back to article Apple leak: If you leak from Apple, we'll have you arrested, says Apple

Apple has gone full swivel-eyed, control-freak crazy on its own employees with a demented internal memo decrying information leaks. "In 2017, Apple caught 29 leakers. 12 of those were arrested," says the terror missive from Cupertino, ironically leaked to Bloomberg. "Among those were Apple employees, contractors and some …

  1. Chairman of the Bored Silver badge
    Pint

    Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

    Simply brilliant. Whoever you are, have a pint on me.

    1. sanmigueelbeer Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

      Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

      The leaker probably read this memo and thought: Challenge accepted!

      1. m0rt Silver badge

        Re: Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

        "Leaking Apple’s work undermines everyone at Apple and the years they’ve invested in creating Apple products… The impact of a leak goes beyond the people who work on a particular project - it’s felt throughout the company."

        The impact of the leak? Really?

        I suppose the impact on your unsold stock of current iShiny may be hit. But really, Apple, you truly are just another self righteous, narcissistic, lifestyle wannabee, tax dodging, grubby little American corporate.

        Who else would make so much out of a thin laptop, then promptly allow root access without a password?

        1. Dan 55 Silver badge

          Re: Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

          I guess their competitors might be able to get an advantage if they find out some secret proprietary insider information - they're going to release a new phone which is like the old phone from last year, a tablet which is like the old tablet from last year, a new OS which is like the old OS from last year, and not do anything at all with their computer range.

          1. lglethal Silver badge
            Trollface

            Re: Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

            Alright Dan, who's your source? That leaker's ass is going to be fired! How dare they release our strategy for the upcoming year! Yes I know it's the same plan that we've used for the last 10 years, thats exactly why they'll never see it coming!

      2. Smooth Newt
        WTF?

        Re: Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

        In 2017, Apple caught 29 leakers. 12 of those were arrested

        These figures are meaningless without Apple also giving an estimate of how many leakers they didn't catch. e.g. if there were 10,000 leaks in 2017 then the odds of being caught were pretty low; if 30 leaks then the odds were very high. I am curious why the company didn't think it would benefit from providing this essential figure.

        1. dbtx Bronze badge

          re: curious

          On the first hand, it may be that they know being able to calculate risks will embolden some. Nobody knowing exactly what are the odds might contribute to the potential leakers' hesitation. It could be a weird kind of FUD, same thing only different.

          On the other hand, Apple probably doesn't want or need people to think in/with/about numbers; they like everyone to be properly distracted by how thin and shiny it is. Maybe they're just being a little bit consistent.

        2. Tom 38 Silver badge
          Boffin

          Re: Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

          ..meaningless without Apple also giving an estimate of how many leakers they didn't catch

          Problem with that is the same problem with declaring something bug free. Testing shows the presence, not the absence of bugs, as some nutty professor once said.

          Now I must return to organising complexity, mastering multitude and avoiding its bastard chaos as effectively as possible.

        3. Oh Homer
          Holmes

          Re: "These figures are meaningless"

          Another missing factoid is how many of the 12 supposedly "arrested" were ever actually charged with a crime, if any, and if so then how many were ever successfully prosecuted.

          I'll take a flying guess at "none", and say this is just Apple throwing its shiny toys out of the pram.

          Incidentally, I had to Google for clues as to what might actually qualify as "criminal" when leaking details of a forthcoming product, and apparently the answer is "trade secrets". Yeah, because it's a "trade secret" that next year's Apple gizmos will be nearly indistinguishable from last year's. No, really.

          Funny how my hatred for Microsoft has waned over the years, and yet my hatred for Apple just keeps intensifying, to the point of pure white rage. I guess this must be because Microsoft lost nearly all its arrogance with the departure of Ballmer, whereas the High Priests at the Cult of Apple are more obnoxious than ever, despite the loss of their cult leader.

          Unfortunately for Apple, the congregation no longer seems to share their devotion. The price for this fall from grace is the threat of being sent to the dungeon, apparently. Such pettiness smacks of desperation.

          1. dbtx Bronze badge

            Re: "These figures are meaningless"

            "despite the loss of their cult leader"

            Seems he took the plot with him.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

      They're only taking a leaf out of the DXC employees playbook.

