back to article Britain beats back Argies over Falklands online land grab

It's been 33 years since the United Kingdom went to war with Argentina and won back the Falkland Islands, but the battle still continues – including online. On Thursday, there was a meeting at the United Nations about the islands that resolved the UK and Argentina should get together and negotiate a solution to the ongoing …

  1. Uberseehandel

    Occupational Therapy For The Mediocre

    This report just shows what time wasting organisations ICANN and IANA really are.

    Latin America in general and Argentina in particular only bang on about the Falklands when their economies are going down the tubes. So no surprise Venezuela is sticking its pica in, then.

    A recent move by the economic disaster that is Argentina is to prevail upon the Chileans to stop sending fresh eggs to the Falklands. Like all incompetent, corrupt economies it wants something for nothing (possibility of oil around the Falklands) and needs to distract its citizens from slow motion train crash that is domestic life.To say nothing of a tendency to assassinate those individuals who disclose what might be termed inconvenient truths.

    Who would believe that less than 100 years ago Argentina was one of the most powerful economies in the world, where did it all go wrong? (http://www.economist.com/news/briefing/21596582-one-hundred-years-ago-argentina-was-future-what-went-wrong-century-decline)

    Incidentally, who is paying for all these waste of space delegates to jet round the world in a rolling beer fest? There are lots better things to do with the money!

    1. Warm Braw Silver badge

      Re: Occupational Therapy For The Mediocre

      Actually, there is no organisation, large or small, that is exempt from these sorts of shenanigans.

      I was once at a meeting of a very modest group of European networking organisations that was almost entirely hijacked by a Greek delegate trying to ensure that, following the break up of Yugoslavia, Macedonia would not be allowed to join the group, or at least not unless the country changed its name. The country had not even applied to join and was unlikely to do so.

      Wherever you have organisations that have national delegates, you will have nationalism. Look on the bright side, though. At least ICANN isn't FIFA.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Occupational Therapy For The Mediocre

        "... At least ICANN isn't FIFA."

        Give it time. They'll probably go the same way. ;)

    2. LucreLout Silver badge

      Re: Occupational Therapy For The Mediocre

      Incidentally, who is paying for all these waste of space delegates to jet round the world in a rolling beer fest?

      Given their power over the internet, you'd think by now they would have learned to use video conferencing. Too many snouts in the trough.

      1. Alan Brown Silver badge

        Re: Occupational Therapy For The Mediocre

        "Given their power over the internet, you'd think by now they would have learned to use video conferencing.!"

        Many of us have been pointing this out for years. ICANN meetings are 99% about troughing, not engineering.

    3. TheVogon Silver badge

      Re: Occupational Therapy For The Mediocre

      If the Argentinians want the Falklands "back" - (British ownership of which actually predates the existence of Argentina) - then the Welsh would like Patagonia back please!

  2. Flocke Kroes Silver badge

    Argies are too late

    .mv is Maldives, .ml is Mali and .ms is Montserrat. The only m's left are mb, mf, mi and mj. They could apply for .malvinas. It would cost plenty, and I cannot see them getting their money back from selling sub-domains.

    1. LucreLout Silver badge

      Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

      They could apply for .malvinas. It would cost plenty, and I cannot see them getting their money back from selling sub-domains.

      I'm not so sure. I'd buy ItsCalledTheFalklandsNotTheFucking.malvinas

      It is politically impossible for any British government to give away that territory now that British blood has soaked its sands. Argentina might as well deal with it because there's nothing they can do about it.

      1. h4rm0ny
        Mushroom

        Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

        >>"It is politically impossible for any British government to give away that territory now that British blood has soaked its sands"

        Why should it be given away, anyway? People live there, these people don't want to be part of Argentina, they want to be part of the UK (which they are). So what trumps their right to self-determination?

        The two usual things that people use to try and trump the Falklander's right to self-determination are either claiming that the land is Argentina's by right of geographical proximity, or that it was taken from Argentina unfairly. Neither stands up.

        To those who tout Argentinian ownership based on geographical proximity, I simply point out that the islands are about 300 miles away. You can't even see them from Argentina due to curvature of the Earth! If being in that range is sufficient to make some land yours, then I own France, Spain and Belgium. (Anyone want to buy 4,000,000 very rude waiters?).

        To those who tout Argentinian ownership based on precedent, I ask people when Argentinians ever settled there? I think there was briefly an Argentinian base there, which post-dates British settlement and that's about it. The people who settled the Falkland islands turned up on an empty, uninhabited island which Argentina had never occupied. There was a very ancient canoe found there by archaeologists, iirc. A canoe which predates the formation of Argentina and probably was some unfortunate souls who drifted out too far into the ocean and starved to death.

        The ONLY legal basis for Argentina to own the Falkland islands is that King Philip of Spain once drew a line on a map and said they could have that area. A person whose opinion and legal weight has about as much worth as my own. Less, imho, given that I base my opinion on what the people who actually live there want.

