back to article Jocks in shock as Irn-Bru set to slash sugar and girder content

Angry Scots are protesting against plans to slash the sugar content of their beloved national soft drink Irn-Bru and folk have begun stockpiling the beverage said to be a hangover cure. As of this month, Irn-Bru will be made with 50 per cent less sugar. Currently a can of has just under 140 calories, which will reduced to 65 …

  1. macjules Silver badge
    WTF?

    Is nothing sacred?

    Next, someone will be claiming that deep-fried Mars bars are bad for your health.

    1. Korev Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Is nothing sacred?

      If someone says that to you then you should batter them

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Is nothing sacred?

      "[...] will be claiming that deep-fried Mars bars are bad for your health."

      Not to mention the deep-fried mini-pizzas.

      1. Hans Neeson-Bumpsadese Silver badge

        Re: Is nothing sacred?

        Not to mention the deep-fried mini-pizzas.

        I think the most Scottish comestible I ever encountered was the deep-fried curry pie. Sadly, I was sober at the time I encountered it, so I don't really think I got the optimum experience.

        1. Pascal Monett Silver badge
          Trollface

          Re: Sadly, I was sober

          What ? You were in Scotland and you were sober ??

          What were you thinking, lad ?

        2. macjules Silver badge

          Re: Is nothing sacred?

          I don't think you are supposed to drink it when you are sober. It requires a balanced state of ongoing inebriation, recovery from a post-pub dinner of curried haggis and chips plus deep-fried Mars bar. Only then can you really appreciate it's potency.

          For everyone else, it is made from the sweetness of Scottish wild thistles, combined with a pinch of rust from the Forth bridge and the tears of England supporters who have just endured another thrashing at Murrayfield.

          1. Pedigree-Pete
            Thumb Up

            England supporters who have just endured another thrashing at Murrayfield.

            @macjules. Oooooh! fighting talk. Let's see. The Six Nations is coming up.

            Actually, Scotland are in great shape and I'm always torn when the Calcutta Cup kicks off. English born, some residency and education in Dumblane and Leith. PP

            PS: Post WW2 England won 47 ish Scotland 16. 8 Drawn.

      2. d3vy Silver badge

        Re: Is nothing sacred?

        "Not to mention the deep-fried mini-pizzas"

        Pizza crunch. Heathen.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Is nothing sacred?

      "Irn-Bru"

      Never heard of it. Doesn't exactly sound appealing.

      1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

        Re: Is nothing sacred?

        It's radioactive orange, sweet and brewed in Scotland (from girders). That's all you need to know about the stuff.

      2. handleoclast Silver badge

        Re: Is nothing sacred?

        @AC

        Never heard of it.

        They used to have good TV adverts. Good enough to make you try it once. Not good enough, in my mind, to make me drink the stuff a second time (too much vanilla in it for my taste).

        See, for example, this classic or this older advert. Or this more recent one (a bit close to the bone for some people).

        1. John Gamble
          Pint

          Re: Is nothing sacred?

          "Good enough to make you try it once. Not good enough, in my mind, to make me drink the stuff a second time (too much vanilla in it for my taste)."

          I've had a couple of cans (while in the U.S.!), and it was okay. To me it seemed to taste like a variant of cream soda, and if I liked cream soda more I might have had more.

          Come to think of it, it did seem overly sweet, so reducing the sugar content might be a good idea, although cutting it in half seems a little drastic. On the other hand, I was also sober at the time.

          1. Rob Daglish

            Re: Is nothing sacred? @John Gamble

            May I introduce you to the Soda-Pop then John? Take a half pint glass, add a measure of Tia Maria, a measure of Cointreau and a measure of Vodka. Top up with Dent Special Lemonade* and it tastes just like a cream soda. It gets you drunk from the feet up, because you feel fine until you try to stand up after the third one, but I've never yet had a hangover with it.

            *It's toxic waste yellow and fizzy. Other brands of Lemonade do not work. Picture of said lemonade: https://goo.gl/images/gHcYC4

          2. CommanderGalaxian

            Re: Is nothing sacred?

            "I've had a couple of cans (while in the U.S.!)"

            The U.S. version is different because AG Barr wouldn't disclose the recipe.

        2. Muscleguy Silver badge

          Re: Is nothing sacred?

          I like it and wishing a cold caffeine hit I will choose it instead of a cola. However I have not consumed a sugar laden soft drink in many years and cannot taste Aspartame so I'm a Scot who is not scunnered by this. So long as they don't touch the recipe for the diet version. Then It's taps aff and face paint on, pal.

          Just be very careful not to spill it on the soft furnishings, it stains. Our lounge room carpet is orangey pink. I strongly suspect this is why.

          I also applaud Barrs though I strongly suspect they are motivated more about their price point in advance of the sugar tax than any thought for the health of their consumers.

          The Biological reality is that sugar is a non necessary foodstuff. Outside of insulin dependent diabetics who get things wrong and the latter stages of marathons and the like (NOT halfs or anything shorter) it has no place in our diets. Alternatives are available. Soft drink consumption is not compulsory.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Sugar!!!