    3. J. R. Hartley Silver badge

      Re: Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

      Proof, if proof be need be, that Apple really are a shower of cunts.

    4. big_D Silver badge
      Pint

      Re: Leaking the anti-leak memo to Bloomberg

      Look for the only guy on campus with an Android phone and a Hotmail email address.

  2. Oh Homer
    Trollface

    Arrested?

    For what, a civil dispute?

    Since when is breaching some fruity toymaker's company policy a matter of criminal law?

    Freaking megalomaniacs.

    And the real laugh is, Apple hasn't even had anything worth leaking in years anyway, and even the stuff that was vaguely interesting turned out to be all hype and no substance. Actually, come to think of it, that would be basically everything ever made by Apple.

    Maybe this is some kind of guerilla (or should that be gorilla?) marketing stunt. You know, look how tough we're getting on "criminal" leakers, because we really have something that's actually worth leaking for a change. Honest.

    Nah.

    1. Chairman of the Bored Silver badge

      Re: Arrested?

      Arrested for civil dispute... Well, the United States has a very sordid past of companies corrupting law enforcement. Mainly during the earlier part of the industrial revolution... Union breakers who would modulate your orthopaedic health, provide free tooth extraction services and so forth - with the tacit or active support of law enforcement and local government.

      Interesting our supposedly "enlightened" and "post industrial" fruity friends are experiencing a similar testosterone surge.

      1. sanmigueelbeer Silver badge

        Re: Arrested?

        Well, the United States has a very sordid past of companies corrupting law enforcement.

        So what has changed? How many Senators, Congressmen (and women), and other public servant get an "allowance" from big companies? Some retire to sit as Board Members.

        As the late Robin Williams once said in his performances at Washington, DC: "Did you fuck him?" He looks at the crowd and continued with, "What wrong with that? It is a legitimate question, for Washington."

        The question, of course, was a joke but the audiences were staff members from the "Hill" and they can be heard laughing.

      2. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

        Re: Arrested?

        This is the USA we are talking about.

        In most states, if you nick something worth $1001, you can be sent down for life. In Virginia is it apparently $501.

        Fart in Public and that can be a $5000 fine.

        Apple's statement is by contrast seems very reserved.

        1. Oh Homer
          Headmaster

          Re: Arrested?

          Sorry, I forgot for a moment that America is the "Land of the Free" ... to be arrested for utter trivia. Get arrested three times in a row for utter trivia, and they throw you into a bottomless pit, next to the other 25% of the world's prison population of trivia violators.

          Although this is only to be expected in a country that values money higher than life itself.

          Not that I seriously believe that Apple would actually lose a dime over such "trade secrets" as the fact that an iThing now has a stupid looking and functionally pointless notch cut right into the screen, for instance.

          Personally I think Apple should be forced to prove in court that it has ever in fact had a trade secret worth a damn, then be forced to prove exactly how much that secret was worth while it remained a secret, and explain in great detail exactly why.

          Advance knowledge of any product release has never caused me to be any more or less likely to buy anything than had that information not been available until the day of launch. I can't imagine how it possibly could. If I don't like it today, and it won't be any different when it's launched two months from now, than I'm not magically going to like it then either.

          And as for competitors rushing to copy Apple's "secrets" ... it takes months if not years to get a new product to market, with or without copying others' ideas, so the fact that e.g. Samsung might learn some trade secret from Apple, two months prior to launch, would be of zero benefit to them, as they won't have time to retool and re-engineer quickly enough to beat them to market. Plus Apple would just sue post-launch anyway, so it'd be pointless, pretty much like the entire concept of "trade secrets" itself, in fact, in a Draconian "IP" regime where keeping "secrets" is utterly redundant.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Arrested?

      Maybe someone should "arrest" apple for stealing all Samsung's ideas.

      1. gnasher729 Silver badge

        Re: Arrested?

        "Maybe someone should "arrest" apple for stealing all Samsung's ideas."

        Wasn't there a lawsuit where Samsung's chief UI designer had a notebook with 130 pages of features that Samsung planned to copy from the iPhone?

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The First Rule Of Apple Club.

    Who doesn't know this?

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Big Brother

      Re: The First Rule Of Apple Club.

      You spit out the seeds?

