back to article You think Donald Trump is insecure? Check out his online store

Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump has been widely and repeatedly mocked for being thin-skinned; something not helped by his compulsive need to insult anyone who criticizes him. But if you thought The Donald was insecure, just check out his online store at DonaldTrump.com. Despite being an alleged billionaire and …

  1. Chika
    Coat

    But...

    ...he has promised to build a wall (and make the Mexicans pay for it!)

    1. cd

      Re: But...

      Everything he ever built someone else paid for.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: But...

        >Yuge security flaws, the best kind of security flaws, guaranteed incredible flaws

        Forgot the believe me at the end.

      2. Pascal Monett Silver badge

        Re: Everything he ever built someone else paid for.

        Everything he ever conned someone else into paying for.

        FTFY

      3. PassiveSmoking

        @cd

        Would you like some soothing cream? Because that was a burn

      4. Dabooka Silver badge

        Re: But...

        @CD

        'Everything he ever built someone else paid for.'

        and the Mexicans built for him.

    2. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: But...

      Ah, Trump. Making America grate again...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Ah, Trump. Making America grate again..

        I wasn't sure whether this was a Molesworth reference or just a pun. Then I realized I could upvote you either way.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: But...

      I guess he was waiting for the Mexicans to pony up for the SSL cert.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: But...

      If we're talking about stuff Trump "made", I like the fact that his campaign gear has to state "100% Made in the USA".

      Guess you can't get away with having your clothes made in China and- hypocrisy of hypocrisies- Mexico now, can you?

  2. Big John Silver badge
    Unhappy

    Outrage

    Okay, I was willing to forgive a lot, but now Trump has gone too far! I'm switching my vote to Hillary. At least her online store is secure, if nothing else!

    1. NotBob

      Re: Outrage

      Plus, if someone wants to get your personal info from Hillary, 50/50 she'll "accidentally delete" it.

  3. Dadmin
    Thumb Up

    Where is the certificate?!?1?!

    Oops, I mean where are Trump's and his wife's birth certificates? I think one of them is one of those darn foreigner-types, and not the kind that like the band of the same name from the 1980s. I'm pretty sure the other one is too. How did they get in the country?! We must build a wall to protect us from Scotland and Russia, and then ourselves.

    HAHA! I make big joke, of course, comrade. Everyone knows his wife is part KGB, so no problem. No hackers are going to be visiting from United States of Russia. It is known.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Where is the certificate?!?1?!

      His wife is from FYR Slovenia, it's in the EU and NATO... and used to be part of Yugoslavia.

      Other Yugo-links:- Madeleine Albright. Her original name is Marie Jana Korbelova , from Prague, Czechoslovakia. She used to live for a while in Belgrade while it was still in Yugoslavia :D

      1. andreas koch

        @ac - Re: Where is the certificate?!?1?!

        ...

        Prague, former Czechoslovakia

        ...

        FTFY

  4. Ken Hagan Gold badge

    You realise this makes you a terrorist, Reg

    Does this mean there is a way of selectively targetting Trump supporters for wallet-emptying shenanigans?

    1. Big John Silver badge

      Re: You realise this makes you a terrorist, Reg

      Terrorist is a harsh word. Shame on you.

      Still, it is low-class of Trump not to have covered this point. He's a businessman!

      His Presidency will definitely be a work-in-progress. Fun times.

      1. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

        Re: You realise this makes you a terrorist, Reg

        If by some chance he gets elected, the only wall he'll build will be the one around the White House.

        Gotta keep the CIC Safe haven't they?

        After yet another foopah (about the dead Muslim Captain) IMHO, no Serving or Former member of the US Military should vote for him. All he cares about is how much money being President can make him.

        1. MiguelC Silver badge

          "Foopah"

          From the Urban Dictionary:

          Foopah: The really discusting [SIC] stomach-type thing you see fat people have that cover's they're whole entire groin area. Often referred to as front butt or front vagina. May also be referred to as Foop.

