back to article Norwegian tourist board says it can't a-fjord the bad publicity from 'Land of Chlamydia' posters

An ad campaign branding Norway the "Land of Chlamydia" has been slapped down by tourist bosses. The posters, which could easily be mistaken for those plastering the walls of airports, show crystal-blue fjords, snow-capped mountains, lush greenery and even a couple in traditional Norwegian dress. Over the top, one reads: " …

  1. tiggity Silver badge

    "Norwegians are not good at using condoms."

    How hard can it be?

    1. Jay 2

      Re: "Norwegians are not good at using condoms."

      I'd say the answer would be quite if using them properly...

    2. Ken Moorhouse Silver badge

      Re: "Norwegians are not good at using condoms."

      Summed up by the phrase:-

      Ignordic coverup

      1. Alistair Silver badge
        Coat

        Re: "Norwegians are not good at using condoms."

        @Ken Moorhouse.

        Dammit, you owe me a double-double -- I managed to miss the keyboard.

        p.s. brilliant

    3. macjules Silver badge

      Re: "Norwegians are not good at using condoms."

      Hmm. Looks suspiciously to me like a Troll attack.

    4. 2+2=5 Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: "Norwegians are not good at using condoms."

      Perhaps it's the cost that's the problem? They just need to be more afjordable.

      1. Def Silver badge

        Re: "Norwegians are not good at using condoms."

        Perhaps it's the cost that's the problem?

        I realise you were joking, but I just thought I'd chime in and note that the Norwegian health service gives condoms away for free to anyone who wants them. You just have to order them online. (Which is why there are never many on sale in the shops.)

    5. W.S.Gosset Bronze badge

      Re: "Norwegians are not good at using condoms."

      >How hard can it be?

      Sir, you're a genius.

    6. jgarbo

      Re: "Norwegians are not good at using condoms."

      When it's hard it's easy.

    7. Spasticus Autisticus
      Happy

      Re: "Norwegians are not good at using condoms."

      @tiggity

      giggity :-)

  2. Dippywood

    "...so they can make sure they're also forearmed"

    Is it the strange practice of "forearming" that spreads it then? No wonder there's confusion regarding the use of the condom...

  3. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

    Norwegians seem like uncouth, lewd, sex-mad people

    And this is putting tourists off ?

    1. Aladdin Sane Silver badge

      Re: Norwegians seem like uncouth, lewd, sex-mad infectious people

      FTFY

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Norwegians seem like uncouth, lewd, sex-mad people

      It's the Magaluf of the North.

    3. Jay Lenovo Silver badge
      Flame

      Re: Norwegians seem like uncouth, lewd, sex-mad people

      7-Eleven is just selling outsiders a mild love salsa alternative.

      Most Norwegians, seem to prefer their genitals burning red hot.

  4. Ima Ballsy
    Holmes

    Maybe they .....

    get some slogans from here :

    https://www.netjeff.com/humor/item.cgi?file=CondomSlogans

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Norwegians, the Koalas of the Human race.

    <Box intentionally left empty>

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Norwegians, the Koalas of the Human race.

      I think the problem is intentionally filling the box.

  6. Howard Hanek Bronze badge
    Happy

    Norwegian History

    At the turn of the Twentieth Century Norway as a country was dying. So many people were emigrating that the country was almost depopulated. What a lost opportunity. If it weren't for their oil they'd be among the least important, poorest countries in Europe. They'd be back to using reindeer as their primary motive power.

    1. Hollerithevo Silver badge

      Re: Norwegian History

      And 118 years later, look at their proud achievements!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Norwegian History

      "What a lost opportunity. If it weren't for their oil they'd be among the least important, poorest countries in Europe."

      Being said of the UK for squandering its North sea oil wealth rather than being like Norway and investing it sensibly. Now possibly doubling down with Brexit.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Norwegian History

        Being said of the UK for squandering its North sea oil wealth rather than being like Norway and investing it sensibly. Now possibly doubling down with Brexit.

        Last time Norway had a referendum to join the EU, the answer was no. Just sayin'.

    3. CheesyTheClown

      Re: Norwegian History

      I think if you checked the Norwegian economy, you might find oil and natural gas doesn't account for as much as you might think.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Norwegian History

      > At the turn of the Twentieth Century Norway as a country was dying.