        1. TheVogon Silver badge

          Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

          "they want to be part of the UK (which they are)."

          No, the Falklands is NOT part of the UK. Just like Jersey, etc are also not part of the UK.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

          "Anyone want to buy 4,000,000 very rude waiters?" Classic. :))

      2. Jagged

        Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

        "It is politically impossible for any British government to give away that territory now that British blood has soaked its sands"

        - No its not. I am old enough to have heard the same thing said about Northern Ireland. The British government WILL give up its claims to the Falklands the moment the Falkland Islanders vote to go somewhere else. If the Argentinian government had any sense whatsoever they would go on the charm offensive to the Falkland Islanders, that's their only hope of getting their hands on the territory.

        1. SkippyBing Silver badge

          Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

          - No its not. I am old enough to have heard the same thing said about Northern Ireland.

          That's the Northern Ireland that's still part of the UK right?

          1. Ken Hagan Gold badge

            Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

            "That's the Northern Ireland that's still part of the UK right?"

            That's the one, and it precisely proves the point. In the 1990s, the UK government made a public declaration that the UK had no territorial interest on the island of Ireland. Northern Ireland remains part of the UK only because the local people want it to.

            (It's a slightly different case because of the size of the population, of course. There were rumours in the 90s that the UK had offered to hand over the territory in line with historic claims by Eire over the entire island, and been politely refused on the grounds that they didn't want the loyalist groups to become their problem.)

          2. Alan Brown Silver badge

            Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

            "That's the Northern Ireland that's still part of the UK right?"

            That's the Northern Ireland which was handed over to the Free Irish State along with the rest of the island and which immediately opted out and back into british hands. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_Northern_Ireland

            The UK government doesn't _want_ Northern Ireland, but they're stuck with it until the population vote differently.

            1. organiser

              Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

              If it is so that any country or region that wants to become part of the UK (or an overseas territory) can become so, then Argentina could get one step closer to the Falklands by becoming a part of the UK.

        2. streaky Silver badge

          Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

          I am old enough to have heard the same thing said about Northern Ireland

          Oh sorry is NI part of the Republic now? Must have missed that one.

          The British government WILL give up its claims to the Falklands the moment the Falkland Islanders vote to go somewhere else

          Which will happen roughly when hell freezes over, even if they vote by referenda to be an independent state they'll still be a protectorate of the UK and everything that follows. It's not going to happen regardless, but that's what would happen.

          Falklands is strategically useful to the UK because of it's proximity to Antarctica, regardless of the views of the Islanders it's going to keep its legal status for centuries.

          There's no non-military solution to the debate that favours Argentina in this, and obviously the military option just doesn't work either, the UK being much more capable militarily than it was last time they had a shot.

          1. Alan Brown Silver badge

            Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

            The thing which made the difference the last time round and would make the difference this time round is submarines.

            As soon as the UK had _one_ in the area, the argentine navy ran and hid. So did all civilian shipping.

            As for "more capable militarily", I'd say the current lack of fixed wing aircraft capable of being used on ships would argue otherwise. As is the inability to bomb the runway at Port Stanley from a fixed base.

            As most people have pointed out, this is all just a dog-and-bone show anyway, to try and distract form the internal problems and most argentinians see it that way too (there are always a few who will be happy to make a fuss about whatever the government wants them to make a fuss about. but they're a vocal minority who expect to get handsomely paid.)

            1. streaky Silver badge

              Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

              As for "more capable militarily", I'd say the current lack of fixed wing aircraft capable of being used on ships would argue otherwise. As is the inability to bomb the runway at Port Stanley from a fixed base.

              Things we have now we didn't then:

              Trident.

              Cruise missiles by the metric fk ton.

              SAMPSON

              Drones

              Way more capable defensive and offensive missile systems

              A military that's had some practice

              The list continues but I'm bored, carriers are for halfwits.

              Come to think of it when we've used all that kit and the yanks get bored of selling us tomahawks at roughly the end of time we can just start doing aa refuelling runs over the atlantic for months on end. That said there'd be nothing left of Argentina after day two but still..

          2. Jagged

            Re: Argies are too late @Flocke Kroes

            You missed the fact that the people of NI have the power to decide their own fate and the minute the Catholics outnumber the Protestants, things will change.

    2. MyffyW Silver badge
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Argies are too late

      My online commentard-ego would like to lay claim to .mf based on a jurisdiction going back to my first post a whole 2 years ago.

      1. Swarthy Silver badge

        Re: Argies are too late

        If you do get .mf, could I purchase bad.mf from you, or would Samuel L. Jackson have first dibs on that one?

        1. MyffyW Silver badge

          Re: Argies are too late

          It's yours for free @Swarthy if you'll sing "Nimrod's Son" by the Pixies whilst I do a Kim Deal impression on the bass guitar.

