back to article Verizon!–Yahoo! takeover! inches! ahead!

Verizon has decided its Yahoo! strategy is important enough to occupy the attention of the CEO of its AOL business unit. Accordingly, Tim Armstrong has been set the task of ringing Marissa Mayer's doorbell, chocolates, flowers and a huge bag of money in hand. Verizon had already (somewhat inexplicably) identified Yahoo! as a …

  1. Charles Manning

    NO CARRIER

    Verizon AOL and Yahoo all together under one umbrella is just too much to comprehend. Just needs geocities to round it out completely.

    My brain started making 1200 baud dial-up noises.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Yuck! I just put my hand in a puddle of corporate DNA...

      ...while looking at the corporate history. So many triumphs along the way, like buying Bebo for $850M and selling it for "scrap" 27 months later (when the best thing you can say of a deal is that the loss made reduced the tax bill then it's a three-ring disaster). And now a whole new round of synergies to be win-winned against the wall...

      Maybe Ted Turner, time traveller, can still save the day?

    2. Dan 55 Silver badge

      Re: NO CARRIER

      Where does that leave Yahoo's international sites and mail given that Verizon isn't very international at all.

      As for dialup noises...

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgqEIp2YmtE

      1. Down not across Silver badge

        Re: NO CARRIER

        Where does that leave Yahoo's international sites and mail given that Verizon isn't very international at all.

        Don't think that is entirely true. Verizon has quite widespread international presence (although only corporate, and not consumer level). After all, it did buy WorldCom, which bought MCI, which bought UUNET, which .. ah you get the idea.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This is a good strategy. They can synergise their remaining brand awareness, and will be well positioned for the retro-internet revival that's just around the corner.

    1. Down not across Silver badge

      retro-internet

      Oh good. I'm starting run out of coasters.

  3. a_yank_lurker Silver badge

    Loons on the loose

    Putrid Palace has many problems some preexisting Melissa by many, many years. What the PHBs at Verizon see in Putrid is at best puzzling at worst - beyond bizarre. The only idea that makes minimal sense is Putrid has a couple parts Verizon is willing to be fleeced for to get. After which they quietly shutter the rest.

    1. Down not across Silver badge

      Re: Loons on the loose

      What the PHBs at Verizon see in Putrid is at best puzzling at worst - beyond bizarre.

      I'd go with beyond bizarre. Perhaps that counts as "growth" on Wall Street or someting equally absurd.

  4. Mark 85 Silver badge

    AOL and now Yahoo! Is owning nostalgia worth billions somehow? Not like these are cars and in pristine condition. So what will be next.. Site Wars II?

  5. Ole Juul Silver badge

    not looking good

    I feel sorry for Yahoo! users.

    1. Robert Helpmann?? Silver badge
      Childcatcher

      Re: not looking good

      I feel sorry for Yahoo! users.

      So pretty much maintaining the status quo, then?

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Firings and taxes

    With Tim Armstrong in charge, the firings would be rapid, at least :-(

    The deal might allow the "reverse spin" to work too.

    http://fortune.com/2016/02/08/verizon-yahoo-alibaba-taxes/?xid=yahoo_fortune

    All rather sad. But Marissa has had her three years, and time's up. For a London employee like myself, lets hope there's money for redundancies.....although despite the noises, I think complete divestment by the US unit would take years.

  7. PJF

    Indai ISP?

    Could this be a way of getting a foothold in the Indian market?!

    .

    Verizon - Ma Bell child - National land-line + cellular

    AOL - old ISP - can they press/copy enough CDs'/floppies for the entire population of

    India (atleast 10x over)

    Yahoo - old search - can/could they be an unbiased search (can't be any worse than

    Zuck/Farce)

    .

  8. Tom 13

    Re: Verizon had already (somewhat inexplicably) identified Yahoo!

    Only if you aren't a Verizon subscriber in the US. Not sure about elsewhere, but in my corner of the world your Verizon email comes form Yahoo!. Verizon doesn't provide it on their own. So at the very least Verizon needs their email service.

    Yeah, Yeah. You and I know it would probably be cheaper to just build a new one out from the ground up (not to mention the improvements in service you'd get), but that isn't in the DNA for one of these big corporations.

  9. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken Silver badge

    Nostalgia

    simply isn't what it used to be anymore...

    While they're at it, they could revive Netscape - I'm looking for something to replace Opera with.

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