back to article Holy sh*tsnacks! Danger zone! Edinburgh Uni's Archer 2 super 'puter will cost a cool £79m

The University of Edinburgh is getting a new supercomputer for academic and commercial research, and now we know it'll cost around 79 million quid. The project is funded by HM Treasury as part of a £200m investment in British innovation, announced in the Spring Statement by the Chancellor of the Exchequer, Philip Hammond, …

  1. Sgt_Oddball Silver badge

    *sploosh*

    Do the opporators require tactical turtlenecks as a mandatory dress code?

    Nice of them to try and announce it before the summer..

    1. m0rt Silver badge

      Re: *sploosh*

      Phrasing!

      1. m0rt Silver badge

        Re: *sploosh*

        Anyone?

        1. AdamT

          Re: *sploosh*

          YOU'RE NOT MY SUPERVISOR!

        2. Kane Silver badge

          Re: *sploosh*

          We're done with phrasing.

        3. Ken 16 Silver badge

          Re: *sploosh*

          Hold on, I had something for this!

          1. Killing Time

            Re: *sploosh*

            LANA!☝️

            1. Tom Servo

              Re: *sploosh*

              WHAT?

              danger zone.

              1. m0rt Silver badge

                Re: *sploosh*

                Eat a dick, El Reg comments.

      2. Kane Silver badge
        Pint

        Re: *sploosh*

        If the good lord didn't intend for us to drink in the morning, he wouldn't have invented Gin.

        Or Vodka.

        Or Whiskey.

        Or leftover Vermouth, if you're in a pinch.

        1. Ken 16 Silver badge

          Re: *sploosh*

          Bloody Mary, full of vodka, blessed are you among cocktails. Pray for me now at the hour of my death, which I hope is soon. Amen.

  2. Stoneshop Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    Perfect timing

    Switch it on now, and it could be able to figure out the solution to the Brexit backstop for the Irish, according to Hammond himself. Next would be Scottish independence and return to the EU, but it might need a slice of fairy cakehaggis for that.

    1. Ken 16 Silver badge

      Re: Perfect timing

      sliced haggis is only good on burgers - you want a deep fried one

  3. Lorribot

    Will they have to give back if Scotland leaves the UK after Brexit?

    1. Phil Lord

      Well, given the Scotland pays for the UK government as well, hard to see how that would work.

      Besides, if you use that logic, the remnants of the UK would have to give back everything that Scotland paid for. Unfortunately, that would include Margaret Thatcher and 40 years of failed economic policies, so I am not sure that Scotland would want them.

  4. TRT Silver badge

    On campus data centres...

    now there's a novel idea.

  5. Herby Silver badge

    For that money...

    You could buy a BUNCH of Raspberry Pi's and make a GIANT cluster. It might even do some computation in parallel.

    Oh, there might even be some money left over to figure out how to compute the answer as well.

    Yes, I believe that somewhere there is a cluster like this actually doing some work.

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: For that money...

      > how to compute the answer as well.

      The answer is easy !

      The question, .... now that's going to need something whose mearest operational parameters this is not worthy of calculating

      1. MAF

        Re: For that money...

        Wow, that's a really Deep Thought... :-)

    2. tfb Silver badge
      Boffin

      Re: For that money...

      Just in case this is a serious comment: yes you could (and it's reasonably likely that some future HPC systems will have really stupid numbers of relatively wimpy cores), but what costs the money is the interconnect.

    3. TRT Silver badge

      Re: For that money...

      Scottish raspberries?

    4. DontFeedTheTrolls
      Boffin

      Re: For that money...

      Stanford and others have made similar clusters with Sony Playstation PS2 and PS3

  6. PhilipN Silver badge

    Next steps : (1) reinforce Hadrian's Wall

    and cast iron immigration policy to keep out the Sassenachs fixating on Br*****

    Then (2) give citizenship to all overseas Scots and their descendants. Result : Most dynamic country on the planet!

    1. Bonzo_red

      Re: Next steps : (1) reinforce Hadrian's Wall

      Is the POTUSA allowed to have dual citizenship?

  7. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

    The rest of the Spring Statement could do with scrutiny. He seems to have made a statement that MPs should compromise of Brexit that lead the Beeb at least to get so excited they more or less ignored anything else he said. It sounds as if he might have been trying to distract attention from whatever bad news he might have hidden in there.

    1. Jellied Eel Silver badge

      It might just run Crysis

      I think the Spring Statement is basically the £200m on a supercomputer in order to perform sophisticated economic models. I guess there's a fair degree of uncertainty around UK Plc's finances, although import duty and VAT on Archer 2 might be slightly more certain. Then again, Labour did forget to include VAT on their Olympics spend. I wonder if Scotland's going to make this the world's first wind-powered supercomputer though?

      1. Korev Silver badge
        Coat

        Re: It might just run Crysis

        Brexit is a huge gamble, maybe they should use a Monte Carlo method to look into it...

    2. HieronymusBloggs Silver badge
      Headmaster

      "He seems to have made a statement that MPs should compromise of Brexit that lead the Beeb at least to get so excited they more or less ignored anything else he said."

      s/of/on

      s/lead/led

      Shame on you, Doctor. :-)

  8. m0rt Silver badge

    "The new machine will be used to run "massive research simulations" in areas like medicine, climate science and aerospace."

    Ahhhhh good. Nice to see marketing and PR get to flex their tiny muscles.

  9. xyzabc

    Have they not heard of cloud?

  10. Omgwtfbbqtime Silver badge

    So Ebay will be flooded with really, really cheap Xeon E5 v2 chips?

  11. Toilet Duk

    So if Scotland becomes independent do we get it back from them?

    1. Ken 16 Silver badge
      Paris Hilton

      Who's this 'We'?

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