back to article Android P will hear no evil, see no evil, support evil notches

Google's revealed the stuff it's added to the next version of Android, which for now is known only as "P" while the world waits for it to earn a confectionery-related name.* To The Register's mind, the most interesting bits relate to security, as Google's decided that "Android P restricts access to mic, camera, and all …

  1. Barry Rueger Silver badge

    Pistachio

    OK, not candy, but.....

    1. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

      Pocky

      One for the weebs

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Popsicle, Piss or Poo

        I demand we be told why Popsicle, Piss and Poo weren't on the ballot :-/

        1. caffeine addict Silver badge

          Re: Popsicle, Piss or Poo

          If you consider poo (even properly candied poo) a confectionery item, you might want to see the doctor. Just don't breathe on him.

          Alternatively, you could become famous by remaking a famous video.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Popsicle, Piss or Poo

            @caffeine addict; "If you consider poo a confectionery item, you might want to see the doctor."

            Or vet. On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog until you inadvertently give away your unpleasant dietary habits.

        2. Tigra 07 Silver badge

          Re: Popsicle, Piss or Poo

          Penis?

      2. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge

        Re: Pocky

        Pork Scratchings?

        1. Chemical Bob

          Re: Pocky

          Pickled Turkey Gizzard!

          And, yes, they are meat candy.

      3. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. RobThBay

      Re: Pistachio

      Pistachio was the first thing I thought of.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Pistachio

      "Pacers"- the logo is already peppermint-striped.

    4. Ken Hagan Gold badge

      Re: Peppermint

      ...because Peanuts

    5. viscount

      Re: Pistachio

      If it's not Pecan Pie I'm switching to Apple.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    OK, Google, Give me the option

    to disable and uninstall any bloody app I feel I don't need. God, how I hate those grayed disable buttons!

    1. Dr Mantis Toboggan
      FAIL

      Re: OK, Google, Give me the option

      Ironically, if you buy a Google phone you don't have this problem.... Perhaps you should ask bigsby or whatever his name is..

  3. Phil Kingston Silver badge

    Parma Violets

    After all, who doesn't love the taste of soap.

  4. Lt.Kije

    To The Register's mind,

    "To The Register's mind..."

    And here was I thinking El Reg was an undifferentiated bundle of nerve endings optimized for Pavlovian knee jerks.

  5. G Mac

    Profiterole

    Mmmmm...

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    version - Android Pr0n

  7. James O'Shea Silver badge
    Childcatcher

    Vladimir says...

    Pinkie Pie!

    Just think of all the bronies (and Russians!) who will be attracted!

    https://davidswatling.files.wordpress.com/2013/04/my-little-putin.jpg

    http://static.mmzstatic.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/My-Little-Pony-Friendship-is-Magic.jpg

    Thinking of the children...

  8. MacroRodent Silver badge

    Pris

    - The memorable android character in "Blade Runner", played by Daryl Hannah.

    (Why should it always be confectionery?)

    1. onefang Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: Pris

      Very yummy, I'd vote for that.

  9. Diogenes

    Parfait ?

    A delicious desert and almost the cheese eating surrender monkey word for perfect. Might get those froggies off the chocolate factory's back

    1. Diogenes

      Re: Parfait ?

      But i voted for polly waffle (use your favourite search engine image search) as that is what will be closer to

  10. Inventor of the Marmite Laser Silver badge

    Parkin

    Mmmmm

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Parkin

      I'll raise you "Pontefract cake".

      Sadly all those bearded hipsters at Mountain View won't have heard of either.

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: Parkin

        I'll raise you "Pontefract cake".

        Sadly all those bearded hipsters at Mountain View won't have heard of either.

        I must admit to being surprised as a young kid to find that Pontefract was in Yorkshire and not Wales.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    They'll release it last month and call it Paradox.

  12. Francis Boyle Silver badge

    Polly Waffle

    Is not to be sniffed at, but if you were going for an Australian option it should have been pavlova. (Kiwis may disagree, though.)

  13. russsh

    Paddle Pop

    Introducing a new form factor with built-in mini selfie stick

  14. G2

    Peppermint

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peppermint

    :D

  15. Chris Miller

    Polo

    To a USian is a type of shirt - they have Life Savers for mints.

  16. Elmer Phud Silver badge

    name?

    Back to basics with Androiod?

    Phonie Mc Phone Phace

  17. Dan 55 Silver badge
    Big Brother

    "Simultaneous use of multiple cameras at once"

    Any phone with hardware which can do that already has the Camera app to do that. What they mean is Play Services slurping the precious images.

    1. Charlie Clark Silver badge

      Re: "Simultaneous use of multiple cameras at once"

      Sounds more like a chat / WebRTC extension so that you can both see the person you're talking to and what they're looking at.

  18. goldcd

    Penguin

    (~Tim Tam for the criminal colonials, no idea if the US has equivalent)

  19. Blacklight
    Black Helicopters

    Panopticon

    For sweet, sweet omniscient surveillance....

  20. Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

    Plaatkoekie (Afrikaans for flapjacks)

  21. Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
    Trollface

    Nah, it'll be renamed Pr*ck by some joker :)

  22. Charlie Clark Silver badge

    while the world waits for it to earn a confectionery-related name

    It isn't you know. I suspect we'll increasingly see references to major.minor.patch versions instead of the marketing friendly launch name.

    1. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

      Re: while the world waits for it to earn a confectionery-related name

      see references to major.minor.patch

      I never understood their logic for going for a major version number bump every year - to me it doesn't look like there are enough significant changes for that.