            > The Biological reality is that sugar is a non necessary foodstuff. Outside of insulin dependent diabetics who get things wrong and the latter stages of marathons and the like (NOT halfs or anything shorter)

            That (well, mountain running & mountaineering) is exactly what I stock my Bru for. Living outside Bighty it is not exactly easy to come by so I use it as a little reward after the first three hours (and after winter training runs), and that is PRECISELY because of the sugar.

            Except that now, in all their wisdom, governments are finding it fashionable to slap a tax on the sort of stuff that we endurance athletes quite legitimately use. May as well just switch to amphetamines, at least they're not taxed. :(

            And about as equally legal, the way things are going.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: May as well just switch to amphetamines

              There are no calories in speed.

        3. kindall

          Re: Is nothing sacred?

          Not to mention this one:

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9wMs5bUkjO0

        4. d3vy Silver badge

          Re: Is nothing sacred?

          @handleoclast

          Yer granny was a fanny.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Is nothing sacred?

      I imagine there will now be heavily slurred protests requesting money at top volume for "Bru" outside many London mainline railway stations...

    5. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Is nothing sacred?

      Only people that eat deep fried Mars Bars are stupid English tourists. We can sell you anything.

    6. CommanderGalaxian

      Re: Is nothing sacred?

      The local chippy does gluten free ones on a Monday.

  2. frank ly Silver badge

    Lateral Thinking

    Can't the 'traditionalists' just add a teaspoon of sugar to it when they open it? I suspect that 'Irn-Bru Classic' will be on sale in the summer.

    1. Steven Raith

      Re: Lateral Thinking

      People said the same thing about Lucozade, but they still haven't done it.

      It started as a suggestion, then it was a voluntary thing, and now it's 'if you don't drop most of the sugar from your sugary drink, you'll be paying an extra tax per 100ml'.

      Because according to some people*, sugar is the new tobacco.

      Steven R

      *neo-puritan fuckwits

      1. AMBxx Silver badge

        Re: Lateral Thinking

        A little sachet of sugar taped to the outside of the bottle should do the trick.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Lateral Thinking

          Superb idea. Add the sugar if you want. Like Smith's 'Salt and Shake' crisps. Except more glucose-ey.

        2. JimC Silver badge

          Re: sachet of sugar... do the trick.

          Not if they've replaced the sugar with some godawful artificial sweetener.

          1. Dan 55 Silver badge

            Re: sachet of sugar... do the trick.

            It'll be fun when the government eventually realise artificial sweeter is linked to dementia.

            1. TheVogon Silver badge

              Re: sachet of sugar... do the trick.

              "It'll be fun when the government eventually realise artificial sweeter is linked to dementia."

              Correlation does not equal causation. See http://www.tylervigen.com/spurious-correlations

            2. hplasm Silver badge
              Devil

              Re: sachet of sugar... do the trick.

              "It'll be fun when the government eventually realise artificial sweeter is linked to dementia."

              Yep. They won't like the competition for their jobs, that's for sure.

            3. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

              Re: sachet of sugar... do the trick.

              It'll be fun when the government eventually realise artificial sweeter is linked to dementia

              Which artifical sweetener? There are hundreds in use today.. (and very few people use saccarin nowadays).

              1. CommanderGalaxian

                Re: sachet of sugar... do the trick.

                "Which artifical sweetener?"

                AGBarr have chosen aspartame.

            4. CommanderGalaxian

              Re: sachet of sugar... do the trick.

              "It'll be fun when the government eventually realise artificial sweeter is linked to dementia...."

              Thankfully artificial sweetners have never been fingered as a cause in the increase of diabetes cases...oh wait...

              https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg22329872-600-artificial-sweeteners-linked-to-glucose-intolerance/

          2. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

            Re: sachet of sugar... do the trick.

            some godawful artificial sweetener

            What - like xylitol? (Oooh - it's an 'ol', it must be artificial and really, really bad for you[1]!).

            First made from boiling down birch bark when the Scandanavians couldn't get sugar during WW2.

            [1] Well - it is bad for you if you are a dog. In humans it causes virtually no insulin-response. In canines, it produces a very large insulin response - enough to send the dog into a fatal diabetic coma. Which is why we don't use it any more..

            1. CommanderGalaxian

              Re: sachet of sugar... do the trick.

              "What - like xylitol?"

              Xylitol might not have been too bad. But in their infinite wisdom AGBarr have chosen aspartame.

              1. Anonymous Coward
                Anonymous Coward

                Re: The Need For Speed

                Aspartame... that stuff tastes fucking revolting, and instantly gives me belly ache/explosive shits. Why can't they just REDUCE the amount of sugar, why do they need to add that shite to it.

                I stopped drinking Lucozade for it, Aspartame should be saved for 'diet' / 'light' drinks. Oasis, Lilt, Dr Pepper, they all have aspartame in now instead of sugar, I am running out of soft drinks to purchase on the rare occasion I do actually fancy one, is nothing sacred!?

            2. lybad

              Re: sachet of sugar... do the trick.

              I'm a bit confused - are you suggesting xylitol isn't used any more? In that case, has anyone told the various mint/gum manufacturers etc. who use it to promote it's teeth friendly properties?

