporate action when?

    1. Ken Moorhouse Silver badge

      Re: Barclays “Smart”Investor

      You do realise there is another meaning for "smart" don't you?

      (of a wound or part of the body) feel or cause a sharp stinging pain.

  3. Semtex451 Silver badge
    Coat

    Typo?

    Should that be "guaranteed cash returns (to) ford shareholders"?

    1. Commswonk Silver badge

      Re: Typo?

      No I suspect "guaranteed cash returns (to) ford shareholders" would have been correct. I cannot for one moment see why Ford shareholders would be involved, other than fortuitously.

      1. Solarflare

        Re: Typo?

        I have no idea what you're on about, it was obviously meant to be fjord shareholders!

  4. Greg 16

    A lot of money

    So £3500 per customer? Seems expensive.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: A lot of money

      It is expensive, but KCOM has a monopoly there so they can milk their unfortunate customers for years to come. Anyone who wants to get online in Hull have no real alternatives.

      1. Nick Kew

        Re: A lot of money

        Wot, no 4G? And prospect of 5G?

        (I grant you Virgin is no alternative, so if Openreach reacheth not then there's a shortage of wired alternatives).

        1. phuzz Silver badge

          Re: A lot of money

          Virgin's selling point could just be; "you never have to deal with Openreach". So at least all the shittiness is confined to one company, rather than a shitty DSL provider having to deal with shitty Openreach.

  5. TimMaher Bronze badge
    Facepalm

    And...

    ...I have just looked at the offer and cashed out at a 50p premium per share.

    No thanks to “Smart”Investor.

    Still no corporate action flag.

    Oh for the days when they were Charles Schwab.

    1. Nick Kew

      Re: And...

      Good for you.

      But AFAICS it's not actually a corporate action, at least until and unless shareholders get to vote. You're not called on to make any decisions, other than buying/selling which you can of course do at any time.

  6. paulf Silver badge
    Meh

    Eclipse?

    I wonder what will happen to the former Eclipse Internet? I've been with them since ~2004, first on ADSL then 6 years ago moving to FTTC+Line rental. It was telling that they stopped taking on new retail customers around 2014 (I think) and now the inevitable conclusion of that plays out. I've had my exit routes planned for some time (Zen/A&A) but stayed put as things remain pretty sturdy (reliability wise) while their lack of interest in the retail customers meant no price rises, and not applying restrictions if you exceed your FTTC allowance.

    What worries me is the remaining Eclipse customers end up being sold to the Broadband company graveyard that is Talk Talk, and then having a mad scramble to get me and parental units out fast enough before it all goes to shit.

  7. tin 2

    "KCOM, founded in 1904, floated on the London Stock Exchange in 1999 and, as pointed out by the Financial Times, was something of a darling in the City, climbing from 225p on day one to £16. Then the dot-com bust happened."

    They also purchased companies like Omnetica and Eclipse and royally screwed them up. Because the people at the top have absolutely no clue what they're doing. So balls to them quite frankly.

  8. J.G.Harston Silver badge

    It wasn't really founded in 1904. That was when Kingston City Council Telephone Department opened its first exchange. KCOM really only become a thing in the 1990s.

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