          Me thinks you may have meant "Faux pas"...

          1. Kane Silver badge
            Thumb Up

            Re: "Foopah"

            'Me thinks you may have meant "Faux pas"...'

            No, no, I think he's right on the money there.

          2. Kubla Cant Silver badge

            Re: "Foopah"

            I think you missed a few [sic]s: that cover's [sic] they're [sic] whole entire [sic] groin area.

          3. Huw D

            Re: "Foopah"

            c.f. "The Gunt"

        2. Big John Silver badge

          Re: You realise this makes you a terrorist, Reg

          "After yet another foopah (about the dead Muslim Captain)..."

          It's not about any dead Captain (much as the Dems want it to be), it's about his dad, who happens to be tied to the Clinton foundation and who directly benefits from rich Saudis paying him to get them into the US.

          That dad was trotted out to smear Trump in the convention hall, and now is begging to be allowed to fade back into obscurity. I guess the truth hurts a little too much? He should have considered that before libeling Don by calling him a "black soul" while being so politically vulnerable himself.

          This guy's background was easily searchable online, but no one on the Left felt the need to do so. Why should they, when their voters are so easily led by the nose?

      2. Captain Badmouth
        Happy

        Re: You realise this makes you a terrorist, Reg

        "Still, it is low-class of Trump not to have covered this point. He's a businessman!"

        Nonsense, security costs money.

        Haven't you learned anything reading these pages?

  5. robert lindsay
    FAIL

    This isnt a security flaw.

    Their is no security to begin with.

  6. Erik4872

    Classic Reg

    Whoever came up with the strapline for the article deserves kudos - I LOL'd. You even got the sentence fragments down pat.

    That said, this is further proof that political campaigns don't exactly employ the highest-caliber IT security geniuses on the planet. The Hillary e-mail server thing was just an "executive privilege" thing we see all the time in big-company IT, but what about all these email leaks from the DNC and others? I understand that exposing things to the Internet means they're likely to be exploited at some point, but I thought secure email was pretty much a solved problem these days. Unless of course, you use "12345" as your password...

    1. fidodogbreath Silver badge

      Re: Classic Reg

      political campaigns don't exactly employ the highest-caliber IT security geniuses on the planet

      The presidential campaign process has not put forth any high caliber personnel this year...candidates included.

  7. Fehu
    Mushroom

    Nothing on there worth stealing.

    Except maybe some pictures of his latest mail order bride, and you can download those for free.

    1. Big John Silver badge

      Re: Nothing on there worth stealing.

      At long last! A President that doesn't induce deep slumber!

      Sex! The Mob! Bad hair! Bring. It. ON.

      1. sabroni Silver badge
        Facepalm

        Re: A President that doesn't induce deep slumber!

        Even better, one that causes you to wake in the middle of the night in a cold sweat! Awesome! I love the fear of global war!!!!

      2. Chika

        Re: Nothing on there worth stealing.

        Oooooook!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Nothing on there worth stealing.

      She is all of 46 and they got married 11 years ago after being an item for 7 years, not exactly standard mail-order bride. She was working as a model in Paris Milan and NYC for 3+ years before she met him.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Don't.... Don't You Want Trump?

        "She was working as a model in Paris Milan and NYC for 3+ years before she met him."

        Guess it beats working as a waitress in a cocktail bar (when he met her).

        Odd that Ivana Trump was a former model as well. Seems that every so often when his current wife gets too old, Trump likes to trade her in for a...

        (sunglasses)

        ...newer model.

        YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!

    3. This post has been deleted by a moderator

      1. sabroni Silver badge

        Re: She better looking than Michelle Obama and Hilary Clinton

        She indeed better looking, that what look for in first lady! Likewise president should funny hair and constantly contradict themselves. No fun if policy consistent from day to day....