      2. Steve Button

        Re: Lateral Thinking

        "sugar is the new tobacco"

        No you've got it all wrong. Sugar is really good for you and not a slow poison that people have been suggesting for years. Go ahead and consume copious amounts, and us fuckwits will probably die of piousness before you do.

        1. Dave Bell

          Re: Lateral Thinking

          Total energy content matters, and there is evidence accumulating on the bad effects of a high-carb, low-fat, diet. There's a clear correlation, and there has been some pretty smart testing done to tease out the direction of causality. There are a lot of diet fads which go to extremes, based on slight evidence, and they go bad. The big change I have seen is the rise of "energy" drinks, and Irn-Bru might just be exotic enough to sell for some of the same reasons. A sugar cut isn't a bad thing, but whenever somebody goes for something obvious and simple, I suspect they are wrong.

          I don't know why people have this idea that Irn-Bru is unknown in England. Maybe they live so far south that they get their info from the French.

          1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

            Re: Lateral Thinking

            "I don't know why people have this idea that Irn-Bru is unknown in England. Maybe they live so far south that they get their info from the French."

            Yep, we always had access to Irn Bru right back from being a kid 50 years ago. Then again, Newcastle is further North than some parts of Scotland.

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Lateral Thinking

        "People said the same thing about Lucozade, but they still haven't done it."

        Lucozade are able to rely on the "but we're a sports drink" excuse ... that's why when fizzy drinks were banned from schools by son's school was still able to have a lucozade vending machine to help everyone "rebuiild their energy levels" after sports (though , of course, most sales would be in break and at lunchtime)

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Lateral Thinking

          > Lucozade are able to rely on the "but we're a sports drink" excuse

          And so is Irn Bru, Coke, Red Bull (beurgh!) and pretty much anything with lots of sugar and caffeine. The difference being you pay half the price at the cost of having to shake the gas off before you drink it.

      4. W4YBO

        Re: Lateral Thinking

        "Of all tyrannies a tyranny exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience."

        - C.S. Lewis

      5. QuiteEvilGraham

        Re: Lateral Thinking

        Except that Lucozade is not the only soft drink that out-sells Coca Cola in its market.

        Expect AG Barr to back-pedal on this one sharpish!

        PS, agree with the neo-puritan.

      6. Teiwaz Silver badge

        Re: Lateral Thinking

        It started as a suggestion, then it was a voluntary thing, and now it's 'if you don't drop most of the sugar from your sugary drink, you'll be paying an extra tax per 100ml'.

        Typical strategy, used on smokes, alcohol* in the last twenty years. Surprised we're not on the same on salt, transfats,

        * probably also on corporal punishment and seatbelts too.

        We'll be touching our toes at the behest of barely sane middle-aged 'battle-axes' every morning before we know it.**

        ** Yes, another 1984 reference.

        In most tribal cultures, what is'nt forbidden is mandatory. We're almost full circle in what isn't mandatory is taxed to buggery or outlawed.

        Still, I look forward to sugar speakeasys, a vibrant gang culture, and lots of new urban myths that will keep hollywood in sort of new material for the forty years after the madness is finally put to a stop.

        1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

          Re: Lateral Thinking

          "Surprised we're not on the same on salt,"

          We are. There are already Govt. threats in place over the salt levels in food. I find when eating out I need to add salt. Same when cooking. I need to add salt when using some pre-made ingredients when in the past I'd not have done. Tinned beans (of all types, not just baked beans) tinned tomatoes etc. all seem to have very low salt levels. Even OXO cubes seem to lack any salt nowadays.

          1. hplasm Silver badge
            Happy

            Re: Lateral Thinking

            "Even OXO cubes seem to lack any salt nowadays."

            So does my salt cellar! This explains that!

            (although it may just need filling...)

    2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      Re: Lateral Thinking

      "Can't the 'traditionalists' just add a teaspoon of sugar to it when they open it?"

      That's what I thought. And then I saw the problem. They need to drink it to steady the hand enough to pick up the teaspoon.

    3. 's water music Silver badge

      Re: Lateral Thinking

      Can't the 'traditionalists' just add a teaspoon of sugar to it when they open it? I suspect that 'Irn-Bru Classic' will be on sale in the summer.

      As an eight-year-old I tried this with a bottle of diet cola fresh from the soda stream at a friend's house after school (the regular Cola syrup had run out and the diet stuff tasted even worse in the days before Aspartame (which is bad enough). His mum was not happy with the results. Nucleation was not my friend that day

      1. BebopWeBop Silver badge

        Re: Lateral Thinking

        Yes I remember a favourite trick from School - having selected an unwitting victim, open their (plastic) bottle, drop a small mint sweet into it and then close - quickly. Move well away before it is opened.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Lateral Thinking

          All that's needed now is a skinny wham bar to shove in your bru. That'll sort it.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Lateral Thinking

        Out of respect I don't do this to Irn Bru but I do add one or two teaspoons of honey to my Coke. It does wonders to lift the spirits and relieve the cramps during long runs. Plus nobody asks for a sip.

