back to article What a time to be alive: drone pooper-scoopers are a thing now

Finding dog poo in public places and picking it up before it can besmirch a sole probably isn't high on the list of things humanity needs to get better at, but that hasn't stopped Dutch folk throwing two drones at the problem. Dog enthusiast website Tinki.nl and an outfit called Space53 cooked up the idea of a “Watchdog 1” …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This technology won't translate to the UK, where dog poop is bagged and hung in trees.

    #bringBackWhiteDogShit

    1. Fr. Ted Crilly
      Pint

      Wow, googlewhack!

    2. Def Silver badge

      The same shit (pun not intended) goes on in Norway a lot of the time too.

      But think about this though... There are roughly 8.5 million dogs in the UK (a quick Google informed me). Let's say half of those owners bag up their dog's shit. That's around 8 million bags a day (give or take), or 2.9 billion bags a year.

      To be honest, I'm surprised there are still trees standing in the UK.

  2. Marketing Hack Silver badge
    Go

    The Turd Bird?

    Smelli-copter?

    Also--Travel Advisory: Remind me to stay off the grass the next time I am in the Netherlands.

    1. Potemkine Silver badge

      Re: The Turd Bird?

      Remind me to stay off the grass the next time I am in the Netherlands.

      So bad, they have really good one up there ^^

    2. druck

      Re: The Turd Bird?

      Someone trying to score themselves a free Amazon parcel is going to get a nasty surprise if they capture one of these Turd Birds instead.

  3. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken Silver badge

    Nice website - and you can sign up to be a test pilot!

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Heh

    Next step: use the flying feces to *power* the drone charge station.

    Can't be that hard plus the leftovers are basically harmless if sufficient heat is applied.

    Very effective in the summer with relatively simple focusing system.

    Wonder if a wireless mesh network powered by canine deposits is feasible?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Heh

      Next step: use the flying feces to *power* the drone charge station.

      I see a different use: have a drone kept by the park and use it to drop, er, "droppings" on the owner if not cleaned up. A sort of "return to owner" policy. A few educational events should suffice.

      Of course, someone is going to poo poo the idea..

      1. Dave 126 Silver badge

        Re: Heh

        > Can't be that hard plus the leftovers are basically harmless if sufficient heat is applied.

        Or use a microbiological process to render the poo harmless. The poo itself would supply the energy to do this. Of course, the timescale required would mean that the drone can only process so much poo per week. The bioreactor could be hidden in a roadside tree planter.

  5. MrDamage

    Terse remarks?

    I prefer my mates solution. Carries disposable gloves just so he can pick up the offending material to throw at the offending dogs owner.

    1. Anonymous Coward Silver badge
      Black Helicopters

      Re: Terse remarks?

      I was hoping that the aerial drone would include tracking ability to follow the perpetrator, then the rolling drone can include a catapult...

      1. Mike Richards Silver badge

        Re: Terse remarks?

        Or just equip the flying drone with a Hellfire missile and take out the mutt and its owner.

  6. DougS Silver badge

    Why restrict it to dog poo?

    Damn animals who can't be bothered to learn to use a toilet are pooping all over nature, including places where people walk like backyards, parks and sidewalks. They should pick up all the bird poop, rabbit turds, squirrel pellets and what not so us humans can walk around wherever we want without a care in the world like our shit don't stink!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Why restrict it to dog poo?

      While I do not see it used in civilized countries (Holland included), I can see it being sold to less civilized places like for example France. This can be sold to the Paris city council for some big bucks.

      There, it can pick up dog and not so dog poo which litters the sidewalk at an average of one per every few meters. Paris is the only European city where I never go for a morning run when at a conference - the stench of piss and the amount of dog (and not only dog) turds on the sidewalk is off the scale. I have seen only one or two public places worldwide with that much poo per square meter of public place.

      1. Pen-y-gors Silver badge

        Re: Why restrict it to dog poo?

        France?

        Ah yes, but it's traditional. Apparently the courtiers of Louis the whatever used to perform their bodilly functions in the corridors at Versailles.

  7. Fr. Ted Crilly
    Holmes

    Ai still has a way to go yet...

    what could possibly go wrong...

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hX_Idw__fTY

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Ai still has a way to go yet...

      .. that is .. epic. Talk about polishing a turd..