      Meanwhile, John "We know where you children live" Bolton has been seen to exit the Apple boardroom.

      1. dbtx Bronze badge
        Pirate

        Re: The First Rule Of Apple Club.

        they say an imperial cup (two handfuls?) of apple seeds can deliver the right amount of ${that_chem} which metabolizes into cyanide

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: The First Rule Of Apple Club.

        You spit out the seeds?

        Sounds like a question for Tim Cook. Or perhaps a question he asks.

  4. Nate Amsden Silver badge

    reminds me of a friend who tried to recruit me into apple

    He was an outside vendor with lots of close connections internally at Apple. I was over at his house one time and he started to tempt me with an opportunity at Apple, but he couldn't tell me more than that. Until he had a half dozen drinks then he surrendered and told me it was with the maps group who had yet to launch (maybe even announce, I don't recall the specific timeline) their product. I still wasn't interested but thought it was funny. He was tight lipped until he had a few drinks then said aw fuckit and spilled the beans. He left that company a few years ago now.

    Still no interest in working for apple or any other big company, at the time he tried it to me as apple was like a lot of little independent startups so it didn't have a big company feel. Still not something I am interested in pursuing.

    1. GIRZiM Bronze badge

      Re: reminds me of a friend who tried to recruit me into apple

      Sounds like a cult

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Alert

        Re: reminds me of a friend who tried to recruit me into apple

        Sounds like a cult...

        Damn that autocorrect.

  5. Tigra 07 Silver badge

    You're leaking it wrong!

  6. Slx

    People also just guess what their next product might be. A lot of them are fairly obvious or can be deduced.

  7. This post has been deleted by its author

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      I don't know but if football results need to be embargoed, there is something very fishy going on,

    2. diodesign (Written by Reg staff) Silver badge

      Re: embargoes

      Yeah, there are a ton of embargoes in the tech world. Some other journos might be given new gadgets to review under embargo to a certain date - usually the launch date, so when the announcement goes out, all the reviews go live.

      The whole thing can be icky if you're essentially propelling a marketing campaign.

      Do we do stuff under embargo? Not going to bullshit you: yes, from time to time. Real example: a chip company has a day or two of technical briefings on architecture features and designs, under embargo that lifts a week later. That gives hacks a week to write a decent technical deep-dive, ask questions, get answers, without trying to rush and race each other to be first. Generally, it produces better technical pieces if the writer is careful to leave out the spin + marketing claims.

      Another real example: a vulnerability is found, journalist is tipped off with an embargo that lifts when the fix is out. No point dropping a zero-day on the world when there's no exploit code in the wild. Better to reveal the flaw when a patch is ready, unless it is under active attack - in which case, the cat is out the bag and ppl need to be alerted to mitigations and threats.

      If you're the kind of journo who feels obliged to kiss a vendor's ass because it gave you a heads up, you'll get more stuff under embargo and do more ass kissing. If you're like El Reg and, in the words of a PR at one big IT name, "go off script all the time", then you tend not to get invited to embargoed launches, etc.

      So, yeah, we do some stuff under embargo if it makes a better package for readers, not to suit someone's marketing launch.

      Another real example: an El Reg vulture was told under embargo that a mid-level IT supplier was about to buy a startup. Then the embargo was pushed back a few days, then again to a yet-to-be-decided date, meaning the story couldn't run at all without breaking the embargo. The vulture separately learned of the acquisition through two other sources, while the companies were stalling and ironing out the press announcement stuff.

      So, we broke the embargo and ran the story early based on the separate info we got. We weren't going to let a now vague embargo put the kibosh on reporting. Embargoes are informal deals, not legal agreements. If you break them, you don't get them again. Sometimes that's no bad thing.

      PS: The footie embargoes are for newspaper print and evening telly deadlines. If a player gives a set of interviews for the next morning's papers or that night's sports shows, they all agree to hold back the coverage until the agreed time so that it's not a rushed frenzy free for all.

      Embargoes can be useful for logistics and giving ppl time to prepare a decent package. Relying on embargoed info or falling into the trap of helping a multinational make more money, not so much.

      C.