    4. kevin king

      Re: Lateral Thinking

      <quote> Can't the 'traditionalists' just add a teaspoon of sugar to it when they open it? I suspect that 'Irn-Bru Classic' will be on sale in the summer. </quote>

      We'll be importing it from Algeria like they do with Mexican Coca-cola into the US....Yes IRN-BRU is a big seller in Algeria

    5. hplasm Silver badge

      Re: Lateral Thinking

      Have you ever tried putting sugar in a fizzy drink?

      It should be tried once, in a pub, with a packet of sugar from the coffee bar area.

      In someone else's pint.

      Then run.

  3. Spacedinvader
    Thumb Down

    If I wanted a lower sugar version I'd buy fucking diet or the zero one and not the full fat version.

    As for a sachet of sugar taped to the bottle. Go buy a diet Bru (or any other fizzy drink) and add a spoonful of sugar. Have a towel handy.

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

      1. Rob Daglish

        @Symon

        Aye, 'cos I've got a teaspoon and some water handy in the van when I'm fancying a bottle of Bru...

        1. This post has been deleted by its author

  4. This post has been deleted by its author

  5. Tigra 07 Silver badge

    Down with this sort of thing...

    People don't like change. They protested the change to New Coke heavily despite taste tests showing people preferred it.

    I too dislike change. Boo! Leave Irn Bru alone!

    1. Charles 9 Silver badge

      Re: Down with this sort of thing...

      And yet it got derided as Cokesi, and Coke backpedaled, meaning taste tests aren't always gospel.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Down with this sort of thing...

      I think the issue with new coke was that CocaCola assumed all exisitng drinkers would stick with the brand and taste tests showed *Pepsi drinkers* preferred it

  6. Alister Silver badge

    But just think of the opportunities! They can double the amount of GERRRDERRRS for a higher Iron content...

  7. JimboSmith Silver badge

    Screw that.

    My Scottish friends will be annoyed. I bought one of them a day after birthday present of Irn Bru because it had been a heavy evening the night before. Boy was she glad of the liquid refreshment.

    My favourite Irn Bru Adverts:

    Made In Scotland

    The Snowman

    1. Tezfair

      Re: Screw that.

      the links go to the same video, but great to watch them again

      1. JimboSmith Silver badge

        Re: Screw that.

        Oops sorry the snowman is here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4yZOab5gl-4

    2. phuzz Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: Screw that.

      Can confirm, buying a Scot a can of Iron Bru the morning after will make you a friend for life.

      (Even if you're English)

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    National scandal

    Next up : Low alcohol Buckfast. Taking the 'break' out of 'break the hoose juice'.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: National scandal

      I bought a bottle of buckie once, but didn't drink it straightaway and went out for the night. After coming home I discovered that a flatmate had pinched it, drunk the lot, passed out and managed to shit herself, getting it on the carpet to boot. The shite that is, not the jakie juice.

      I took that as an omen and have still never tried the stuff.

      1. QuiteEvilGraham

        Re: National scandal

        Have had the flu this last week, and was horrified to discover that someone my son had smuggled into the house whilst I was incapacitated had left an empty bottle thereof in the house. He is now banished to his mum's in Glasgow.

    2. To Mars in Man Bras!
      Windows

      Re: National scandal

      >>Next up : Low alcohol Buckfast...

      Pah! --Buckfast was for sophisticated lightweights who couldn't handle Mundy's

      1. CommanderGalaxian
        Happy

        Re: National scandal

        "Pah! --Buckfast was for sophisticated lightweights..."

        You're not doing it right. You're supposed to dissolve a couple of acid tabs in a bottle of Buckie the night before - and then drink it the next day.

        1. d3vy Silver badge

          Re: National scandal

          We used to run a little shop when I was a kid in Stirling...

          Can of strong lager and an askit powder was the norm for the alkies that came in first thing.

          My understanding is that dissolving an askit in your lager will put you on your arse for most of the day.

  9. seven of five

    Blasphemy.

    If you can´t cope with the BRU, get out!

  10. BigBertha

    How to be English in Three Easy Steps

    Step 1: Post an article on an IT news website that has nothing to do with IT, and just appears to make jokes about Scottish people.

    Step 2: Include a Braveheart-inspired picture and use the word 'Jocks' in the title.

    Step 3: Wonder why Scottish people don't like you.

    1. FireBurn
      Devil

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      Casual racism is the best racism

    2. Nick Ryan Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      How to be Scottish in one easy step

      Step 1: Convince yourself, repeatedly, that the English hate you.

      We don't. We're too busy hating the French.

      (joke, for those that don't spot the icon)

      1. tiggity Silver badge

        Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

        Always happy when people do not assume icon is noticed ;-)

        (I browse with images off by default due to soggy string level of bandwidth speeds )

      2. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

        Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

        We don't. We're too busy hating the French.

        (joke, for those that don't spot the icon)

        What is this vile slur? What kind of pathetic excuse for an Englishman are you?

        Of course we hate the French!

        Disliking France has been a cornerstone of British foreign policy for nearly 1,000 years! We only relinquished the claim to the French throne around 1800...

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

          Ahem: British != English

          (Something else that really irks 3/4 of the nations of the UK, when the English forget that (which, annoyingly, is almost every single time))

          You should look up the “Auld Alliance”, as certainly not all of us hate the French.