          1. Swarthy Silver badge

            Re: Argies are too late

            Agreed! I'll even have the video (click-to-play, none of that auto-start crap) on the front page of the domain.

          2. Mark 85 Silver badge

            Re: Argies are too late

            It's yours for free @Swarthy if you'll sing "Nimrod's Son" by the Pixies whilst I do a Kim Deal impression on the bass guitar.

            And thus a startup is born.. and we are witness to it. I'm in awe of the power of the comments section.

        2. Peter Simpson 1
          Joke

          Re: Argies are too late

          Perhaps the Falklands domain could be changed from .fk to .fku?

          To emphasise to the Argentinians the fact that they're part of the UK, of course...

          1. ian 22

            Re: Argies are too late

            Perhaps the Argies would accept .fkall. Or even .fkarg!

  3. tfewster Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    .fk, .mi or .disputed ?

    Is the argument over whether the Islands should have their own ccTLD or the actual code assigned?

    If they're big enough for a ccTLD, they should be able to choose their own. No government meddling with t'interwebs, please!

    1. Alan Brown Silver badge

      Re: .fk, .mi or .disputed ?

      Pitcairn Island has its own domain (population less than 100), as does Christmas Island (An australian military base with _no_ local resident population)

      On that basis, I think if the Falklands want one they're entitled to it.

      1. Jay Daley

        Re: .fk, .mi or .disputed ?

        Christmas Island (.cx) has a population of 2700 or so having been settled in the 1890s. There is no military base there. As we're talking IANA - the software originally written for the .cx registry is now one of the most widely used registry systems.

  4. bazza Silver badge

    "What the hell happens when there isn't the backstop of the US government and global political disputes are left in the hands of 20 nerds lined up in a long crescent?"

    That's easy. They'll make a mess of it.

    If control of domains starts being influenced by whatever is politically trendy at any given point in time then the whole organisation will be brought into disrepute.

    1. nematoad Silver badge

      "If control of domains starts being influenced by whatever is politically trendy at any given point in time then the whole organisation will be brought into disrepute."

      I really think that ICANN have already brought themselves into disrepute with all the shenanigans that have happened lately.

      See Netmundial as a text-book example.

    2. Alan Brown Silver badge

      "If control of domains starts being influenced by whatever is politically trendy at any given point in time then the whole organisation will be brought into disrepute."

      Let's not forget one very important thing about the Internet:

      ICANN have precisely as much power as the users of the Internet choose to give them. If they step too far out of line, then there are a bunch of alternative registries and not even the UN can mandate that everyone use ICANN if they don't want to.

  5. This post has been deleted by a moderator

    1. Charlie Clark Silver badge
      FAIL

      There are loads of overseas territories with TLDs.

      1. Gannon (J.) Dick

        True enough, @Charlie Clark

        "There are loads of overseas territories with TLDs."

        But only about 14 extra if you believe FIFA, or 20 if you believe the World Bank. And therein lies the problem:

        1) FIFA includes separate clubs in England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland - which "we" don't want to talk about off the field.

        2) The World Bank includes Tax Havens which names "we" should never speak out loud.

        The Falklands plays neither unmentionable sport ... they must be given the gift of Civilization, drunk fans, dodgy Bankers, maybe even State Visit from a Silicon Valley Executive Assistant.

    2. BinkyTheMagicPaperclip Silver badge

      I think you misunderstand just how British the culture of Falklanders is - it's frequently held up as an example of being more British than Britain. It's a small island with a very strong identity, that benefits from its association with the UK. No surprise the inhabitants voted in favour of remaining British.

    3. Captain Scarlet Silver badge
      Facepalm

      British Overseas Territory not UK Overseas Territory

  6. John Hawkins
    Trollface

    Outer Manchuria before the Falklands

    I reckon someone with too much time on their hands should start up a campaign to have Outer Manchuria returned to China. After all, the Chinese have more rights to Outer Manchuria than the Argies have to the Falklands.

    Would wind up both the Argies and the Ruskies. Maybe the Ruskies wouldn't be so keen on supporting the Argies in the future either.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Outer Manchuria before the Falklands

      What about Ceuta? Spain fusses about Gibraltar, while having its own rock on the other side of the Straits.

      If all the disputed territories were to be straightened out based on geography, the Falklands would come a long way down ICANN's list. But long before they had sorted out the South China Sea, being an ICANN member might have become too dangerous for most people's tastes.

    2. Charlie Clark Silver badge

      Re: Outer Manchuria before the Falklands

      Although it's hard to imagine countries actually going to war over TLDs, stranger things have happened.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Outer Manchuria before the Falklands

        "Although it's hard to imagine countries actually going to war over TLDs, stranger things have happened."