      1. sanmigueelbeer Silver badge

        Re: embargoes

        Another real example: a vulnerability is found, journalist is tipped off with an embargo that lifts when the fix is out. No point dropping a zero-day on the world when there's no exploit code in the wild. Better to reveal the flaw when a patch is ready, unless it is under active attack - in which case, the cat is out the bag and ppl need to be alerted to mitigations and threats.

        This sounds like the Spectre and Meltdown announcement by El Reg (January 2018). Caught everyone with their pants down, d1ck on their hands and the camera flashing.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: embargoes

          Accidentally deleted original post, here it is for reference.

          I'm curious, does tech news also have embargoes like football?

          https://mobile.twitter.com/Ian_Ladyman_DM/status/982282393330634752

          https://mobile.twitter.com/JBurtTelegraph/status/982283491692998657

          https://mobile.twitter.com/hirstclass/status/982282132319100928

          Edit: The content in question was supposed to be released at 22:30 so that the newspapers could maximise profits on their sports pages for the Saturday morning. However in a press conference the manager let it slip and one reporter decided to release the information which is why they all got a bit pissy about it.

          @diodesign

          Thanks for the reply that makes perfect sense.

          1. onefang Silver badge
            Coat

            Re: embargoes

            "Accidentally deleted original post, here it is for reference."

            And here I was thinking it had been retroactively embargoed.

        2. diodesign (Written by Reg staff) Silver badge

          Re: sanmigueelbeer

          The Meltdown + Spectre stuff was kinda weird. We saw big changes to the Linux kernel for what otherwise was billed as a KASLR bypass. It didn't make much sense. A well-placed source confirmed the Windows kernel was undergoing similar changes. Then an AMD engineer referenced a speculative execution bug.

          Then all the pieces fit together. It helped that some of us had written low-level MMU code. We were, back in the day, in the trenches battling firmware and kernel bugs, and knew the upcoming changes pointed to a microprocessor architecture flaw that derailed the assurances of the CPU memory access protection circuitry.

          So we contacted Intel, Microsoft and others for comment ahead of time. Everyone stonewalled us. So, welp, might as well let the world know Linux + Windows kernels were undergoing massive changes internally due to an apparent chipset flaw. The rest is history.

          FWIW Intel has now hired an external PR firm to handle El Reg. And they are professional, former wire reporters, and push to get our questions answered, which is appreciated.

          C.

          1. heyrick Silver badge

            Re: sanmigueelbeer

            "FWIW Intel has now hired an external PR firm to handle El Reg."

            Just to handle El Reg, or to do all the PR stuff they do obviously suck at? [which would be weird as Intel is hardly a baby startup]

          2. sanmigueelbeer Silver badge

            Re: sanmigueelbeer

            Hey, don't get me wrong. I didn't mean to throw a dirty finger at ElReg.

            I didn't know the "politics" that went around but I sure appreciate the fact that the "expose" sent everyone (outside ElReg) panicking and exposed some terrible secrets about Intel.

            Intel has now hired an external PR firm to handle El Reg.

            I'd consider that as a compliment. If that was Apple, you'd be talking to an army of lawyers who's first be examining the writer's prostate.

          3. GrumpenKraut Silver badge
            Thumb Up

            Re: sanmigueelbeer

            @diodesign: Thanks for those explanations!

            And that...

            > It helped that some of us had written low-level MMU code.

            ...that really made me smile!

    3. Dan 55 Silver badge

      Nobody in the UK would have found out if UK sports rag "journos" had refrained from shaking their fists at someone from the other side of the continent who couldn't give two fucks about their precious embargoed quote.

      The last link is doubly funny considering who they both work for.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Apple is Trumps model

    When dealing with the press. I think he's even said so.

  9. whatsyourShtoile
    Trollface

    arrest me

    leak #1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3iHV0NvLPI

  10. SVV Silver badge

    And those who break the 10 iCommandments.....

    Will burn in HELL, I tell you .In Holy Jobs name they will burn in HELL!

  11. JeffyPoooh Silver badge
    Pint

    "...an employee leaked a link to the gold master of iOS 11..."

    A "link" ? Seriously ?

    If you've left your "gold master" on a publicly accessible server, "secured" behind a "secret" link, then you're an idiot.

    It's the IP / Trade Secret equivalent of leaving the key under the mat.

    Geezuz H. Are they really that stupid?