          And right now, a Passport to Pimlico is also looking like it would be a very useful thing to have (thanks to the voting choice of what was mostly small-minded Englanders, sadly (yes, we know it wasn’t all of you)).

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

        > Step 1: Convince yourself, repeatedly, that the English hate you.

        Having lived in Glasgow* I can confirm that the people that hate the Scottish most are the Scottish. They fucking despise them. Same with south vs north Wales.

        More on topic; anyone know how an English boy can get the proper stuff (in glass bottles) south of the border?

        * Greatest city in the UK by the way**. Bristol is a close second.

        ** I pure said that in ma heed with a wee Cumbernauld accent.

        1. BebopWeBop Silver badge

          Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

          Having lived in Glasgow* I can confirm that the people that hate the Scottish most are the Scottish.

          I used to just think it was a Glaswegian hatred of Edinburgh dweller - and then I was going out with a Glaswegian and witnessed the Rangers-Celtic match aftermath.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

            >** I pure said that in ma heed with a wee Cumbernauld accent.

            What's it called? Cumbernauld.

            What's it like? Shite.

            A small portion of readers will get that.

            1. grod

              Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

              > What's it called? Cumbernauld.

              > A small portion of readers will get that.

              The only advert to ever anthropomorphise a factory? Who could forget it!

            2. Gobhicks

              Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

              Ther's only two things wrong with Cumbernauld: it's there and nobody's bombed it.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      "Post an article on an IT news website that has nothing to do with IT"

      I thought the IT industry ran on sugar? I certainly do! This is huge news - not only are our CPUs slowing down, but so are the meat sacks looking after them.

      1. JimboSmith Silver badge

        Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

        I thought the IT industry ran on sugar?

        Sugar and Caffeine in this case!

        1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
          Happy

          Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

          Just looked it up. And Irn Bru has all the good things!

          Sunset Yellow and Ponceau to make it radioactive orange. Loadsa sugar to give you energy. Caffeine to keep you awake. And quinine, should the Scottish midges ever decide to upgrade their attacks to include malaria.

          Oh, and ammonium ferric citrate. Which is apparently used in water purification.

          Which all suggests that Irn Bru should be prescribed on the NHS.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Radioactive orange

            I’ll swear by the magic medicinal qualities of the caffeine and quinine in Irn-Bru, but when the EU recommended that they change their colourings to something less noxious (and potentially hyperactivity causing (and not in a good way)), Barr’s took a perverse delight in very loudly refusing to do so <sigh>.

            So it’s perhaps not surprising that they have chosen to use aspartame, a sweetener with a dubious history (and which breaks down in warm temperatures), rather than a more modern sweetener such as stevia (a natural plant extract) or sucralose (based on sugar and intentionally designed as a sweetener, rather than the dodgy lab experiment that is aspartame).

            I’m sure Barr’s are doing this more to avoid the sugar tax than out of any actual concern for the health of their customers.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      Personally I have yet to meet a Scottish person that couldn't take a bit of pisstakery or indeed ever took offence. I put this down to nobody taking their freedom!

    5. Elmer Phud Silver badge

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      Nothing to do with IT?

      1:How are crucial employees to revive without the orange elixir?

      2:They are Feegles.

      3: I'm sure that intense therapy will be required to get over the shock, time to start on the Xmas single malt collection.

      1. Alister Silver badge

        Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

        2:They are Feegles.

        Nae king, nae quin, nae suugarr, we willnae be fuled agin!

        1. 's water music Silver badge
          Pint

          Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

          Nae king, nae quin, nae suugarr, we willnae be fuled agin!

          Nothing that won't be fixed by some Special Sheep Liniment

      2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

        Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

        "time to start on the Xmas single malt collection."

        Why were you delaying?

    6. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      Step 3: Wonder why Scottish people don't like you.

      This is El Reg. Do you think they care if people like them?

    7. J J Carter Silver badge

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      Och, just banter!

    8. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      "Step 3: Wonder why Scottish people don't like you."

      Step 5. Hope they FO and leave the UK so that paying a few Scotistani Groats to cross the border for Duty Free gives a reason to visit the place. Or alternatively wait a few decades for AWG to make it slightly less inhospitable to visit "Greece without the sun"!

    9. Teiwaz Silver badge

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      Step 3: Wonder why Scottish people don't like you.

      On this article? I doubt it.

      The reg readership, like a lot of Scots I know like a good laugh, and a good moan and a grumble, and this article has both.

    10. Mark 85 Silver badge

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      Nice first post Bertha... this is "Bootnotes" where pretty much anything goes. Deal with it as IT folks do have a sense of the "off the wall" and not being serious all the time.

    11. To Mars in Man Bras!
      Facepalm

      Re: How to Take The Fun Out of Life in Three Easy Steps

      1: Fail to appreciate that there's a difference between "affectionate ribbing" and hate speech

      2: Completely lose sense of humour

      3: Take offence [usually on other people's behalf] at the slightest opportunity --even when none was intended

    12. Velv Silver badge
      Boffin

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      “Post an article on an IT news website that has nothing to do with IT...”