        I wasn't suggesting that, just that I wouldn't want to be an ICANN member who found himself having to vote on a decision that the Chinese government didn't like. The only issue might be where they would send the bill for the bullet.

      2. Trigonoceps occipitalis

        Re: Outer Manchuria before the Falklands

        Perhaps Mr Jenkins had a particularly fine ear.

    3. J.G.Harston Silver badge

      Re: Outer Manchuria before the Falklands

      Maybe a campaign for Texas to be returned to Mexico. I mean, you can't just go and settle in some foreign province and then demand that that province be annexed to the mother country, do svedanya?

      1. BongoJoe

        Re: Outer Manchuria before the Falklands

        My favourite example of this was when Peter The Great had the audacity to built his capital city on foreign soil...

        1. Ken Hagan Gold badge

          Re: Outer Manchuria before the Falklands

          Yeah, that's a *proper* Russian strongman. The present lot are just limp in comparison.

          1. BongoJoe

            Re: Outer Manchuria before the Falklands

            Spoken like a man who likes polonium in his tea.

  7. A Non e-mouse Silver badge

    Local control

    The .fk domain for the islands has been issued to the islanders to manage/control. It has not been issued to the British (or the Argentinians)

    So what's the problem? If the UK had said their domain must be fk.uk, then I could see some argument for being upset.

    1. Ben Tasker Silver badge

      Re: Local control

      Presumably, if .fk were to be taken away (not that I think it would), the fallback would be precisely that...

    2. Bluenose

      Re: Local control

      I think the problem is that the Argentinian govt would prefer it if the islands where given a AR country code or that the code was fk.ar. The fact that the islanders have been given a code without the permission of Argentina undermines the Argentinian legal claims as it shows the the islands are not subject to the control of Buenos Aires but are allowed by Britain to exercise their own political and economic will without interference.

  8. zaax

    In doing this Argentina have recognised that the Falkland’s islanders belong to the Falkland islanders otherwise they would not have recognised the .fk as the code for the Falklands as they call it the Malvinas to which it code is MV

  9. The JP

    Did Mr Carvell...

    ...just tell them to get .fk 'ed?

    1. Triggerfish

      Re: Did Mr Carvell...

      Sounds like he did the verbal equivalent of Operation Black Buck.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The only indigenous people in the Falklands are penguins, the Argies should take a close look at themselves and whose land they stole and what they do to the original owners:

    https://www.amnesty.org/en/latest/news/2013/08/indigenous-peoples-argentina-we-are-strangers-our-own-country/

  11. Big_Boomer

    Simples

    Give the .FK to the Argentinians and move all the hosted domains to .fk.uk as suggested above. Who cares what domain name is used? As for the nationality of the islands, that was decided in 2013.

  12. Omgwtfbbqtime Silver badge

    The people living on the Falklands are called "Stills"

    as in They're Still fucking Bennies.

    or if you prefer :

    They're still the fucking Falkland Islands you Argie twat.

    Hmm I need coffee.

  13. This post has been deleted by its author

  14. TeeCee Gold badge
    Coat

    Get yer skates on Argentina!

    We're building some new aircraft carriers you know.

    When those are finished you'll be properly .fk'd for nicking any islands you fancy the look of.

    1. joeldillon

      Re: Get yer skates on Argentina!

      Not til we have some planes to go on them...

      1. Van

        Re: Get yer skates on Argentina!

        I read that three Eurofighter Typhoons are enough to take out the whole Argentine air force if it was thrown at them. A 4th Typhoon is stationed on the islands to cover for refueling.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Get yer skates on Argentina!

          three Eurofighter Typhoons

          That cost more than Argentina's GDP to build as well

          1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

            Re: Get yer skates on Argentina!

            Argentina don't seem to have spent much money on their navy or airforce since the war. Certainly not in recent years. I had a look online a while ago, and they still seemed to have the same Daggers and Skyhawks as before, only now they're 50 years old, instead of 20. So I'd imagine they wouldn't be able to put up more than a few of them at a time.

            There was a story going round a month or so ago that Argentina were looking to lease some attack planes off the Russians. Although only SU24s iirc, so nothing all that modern. It also seems a little hard on the pilots to hire a bunch of bombers, and no fighters to protect them. The MOD responded by promising to update the Falklands missile batteries in the next few years, and I guess they can always sling some more Typhoons down there, to augment the 4 they've got.

            The navy seems to have even less of the old stuff left working - and also not much new.

            In 1982 we had 80-odd marines and one old ice patrol ship. The garrison is now a battalion of troops, 4 modern fighters with airbase to fly in more, a modern air defence destroyer, SAMs an ice patrol ship and (I seem to remember) an armed fisheries protection ship, plus maybe a submarine.

