Science needs to know
How many eyes did this "trouser snake" have?
A Thai chap's "morning routine of a shower and protracted bowel movement" was rudely interrupted earlier this week when a 4-metre python clamped its laughing gear round his todger as he squatted over the throne. According to an eye-watering report by Khaosod English - (some pics quite possibly NSFW) - Atthaporn Boonmakchuay of …
While understandably screaming, the bleeding 38-year-old did have the presence of mind to call to his missus Sawittree Shooyoung to bring a rope, which he used to lash the serpent's head to the bathroom door.
That is some pretty shrewd thinking under the circumstances. To be in that much pain, and still come up with a plan to rope the snake to the bathroom door is some very smart thinking under the circumstances.
Kinky stuff, but then emergency rooms do see a lot of strange situations.....
My favorite is the one about the poor lad admitted with a severely lacerated "spam javelin" and some localized scalding burns, His wife had serious scalding burns on the top of her head, face and shoulders. Suffice it to say they were next to the stove when a pot of boling water was inadvertently spilled, I will let you fill in the gaps.....
Regardless, I am sure the chatter in this emergency ward was fairly animated in this case, it has to be a first.
I thought they usually killed animals that had acquired a taste for our plump pink/brown/whatever bodies. That should be doubly so given the part it has tasted.
That's usually on the principle that having learned the taste of blood they might want more.
I suspect that this snake may not fall into that category on account of probably (a) having been shat upon from an as yet undetermined height after closing its jaws and (b) having tasted the outside of that appendix before the blood started running, which events may have replaced the usual "Let's do that again" idea with "let's never ever even THINK about that again and see if we can bite some nice animal to lose that aftertaste".
I have a, cough, "sneaking" suspicion it may just have been his wife seeking to reduce the 30 min length of his daily "morning sessions", and it all got a bit out of hand..
It will be called "Snakes in a drain". Samuel L. Jackson will play the plumber and main hero.
But in my version, the pythons head doesn't get roped quickly enough.... or else it slips out of the noose.
I'm still casting for the heroic surgeon who knits it back on. Any suggestions ?
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Maybe he was reading an IT mag at the time and got confused about injecting code in Python.
So there’s probably a lot of design engineers on here so go on guys design a loo with a flap at the output stage for when you’ve finished, could be worth a patent and some bucks.
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