      Perhaps you never read about the Aye-Mac

    13. d3vy Silver badge

      Re: How to be English in Three Easy Steps

      @bertha

      Hey you, you're a pie.

  11. Dr. G. Freeman

    Why ? Just Why ?

    Bru has one use- to give you a rush of sugar to clear hangovers, or other head-clearing activities (find a can is quite useful for additional thinking power)

    So, cutting the sugar means not as much of a sugar rush- we don't exactly drink it for the taste.

    Low sugar is Diet Bru or that abomination Irn-Bru Xtra.

    1. lybad

      Personally, I think Irn-Bru Sugar Free is the abomination (there is no such thing currently as Diet Irn-Bru), and the Xtra one is the decent no-sugar version.

  12. Duncan_Campbell

    Irn Bru got fixed and healthy

    Back in Edinburgh for Hogmanay, this Reg contributor found the new "Xtra" (link below) was stocked instead of the weakish no sugar version still supplied in England. "Extra" took me back to being a metre tall in Glasgow.

    http://www.thedrum.com/news/2016/07/24/ag-barr-reveals-irn-bru-xtra-part-its-new-marketing-strategy-following-sugar-tax

  13. Anonymous Custard Silver badge
    Trollface

    Fighting talk...

    their beloved national soft drink Irn-Bru

    Irn-Bru a soft drink? That's fighting talk right there...

    1. Korev Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Fighting talk...

      Yep, loch them up and throw away the key

      1. d3vy Silver badge

        Re: Fighting talk...

        I know that's meant to be funny... But that's not how that word is pronounced...

        It sounds more like a Scouser saying lock him up.

  14. SVV Silver badge

    Advertising Standards Authority

    As a result of our analysis confirming 0% girder content, the advert for this product has been deemed "misleading".

  15. Ben Bonsall

    As long as they don't change Buckfast.

  16. Big_Boomer
    Alert

    The Donald

    What on earth is The Donald going to bathe in now to get his healthy orange glow? :-)

    Personally I actually prefer the DietBru to the full sugar variety, but then I'm a soft southern jessie and quite fat enough already thank you.

    For hangovers I prefer a litre of fruit juice, 2 paracetamols and a can of cold creamed rice. Then back to bed to sleep it off.

  17. P.Nutt

    Lets hope its a very clever Ad campaign

    Given Barrs history of having very good ads promoting this wonderful hangover cure I can only hope and pray to the gods of hangovers that this is just a brilliant way to get folk talking about the product and rushing out to A) Stockpile it (Have 20 cans still left from Xmas myself) or B) try it for the 1st time.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Guess what?

    It's just Tizer.

    P.S. During the independence referendum campaign, I heard a woman on the radio say she was going to vote Yes because Irn Bru™ isn’t made in England (it is).

    This is the kind of thing the SNP’s stormtroopers love to kick off about, like the time they thought the lion had been removed from the Tunnock's wrapper (it was never on there in the first place)…

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      Re: Guess what?

      I had some Tizer recently, out of a sudden onset of nostalgia. It was horrible. In a completely different way to how horrible Irn Bru is. So they aren't the same drink.

      In fact, I just looked it up. Obviously they're both just sugar and fizzy water, but there's a different set of flavourings in the two. And Irn Bru contains quinine. So if global warming ever heats Scotland up to the extent that it's at risk of malaria, the Irn Bru will keep them safe.

      Barrs also make dandelion and burdock. Loved it as a kid, tried it recently. It covers your teeth in horrible furry stuff. Yuck. Also way too sweet.

      1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge
        Alert

        Re: Guess what?

        So if global warming ever heats Scotland up to the extent that it's at risk of malaria

        My God, the midges aren't enough, you want mosquitoes as well?

        1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

          Re: Guess what?

          "My God, the midges aren't enough, you want mosquitoes as well?"

          Scottish midges saw off the mosquitoes years ago. They won't be back! It was carnage I tell you, carnage!

      2. John H Woods Silver badge

        Re: Guess what?

        You can get some good D&Bs... Fentimans isn't too bad

      3. grod

        Re: Guess what?

        > Barrs also make dandelion and burdock. Loved it as a kid, tried it recently. It covers your teeth in horrible furry stuff.

        That's how we keep our teeth warm!

    2. d3vy Silver badge

      Re: Guess what?

      Irn bru isn't tizer.

      1. werdsmith Silver badge

        Re: Guess what?

        Tizer isn't even originally a Barrs drink, it's only been Barrs since 1972. Before that it was Pickup.

        Irn Bru is OK, cold from a glass bottle with a roll and square sausage or a mutton pie if consumed on a dreich day in Scotland. In any other circumstance it can resume its primary purpose as a sink and drain unblocker.

        1. Ken Moorhouse Silver badge

          Re: Tizer

          Just to clarify that Tizer was certainly called Tizer, as I remember it in the 1960's.

          http://www.fundinguniverse.com/company-histories/ag-barr-plc-history/

  19. Alfie

    Publicity stunt

    There are already 'diet' versions so why would they create another one? Push the price up to cover the sugar tax, and folks will pay the premium for the good stuff. Of course AG Barr's might make a mistake in the sugar tax premium and 'accidentally' make even more profit out of it.