  8. Chewi
    Headmaster

    Not entirely true

    It only switches away from HTTPS if you click on a product link. The menu links work fine. This is because the product links have absolute URLs. A schoolboy error but easily fixed. They surely meant to use SSL as the certificate is valid and it's not a wildcard. Apart from the product links, I'd say the only thing they should have done is redirect to the SSL site by default. I hate Trump as much as the next guy but let's stick to the facts.

    On that note, if you want a real scoop, check the SSL Labs results. Clinton gets an A, Trump gets a C!

    1. Vincent Ballard
      FAIL

      Re: Not entirely true

      If you mean to use SSL, you should use HSTS.

      1. Chika

        Re: Not entirely true

        He Says Total Shite

  9. Youngone Silver badge

    I get it now

    So that's the reason for him standing.

    He's going to make billions selling tat to idiots.

    1. Flocke Kroes Silver badge

      That was the old plan

      Trump was profiting from the primaries by spending campaign money on Trump businesses. Trump's self funded campaign got money from (initially unsolicited) donations and from loans from Donald Trump. Right up to the nominating convention in Cleveland, Trump could have mostly repaid himself from contributions. Only when the Republican party was irreversibly committed to nominating Trump did he forgive the loans.

      The fun part is that Trump might have taken the plunge at the peak of his polling. Americans start taking an interest in their elections at different times. Some will wait for the debates, others waited for the conventions. Only the truly committed followed from the start of the primaries. During the primaries, each party feuds with itself. That is supposed to end at the convention which is used to heal the party's rifts and convince the supporters of the other candidates to accept the nominee.

      Trump made his commitment before the Democrat's convention started, and before the Republican convention finished. The polls would have included thoroughly disgruntled Bernie supporters and and Republicans who had not yet looked at who their candidate really is. The Democrats reduced their spending on Trump bashing adverts before the Republican convention. Perhaps they were afraid that if they worked too hard, Trump would not get nominated, and Trump was doing an excellent job of convincing Republicans to vote Hillary. Trump's convention highlighted and widened the divisions in his party, and convinced many senior Republicans to endorse Hillary. When the polling reflects that, Trump will be looking for someone to blame.

      1. Kiwi
        Trollface

        Re: That was the old plan

        When the polling reflects that, Trump will be looking for someone to blame.

        His parents would be a good place for him to start...

    2. sabroni Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: He's going to make billions selling tat to idiots.

      Works for Apple.......

      1. fruitoftheloon
        Happy

        @Sabroni: Re: He's going to make billions selling tat to idiots.

        Sabroni,

        I recently bought a MBP, does that make me an idiot?

        Ooi I think iphones are ludicrously overpriced, each to his own eh?

        Jay

        1. sabroni Silver badge

          Re: @Sabroni: I recently bought a MBP, does that make me an idiot?

          Dunno about making you an idiot, that depends why you bought it and what it cost you, but it sounds like you have difficulty spotting a joke.

          Enjoy your laptop!

          Sab

          1. fruitoftheloon
            Pint

            @Sab: Re: @Sabroni: I recently bought a MBP, does that make me an idiot?

            Sab,

            Apols for missing your joke (sleep deprivation...)

            We had a lenovo u330 & win 8.1 which was OK, i ran out of patience re the shite wi-fi, over a protracted 6 week 'repair' John Lewis couldn't get it sorted, so we received a 100% refund (not bad as by then it was out of the initial 1-year warranty).

            Having had enough of windows narking me off, we put the £600 refund towards the MBP, which now ironically runs win 7 via parallels (for VS).

            Hope that makes sense, btw have one on me.

            Cheers,

            Jay

            1. sabroni Silver badge
              Happy

              Re: @Sab: @Sabroni: I recently bought a MBP, does that make me an idiot?

              No woz! Sounds like a good purchase though I'm not sure what macs're like for Windows use (had to use a mac keyboard recently and it drove me to disruption!!) My boss at my old place used to swear by Macs in terms of them being robust machines so hopefully you'll get good use out of it!

              Good old John Lewis though! Full refund over a year after purchase is sweet!

  10. Mark 85 Silver badge

    Well, why not...