    1. Voland's right hand Silver badge

      Re: "...an employee leaked a link to the gold master of iOS 11..."

      Geezuz H. Are they really that stupid?

      As far as Apple is concerned even the fact that there is now a Gold Master and the iOS 11 is ready for shipment is classified information.

      The only other place where I have seen that much stuff "classified" was USSR.

      1. TRT Silver badge

        Re: "...an employee leaked a link to the gold master of iOS 11..."

        Security by obscurity is not security. But it makes a wonderful headline, piques interest and curiosity, generates a buzz... what IS it that's so secret that it'll mean commercial ruin if it leaks out? It's the Holy Grail... the gaudy cup of anticipation rather than the carpenter's crudely carved beaker. They know exactly what they are doing.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Please explain what is "illegal" about leaking, and how Apple can have people arrested?

    Worst they could do is sack their employee..

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Please explain what is "illegal" about leaking

      A non-disclosure clause in the contract of employment, perhaps?

      Though in most regions, that would be a civil infringment.

  13. Mr Dogshit

    Cult or what?

    Has more than a whiff of Jim Jones about it.

  14. Duncan Macdonald Silver badge
    Mushroom

    First Amendment ?

    Leaks to the press are classified as speech and as such are protected by the First Amendment.

    The only "arrest" that Apple could legally do is to get company security to escort the person off company property.

    They might have a breach of contract case against a person who leaks to the press but that is a civil action with no right of arrest.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Insider trading

    Look at it this way.

    If I know a new wonder product is going to be launched and when, I then buy shares in the company and leak the announcement early. Shares bounce up in price based on the leak, I sell for a nice profit.

    Pretty sure that is called insider trading and is certainly not free speech.

    Likewise if you are in possession of bad news then you can short the shares to make a profit.

    Anything else leaking can be covered by a NDA which most companies will make employees sign.

    1. Pascal Monett Silver badge

      Re: Insider trading

      That may be valid for Apple employees who have stock and leak, but I doubt that all Apple employees have stock and I am almost certain that not all leakers have stock, so your point does not apply to all cases.

      Apple employees who leak and have no stock can be fired, but that is the extent of the actions Apple is legally entitled to.

      Of course, there is the hint that Apple employs people to specifically destroy a leaker's career, probably by phoning up all tech companies and loudly stating the horrible, treacherous person the ex-employee is, maybe even by polishing the story a bit (but not too much, because defamation lawsuit). Apple really has a Stasi mentality.

      Despicable.

      1. Steve 129

        Re: Insider trading

        Obviously you don't know how insider trading laws work.

        You don't have to personally gain from the information to be guilty of insider trading. Let your mum know something and she buys stock and you will both be guilty.

        And, believe it or not, more than Apple employees own stock !!!

        Everyone so far seems to be completely ignoring the (il)legality or breaching NDAs. Just because it is Apple doesn't mean they can't protect their IP, regardless of what you think

  16. heyrick Silver badge

    Wait, this is news?

    If everything doesn't go exactly as planned down to the most meticulous detail then we're gonna throw an epic hissy fit!

    Sounds about normal, doesn't it? But dues to the person that had the gonads to leak the do-not-leak missive.

  17. sanmigueelbeer Silver badge

    Leaks to the press are classified as speech and as such are protected by the First Amendment.

    This is Apple we're talking about. They've got an army of high-priced lawyers and regiment of PR that can convince the world that Chicken Little is a whale killer for sport.

    Geezuz H. Are they really that stupid?

    Stupid is putting the file up in server which can be publicly accessible & without authentication. Oh, wait ...

    1. Steve 129

      "Leaks to the press are classified as speech" Huhhh !!! What planet are you on !!???

      If I break into your house and steal your bank details and release them to the press I am covered by free speech ??!???

      Sheesh !!

  18. JuJuBalt

    Has it only just dawned on people that the 1984 advert was a sign of things to come in the shape of Apple.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      JJB noted that Apple's 1984 Ad was actually foretelling Apple 2018

      Wiki: The commercial opens with a dystopic, industrial setting in blue and grayish tones, showing a line of people (of ambiguous gender) marching in unison...,

      ...willingly lining up to pay for the latest tracking and monitoring device.

      Well spotted.

