back to article Nobody expects... a surprise haemorrhoid operation

Decades of authoritarian one party rule have perhaps reduced one man's ability to question authority as a Chinese bloke awaiting the birth of his child was erroneously whisked in for a haemorrhoidectomy. Doctors at Shenyang Hunnan Xinqu Hospital mistook Mr Wang for another chap with a bad case of the pink grapes and whisked …

  1. Paul Woodhouse

    damn, if that had happened in America who would the Drs have had to sue to get paid?

    1. Charles 9 Silver badge

      They'd probably have to write it off. The traveler will likely never be in a position to pay, and all remaining parties can cite legal protection or sovereignty.

  2. Ken 16 Silver badge
    Coat

    Bring out the comfy chair!

    never was there a more appropriate time to say that...

    1. Commswonk Silver badge

      Re: Bring out the comfy chair!

      Don't forget the... soft cushions

  3. Baldy50

    The backpacker spoke neither German nor English!

    Nobody in Germany speaks Chinese or any of those services involved even tried an interpretor to ascertain this poor blokes status?

    Go to nearest Chinese embassy!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      I think they actually went to the nearest chinese restaurant!

      I either made that up to amuse myself and now can't remember doing it or did actually read it. Either way, I'm sticking to it unless proven wrong.

      1. phuzz Silver badge
        Meh

        According to this article, they went to the nearest Chinese restaurant, "who advised him to use a mobile phone translation app to communicate with the tourist"

        So half right?

    2. Ian Emery Silver badge
      Boffin

      Chinese restaraunt, good idea, but...

      One big problem, Most of the Chinese outside of China speak what we call Cantonese; but for the last 40 odd years, the official language taught in schools in mainland China is what we call Mandarin; unless the man was old enough, or came from Hong Kong, Guangdong or Guangzhi provinces, he wouldnt have spoken a word of Cantonese.

      Writing might have helped, the written language only has two versions, Traditional (a bit like UK English), and Simplified (a bit like US English), but again, Traditional is used mostly by Chinese OUTSIDE of mainland China, as their parents left before Mao enforced the simplified version.

      it is true though the Chinese are brainwashed from birth into doing whatever someone in any type of uniform/authority tells them to do (except traffic cop).

      1. Stevie Silver badge

        Re: Chinese restaraunt, good idea, but...

        Bah and double bah!

        English, delivered loudly and slowly, is unversally understood by all foreigners.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Chinese restaraunt, good idea, but...

          But does that work for German?

          And who is going to be the first to do a good "Hitler Rant" of this?

          1. PNGuinn
            Trollface

            But does that work for German?

            Who cares? I've proved it works with the french.

            The language of a drunk about to expire - as opposed to the language of a drunk about to explode.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Chinese restaraunt, good idea, but...

          >English, delivered loudly and slowly, is unversally understood by all foreigners.

          MY HOVERCRAFT IS FULL OF EELS!!!

      2. This post has been deleted by its author

      3. PhilipN Silver badge

        Re: Chinese restaraunt, good idea, but...

        Precisely WTF are you talking about?

      4. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Chinese restaraunt, good idea, but...

        Traditional (a bit like UK English), and Simplified (a bit like US English)

        Hahaha. I better make some popcorn while I watch that one :).

      5. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
        Coffee/keyboard

        Re: Chinese restaraunt, good idea, but...

        "Traditional (a bit like UK English), and Simplified (a bit like US English),"

        You, sir, owe me a new keyboard! I really hate it when coffee erupts from my nose!!!

  4. Tikimon Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    Much less likely in America, paranoia rules here

    Over here, when you check in they label you with a wristband. It has your name and a host of other information, plus a bar code. You are asked to make sure every bit of info is correct before they put it on you. At every step of the process thereafter, by almost every staff member you interact with, they will check the band. Then you are asked your full name and a few other questions to make sure they have the band on the correct person and the correct procedure in the works. If you're out of it, they scan the band and read it themselves.