      I don't understand why the quoted post has so many downvotes. It is true that Norway was a very poor country at the turn of the 20th century, as any Norwegian will be happy to tell you or as you can read on any Norwegian history book. It is also true that North Sea oil fundamentally turned around their fortunes (helped by hard work, good planning and strong social ethics, obviously).

      One thing: at about six million people, the country is almost depopulated by European standards, especially the Northeast. Which is what makes it such a great place for hiking and ski touring trips.

      1. arctic_haze Silver badge

        Re: Norwegian History

        That explains why the Hunger novel by Hamsun was even possible in late 19th century Kristiania (now Oslo).

  7. jamesdagger

    I applaud this poster

    Clap clap.

  8. Blockchain commentard Silver badge
    Childcatcher

    How will they make babies

    if they all use condoms?

    1. GIRZiM

      Re: How will they make babies

      Same way people make balloon animals - just with condoms instead of balloons - simples.

    2. Warm Braw Silver badge

      Re: How will they make babies

      Like this? You'd probably need a variety pack...

      Edit: Apologies to GIRZiM - posting clash. Regard this as additional information, likely unwanted...

      1. GIRZiM

        Re: How will they make babies

        No need to apologise - I'm not offended to learn there is another great mind out there thinking the same things as me ;-)

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Why wouldn't they use condoms? I find they give a "baroque" feel and you can endless fun with the fiddly bits.

  10. Marketing Hack Silver badge
    Devil

    Perhaps the Norwegians would feel better if the campaign had a theme song?

    Maybe Fitz and the Tantrums "Handclap" or the Elvis Presley classic "Burning Love"?

  11. GreggS

    Sometimes you just don't get the rubber the green.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This is just a ploy to distract from the man in the UK

    https://news.nationalgeographic.com/2018/03/gonorrhea-evolving-untreatable-spd/

    A man in the U.K. has contracted what is being called the "worst-ever" case of "super-gonorrhea."

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: This is just a ploy to distract from the man in the UK

      Nice but that reporting is awful. It's a set of disjointed quotations with scant logical connection between them saying something about antibiotics resistance. Was National Geographic always thus?

      1. Uncle Slacky Silver badge

        Re: This is just a ploy to distract from the man in the UK

        > Was National Geographic always thus?

        Only since it was bought by Rupert Murdoch:

        https://news.nationalgeographic.com/2015/09/150909-21st-century-fox-media-partnership/

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: This is just a ploy to distract from the man in the UK

          FFS

          Is nothing sacred?

          I used to love national geographic. It's going to go downhill now.

  13. Stuart Halliday

    They need to electrify Sex.

    After last week's announcement to use electric vehicles for everything, it could work!

    1. CheesyTheClown

      Ummm been done

      There's a chain called Kondomriet all over Norway that sells electric replacements for sexual activities that generally require fluid exchange between participants.

      They even advertise them pretty much everywhere with an "Orgasm guarantee". Though I wonder if that's just a gimmick. How many people would actually attempt to return a used item such as that.

      1. W.S.Gosset Bronze badge

        Re: Ummm been done

        well... if it was eligible for return, it'd still be fairly clean.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Probably Putin, so they can't Putitin!

    From Novichok to Norway-Shock.

  15. David Roberts Silver badge

    Norwegian wood?

    Must be a joke in there somewhere.

  16. 89724102172714582892524I9751670349743096734346773478647892349863592355648544996312855148583659264921

    In the old days... brown paper bag soaked in vinegar.... Did it work? Haven't been tracked down yet.

  17. handleoclast Silver badge

    For shame

    So perhaps it's best for those visiting the Nordic land to be forewarned, so they can make sure they're also forearmed.

    No mention of being foreskinned. I'm disappointed. Must try harder.

  18. Claverhouse Bronze badge

    This sort of vulgar ad demonstrates perfectly why advertising scum should be forced to wear distinctive clothing in public and always served last as second-class beings.

  19. Overflowing Stack

    At 11 quid a pint

    I'm surprised anyone has it off

    1. phuzz Silver badge
      Pint

      Re: At 11 quid a pint

      Mind you, I'd expect large families from those that do pair off.

      After all, what else are you going to do in the evenings if going down the pub is too expensive?

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