            It would taken a serious effort to amphibiously invade close to Port Stanley against a whole battalion of troops, let alone all the other stuff. Argentina could have done that in 1982 (with some losses), They'd seriously struggle now. Otherwise you've got to invade somewhere like Teal Inlet, San Carlos (where we did) or Bluff Cove and walk. Which takes a while, and allows for re-inforcements. Our strategy seems designed to make a surprise attack very unlikely, and then fly down reinforcements in case of a scary looking build up.

            1. This post has been deleted by its author

            2. Bluenose

              Re: Get yer skates on Argentina!

              I believe that the Chinese are supposed to be obtaining a number of Chinese FC-1/JF-17 "Thunder" fighters (according to the Express back in February). According to the same source they are allegedly amongst the "most advanced fighter jets in the world" although having read some background on them I think the answer is that they are small medium priced car (with Argentinian number plates) which a few extra Typhoons and improved long range ground based radar would probably find relatively simple to manage.

            3. Alan Brown Silver badge

              Re: Get yer skates on Argentina!

              "I had a look online a while ago, and they still seemed to have the same Daggers and Skyhawks as before, only now they're 50 years old, instead of 20."

              Bearing in mind that New Zealand grounded all its A4s after a very expensive refitting exercise (project Kahu) because of wing spar cracking (it would have been cheaper to buy F15s than to fix the A4s), you're probably right - It's quite likely that anything they sent out would either fall out of the sky before it got that far or do so as soon as it had to execute a high-G turn.

              This is all about the argentine economy being so far down the shitter it's almost made it through to the oxidation pond, not about actual sovereignty.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: "Not til we have some planes to go on them..."

        The whole F35 project is a mess, we need combat drones like Taranis, who's successor should hopefully be in service about the time our air craft carriers are ready for service....

        Cheaper, Safer and more expendable than piloted planes.

        With a plane, you loose the plane you loose all the experience of the pilot.. with drones, you just loose the drone, the pilot learns from his mistake...

        But then again, who needs planes, in theory a single type 45 could defend the Falklands against the entire South American air-force.

        1. This post has been deleted by its author

          1. TheVogon Silver badge

            Re: "Not til we have some planes to go on them..."

            "A single type 45 destroyer such as HMS Dauntless could shoot down the whole Argentine air force in under a day."

            How do they defend against Exocets, etc. these days?

            1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

              Re: "Not til we have some planes to go on them..."

              How do they defend against Exocets, etc. these days?

              Faster missiles with longer ranges and better radars. Particularly with computers better able to pick up sea skimmers from the surface clutter. And radar controlled gattling guns for last-ditch defence too nowadays.

              Oh and also supposedly computers that can handle multiple targets, with multiple launchers to attack them with. One of the problems in the Falklands was with the computers getting confused, unable to prioritise which of two equally dangerous targets to engage - and going into reset mode and ignoring both. They were engaging at such close range that there wasn't time for the operators to override. I think it was at least Coventry that got it that way?

        2. Cardinal

          Re: "Not til we have some planes to go on them..."

          "With a plane, you loose the plane you loose all the experience of the pilot.. with drones, you just loose the drone, the pilot learns from his mistake"

          L - O - S - E

        3. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

          Re: "Not til we have some planes to go on them..."

          "With a plane, you loose the plane you loose all the experience of the pilot.. with drones, you just loose the drone, the pilot learns from his mistake..."

          Is there any evidence of drone v pilot combat results? So far as I'm aware drones are currently only used for surveillance or as missile strike platforms. I don't recall ever hearing of drones being deployed where they might be targeted by live pilot fighters. What's the C&C lag time like? I suspect the Yanks might have at least tried this out in training but if so, are those drones just sitting ducks for a decent pilot?

          1. Ken Hagan Gold badge

            Re: "Not til we have some planes to go on them..."

            I don't think C&C time lag is necessarily the point. In principle, you could have a button that puts the drone into autonomous combat mode, whereupon it does whatever it takes (pulling rather more g-s than a pilot could, if necessary) to remove the target you've identified. In practice, I'm sure the extra sensory and processing hardware required is not yet standard issue on existing drones. However, I'm sure DARPA are working on it.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: "Not til we have some planes to go on them..."

              BUY RUSSIAN!

              Say NO to tacticooled overly expensive amerishit that is always in development and NO to committee-designed Euroland can-do-all-missions-as-long-as-Finmeccanica-gets-a-slice barfulations.

              BUY RUSSIAN!!!

            2. Alan Brown Silver badge

              Re: "Not til we have some planes to go on them..."

              It's always surprised me that rear-firing cannon or missiles aren't standard equipment on anything intended to go into a dogfight.

        4. Alan Brown Silver badge

          Re: "Not til we have some planes to go on them..."

          "in theory a single type 45 could defend the Falklands against the entire South American air-force."

          In theory. In practice something would get past its defences. Which is why you'd need two of them.