    It's frankly annoying to experience, being asked the same thing over and over. However, it's cut way down on the wrong procedure wrong person mistakes and helps protect me from that sort of mistake. So really, I don't mind.

    1. Jonathan 27 Bronze badge

      Yeah...

      I think it would be much less likely in America, even if there weren't any more rules. The average American who is asked to undress and lie down on a table when they're in to witness their wife giving birth says "no way in hell".

      P.S. I don't think this guy should have to pay a dime, in the USA he would be able to sue the hospital for damages.

      1. Bucky 2
        Coat

        Re: Yeah...

        That depends on how good-looking the person who's asking is.

    2. Arthur the cat Silver badge

      Re: Much less likely in America, paranoia rules here

      Over here, when you check in they label you with a wristband.

      Last time I had an op here in the UK (couple of years back) I had a band on each wrist, and they were the red striped allergy warning ones, just because I said I get hay fever.

      1. AndrueC Silver badge
        Joke

        Re: Much less likely in America, paranoia rules here

        I had a band on each wrist, and they were the red striped allergy warning ones, just because I said I get hay fever.

        What was written on them - "nil hay by mouth"?

    3. disgustedoftunbridgewells Silver badge

      Re: Much less likely in America, paranoia rules here

      Last time I went to a hospital ( Provincial UK ), about a year or two ago for a suspected broken ankle, I was given an A4 sheet full of lots of barcodes.

      1. Ian Emery Silver badge

        Re: Much less likely in America, paranoia rules here

        Last time I was in a UK hospital for an op, I had the op.

        Then they proceeded to put me back in the wrong bed, and less than 5 minutes later another crew turned up to take me for ANOTHER, more permanent op.

        I was barely concious enough to protest; (lucky that the NHS is so stingy with general anaesthetic), and delayed them just long enough for the guy who should have been in the bed to come back from the toilet and back me up..

  5. pele

    If you don't know what to write about in IT then pick a random topic poking fun at foreign political systems. Don't even bother looking at your own. Ever. And casually forget about the prime reason for your own existence. Oh and don't forget the sarcasm.

    1. Swarthy Silver badge
      FAIL

      I believe I speak for all the downvoters

      BOOTNOTES

    2. Youngone Silver badge

      @ pele

      Look Mr. Pele, we all admired your great skills while playing football, but the rules are different at El Reg.

      As another commentard has pointed out: BOOTNOTES

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Pele - perhaps you may benefit from a trip to a Chinese hospital?

      They may manage to remove your head from your own ass for long enough for you to gain an awareness of your surroundings and a sense of humour. I'm not optimistic that the procedure will be permanent, but we can hope.

      Good luck!

  6. quxinot
    Coat

    Agreed!

    That said, I figured it was about removing Windows 10....

    Mine's the one with a Debian CD in the pocket.

  7. Arthur the cat Silver badge
    Boffin

    I bet he's glad it was a haemorrhoidectomy rather than an orchidectomy.

    1. Alister Silver badge

      I bet he's glad it was a haemorrhoidectomy rather than an orchidectomy.

      I've only ever heard of a conjurer managing to extract flowers from someone's rear orifice.

      And no, I couldn't be arsed to look up what an orchidectomy is, so balls...

      1. Oengus Silver badge

        And no, I couldn't be arsed to look up what an orchidectomy is, so balls...

        Couldn't be arsed to look it up but still got it in one... (or in a bad case both)...

  8. boltar Silver badge

    So did he have piles or not?

    We need to be told!

    Seriously, you'd think one of the surgeons might have noticed if they weren't there and thought "hold on a minute...".

  9. Fink-Nottle

    While it's sad ...

    that Mr Wang had his piles removed involuntarily, spare a thought for poor Mr Piles.

    1. Commswonk Silver badge

      Re: While it's sad ...

      Congratulations; you have just won the internet. Another instance where single upvotes are simply not enough.

    2. Antron Argaiv Silver badge
      Mushroom

      Re: While it's sad ...

