back to article It's been 50 years since those damn dirty apes took the planet by storm

On a cold, dry evening of February 9, 1968, cinemagoers at New York's venerable Capitol Theatre were the first members of the public to be taken to a new but worryingly familiar world. Ahead of the film's nationwide April opening, patrons of the picture palace at 1645 Broadway half a century ago caught an early glimpse of the …

  1. This post has been deleted by its author

    1. Graham Dawson

      Re: Only a Moran or a Monkey could have written that....

      It's 50 years to the day since the film first screened. What's odd about that timing?

  2. Zog_but_not_the_first Silver badge
    Megaphone

    "Get your stinking paws off me..."

    "...you dam dirty ape!"

    Is a phrase I like to use whenever I can.

    1. Aladdin Sane Silver badge

      Re: "Get your stinking paws off me..."

      Me too, but the missus says it spoils the mood.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: "Get your stinking paws off me..."

      "Is a phrase I like to use whenever I can."

      Well there is sure no shortage of opportunities these days!

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: "Get your stinking paws off me..."

        "Well there is sure no shortage of opportunities these days!"

        Careful, you might melt a few snowflakes with talk like that!

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: "Get your stinking paws off me..."

      "...you dam dirty ape!"

      Can't help noticing a complete absence of Bonobos in all of the Planet of the Apes films, but istr that PotA had a restricted certification (an 'A' cert in the UK at the time) anyway and I guess that typical Bonobo behavior would have raised the cert to an 'X'.

  3. Chris G Silver badge

    Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

    Hmm that explains the orange hair then, Orangutan!

    1. fandom Silver badge

      Re: Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

      Now that you mention it, the way political nuts like you exchange insults does remind me of apes throwing shit at each other.

      1. Chris G Silver badge

        Re: Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

        I'm not too sure I'm a poitical nut, I despise all politicians equally, they are right up there with relgions.

        Both are only really interested in owning you.

        1. fandom Silver badge

          Re: Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

          "I'm not too sure I'm a poitical nut,"

          You bring political shit into a completely unrelated thread and you are still not sure?

          Actually, I don't know why I am bothering to act surprised, it's not like self awareness is something political nuts excel at.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

            I think you wrong Chris. I skimmed thru a page of his recent posts and found virtually no mentions of politicians at all. Just this one orange orangutan thing, and that's pretty elliptic. Maybe he's just having an off day.

          2. albaleo

            Re: Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

            You bring political shit into a completely unrelated thread

            Only if you think politicians are related to politics. It's debatable.

          3. ecofeco Silver badge

            Re: Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

            You bring political shit into a completely unrelated thread and you are still not sure?

            Well the core story of the movie was that, wait for it... politicians blew up the world.

            And there was political conflict among the monkeys.

            Or have you not seen the actual movie?

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

              The core of the original text story was the question of what exactly constitutes and identifies a 'person,' rather than an animal.

              Recall the big inquisition of Taylor by the ape tribunal in the movie. I find it amazing that Hollywood allowed even THAT much of the original story theme to survive the cinematic process. And it's the only movie scene that lifts such dreck above the level of mindless fun. I guess they knew they'd have a joke movie without it...

    2. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

      Re: Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

      Hmm that explains the orange hair then, Orangutan!

      The Librarian is not amused. Expect a visit from The Librarian shortly.

  4. Rameses Niblick the Third Kerplunk Kerplunk Whoops Where's My Thribble? Silver badge

    My favourite spoof is still in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back:

    " And only those who outwit those damn dirty apes will ever remember that it was man who once ruled the earth! YOU MANIACS! DAMN YOUSE!!! GODDAMN YOUSE ALL TO HELL!!!

    And so on.

    Gotta love Kevin Smith movies.

    1. Rafael #872397
      Happy

      Spoof

      Aw, come ON!

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yOeUXEpxzcc

  5. Neil 44

    I'll just leave this here...

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=beCYGm1vMJ0

    for those that remember Gerald

    :)

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Sir Runcible Spoon Silver badge
      Paris Hilton

      Re: I'll just leave this here...

      Is that the 'Wild? I was absolutely livid!' Gerald of NtNON fame?

      Can't watch it from work.

      1. Not also known as SC

        Re: I'll just leave this here...

        That's the one.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I'll just leave this here...

      Is it just me and my permanent private browsing, or is youtube and pretty much every other Gurgle product aside from search itself, slow and clunky to the point that you seriously wonder if that's the same company that runs the most visited site on the web?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: I'll just leave this here...