      Likewise for iOS. Adding a few emoticons and tweaking how the notifications work isn't really a major change..

  23. Mycho Silver badge

    Pork pie

    It really should be reclassified as a confection.

  24. Aladdin Sane Silver badge

    Absolute dog's dinner

    Pedigree?

  25. Anonymous Custard Silver badge
    Trollface

    Polo Mint

    Well they are allowing notches, so why not holes?

    1. Jedit

      Re: Polo Mint

      The chief selling point of Android P is that it closes holes, not opens them.

      I think it'll just be Peanut Butter, no cups.

  26. handleoclast Silver badge
    Coat

    Priapus

    Suck on this...

  27. VinceH Silver badge
    Joke

    "Google's decided that "Android P restricts access to mic, camera, and all SensorManager sensors from apps that are idle." This change has been made to stop apps snooping, which is hard to argue against!"

    Third party apps, you mean. Will they apply the restriction to their own stuff?

    "Indoor positioning over WiFi, thanks to support for 802.11mc, aka WiFi Round-Trip-Time (RTT)"

    Please allow this to be disabled. It'll give the police a clue as to which part of the basement to dig up to find the bodies. I spent more time on those spots to dig the holes, etc.

  28. Sartori

    Priscilla

    Queen Of The Dessert? That's a confectionary, right?

  29. Trumpet Winsock

    Perhaps

    Android Perhaps coming to a Samsung Galaxy one day...

    ( Galaxy S7 still on Android 7.0 )

  30. Frederic Bloggs

    PinappleChunks

    Clearly it's time for some fresh fruit flavo(u)rs!

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    When will apple follow suit?

    Some nice security enhancements that should be running on my pixel2 by mid year, when will apple implement similar features I wonder. They are often 2+ years behind android in implementation.

    1. onefang Silver badge

      Re: When will apple follow suit?

      I'm thinking that in about a decades time, it will be time for the Android Apple Crumble OS. Or maybe Android Apple Pi.

  32. Chronos Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Popcorn

    It won't be popcorn, that I can guarantee you. With the prevalence of "fully loaded" Android boxes for streaming pirated content, one of which uses that word along with the connotations associated with the consumption of said buttery comestible, if the land sharks at Alphabet let it through with that name they're not doing their bloody jobs properly.

  33. JeffyPoooh Silver badge
    Pint

    Pomegranate

    Does it have to be a confectionery?

  34. Overflowing Stack

    No preview for the Pixel C!

    Buggers!

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Pussy

    Obviously

  36. ThreadGuy

    Department of Redundancy Department

    Wow - not only "simultaneous use of multiple cameras", nor even just "use of multiple cameras at once", but the full-blown "simultaneous use of multiple cameras at once"!

  37. Gene Cash Silver badge

    Nooooo Android P 4 J00!

    Turns out that the old Nexus phones (like my 6P, etc) and the Pixel C tablet won't get it.

    Nice.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Nooooo Android P 4 J00!

      Turns out that the old Nexus phones (like my 6P, etc) and the Pixel C tablet won't get it.

      And you thought they would? You should have bought a Microsoft phone, they're good for.....oh, maybe not.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Nooooo Android P 4 J00!

      The pixel c still gets security updates, so I'm not really fussed, its not likenypu aren't going to be able to run all the latest stuff...

  38. Ugotta B. Kiddingme

    Peeps

    marshmallow chicks known here in the former colonies as Peeps

  39. inmypjs Silver badge

    "enable encryption of Android backups with a client-side secret."

    Wow, Google say they have stopped reading your (g)mails. Now they say you won't have to let them read the entire contents of your phone to use the built in backup.

    Guess they must think they already know everything about everyone.

  40. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
    Coat

    When they get to version T

    ...they could go with Toffee Apple, just for annoyance value.

  41. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

    Pococurante

    Because 95% of Android device owners have devices that will never run it.

  42. Bugfix

    Putin

    Because Google behaves arrogant like him.

  43. Duffy Moon

    Peppermint Patty

    Although I don't know if they have versions with more than one word.

  44. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Lovely bit of omission here..

    as Google's decided that "Android P restricts access to mic, camera, and all SensorManager sensors from apps that are idle." This change has been made to stop apps snooping, which is hard to argue against!

    Yes, APPS snooping. Any word on hot it restricts Google itself? That has always been my main worry about Android. I may haven mentioned this before, but I actually READ what a Samsung S8 is asking a user to agree to before it becomes anywhere near usable (basically it amounts to allowing AND Google, AND Samsung AND Microsoft to grab whatever they like from your data) and IMHO it ought not even be sold in Europe with those demands.

  45. davidp231

    Pants.. because the only devices that will actually see it will have to have been manufactured in July 2017 or newer.

  46. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What I really want is for Android to stop...

    ... sending all my personal data back to Google HQ.

    S for Secret would be good.

  47. Timmy B Silver badge

    (Fry's) Peppermint Cream....

    Now I want one......

  48. Timmy B Silver badge
    Trollface

    Prole

    'cause that's who the Appleites think use Android....

  49. phord

    Pixie Sticks

    Pistachio

    Peanut Brittle (not advised)

  50. Carl Pearson

    Playful Praline

  51. Rarely Posts

    Another one...

    Keeping to the sweets theme but expressing similar sentiments to earlier postings:

    Pip

    (https://www.aquarterof.co.uk/hard-boiled-pips.html)

    Almost as small as the number of devices that will get it...

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