      Sadly for Mr. Wang, the intended patient had checked the "no anesthesia" box on his forms...

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Maybe it is a culture thing but if I'm not expecting surprise anal intervention then it does not take place, no ifs or butts.

    I can't believe he had to pay half for the op, talk about piling it on. Did they actually find piles? I'm guessing they must have.

    1. Robert Carnegie Silver badge

      I think the story is that they paid him, but a lot less than you'd expect for medical negligence since they say it was substantially his fault as well.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "most read"

    to the right of these comments as I read, there's a link to a story pointing out danger of golden backdoor keys ...

  12. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
    IT Angle

    IT angle?

    Move along now, nothing to see here

  13. Alistair Silver badge

    *urph*

    When the youngest was about to be born I got a wristband that more or less matched my wife's.

    Had to show that to get wee bugger out of the nursery, and a couple of times security asked to see our bands whilst I was wandering about the horsepistol with him in the snugli.

    We left chocolates, doughnuts and coffee for the nurses after 5 days in maternity.

    1. Anonymous IV

      Re: *urph*

      > We left chocolates, doughnuts and coffee for the nurses after 5 days in maternity.

      Those poor nurses, having to spend all that time in the maternity ward.

      And then to be faced with doughnuts and chocolates.

    2. Antron Argaiv Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: *urph*

      Yup. Taking care of those who take care of you is important.

      Must be a daily diet battle for the nurses, though.

    3. Charles 9 Silver badge

      Re: *urph*

      "Had to show that to get wee bugger out of the nursery, and a couple of times security asked to see our bands whilst I was wandering about the horsepistol with him in the snugli."

      Blame that on too many instances of baby-snatching, some of them by women who could swear up and down (and pass a polygraph in so doing) that the baby is hers even when the DNA tests don't match.

  14. AndrueC Silver badge
    Joke

    At least this article gets right to the bottom of things.

  15. Marketing Hack Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Fortunately, his wife wasn't delivering at the other hospital

    The one with the sex reassignment clinic...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Fortunately, his wife wasn't delivering at the other hospital

      I can't find a link, but that actually happened to some guy in Boston, last year I think. Went in for a circumcision, and they removed the whole damn thing.

      1. Soruk

        Re: Fortunately, his wife wasn't delivering at the other hospital

        Not quite last year, but...

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Reimer

  16. Dead Parrot

    I want to know...

    ...about the other guy. Who went in to get his piles sorted, and won a free baby.

  17. elDog Silver badge

    Alls well that ends well

    Apostrophe Sheriff here.

    Should be "All'swell that end'swell".

    And in this bloke's case there was plenty of swelling in the end.

    1. ChrisBedford
      FAIL

      Re: Alls well that ends well

      Alls well that ends well

      Apostrophe Sheriff here.

      Should be "All'swell that end'swell"

      all's well yes, but

      end's well <-- where did you get this from? Or was this a joke i didn't get.

      Seriously, if you are going to appoint yourself the apostrophe sheriff surely you should get your facts straight. I end, you end, he ends; we end, you end, they end. Straight verb conjugation, which has never taken an apostrophe and only now gets one in "Grocer's English".

  18. thomas k

    Not fun, and then ...

    Well, I hope they gave the poor chap more than a few days supply of acetaminophen plus codeine and, when he ran out and asked for more, they didn't tell him to just take Tylenol.

    If it was the doctor who had that operation, they'd prescribe themselves a couple months of an oxy.

    1. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

      Re: Not fun, and then ...

      > Tylenol

      Aka - paracetamol. It' ain't called tylenol round 'ere y'know.

      This is a local site for local people!

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Coat

        Re: Not fun, and then ...

        Why not Arseprin?

  19. Paul Woodhouse

    of Healthcare in mainland China, my experience is limited to a single Dentist in LuoYang about 15 years ago, he was very good and professional, and I got the impression that he wasn't impressed with the fillings and work I'd had done previously in the UK..

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