    He outsources almost everything overseas...maybe the website was outsourced there also.

  11. disgruntled yank Silver badge

    Trump-Pence dog coat.

    Dammit, now I'm going to be humming "I've got Trump-Pence, jolly, jolly Trump-Pence" for the rest of the afternoon.

    1. nijam Silver badge

      Re: Trump-Pence dog coat.

      Other trump-related words come to mind (we already all know the "I am fartacus"-related ones, of course).

      How about trumpanned to describe his supporters, an elision of trump and trepanned, for example? Is there scope for a competition here?

      1. Jame_s

        Re: Trump-Pence dog coat.

        due to his resemblance to a certain historical itallian leader, i am henceforth referring to the trumphole as "il douche"

  12. This post has been deleted by its author

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    They seem to have it mostly fixed now.

    Looks like they've set up a redirect; though a few assets from their cdn are still http (the made in USA logo...) .

  14. This post has been deleted by a moderator

    1. Someone Else Silver badge

      Re: Over the pond view

      Well, perhaps you "over-the-ponders" might learn that "Colored" (spelled the right way) hasn't been used on this side of the pond in reference to folks of the Negroid race since the middle 60's...unless, of course, you a fucking racist moron and damn proud of it.

      Please try to keep up.

      1. 's water music Silver badge
        Unhappy

        Re: Over the pond view

        Well, perhaps you "over-the-ponders" might learn that "Colored" (spelled the right way) hasn't been used on this side of the pond in reference to folks of the Negroid race since the middle 60's...unless, of course, you a fucking racist moron and damn proud of it.

        "Coloured" is pretty much the province of 'racist Nans' over here too. I used to have to try to discourage my mother-in-law from using it. FWIW I fear Michael Moore may be right and Trump will win for the same damn fool reasons we voted fro Brexit. Kind of for the lulz but with more bitterness.

        1. fruitoftheloon
          Stop

          @s water: Re: Over the pond view

          S water,

          I voted for Brexit for very good reasons.

          I wasn't aware that I should have sought your sage guidance and opinions first before doing so...

          Ooi why shouldn't I have voted to leave the EU?

          Cheers,

          Jay

          1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

            Re: @s water: Over the pond view

            "Ooi why shouldn't I have voted to leave the EU?"

            You'll just have to hope you don't find out in due course.

            1. fruitoftheloon
              Happy

              @Doctor syntax: Re: @s water: Over the pond view

              DS,

              which would be what exactly???

              Cheers,

              Jay

          2. 's water music Silver badge
            Joke

            Re: @s water: Over the pond view

            I voted for Brexit for very good reasons.

            I wasn't aware that I should have sought your sage guidance and opinions first before doing so...

            Well you'll know for next time then

            :-)

        2. Big John Silver badge

          Re: Over the pond view

          "Coloured" is pretty much the province of 'racist Nans' over here too.

          If some hue-challenged parrot insists on using the "Coloured" appellation, just throw "Uncoloured" right back at 'em.

      2. Uncle Slacky Silver badge
        Stop

        Re: Over the pond view

        What does NAACP stand for again?

  15. dayglored

    Already fixed, sort of

    There's a valid SSL cert dated 7/30 (two days ago) on the site now. Not clear that HTTP is redirected automatically to HTTPS, though. They still have work to do.

  16. Steve Knox Silver badge
    FAIL

    "In this small victory, it was El Reg wot won it."

    https://www.theregister.co.uk

    ...

    Nope, The Register is still losing when it comes to https.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: "In this small victory, it was El Reg wot won it."

      It is not as if this site is raising money for an election campain now is it?

      {Or is it?}

      Where do I put my CC details, my SSN and every other bit of data about myself?

    2. sabroni Silver badge

      Re: Nope, The Register is still losing when it comes to https.

      When I buy stuff online I expect https. When I read the news I don't care if it's http.

      Is the Reg shop http?

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

    3. EvadingGrid

      Re: "In this small victory, it was El Reg wot won it."