    2. This post has been deleted by its author

  15. Jim Lewis

    Would the issue be better handled if it wasn't in the hands of a 'Manel'?

    http://allmalepanels.tumblr.com/

    1. DavCrav Silver badge

      "Would the issue be better handled if it wasn't in the hands of a 'Manel'?"

      I don't see why. There was definitely a woman on the panel when the Falklands were invaded, and there's a woman in charge of Argentina who is currently rattling the kitchen knife (they can't afford sabres), so why do you think anything would be better involving women?

  16. ScottAS2
    Facepalm

    By Jingo!

    (Sarcasm icon needed)

    1. Grinning Bandicoot

      Re: By Jingo!

      Also one for cynics

  17. lglethal Silver badge
    WTF?

    I'm actually curious

    if there are any argentinians here what they think of the whole Falklands debate?

    Considering that the claim is based entirely upon the claim of the nation of River Plate's soverignty of the islands which lasted from 1826-1832 (and was not the first claims to the islands that being from the British and Spanish in the 1770's). It seems strange that the Argentinians are not also claiming the lands of Paraguay and Uruguay which were also part of the River Plate nation. The claim is also made weaker by the fact that there has been a continual presence of the british on the island since 1840 (all these details from wikipedia).

    If 175 years of history isnt enough to claim to be one nation and not another, then I dont know what is....

    1. nematoad Silver badge
      Headmaster

      Re: I'm actually curious

      Argentinians

      British

      Falklanders

      Capitalise! They are Proper Nouns.

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

      2. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Vincent Ballard

      Re: I'm actually curious

      Spain hasn't given up claiming Gibraltar, even though it's now been British for about 100 years longer than it was Spanish. But at a grassroots level (as a resident of Spain), rather than complaints about non-fulfilment of the Treaty of Utrecht what I hear are complaints about cigarette smuggling.

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
        Facepalm

        Re: I'm actually curious

        "cigarette smuggling"

        Considering that the EU is supposed to be a free trade area, that does sound rather like an anachronism. Maybe it's time the EU "harmonised" tobacco, alcohol and fuel duties or at least decree that if duty is paid at the point of sale then you can take it anywhere in the EU that you choose.

        Based on previous "harmonisations" I suspect a lot of people in the EU would be extremely displeased at a massive hike in prices :-)

        1. TheVogon Silver badge

          Re: I'm actually curious

          "Considering that the EU is supposed to be a free trade area"

          Gibraltar isn't part of the EU customs union. Just like the Spanish equivalents - the Balearics...

  18. 2Fat2Bald

    IF I understand Argentina's argument....

    "We should have control over that FLK space, because nearly 200 years ago some of our people landed on the uninhabited island.... And promptly left when they realise it wasn't of much use to anyone (back then)."

    The counter argument is.....

    "We're the falklanders who've lived here for nearly 200 years, this is our home, and we'd like to control the namespace related to it..."

    They're not even giving it to the Brits, as such, it's the Falklanders who have it.

    1. h4rm0ny

      Ah but the real Argentine argument is "a foreign company discovered oil reserves on the Eastern side of the islands and we want them."

      It's just phrased differently.

      1. Sgt_Oddball Silver badge

        Stop me if you've heard this one before.

        That sounds oddly familiar. I feel like I've heard that one before. Something about the Americas as a whole and a desire to fight where there's oil.

      2. Trigonoceps occipitalis

        Oh, its bigger than that. The claim to the British Antarctic Territories rely on the Falkland Island Dependencies. This claim is overlapped by those of Argentina and Chile. (Chile has gone as far as arranging births in within their claim so there are native Antarticians to throw into the bun fight.)

        Argentina has form for using international forums to advance their preposterous claim to the Falkland Islands. In 1990 the control for the FI Flight Reporting Region was unilaterally changes to Ushuaia at the behest of Buenos Aires. UK delegate asleep or something.

  19. Yugguy

    ALL TOGETHER NOW

    http://www.macclads.co.uk/hectic_house/lyrics/lyrics_alpha/buen.html

  20. dvv

    Damn… That Carvell fella sure sounded like a Russian talking about Crimea…

    1. Hollerith 1

      Win the war first

      Politics in our sorry world includes military successes and defeats. A military defeat is considered a conclusive political act, so that, for instance, Iraq was expected to stop troubling Kuwait after the First Gulf War. Whatever one thinks of might-makes-right, winning the ground through battle tends to let you keep the ground. The British won the ground in the Falklands. There is therefore no ongoing debate about who owns them.

      Since I don't personally like the appeal to arms to be the final appeal, because nasty, the argument now more securely rests on the voice of the Falkland Islanders themselves. And we know how they voted.

    2. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Damn… That Carvell fella sure sounded like a Russian talking about Crimea…

      Sir. I shall ask you to leave. You are upsetting the locals.