        > or is youtube and pretty much every other Gurgle product aside from search itself, slow and clunky

        Not to mention that three clicks later you end up in some conspiracy theory video or another (but let's blame the Russians, you know).

  6. jake Silver badge

    The Varsity, Palo Alto, 3PM, July 17th 1969.

    That's the place, time and date I first saw TPotA. How do I remember? Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin and Michael Collins had taken a huge leap for mankind the day before ... and 3PM shows mid-week were 30 cents that summer.

    I thought the movie was hogwash. Still do. Apollo still fascinates me.

    1. ecofeco Silver badge

      Re: The Varsity, Palo Alto, 3PM, July 17th 1969.

      The movie was never meant to be more than a matinée fare with a (then) current events relevant message.

      Cheap moralizing I believe it is called with a twist ending.

      In that form, it worked. The sequels sucked, but I have not seen the latest one.

  7. Sandtitz Silver badge
    Happy

    "...unsettling sight of Helena Bonham Carter costumed as unsettlingly attractive chimp"

    "Did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he put on a dress and play girl bunny?"

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Mrs Burton always gets a prominent part acting in Mr Burton's fantasies.

    2. Pedigree-Pete
      Paris Hilton

      Bugs Bunny girl...

      @Santitz. No, but Jessica Rabbit is another story entirely. PP

      1. Sir Runcible Spoon Silver badge

        Re: Bugs Bunny girl...

        And not forgetting Kim Basinger when she was cartoonified in Cool World.

        It's amazing how well that film hasn't aged* :P

        *Brad Pitt looks like he just left infant school, whereas these days he looks like he's had 150 years sucked out of him by 'The Machine' in Princess Bride.

      2. Ugotta B. Kiddingme

        Re: @ Pedigree-Pete

        Jessica Rabbit had one of the best ever one-liners:

        "I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way."

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "Did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he put on a dress and play girl bunny?"

      Or Bruce Jenner?

      1. ecofeco Silver badge

        Am I bad for laughing at this?

  8. Prst. V.Jeltz Silver badge

    I didnt realise the recent slurry of apes movies were unconnected to the Wallberg one of a few years ago.

  9. Blotto Bronze badge
    Facepalm

    The most recent Planet if the Apes was utter garbage

    I really liked the original, saw the Wahlberg one at the London premiere.

    I’m not too keen on the newer reboots, the originals had the premise that the apes evolved, now where told they came about due to human meddling. I Preferred the evolution angle.

    The most recent movie was utter tosh though. Like Star Wars, the media reviewers loved it and raved about it, the overwhelming majority of the paying viewing public where not as generous.

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3450958/reviews?ref_=tt_urv

    I personally hated it and am saddened by what they’ve done to the franchise.

    I really want a return to gritty passionate sci-fi as good as WoK, alien, Star Wars iv, silent runnings, moon, love, predator, gattaca etc.

    1. Professor Clifton Shallot

      Re: The most recent Planet if the Apes was utter garbage

      "I really want a return to gritty passionate sci-fi as good as WoK, alien, Star Wars iv, silent runnings, moon, love, predator, gattaca etc."

      I watched Silent Running for the first time in at least 20 years. Worth it, even if it's really not as good as I had (mis)remembered, with some over-caffeinated acting, and not enough story; the design is still terrific though.

      What's WoK? (I'm prepared to be embarrassed at my brain fade here . . .)

      1. Sir Runcible Spoon Silver badge

        Re: The most recent Planet if the Apes was utter garbage

        I'm gonna guess at Wrath of Khan here.

        1. Professor Clifton Shallot

          Re: The most recent Planet if the Apes was utter garbage

          Ah, got you. Thanks.

          On that note am I alone in thinking that the first Star Trek film was pretty good - I haven't watched it since I was a kid but I remember really enjoying the premise.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Mushroom

    They keep remaking them but you can't beat the Chuck Heston versions.

    Bloody bastard......BOOM !

    In one of the countless billions of galaxies in the universe lies a medium sized star and one of it's satellites, a green and insignificant planet, is now dead.

  11. Paul Westerman
    Thumb Up

    I preferred the musical version

    starting Troy McClure

    1. Paul Westerman

      Re: I preferred the musical version

      * starring - sorry

    2. Roj Blake Silver badge

      Re: I preferred the musical version

      Help me Dr Zaius!

      1. defiler Silver badge

        Re: I preferred the musical version

        He can talk, he can talk, he can talk

        I can SING!!

  12. Dodgy Geezer Silver badge

    That's not bad going...

    ...The premise is that in 3978, many hundreds of years after a nuclear war destroyed human civilisation, our near-relatives, the great apes, underwent the same evolutionary leap that had taken our bloodline from forest-dwelling apes like Ardipithecus ramidus...

