back to article Bletchley finds Hitler plain text war machine on Ebay, buys for £10

A World War II teleprinter Hitler used in strategic communications with generals has been bought on eBay for £9.50. The teleprinter more was noticed and snapped up by keen eyes at the National Museum of Computing at Bletchley Park. The precious machine was languishing in a Southend, Essex shed covered in rubbish. The plain- …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hitler, not Hilter....

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Coat

      Indeed. As everyone knows, Mr Hilter is living peacefully in Folkstone at the moment and planning an European tour (with an extended stay in the Brussels-Strasbourg bicephalic capital)

    2. Fr. Ted Crilly

      well, Dickie Hilter must keep in touch with the National Bocialist party office while the count for the North Minehead by by-election is in progress.

      besides, historically Taunton is a part of Minehead!

      1. Rich 11 Silver badge

        besides, historically Taunton is a part of Minehead!

        Damn your eyes, sir, with your revisionist history! All true Taunton residents know that you wish to claim Taunton for Minehead only so that you can continue your foul custom of sticking two fingers up at residents with a chromosome-pair count different from your own.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Hitler Ah yes, ve make a little hike for, for Bideford.

        Johnson (leaning over map) Oh well, you'll want the A39 then...no, no, you've got the wrong map there, this is Stalingrad, you want the Ilfracombe and Barnstaple section.

        Hitler Ah! Hein...Reginald you have the wrong map here you silly old leg-before-wicket English person.

        Himmler I'm sorry mein Fuhrer. I did not...(Hitler slaps him) Mein Dickie old chum.

        Landlady Lucky Mr Johnson pointed that out, eh? You wouldn't have had much fun in Stalingrad, would you...(they don't see the joke) I said, you wouldn't have had much fun in Stalingrad, would you, ha, ha, ha?

        Hitler (through clenched teeth) Not much fun in Stalingrad, no.

  2. chivo243 Silver badge
    Happy

    One man's trash

    Is a treasure for history!

  3. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Trollface

    Touched by HITLER!

    Its has an extra-large NEIN key!

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Headmaster

    Hispter bait

    Think of the hipster chic of sitting in Starbucks, typing on Hitler's own personal typewriter.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Hispter bait

      That would be "StarbuckSS" then?

      1. TeeCee Gold badge
        Coat

        Re: Hispter bait

        "What are you doing? Who the hell would want Hazlenut syrup in a latte?"

        "I am only following orders."

    2. Fr. Ted Crilly

      Re: Hispter bait

      reports for der Fuhrer were prepared on special fuhrer typewriters with larger text, aside for the bleedin obvious personal failings (irony), der fuhrer was vain about wearing his glasses...

  5. Esme

    Erm..

    Won't the Norwegian Armed Forces museum be wantingt it back?

    from El Reg's article:

    "For clarification: teleprinter found in Essex. Lorenz SZ42 encryption machine on long loan from Norwegian Armed Forces Museum."

    1. AIBailey

      Re: Erm..

      I think after reading the article, that the sentence below implies that it's the Lorenz machine that's actually the thing on loan from Norway, not the teleprinter. It's not the clearest of articles.

      "Paired with a Lorenz SZ42 machine on display in Bletchley and on loan from Norway, the two devices will be part of the complete story of how the allies broke Germany's encrypted communications."

  6. wolfetone Silver badge

    "The teleprinter more was noticed and snapped up by keen eyes at the National Museum of Computing at Bletchley Park."

    Keen eyes my arse. They were bored during lunchtime and thought they'd have a look at what mad crap was being sold on eBay.

    1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge

      So now they have a good excuse whenever the bosses see them trawling eBay. Win-win situation if ever there was one

      1. Fink-Nottle

        > Win-win situation if ever there was one

        Except for the seller, who let a fortune slip through her fingers.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Except for the seller, who let a fortune slip through her fingers.

          There is something quite distasteful about the idea of making money out of such relics. Methinks if the seller knew its history they would have simply donated it to a relevant museum.

          1. Andy Taylor

            The teleprinter is of a widely-used design, manufactured by the Lorenz company under licence from a US company. From the eBay listing and its single photo, it wasn't clear how old or what type it was.

            My colleagues at the museum didn't realise it was a German WW2 vintage military teleprinter until after they got it back to the workshop for cleaning and found the Reich Adler stamp on it.

            1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

              ...and it turned out it was just a BOY fashionista design

          2. John 104

            People profit from these things all the time. Museums too.

          3. lpcollier

            eBay would have removed it

            The selling of Nazi war memorabilia is not allowed on eBay, so if the seller had realised what it was they certainly wouldn't have been able to see via eBay.

    2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      "Keen eyes my arse."

      An interesting anatomical anomaly.

  7. Chris King Silver badge

    I feel a Downfall pardody coming on...

    Anyone who isn't an eBay PowerSeller or Above Standard, leave now.

    WHAT WERE YOU THINKING ?! NOW WE'RE GOING TO BE UP TO OUR NECKS IN SODDING HIPSTERS, TELLING EVERYBODY THEY WERE DOING CRYPTOGRAPHY BEFORE IT WAS COOL !

    1. AceRimmer1980
      Devil

      Re: I feel a Downfall pardody coming on...

      But Mein Fuhrer, they must have been using autosniping software.

  8. hatti

    I wonder

    I wonder if there's a message on it which details a mission to be carried out on the 24th June 2016.

    ...--- codename CAMMERKL ---

  9. Duffaboy
    Joke

    £9.50

    and £100,000 for P&P

  10. Stoneshop Silver badge
    Joke

    advertised as a telegram machine

    "Item not as described, parts missing, not working"

    1. Roland6 Silver badge

      Re: advertised as a telegram machine

      Re: Missing part

      Details can be found here, along with a photo!

      http://www.tnmoc.org/news/notes-museum/lorenz-sz42missing-motor?platform=hootsuite

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Turns out it's a prototype for the upcoming Surface 5

    Bletchley Park last heard trying to get their money back.

  12. Tom 64

    Can someone tell me,

    what on Earth was this thing doing in Essex in the first place!?

    1. rmason Silver badge

      Re: Can someone tell me,

      I'd imagine the way most of these things do, war trophy/souvenir.

      AKA Half-inched by someone coming home.

      1. KBeee

        Re: Can someone tell me,

        Alexander Baron the WW2 writer once saw a "Liberated" piano on the back of a British tank, so no problem with a teleprinter.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    But..

    Will it run Crysis?

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