      LOL - meanwhile, if anybody actually bothered to try https://shop.donaldjtrump.com/ . . . .

  17. Allan George Dyer Silver badge
    Joke

    Make America Great Again

    It occurs to me that the last time America was called great, it was part of Great Britain and colonies. Is this Trump's secret agenda? If elected, will he be holding negotiations with the Queen?

    1. Nick Ryan Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: Make America Great Again

      No. He'll be holding negotiations with Prince Philip.

  18. Jamie Jones Silver badge
    Stop

    The threat is over exaggerated

    Yes, yes, http isn't encrypted and is insecure, but it still doesn't mean open the whole database is going to be readily available to the public!

    Assuming the user isn't using a passwordless public wifi access point without a vpn, to get the session data, you'd need to tap in to the connection somewhere - preferably as cose to the server as possible.

    I don't think you'd be able to bribe someone at an ISP/transit site with the details of a few redneck trumpies!

    Anyway, it would then be only the users connections being eavesdropped on - hardly blanket access to the whole db!

  19. Someone Else Silver badge
    Facepalm

    You.

    Can't.

    Make.

    This.

    Shit.

    Up!

    1. EvadingGrid

      Oh yes they did - TRY IT --> https://shop.donaldjtrump.com/

      Also try https://theregister.co.uk

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Not insecure

    Just free speech for data!

  21. Da Weezil

    The thing is... every time I see that guy on TV it reminds me of the jew producer character from "Drawn Together" A very good parody IMHO

    "ohhh its a big one... 2 towels"

  22. Mystic Megabyte Silver badge
    Stop

    #obnoxious_arsehole

    Is all that Trump crap made in China?

    1. Pascal Monett Silver badge
      Coat

      Nah, Mexico.

  23. 0laf Silver badge

    With added Freedum

    Encryption is unAmerican

    Mmmmmkay

  24. Slx

    Despite flushing the cache several times, my browser still feels dirty after visiting that website.

    I think I'm going to need a new laptop.

    1. Big John Silver badge

      "I think I'm going to need a new laptop."

      I think you should get one. How could you ever look at your old one again without shuddering, after having seen HIS face on there?

      Better take a sledgehammer to it, just to be sure.

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Another day, another Kieren McCarthy SJW piece...

    Kieren,

    Where's the article on the piss-poor DNC security that allowed them to get hacked in the first place? Surely you're not pushing the same tired SJW agenda that you always do?

    Oh, you're from San Francisco.

    Okay then.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Another day, another Kieren McCarthy SJW piece...

      Yeah, where're all the articles promoting injustice! We need some balance!!!

      Oh, you're an anonymous trump astroturfer.

      Okay then.

      1. Big John Silver badge

        Re: Another day, another Kieren McCarthy SJW piece...

        Astroturfing costs a lot of money. Why do you think Hillary took all those massive bribes?

  26. lansalot

    PAH!

    How dare you take credit for this, El-Reg...????

    Don't you know - he ALONE CAN SOLVE!

  27. noddybollock

    Wolly T's & C's

    "Additionally, from time to time, we may share your voluntarily provided information to like-minded organizations. "

    But no mention of who they are - so you can check their T's & C's

  28. Alistair Silver badge
    Windows

    Trumpencert.

    Another case of devops perhaps?

    as in

    Deveolpment site became the operational site?

    <Title. New torture process for renditioned turrist hagents?>

  29. Mr.Mischief

    Cheeto Jesus

    But why make things difficult for Cheeto Jesus' Russian hack squad?

    1. Big John Silver badge

      Re: Cheeto Jesus

      If you get to call Don "Cheeto Jesus" then I get to call Hillary "PIAPS".

  30. Tatsky

    They've left the non https canonical tag in there.

    It's just a shopify site at the end of the day, and what this proves is that it doesn't matter how good the tool is, a user with no clue will still muck it up.

    They've got google site validation and GA in there, and the aforementioned canonical, so someone had a good go at setting this up, but no cigar.

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2019