  21. shinanygnz
    Go

    Rolling back to 1830

    The gist of the Argentinian position appears to be that we return to the map of the world in 1830 so they get the Falklands, but by that argument we get India, Canada, Australia, large chunks of Africa, etc., etc. back. Sounds like a win for us, though the current inhabitants may or may not be too happy about that. As for the state of Europe, well, that'll be interesting with no Germany, the Prussians back, Italy breaking up, and so forth, and the Turks might like it too.

    1. Cardinal

      Re: Rolling back to 1830

      Hey, - it worked for the Israelis didn't it?

    2. J.G.Harston Silver badge

      Re: Rolling back to 1830

      If we roll back to 1830 then Wales gets Patagonia *and* the Falklands. Back then Argentina didn't extend any further south than the Salado River. Argentina didn't occupy any territory anywhere near the Falklands until the Conquest Of The Desert in the 1880s.

  22. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
    Linux

    How about a swap?

    We keep the Falklands, and Argentina can have Scotland instead. Everyone should be happy then. Argentina get somewhere British and windswept with oil, the Scots are rid of the English, and we can get some peace and quiet without being constantly told off by their government.

    I know Scotland doesn't have any penguins, but we could tell them that the pandas are giant ones. They'd never notice until it was too late...

    1. Peter Simpson 1
      Thumb Up

      Re: How about a swap?

      Let me know how it goes when the Scots are told that their new national language is Spanish.

      // I see blue bottoms...

      1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
        Happy

        Re: How about a swap?

        I can't work out who the down-voters are. Is it angry Scots who don't want to speak Spanish, angry Argentinians who really, really want their dose of penguins, or people with no sense of humour?

        A friend of mine's Dad is Glaswegian and his Mum is from Southern Spain. She learned english from him, so has a combined Spanish/Glaswegian accent that is just a little hard to understand.

        I've not heard his spanish, so don't know whether he speaks spanwegian or not.

        1. AbelSoul
          Trollface

          Re: don't know whether he speaks spanwegian

          Glaswanish?

        2. John H Woods Silver badge

          Re: How about a swap?

          "spanwegian" - love it; weirdest sound I ever heard was fluent Arabic with an unmistakable strong Scouse accent ...

          1. Triggerfish

            Re: How about a swap?

            I knew a Thai girl who had learn't English mainly from watching "Only fools and horses" DVDs, that was pretty odd.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: How about a swap?

              Let me know how it goes when the Scots are told that their new national language is Spanish.

              In the end, the Spanish Armada would actually have succeeded. At least partly.

              1. moiety

                Re: How about a swap?

                I knew some Germans who had learnt English by watching Monty Python. Excellent accents and the conversations were very silly; which was also excellent.

  23. Daz555

    "On Thursday, there was a meeting at the United Nations about the islands that resolved the UK and Argentina should get together and negotiate a solution to the ongoing sovereignty dispute."

    We did this already - in 1982.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      And again

      in 2013

      So by vote and by defence against an invading force, it's ours

      and has been before Argentina existed as a country.

      1. MrXavia

        Re: And again

        I like to think its the Falkland islanders land, they live there, its their choice to remain a British Overseas Territory, if they wanted to leave, we would not stop them, but while they are British, we should damned well defend them with all we have!

  24. Vinyl-Junkie
    Joke

    Who is the 0.2%?

    99.8% voted to remain British? Who's the b**tard who voted against?

    By the way Argentina, I believe the .fu domain is still available!

    1. Code Monkey
      Windows

      Re: Who is the 0.2%?

      Yeah. They can .fk off.

    2. nematoad Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: Who is the 0.2%?

      " 99.8% voted to remain British? Who's the b**tard who voted against?"

      AFAIK there were 3 votes against.

      No idea why they voted as they did but I bet they kept really quite about it!

      1. Vinyl-Junkie
        Coat

        Re: Who is the 0.2%?

        "No idea why they voted as they did but I bet they kept really quite about it!"

        Although judging by the down vote at least one of them reads these forums....

    3. organiser

      Re: Who is the 0.2%?

      There were actually six of them.

  25. James Cane

    Illogical

    Can't Argentina just apply for a second alternative TLD for the "Malvinas" and open it up to any business or individual who wants it?

    Or do they not understand how the internet works?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Illogical

      "Can't Argentina just apply for a second alternative TLD for the "Malvinas""

      On what basis? It might be *their* preferred term for the islands, but it still refers to the same islands, so surely it'd still belong to whoever had the currently-recognised legitimate claim on them.

      Those people could then use the ".malvinas" TLD however they wished- for example, they may wish to display a little image before redirecting to the ".fk" domain:-

      http://s10.postimg.org/u1qn7c9jd/31170532_513b9f224b_o2.jpg

      I'm sure the Argentines would enthusiastically support this.

  26. Zombieman
    Trollface

    Couple of interesting points...