    2. anoncow

      A *black* Apple for the logo pretty much sums up the corporate culture. Anybody in their right mind going to bite on that?

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    it’s important to remember that you’re getting played

    well, even as apple-hater (to the core) I can't disagree with the apple-ectic observation. It's all about getting played in the world of journalism, here witnessed by the perpetuum mobile of apple-hatism, nicely stoked, in between the latest drop of google-is-evilism and MS-lashing, which they cheerfully provide on a daily basis. Pefect click bait every day. So... glass houses, you know.

  20. Voyna i Mor Silver badge

    Cast iron guarantee

    If I come by unreleased information on a new Apple product I promise to leave it precisely where I found it and say nothing. There are better things to do in life than be rendered to Gitmo for revealing the Pantone number of the next iPhone.

    Oh, sorry, did I just reveal it's painted?

    1. sanmigueelbeer Silver badge

      Re: Cast iron guarantee

      There are better things to do in life than be rendered to Gitmo for revealing the Pantone number of the next iPhone.

      Don't be silly! If you get caught, Apple ain't going to send you to Gitmo.

      Instead, they'll send you to North Korea where f@t b0y is going to execute you with a ZSU-23-4 for Friday afternoon amusement.

      1. TRT Silver badge

        Re: Cast iron guarantee

        You will wear a flak jacket made of fully charged lithium batteries taken from Apple products, whilst being dunked into a tank of water. Every 10 minutes you will be removed from the tank and shot at with 200 rounds from an airsoft gun. After two hours of this, we will switch to an air rifle.

    2. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Pantone numbers

      A company, not Apple btw, was sued over releasing the Pantone numbers for the finish of their device. Apparently, you have to pay Pantone money in order to use them publicly or for commercial purposes.

      I just blame the lawyers. There are so many Law grads in the USA now that many have nothing better to do to fend off unemployment.

      Paric simply because she needs one (A lawyer that is...) more than most.

      1. TRT Silver badge

        Re: Pantone numbers

        Not because Paris is coloured PANTONE 16-1448 TPX?

  21. Teiwaz Silver badge

    Opportunity...

    Perhaps a partnership with the Church of Scientology for apple inc.?

  22. Will Godfrey Silver badge
    Unhappy

    Talk about childish

    They really are the poster child (sorry) for the bad tempered little brat that wrecks the joint if they can't get their way.

    1. Steve 129

      Re: Talk about childish

      Or... a high tech company that is working on many products that it doesn't want the competition to get wind of!!??

      What is with everyone being so blinkered to think that, just because it is Apple, they should let the world+dog know any details about their business model/strategies/technologies or anything else they choose not to make public.

      Imagine they decided to move to a processor running at 20GHz and Samsung found out before release and decided to change their strategy based on this information. They are called trade secrets. When you start working for a company you sign agreements you won't let out those secrets. If you do, then you are in breach of contract. EVERY company has a clause like that in their employment contract. Go check yours... It will be there.

  23. GIRZiM Bronze badge
    Trollface

    Apple has gone full swivel-eyed, control-freak crazy on its own employees with a demented internal memo decrying information leaks.

    You're new to this, aren't you?

    CrApple has long been the Stepford of the tech sector.

    "These people not only lose their jobs, they can face extreme difficulty finding employment elsewhere," the letter rants.

    So, CrApple admits to engaging in the illegal practice of 'blackballing' people, does it?

    What a lovely company.

    You really are new to this, aren't you? ; )

  24. Rainer

    I'm not sure what the problem really is

    I work in a 60-odd employees company and what little and inconsequential pieces of news we produce, the boss doesn't to want to leak to the press ahead of time.

    If anybody would do that, it would certainly be a bad day for the person if the leak could be pinpointed to a specific individual.

    In a company the size of Apple (both in number of employees and profit), the stakes are much higher.

    Leaking is, in the end, a very egoistical thing: you get to feel special and relevant, for five minutes, but it doesn't really help anybody else. Especially not at the company that pays you money for not leaking.

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Reminds me of the memo inside Disney banning staff from referring to the place as "Mauschvitz", which prompted the immediate adoption of "Duckchau".