    But dont listen to me, I'm a bad scotsman, I've avoided processed sugar for a few years now and can probably count on one hand the number of times I've had a can of the Bru since then. Your taste buds reset after a while and I find them all pretty disgusting now, and the aspartame and other carcenogenic compound versions even worse. If you want to put yourself off ever drinking Coke/Mountain Dew/Irn Bru ever again, I can recommend watching That Sugar Film.

    I've also avoided a Pizza Crunch, and never seen a deep fried Mars bar, as I dont go into chip shops in the tourist hotspots.

  20. Andy Scott

    BOFH

    I wonder what the BOFH's opinion of this news is, as he's a big Irn-Bru fan

  21. JohnFen Silver badge

    They should learn Coke's lesson

    When the New Coke debacle happened in the US, it was because Coca-Cola forgot a fundamental truth about long-established soft drinks: people don't drink them for the taste, but because they're have cultural meaning. Changing them -- even if the change doesn't impact (or is an improvement on) taste -- will get people mad because it's perceived as a cultural loss.

    Better to introduce a separate product than to change the one people cherish.

    1. Trilkhai

      Re: They should learn Coke's lesson

      In the US, it actually depended on which part of the country you looked at. People in the South did take it as an attack on their culture, as did many older adults.

      There was also a twist to the situation... The taste tests showed that people felt it was "sweeter" than the original — but the company reported that a significant chunk of the flavor backlash was focused on the drink's acidity masking the sweetness. (I certainly remember it seeming much too Pepsi-like.) Given that New Coke appeared during the time periods that bottling companies were switching over to HFCS, it's possible that the version that won taste tests used cane sugar while the final product often used HFCS.

  22. Grant Fromage

    I wonder what it will do to it`s (odd) use as a mixer?

    Some 20 years ago a formal company Christmas party turned into a back to someone`s and we almost completely shook off the boring bastards,

    ( they will emerge with more alcohol intake and become unsociable so it is like keeping weeds at bay, but our fun lawn stayed pretty tidy)

    Before the shutting times of shops became critical.we had run out of wine and had a spirits and mixers crisis on the second bit. ( I`m fime a little water with whiskies and rums and that is all) .

    From this came Jack Daniels with Irrn Bru, which should not work. in small amounts they complement. I tried to demo this with a sugar free one years later and it tasted like TCP and my little cred was under scrutiny.

    The sstandard southern scot drink down south was Barr`s Tizer, But I had IRN BRU in both Stepney and Romford as a kid, it was marketing by coke overwhelmed until about 198x and the fightback. We had Idris and R White`s ( good on you Elvis Costello) lemonade too but Idris Cream Soda was the no 1 drink as a kid sweet and complicated.

    Tennants lager had pictures of unattanable wholesomely pretty girls to tease budding engineer geeks, like the Big D nuts card with Beverley Pilkington who I years later discovered lived up the road from me when was 18 and she was a year older ( and remainst hus).

    HATRED:... NO!.... takes too much effort and destroys people so that is all they do, look at the multiple crap fuelled by this today all over. Amongst many life experiences I had the joy of visting Ruanda after the "troubles". and that informs me how quickly us and them rather than family squabbles get to inhuman act level.

    The Scots and the Frrench are family to the English, have been for a few hundred of years and we get on each others nerves,

    There are historical squabbles that are just there for the squabble. That isn`t hatred, more your irritating cousin winding you up about grandad`s book collection in the will.

    The Scot`s and the French ganged up against in various plots.So? Family history.

    The French domination of the EU civil service structure in no particular order screwed up our fire extinguisher coding, the low emissions engines suddenly had to have a cat by law rather than just fit the specs, and Volkswagen... and all that unscientific stuff was behind the brexist swell. From every engineer and infrormed others that I know..

    Be kind, be tolerant but reject iffy and wrong stuff as soon as you spot it and challenge it always

    1. Grant Fromage

      Re: I wonder what it will do to it`s (odd) use as a mixer?

      Missed off the last line especially when it is one of my posts!

      1. Havin_it

        Re: I wonder what it will do to it`s (odd) use as a mixer?

        Shame, you were doing so well up until then... </wtfdidijustread>

  23. Kaltern

    Money

    The only reason it's being changed is the sugar tax. That's it. And replacing it with Aspartame. Because you know, FDA approved and all.

    Of course, alcohol doesn't seem to be affected... being made of sugar... nothing to do with loss of tax revenue... only someone cynical would think such things...

    1. Charles 9 Silver badge

      Re: Money

      Isn't that because alcohol is already taxed? Besides, most alcohol isn't really made from sugar as we'd call it sugar in any event unless you're moonshining. Whiskeys are made from grains, rum from molasses (a sugar precursor), brandy and wine from grape juice, etc.

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Leave the same amount of sugar

    Just make the cans twice as big!

    - Jimmy

  25. Ken Moorhouse Silver badge

    Get the Competitions & Mergers Authority to ban this change

    In the news on the same day the CMA are blocking the Innocence/Refresco merger on the grounds that "consumer choice could be restricted".