      Still laughing. Brilliant.

  8. Evil Auditor Silver badge

    Finding dog poo in public places and picking it up before it can besmirch a sole probably isn't high on the list of things humanity needs to get better at

    You haven't been to Brussels, have you?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      It's fine around the train stations and metro as far as I can tell. Or maybe I just got used to it :).

      1. Def Silver badge
        Joke

        I think you'll find the original station building was demolished some years ago and what's there now has just accumulated over time.

  9. Katie Saucey
    Terminator

    Good luck with that

    My 2 100lb German Shepards would disable or destroy the ground based robot in under 5 seconds, especially if it emitted the slightest whirring noise (which I assume it would), not just because as puppies they where teased with RC cars, but because I think most dogs would think it was an evil vacuum cleaner gone Terminator.

  10. codemonkey
    Happy

    The Culture

    Ian was right...

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: The Culture

      Iain M

      :)

  11. Pen-y-gors Silver badge

    Much too limited a scale.

    What we need is an army of flying drones, and require every dog-owner to buy one. They will follow the dog wherever it goes and scoop up the nastiness wherever it falls, as well as soak up any liquid with a large sponge.

    Or, of course, a much more radical and hi-tech solution, require every dog owner to buy a supply of recyclable plastic bags AND USE THEM!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Much too limited a scale.

      Recyclable plastic bags!? What happens to the turds while the bags are being recycled?

      1. lglethal Silver badge
        Trollface

        Re: Much too limited a scale.

        You've heard of Marmite, right?

  12. kmac499

    Real World Testing

    Try following my labrador around on Sunday after it's found and enjoyed the odd Saturday night leftover pavement pizza or extra chilli kebab. You'll need a sponge and a tank not a grapple..

  13. dbayly

    I know a few horse owners who spend a lot of time shovelling horse shit in paddocks. Seems like another opportunity for these developers

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      In the 19th Century, the world's first congress of town planners got together to address a major issue: If the trading in cities continued at the current rate, horse manure would reach a height of 10' in city streets by 1930.

  14. Simon Harris Silver badge
    Coat

    If the flying drone gets too close to the poo...

    we could end up with the fan hitting the shit.

    Mine's the one with the plastic bags in the pocket ---------->

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Nowhere near enough

    A few months ago, my dog (Rottweiler st bernard crossbreed, quite a big doggy) had Hemorrhagic Colitis. Trust me, a drone is not man enough for that task. A Chinook would have been necessary, together with a team of people in full Biohazard kit, with shovels, fire hoses, and gallons of Jeys Fluid. They would all have required counseling after the event too. For the animal lovers out there, he's fine now.

    1. Joefish
      Black Helicopters

      Re: Nowhere near enough

      I wouldn't trust a Chinook to lift it myself right now...

  16. fajensen Silver badge
    Mushroom

    Lasers, want Lasers!!

    I want the turd to be blasted into sparkly plasma by a ludicrously overpowered directed energy system* that some crazy hippie-like character with dreadlocks bought really cheap from a junked 1980's SDI project.

    *) 'cause we never use trigger words like "weapon" any more in the sales material, and the turd should really be "serviced" rather than "blasted.

  17. WylieCoyoteUK
    Black Helicopters

    Another example of automation threatening jobs

    I was amused to see a guy in Dieppe, France, driving a silver scooter with a large pipe on the back.

    He placed the end of the pipe over some offending dog poo and there was a sucking sound, then he drove off, leaving a neat circle of disinfectant on the pavement.

    They are called Motocrottes.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVC0mThS32o

  18. John Smith 19 Gold badge
    Coat

    "The Return of Captain Dog Toffee."

    Drop that flop!

  19. Big_Ted

    useless . . . . .

    A dalek used to be defeated by stairs . Now we have poo robots that will be defeated by grass longer than an inch . . . .

    My dog likes longer grass to go in, the drones wouldnt be able to approach the treasure let alone gather it up.

    No a heavy duty laser is the only way, it can dry and burn the product in one go.

    1. HW de Haan

      Re: useless . . . . .

      Including the long grass your dog loves so much..

  20. Dan 10

    Genius

    Weirdly, people in the countryside don't seem to pick up after their dogs. It's the one thing that is worse than when living in a (UK) city.

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2019