back to article IBM kills Bluemix, a year after killing SoftLayer

IBM has re-named its cloud. Again. The last change of stationery was on October 25th, 2016, when IBM decided to replace the “SoftLayer" name and replace it with Bluemix. On Tuesday this week the company changed it again, announcing that “Bluemix is now IBM Cloud”. The company's rationale is that “we are merging the Bluemix …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Of course they have, they kill off a "name/service" every year and try and sucker customers into thinking they are selling some new and exciting product, all the while selling the same old pig.

    1. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

      while selling the same old pig.

      But, but, it'll have a whole new shade of lipstick!

    2. Slabfondler
      Black Helicopters

      There is at least one exception...sort of

      When the bought BigFix and tried to re-brand that as Tivoli Endpoint Manager, the existing BigFix customers kicked up a huge fuss and they unbranded it back to BigFix.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Stick to Mainframes, IBM

    You are fuck all use at anything else.

  3. Warm Braw Silver badge

    The project ... has slipped

    If only there were some large IT consulting firm they could have turned to...

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I remember when I supported Lotus Sametime. IBM bought it up and renamed it IBM Tivoli Messaging and Collaboration Services. Even our salespeople kept calling it Sametime because DUUUHH.

    1. Blotto Bronze badge

      its still called sametime

      1. Captain Scarlet Silver badge

        First time I came across it, was called Lotus Sametime, then IBM Lotus Sametime and then IBM Sametime.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          First time I came across it, was called Lotus Sametime, then IBM Lotus Sametime and then IBM Sametime.

          Inside IBM we usually referred to it as "SomeTime". Last I heard the entire company's ST infrastructure was running on a PC350 somewhere. And since they couldn't stabilize the infrastructure, they banned all 3rd-party clients.

    2. cintra
      Facepalm

      Marketing genius

      Plenty more examples of that.

      Such as the ThinkPad "Butterfly" - a superb way to reference the laptop's unique ability to unfold its keyboard like the wings of a newly-born butterfly as it viewed the dawn for the very first time.

      Or the 701C, to give it its official IBM name.

  5. Doctor Huh?

    Innovative!!

    The usual metaphor for this sort of thing is "shuffling the deck chairs on the Titanic," however I feel IBM has innovated in this area. Re-naming and re-branding every few months seems like less effort than moving physical chairs. I'd love to come up with a suitable Titanic-based metaphor, but I think "re-branding the IBM Cloud" will become the metaphor everyone uses in the future for a futile, lackluster effort that ultimately promises no significant change.

    1. seven of five

      shuffling the deck chairs on the Titanic

      At least IBM is old enough to have shuffeld deck chairs on said boat. Well CTR, as they called themselves back then.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: shuffling the deck chairs on the Titanic

        My favourite IBM rebranding is Spectrum Storage, or rectum storage, as I prefer to call it. They even have an appropriate logo: https://www.ibm.com/storage/spectrum

        1. chrismevans

          Re: shuffling the deck chairs on the Titanic

          The Spectrum branding was just plain stupid. The names don't 100% reflect what the products were. Whereas XIV, SVC, TSM, etc were names customers were familiar with. I have to look every time to work out what the Spectrum XXX products are.

          When you feel a need to rebrand a set of disparate products to make them look like a strategy, then you've lost the plot.

        2. JohnMartin

          Sphincter Storage Logo

          Hahahahaha - Thank you for making laugh while reading a dry article on rebranding the cloud (hmm can't think of any other time something cloud related has been rebranded)

          There's so much that can be done with Sphincter Storage ... I wonder if it's time for another simplistic.io

  6. MCMLXV

    "As Gartner opined in June 107"

    Blimey, IBM have been around for longer than I realised...

    1. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

      Re: "As Gartner opined in June 107"

      Didn't you know? The Antikythera mechanism was built by Ithaka Business Machines.

  7. nijam

    > ... the sun rising behind it, to suggest a new dawn ...

    the sun rising behind it, to suggest the cloud being burned off.

    1. thelonederanger

      Sunrise, Sunset

      I prefer to think of the sun setting behind the cloud - much more appropriate metaphor.

      Of course, in 6 months when they rebrand again they can change the cloud to a mushroom cloud...

  8. colinb

    Sorry

    but that just looks like a Radioactive Turd to me.

  9. lime

    "...but the symbolism is pretty obvious: a butt with the sun rising behind it..."

    1. J2Alpha

      so ... AaaS

      or Arse as a Service, at least that's my experience of their cloudy offerings.

  10. JMiles

    All IBM lacks really is a single vision. They need a Bezos, Nadella or Benioff that can actually lead a coherent vision.

    Not saying that any of these names are necessarily role models but at least they actually know how to do something other than accounting and marketing gimmicks. When one of those three have something to say many people listen; when was the last time anyone cared what an IBM CEO had to say?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      > when was the last time anyone cared what an IBM CEO had to say?

      More than 15 years ago, during Lou Gestner tenure.

    2. Craig Campbell

      Agreed

      Agreed. Someone who can drive a coherent strategy, stop marketing doing silly things like renaming products every year or so, put customers first. Probably won't be too long until a new CEO anyhow.

      re: naming of products. It's not just IBM. All vendors rename their products every so often. Microsoft, VMware, Dell, Oracle. It's when silly marketing folks need something to do.

  11. This post has been deleted by its author

    1. Ken 16 Silver badge
      Windows

      Does it offer a PL/1 service?

      We're not all on Cobol yet, you know!

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Marketing

    Yawn, it's what marketing guys do to keep themselves in a job

  13. IanMoore33
    Mushroom

    openstack under the web gui

    pssttt - it's all Openstack under the GUI .. and barebone installs from cobbler based servers

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    logo

    but the symbolism is pretty obvious: a cloud with the sun rising behind it, to suggest a new dawn and/or possibilities

    I thought it was just their cloud evaporating.

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