    A jump from Ardipithecus to Homo took around 2m years, and a jump from Homo Habilis to Sapiens took us another 2m. The Pan genus must have some pretty impressive mutagens to do a similar leap in 2k years....

    ...which picked up a handful of Oscars for makeup, costume and musical score...

    It was up against 2001 - A Space Odyssey. 2001 had incomparably better make-up/costume, including an accurate (for the time) tribe of Ardipithecus, and I presume that I don't need to remind you of the 2001 musical score. With shots of Jupiter 'on location' from the probes. And Planet of the Apes won...

    At the time Arthur Clarke said "Maybe they didn't give us the make-up prize because they thought we used real ape-men..."

    1. ArrZarr Silver badge

      Re: That's not bad going...

      As much as it pains me to say this, Accuracy doesn't necessarily correlate to movie quality. I do still think that 2001 is a better film than PotA and deserves more than it got.

      Also, 2k years + nuclear fallout. In the timeline of the movie, I've always just considered that the apes got lucky.

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: That's not bad going...

        "PotA "

        Y'know, every time someone writes out POTUS in these forms, I always read it as Planet Of The Apes :-)

        (Although I should say it started appearing with alarming regularity without explanation rather suddenly. A fast spreading meme for which I had to ask for an explanation.)

    2. Francis Boyle Silver badge

      Re: That's not bad going...

      Never did manage to convince my mother they weren't real apes in 2001.

  13. handleoclast Silver badge

    Homage, pastiche or parody?

    Whatever, this always makes me chuckle.

    1. ecofeco Silver badge

      Re: Homage, pastiche or parody?

      Why not all three! :)

  14. IsJustabloke Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    phew...

    "unsettling sight of Helena Bonham Carter costumed as unsettlingly attractive chimp"

    I found her strangely sexy as well and I thought it was just me....

    point of order though - Apes are not monkeys

    1. John G Imrie Silver badge
      Happy

      Apes are not monkeys

      Don't use the M word around the Librarian.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: phew...

      Nova dying at the beginning of the sequel, means the original is the only one I ever watch. Linda Harrison was gorgeous, and more than compensation for the destruction of the world as we knew it.

    3. handleoclast Silver badge

      Re: phew...

      point of order though - Apes are not monkeys

      Yes they are. In fact, yes we are.

      It's called cladistic taxonomy and it's all the rage these days.

      You are an ape. And a monkey. And a mammal. And a vertebrate. And a chordate (even though only as an embryo, it still counts). And a deuterosterome. And an animal. And many, many other things (those mentioned are merely interesting points along the way).

      In the earliest stages of embryonic development a ball of cells gastrulates: it forms a dimple, which grows into a pocket. Later, that pocket tunnels all the way to the other end, forming a doughnut shape. The central hole becomes the digestive system. In deuterostomes, like us, the dimple end becomes the anus. In protostomes the dimple end becomes the mouth. In case you were wondering, protostomes include arthropods (spiders and insects), nematodes, etc.

      For more details on why you're a monkey, see this.

  15. Garry Perez

    Interesting anectdote

    I heard that the ape make up was a pain to remove so was left on during breaks. What was noticed that all the gorillas, orangutans, chimps tended to aggregate together in their own groups.

    Love the original film BTW.

  16. Aladdin Sane Silver badge

    Spaceballs?

    Well, there goes the planet.

    1. Kubla Cant Silver badge

      Re: Spaceballs?

      Dark Star?

  17. Anonymous Cowerd
    Thumb Up

    Bridge on the River Kwai

    was also written by Pierre Boulle.

    Strange but true.

    1. RealBigAl

      Re: Bridge on the River Kwai

      They changed the original film ending of Alec Guinness screaming at the allied forces

      "YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP!"

      1. Kubla Cant Silver badge

        Re: Bridge on the River Kwai

        They changed the original film ending of Alec Guinness screaming at the allied forces

        Who did? When? I'm sure that was the ending when I saw it.

  18. graeme leggett

    The Book

    " The story is actually told from the perspective of sentient apes but we don't know that until the story ends"

    Now I'm sure I read the book when I was in my early teens but damned if I remember that. Perhaps I read Bridge on the River Kwai instead.

  19. graeme leggett

    Franchise size

    Original

    4 Sequels

    2 TV series

    reboot

    3 more films

    but no mention of the cartoon episode with the musical ?

    1. DropBear Silver badge

      Re: Franchise size

      I first encountered it as a comic strip. Didn't much like any of the other versions of it either. Sorry.