  26. Louis Schreurs BEng

    murrican reporter

    please act or better write like you know you are publishing on a UK based platform, or at least like the world is your audience

    The Fourth Estate

    does that even have any meaning outside the bigliest cunt ry in the wurreld

    or am I that big of an ignamorus

    anyways, The Fourth Estate isn't even an unambiguous phrase

    1. Voyna i Mor Silver badge

      Re: murrican reporter - Fourth Estate

      "does that even have any meaning outside the bigliest cunt ry in the wurreld"

      I'm pretty sure my English teacher at the time referred to the Press as the Fourth Estate. In the 1960s in North London. (She wasn't terribly keen on it.)

      In fact now I check it's attributed to Edmund Burke in 1787. At the time, of course, the French parliament - which was the subject of considerable international interest - was divided into three estates: Clergy, nobility, and the rest of us.

      So it's not even American.

  27. Cynicalmark
    Facepalm

    I wonder...

    Did they take a copy of this memo out on iPaper? Maybe they printed it on an iPrinter, or wrote it out with an iPencil.

    I do believe they sent an iWarning to all iDrones. No wonder the poor fools are trying to kill themselves by running into iGlass doors

  28. Spoonguard
    Terminator

    Did Apple did respond to a request for comment?

    1. Woza
      Joke

      They wrote out a response, but it was classified... we'll have to wait until it's leaked.

  29. tempemeaty
    WTF?

    Nice message to the workers.

    I'm glad I don't work at that company.

  30. mark l 2 Silver badge

    So Apple don't want their employees to leak about all the wonderful innovations they have come out with recently, such as animated poo emojis, bricking phones that have 3rd party screens installed and secretly slowing down your phones without telling you.

  31. trisul

    Completely normal

    In their place, I would do the same .... and I have never been to China.

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Strange sales technique

    " ...it launches them and tries to sell as many as humanely possible."

    Are you sure you don't mean humanly possible ? Admittedly there is room for doubt as it would take torture for me to pay their prices , but even so I think we would have heard if there sales technique was approaching this level. Perhaps that something else they don't want revealed.

  33. jwa

    One law for the

    Apple and other tech companies were stealing multiple millions from their employees by operating a hiring cartel, can someone remind how many executives went to jail.

  34. mhenriday
    Boffin

    It's always the fault of those nasty Others

    Doing China's bidding seems to have rubbed off on Cupertino
    Love the whinging which seems to be the USA's primary export product these days ! If the right person doesn't win the office of US president, it's all the fault of those dastardly Russians, while not only the US trade deficit, but the fact that a US corporation like Apple threatens leakers with «jail time and massive fines», is the fault of those equally dastardly (but rather more profitable) Chinese....

    The late US president Harry S Truman used to say that «the buck stops here», but as Leslie Poles Hartley famously observed : «The past is a foreign country ; they do things differently there». Things have changed in the US....

    Henri

  35. one crazy media

    Another View

    I don't know about the UK but in the US, every employee must sign an intellectual property right and a confidentiality agreement as part of the employment contract.

    So, anyone leaking confidential information is breaking a contract and breaking the law.

    In today's tech world, IP is more important than ever. It is time to single out leaches and leakers and punish them to the full extent of the law.

    1. Korev Silver badge

      Re: Another View

      In the UK it'd be a "Civil" matter so the Cops wouldn't get involved*, but you'd get your behind sued off in count.

      *I assume that this would be different for someone working for BAE Systems etc. working on Defence contracts

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Another View

        You would need to sign a set of UK Government documents, depending on the level of the secrecy level

        of the work you would do for HMG at B _ _ or any other weapon contractor etc. These are separate to the employer's commercial confidentiality documents. The hassle before employment as single person or contractor takes many months. You are well aware of punishment (criminal court and jail etc) for default.

        PS The Official Secrets Act documents are signed and resigned many times as stages of contract progresses.

    2. David Nash Silver badge

      Re: Another View

      "breaking the law."

      The law? or just the contract?

  36. JammyGit

    Apple needs secrets to generate fake hype. High end Androids can do far more than any Apple phone.

  37. IGnatius T Foobar ✅

    Mr. Daisey and the Apple Factory

    These are the antics which prove that the events described in "Mr. Daisey and the Apple Factory" really did take place. The "retraction" was obviously issued under duress, under threat of mega-lawsuit from Cupertino.

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