back to article Greybeard monobrow baldies rejoice! Boffins comb out hairy genes

University College London boffins have identified the genes that makes hair go grey, cause baldness and even induce the dreaded monobrow, think they can prevent all from happening. The research is outlined in a paper titled A genome-wide association scan in admixed Latin Americans identifies loci influencing facial and scalp …

  1. Ole Juul Silver badge
    Joke

    "we're a long way from treatments"

    Too bad, I was hoping they'd have something you could slip in someone's drink.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'd much rather have lots of grey hair and a monobrow than looking like Alan Shearer and Danny Murphy on MOD. Stick a cherry on their heads and they look like a pair of tits looking for a snug home in a bra.

    1. Charlie Clark Silver badge
      Coat

      That's weird: I've always thought of them as a pair of dicks! Then there's that hairy twat, Robbie Savage.

      I don't mind a bit of banter along with the football but the BBC is doing a great job of imitating the tabloids.

  3. chivo243 Silver badge
    Windows

    No treatment for me

    I'll stick with my grey hair and beard, thank you. I've yet to grow the monobrow, or unibrow as it is also referred to as.

    My brother and laugh at each other... he's 7 years my junior and is bald, and I am as grey as the old mare. He says look at all that grey hair, and I say at least I still have it...

    1. lawndart

      Re: No treatment for me

      It's a unibrow until you leave full time education. Mature students find their monobrow temporarily becomes a unibrow until they complete their course.

  4. frank ly Silver badge

    It's personality and character that matter

    That's what I say nowadays.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This is brilliant news, I can't wait for my "Shaft" afro pill.

    1. Elmer Phud Silver badge

      But you'll look more like Leo Sayer than Richard Rountree.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Watch your mouth. he's a bad mother trucker.

    2. Tom 13

      Just make sure they don't give you the wrong pill. Imagine winding up with Richard Simmons' afro instead.

  6. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken Silver badge

    I don't mind going grey at all since it looks somewhat dignified and offsets my babyface. (Incidentally, I'm going for the 'overweight George Clooney' in my overall appearance.)

    No, the only hair related problem I have are the hairs that started growing in places where I didn't used to have hair and where I don't need and don't want any. What do I need hairs on my earlobes for? Go home Mother Nature, you are drunk!

    1. Mystereed

      I think hairs are like sycamore seeds, they fall out, float down and take root on ears, shoulders, back etc.

      1. Peter Simpson 1

        Yea, call me when they figure out how to keep the hair on my head from moving to my chest and my back.

  7. Magani
    Linux

    A note to those with grey hair:-

    You've still got hair.

    Penguins don't have hair either.

  8. jake Silver badge

    Whatever.

    SWMBO has put me on notice that if I ever get vain about my appearance, she'll leave me.

    a) I don't believe her, but I'm not prone to that kind of vanity in the first place.

    b) My genetics are my genetics. I relish that reality.

    c) All y'all who care about your hair, get over yourselves.

  9. Graham Marsden
    Happy

    Genetics...

    Some years ago at my grandmother's funeral, someone commented how much myself, my cousins, my uncle and my late father and grandfather all looked like each other. Subsequently, looking back through some family photos, it was the same for my great-grandfather and his brothers.

    All of us went grey at an early age (my hair started greying at about 21) but none of us have lost it or even showed signs of thinning.

    I can live with that :-)

    1. jake Silver badge

      Re: Genetics...

      For the record, Graham, human male hair is genetically linked to the maternal Grandfather.

      1. Tom 13

        Re: human male hair is genetically linked

        That's what I've always heard, but I'm starting to wonder. I recall that grandfather as pretty much solid gray with visible bald spot. I turned 50 last year and the salt is just starting to appear in the pepper, no signs of thinning yet.

        Mostly I'm just counting myself as fortunate.

        Now where's the icon for knocking on wood?

  10. Chewi
    Happy

    Meh

    I was so hung up about losing my hair young and yet when I finally shaved it all off, it was truly liberating. I wish I'd done it sooner. It may not suit everybody but I certainly wouldn't go back. Not anon because it really doesn't bother me any more.

    1. LINCARD1000
      Trollface

      Re: Meh

      There's a certain irony about your Register username and your statement about being all shaved... :-)

      (troll icon in lieu of a 'laugh out loud' or amused equivalent icon)

      1. jake Silver badge

        @ LINCARD1000 (was: Re: Meh)

        You do know that "Chewi" (spelling varies) is the diminutive of the name "Jesus", right? It's quite common, here in Sonoma California. Two of my friends use that handle ...

        1. Chewi

          @jake

          News to me. I wish you hadn't told me that!

      2. Chewi

        Re: Meh

        Yeah, that's the funny thing, they called me Chewbacca at school because I was the first to get facial hair. It stuck and later got shortened. By the time I realised it should have been Chewie, it was too late to change it. I feel I've earned the name in my own right after all these years.

  11. Little Mouse
    Pint

    The Big Yin

    Rember Billy Connolly's piece about his pubes?

    "I don't mind them going grey, but Jesus!, I hope I don't go bald!"

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Dr Evil

      There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it

      1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge
        Coat

        Re: Dr Evil

        I highly suggest you try it

        Be careful...

        http://www.amazon.com/Veet-Hair-Removal-Creme-200ml/product-reviews/B000KKNQBK

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    You wouldn't believe the difference it makes

    With a woolly hat on, or hiding under an umbrella, I definitely get *some* looks from some ladies (not a lot, but hey), but in the cold light of day with full balding greyness on show, they *all* flat-out ignore me. It's actually noticeable enough.One glance, they decide "eww, too old", and they look away again like I'm invisible and worthless.

    I'm past caring really, but it still amuses me what a difference it makes.

    So before you accuse people of vanity, just imagine what being totally ignored and written off feels like. Most men still like to feel relevant and not old before their time!

  13. akeane

    It's not grey...

    ... it's SILVER, as I am constantly having to remind my nearest and dearest...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      Re: It's not grey...

      It's not Silver, it Distinguished.

  14. Eddy Ito Silver badge

    If only they could find a gene that would limit the length hair grew to so it was more like fur. How about a nice 15 mm or so? Ah the joys of true low maintenance. If not, I might as well go completely bald including the chin as I've had enough of this cut, trim & shave nonsense.

  15. Vladimir Plouzhnikov

    Ok, so this all is genetic

    But what about hairy palms?

    1. Peter Simpson 1
      Thumb Up

      Re: Ok, so this all is genetic

      Lack of use?

      :-)

  16. To Mars in Man Bras!
    Facepalm

    Get On With It!

    I must have been reading articles about "genetic breakthroughs" related to hair loss, for nearly a decade now. And still no sign of a cure for baldness. I wish these boffins would hurry up. Worrying about how to afford the next month's supply of minoxydil, is making my hair fall out even faster than it was already.

    Icon: Slap Head [geddit!!!!] -------->

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Get On With It!

      "And still no sign of a cure for baldness"

      There's still castration. :)

    2. Tom 13
      Coat

      Re: Get On With It!

      You could always try hair looming for men.

  17. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken Silver badge

    Monobrow revisited

    But, is it lowmonobrow or highmonobrow?

    1. hplasm Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Monobrow revisited

      Are normal eyebrows a stereobrow?

  18. LaeMing Bronze badge
    Megaphone

    Monobrow rights!

    Eyebrows of the world UNITE!

    1. Tom 13

      Re: Monobrow rights!

      I thought the problem was they were already united and were looking for a divorce.

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