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    That lady crisps thing

    Please tell me that was also in 1968.

    1. Aladdin Sane Silver badge

      Re: That lady crisps thing

      If only

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: That lady crisps thing

        > If only

        Oh dear! An "article" by Twitter, complete with an "you may also like" and all.

        That's them past Buzzfeed depths by now. How much lower can they go?

  21. Donchik

    Travelling Wild West Show?

    Anyone remember the Wild Bill western show that did the rounds back in my youth, '70's I suspect.

    I saw this at the Essex county show ground and included a hefty Plant of the Apes section.

    From my recollection it was not that bad, and fitted in quite well with all the horse riding stunt stuff.

    My big sister was a great fan :)

    1. Highroads

      Re: Travelling Wild West Show?

      Yes, I remember something just like. I think I even have a photo of one of the gorillas. I found them scary at the time as a small child. Lots of shooting too.

  22. Roj Blake Silver badge

    Great Apes

    I think my favourite homage to Planet of the Apes is in Will Self's rather excellent novel Great Apes.

    It's about a bloke who wakes up one morning to find that everyone has been replaced by apes. In one scene, the apes take our hero to a screening of "Planet of the Humans" and he's not impressed as the humans in it are clearly just chimps wearing rubber masks.

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: Great Apes

      ****Spoilers ahead****

      I love the part where the chimp psychiatrists take the chimp protagonist to a human reservation in the mountains to seal his recovery from this delusion that he was ever a human. "Out of the mists could be heard the calls of the humans. 'Fuck off. Fuuuck off!' "

      *** End Spoilers ***

      And Mr Self write it before Twitter was a thing.

    2. OzBob

      Re: Great Apes

      Duty rumour was that NASA ground crew wanted to wear ape masks when John Glenn exited the shuttle on his second flight, fact or fiction?

  23. Christopher Lane
    Childcatcher

    I always found...

    ...First Born a little disturbing. A little too much interest in our DNA cousins.

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0096584/

  24. Tikimon Silver badge
    Headmaster

    Here's a point to consider - plausible aliens

    Space aliens in movies were kinda similar for a long time. Lots of humanoids (amazingly the same size and proportions as humans) or butt-ugly weird looking things meant to unsettle with their ALIENness.

    Planet of the Apes did something totally different by using a future Earth full of basically Earth creatures. For the first time, English-speaking humanoid aliens made total sense. The humanoids are plausible because they're our genetic cousins, they speak English because that was a dominant language from their past. For all its gee-wow, even Star Wars had no explanation for why the inhabitants of a far-away galaxy were basically human. In Planet of the Apes it all made sense for once.

  25. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

    Marvel comics Planet Of The Apes

    Now they took it much, much further and explored much more of the world of the Apes.

    Memories are fading now, but ISTR a scene with some apes (Gilbert the Gibbon?) living in Abraham Lincolns nose on Mt Rushmore. And some sort of huge wooden ship, crewed by ape pirates.

    Could this be a new TV show? Everyone and their auntie seems to be buying up Marvel and DC characters for TV series these days.

  26. Marketing Hack Silver badge
    Coat

    William Apespeare?

    Proof of the old canard that a roomful of chimpanzees with typewriters will eventually reproduce the works of William Shakespeare? Or perhaps just a way to profit off the Bard's intellectual property. We all know how literate the weekend morning cartoon crowd is....

    And the Tim Burton remake was kind of crap. Especially the end where Mark Wahlberg returns to Earth and finds out that somehow this ape general is now lionized there, even though the movie took place on another planet. It would have been a good ending if Wahlberg was unable to return to Earth and ended up back at the ape planet, only to find that the general (who had been disgraced before Wahlberg left) really had been proven right by time and his vision that apes and humans cannot co-exist as equals had been born out.

    (Mine's the ape suit on the hook by the door.)

  27. David Roberts Silver badge
    Unhappy

    The original lost me in the first few minutes.

    When they revealed that the mission was to populate a new world with three men and one woman.

    Completely the wrong way round; very much all your eggs in one basket. She arrived dead anyway.

    Presumably so they could focus on the manly crew doing manly things as they were killed off to leave one alpha male as the main protagonist. With no adverse reactions to apes killing (or otherwise mistreating) fine examples of American womanhood.

    Not a bad romp, though, and thoroughly enjoyable.

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: The original lost me in the first few minutes.

      An all-female crew, cryogenic storage and a turkey baster is a better way of colonising another world.

  28. Tezfair
    Coat

    Charlton Heston didn't have his vest on

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-xxju1pNhuA

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