back to article Q. How exactly do you test car seats? A. With this sweaty 'robutt' that twerks for days and days

Picture a massive robotic arm gloved with a damp, arse-shaped cushion twerking into a chair for three days straight. That's how automaker Ford tests the durability of its car seats, at least in Europe. The car biz, which now fancies itself a mobility service company, revealed its backside simulator, referred to as "Robutt," …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "Picture a massive robotic arm gloved with a damp, arse-shaped cushion twerking into a chair for three days straight."

    what, you mean like the ones that they (used to) have in IKEA stores running all time (ie considerably longer than 3 days)

    1. JetSetJim Silver badge

      yes, although I don't think those sweated into the seats

  2. redpawn Silver badge

    Last I checked

    sweat is not just water and how does this help the seat keep my hands from going numb from bad back pressure points?

    1. Nolveys Silver badge

      Re: Last I checked

      I was just going to say that they really should use brine if they want to arrive at a valid ass-essment.

  3. Kevin McMurtrie Silver badge

    This is why seats fail

    I wear out the bolsters from the routine of squeezing in and out of the car with hardly any room to open the door.

    1. Evil Auditor Silver badge

      Re: This is why seats fail

      Get a smaller car. Or find a larger parking space.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: This is why seats fail

      Actually, you have a rather valid point. This test is IMHO incomplete.

      There is considerable wear caused by swivelling in and out of the seat when entering and leaving the car. Some of that is at full body weight, and that causes a heck of a lot more friction than just sitting in it whilst driving.

      1. Ugotta B. Kiddingme

        Re: This is why seats fail

        "This test is IMHO incomplete.

        There is considerable wear caused by swivelling in and out of the seat when entering and leaving the car. Some of that is at full body weight, and that causes a heck of a lot more friction than just sitting in it whilst driving."

        So then you mean tests more like this or, even more realistic this?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: This is why seats fail

          Absolutely - that is where I see wear. Thanks for that - let's hope Ford uses them too, sweaty or not :).

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    They could have just paid me (handsomely)

    In return for money, I'd have squirmed and sweated into their seats. And for extra money, I'd have delivered regular, corrosive gas discharges.

    Sheesh. Robotics are just so basic.

    1. Mark 85 Silver badge

      Re: They could have just paid me (handsomely)

      But there should be an extra charge for spilling coffee, soft drinks, beer, maybe French fries and other tidbits. Then there's the "special" cases that have been reported by various "news" services about people eating whole fried chickens and other greasy foods.

      1. jmch Silver badge

        Re: They could have just paid me (handsomely)

        Not to mention all of the above combined with heated seats...

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Can I be the first to offer additional "special" testing services for the back seats?

    1. Ken Shabby
      Facepalm

      Can I be the first to offer additional "special" testing services for the back seats?

      Be careful you might get the boot.

    2. 2+2=5 Silver badge

      > Can I be the first to offer additional "special" testing services for the back seats?

      I’m not sure that TWO large, sweaty men eating greasy chicken and spilling drinks on the back seat is a common enough scenario in a Fiesta to warrant a dedicated test.

      :-)

  6. Neil Barnes Silver badge
    Terminator

    Quotes

    George Orwell - If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever.

    Ford - if you want a vision of the future, imagine a robotic arse doing the same.

  7. Graham Lee

    Low resolution

    "The Register isn't entirely sure why Rohwer would argue that exercise would be more a part of our everyday lives during the rather chilly month of January (at least for those in the Northern Hemisphere) than it would at other times of the year."

    Gym membership is highest in January.

    1. Unicornpiss Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Low resolution

      "Gym membership is highest in January."

      Maybe so, but at least where I live, if you had a sweaty ass and went outside in January, you'd soon have a very frozen, sweaty ass.

      Not to knock the seat testing. At least their method isn't half assed.

    2. Arthur the cat Silver badge

      Re: Low resolution

      Gym membership is highest in January.

      Yes. "New Year, New Me", get gym membership, go a few times in January, once in February, never for the rest of the year.

      Personally, I'm quite happy with the old me so don't bother with such nonsense.

    3. DavCrav Silver badge

      Re: Low resolution

      I suspect it's also that people drive to the exercise venue when it's cold, and run outdoors or run/cycle to the exercise venue when it's warm.

  8. Dave 15

    sweat...water?

    er, most peoples sweat contains a lot more than water.

    Mind you, the whole discussion would be a great advert for someone selling replacement car seats (not just covers) for the buyers of second hand cars. Maybe I will try setting something up

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I wonder...

    ..if Ford saw my sister's worn through-to-the-framework Focus driving seat after she had traded it in. Admittedly she has a serious weight issue.....but it was not that old and she only did around 3000 miles/year.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Disappointed

    " Ford towel not included. ®"

    I was expecting this to be a reference to a towel owned by one Mr. Prefect. Very handy item, ya know.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Back in the 90's I did some work for a medical company that made breast implants. They had a similar machine whose sole job, 24x7 was playing with false diddies.

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