    (Ok Ive been selective in my choice of quote, but just claim it as a cast-iron protest against a flaccid Barr product).

    http://www.cityam.com/278138/refresco-drinks-merger-could-mean-higher-prices-shoppers

  26. DougS Silver badge

    Sounds awful

    Since alcohol is metabolized to sugar the last thing you should want for a hangover is a bunch of sugar.

    Still, it seems like they could change the formula and still have Irn Bru classic or original or whatever for those who don't think it would be the same thing to just dump a couple teaspoons of sugar into the lighter version.

  27. davemcwish

    Hangover cure of the gods..

    When coupled with a square sausage in a morning roll.

    Can get all three versions of the fizzy ginger quite easily down south here in East London. I kinda like XTRA ; the Sugar Free one doesn't taste of much really TBH.

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Casual offence by referring to Scots as Jocks, typical English based bigotry

    Nothing like a bit of a casual racism, would have expected bit better from The Register, stooping to same levels as Daily Mail.

    Suppose thats why a lot of Scottish people hate the English (English based media anyway)

    I suppose the English are referred to as Cu@ts by a lot of us

    1. ForthIsNotDead Silver badge

      Re: Casual offence by referring to Scots as Jocks, typical English based bigotry

      The Scottish are not a different race. Living on the other side of an imaginary line drawn on a map by some self-appointed "king" a thousand years or more ago does not make them a different race.

      Then again... there is the red hair thing!

    2. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      Re: Casual offence by referring to Scots as Jocks, typical English based bigotry

      "Nothing like a bit of a casual racism,"

      I think you are confused between race and nationality.

      1. d3vy Silver badge

        Re: Casual offence by referring to Scots as Jocks, typical English based bigotry

        Actually John the definition of racism extends to people of different nationalities and minority groups not just races.

        At least under current discrimination laws.

  29. steelpillow Silver badge
    Joke

    Lite Ally Bru

    A new low-sugar "light" recipe would obviously have to be brewed from light alloy...

    1. Havin_it

      Re: Lite Ally Bru

      I suppose, but "Made in Scotland from poagled mountain-bike frames" doesn't quite have the same ring to it.

      (Actually, now I've sung it out loud, I like it better!)

    2. Ken Moorhouse Silver badge

      Re: brewed from light alloy...

      People are advised to read the ingredients list in case they have a metallurgy.

  30. ForthIsNotDead Silver badge

    Taste

    As an Englishman living in Scotland for the last 13 or so years, I've never really gotten used to the taste. Imagine the taste of sweaty socks mixed with burning tyres...

    That's Irn Bru.

    I actually think it tastes better when it's flat, rather than fizzy. It's smoother. But I think the same about cola, so it's probably just me.

    My six-year old daughter bloody loves the stuff, though.

    Given that she's such a fan, I'm quite happy to hear of the sugar reduction; maybe we won't need to be so stingy in rationing it!

    1. werdsmith Silver badge

      Re: Taste

      The taste just reminds me of old fashioned fruit flavour cheap bubble gum in the 1970s.

  31. jockbroon

    Recipe?

    This is a stab in the dark, and The Register isn't the place I'd expect to find an answer to this question, but I've been trying for years to find a copycat recipe for Irn Bru. Does anyone know what's in it?

    There's tons of recipes for Coca Cola out there but none for Irn Bru!

    Example Coca Cola recipe: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/this-american-life-reveals-coca-colas-secret-recipe-full-ingredient-list/

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This is all caused by the CASSH Consensus Action on Salt, Sugar, and Health.

    A bunch of po faced holier than thou types fronted by a diabetic MP who try to get anything a bit Sweet or Salty banned rather than allowing consumers to make their own choices based on the pack labelling.

    Industry wide, every Processed food manufacturer is being forced to cut calorie levels to hit their arbitrary targets [100Kcal or less per snack] which will be enforced with the sugar tax when it comes in.

    This of course ties into the cost of raw materials caused directly [mostly] by Brexit [Look at commodity prices of Butter & Eggs for a shock] and the ongoing shrinkflation of pack sizes.

    Nearly every drink now, even my beloved Vimto has artificial sweeteners which I hate the taste of.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "...rather than allowing consumers to make their own choices..."

      And getting everyone else to foot their bill as they spend all their money on the sweets and salties? Now do you see the problem? The problem with "let everyone make their own choices" is that people don't live in isolation, and their actions (for good or ill) affect everyone around them, which in turns affects everyone around them, and so on.

  33. Stevie Silver badge

    Bah!

    IRN BRU Classic?

    I don't care. I prefer the refreshing taste of Fizzy-Bubbly.

  34. Eduard Coli

    Cost?

    Ahh, sugar is expensive, so perhaps someone wants a bonus and needs to meet a goal?

    They did the same thing to Coca-Cola in the states and it was never the same.

    The closest you can get to "the real thing" is to either get it from Mexico or wait for the Passover formula.

  35. Chuksha
    IT Angle

    Does the entire Scottish IT industry run on sugar or something?

  36. PabloGuero

    Irn-Bru reminds me of a similar soft drink in Texas called Big Red, which also is hailed as a hang-over cure.

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