    Most ccTLDs follow the ISO 3166 standard for 2 alphabetic character codes - there are exceptions, such as UK for example, assigned as an "exceptional reservation" within that ISO spec.

    FK was assigned in the 1974 edition of the ISO 3166 standard - ref https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ISO_3166-1_alpha-2

    Seems to me all ICANN did was follow the ISO spec.

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      I thought that was ICANN policy now. In order to avoid complicated and annoying bunfights, such as this one, they just followed the ISO list and let someone else sort it out.

      Although I suppose that doesn't help if people just waste all your time trying to get you to change that policy instead.

      It's not exactly an uncommon problem. For example the Palestinian Authority have now got FIFA menmbership, and what's one of their first actions? To try and get FIFA to ban a bunch of Israeli teams.

      Although at least they have a serious dispute with Israel. Greece has wasted years of everyone's time childishly pissing around because when Macedonia left Yugoslavia, Greece has a provice called Macedonia - and it would somehow hurt national pride to allow a country to use it. Or they're not the real Macedonians, they're just very not boys... Or somesuch bollocks.

      So we now have the ludicrous situation of a country called The Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia, in order to satisfy a bunch of Greek policiticans who would have better spent their time not running their country's economy off a cliff. Although to be fair, they only crashed it into a tree, it was the IMF, EU and Germany who actually pushed the wreck over the edge of the cliff.

  27. elawyn

    Should start calling it the Falklands Island Union (hey, 'Islands' is a plural'!)

    Then it could be .fku

    1. Vinyl-Junkie
      Headmaster

      Islands is a plural...

      Yes; East Falkland, West Falkland and approximately 800 smaller islands. So Falkland Islands is correct....

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    .gotcha

    Too soon?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: .gotcha

      No, but I don't see why El Reg insists on displaying the Union Jack, a Symbol of Hate and Oppression, on the front page, not only once, but twice!

      TAKE IT DOWN, I SAY!

  29. Carl W
    Thumb Up

    Upstanding chap

    Seems he is a fellow gold MacBook owner.

  30. Brian Allan 1

    Useless "long crescent"

    "the hands of 20 nerds lined up in a long crescent" I think anyone in business realizes ABSOLUTELY nothing gets done by committee and certainly not by 20 nerds!

  31. Chris G Silver badge

    Called their bluff

    Some years ago I got a contract to work for a start up building a 40ft yacht based on a successfully competing hull. The two partners were Argentinian, the Company Secretary was Argentinian as were the four other workers; one lunch time they pointed out to me I was the only brit amongst seven Argentinians and that they wanted the Malvinas back.

    I pointed out that if the had won the FALKLANDS war they could call them the Malvinas but since they lost the name should remain as the Falklands at minimum because that's what the people who actually lived there would like.

    They began to argue their case so I just said 'Tell you what, lets fight for 'em now'. They shut up!

    To be fair to Argentinians , I work with an Argentinian Yacht Skipper, he is well educated, a decent bloke and more than a little embarrassed at any mention of new claims to the Falklands.

  32. Stevie Silver badge

    Bah!

    a) No dispute. Galtieri lost, same as Lee did. Get over it.

    2) There is no such place as "the British Malvinas"

    $) Official apology for the disgraceful treatment of the Top Gear crew required soonest.

  33. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Where's

    Clarkson when you need him!!!!

  34. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Just send one of the Trident submarines of their coast as a warning, only real weapon we have left.

  35. Rol Silver badge

    The worst offender in all of this...

    Is the UN. It was in their power to end this dispute once and for all, but chose to do its usual and run away from all obligation to make this world a more peaceful and harmonious place, by facing up to bullies and gangsters.

    Please Mr United Nations could you explain what part of the Argentinian argument actual has merit?

    I propose the domain .un can be hosted on the moon along with all the futile pointless meetings that have yet to orchestrate anything tangibly useful for this planet.

  36. Grinning Bandicoot

    A proposal

    Revanchism as a practice is one that one that one who thinks before the leap (obviously not the Argentine delegation) should consider because the ship has already sailed. The country code for amateur radio has been established for nearly 100 years and never been challenged.

    If any other pseudo-nationalist thinks that revanchism is the ticket, they are looking for a wild west shoot out in a dark, foggy night. Let's try this one on for size: Argentina was part of Spain so assign them the Spanish coding (es). Oh wait! Spain was part of a Moorish empire and before that part of the Roman Empire but was settled by Pheonician who displaced Celts, Basques, and Iberians. All of which replaced Neanderthals so the code for Argentina (ar)should be changed to one supporting the rights of the poor down trodden Neanderthal. Let us all petition the United Nations in the name of the Argentinians to restore the ancient homelands of the Neanderthals or at least those not in Argentina

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: A proposal

      I think ISIS is hot for this. Watch out Spain!

  37. adam payne Silver badge

    The people of the Falkland Islands voted to remain an overseas territory of the UK and that's good enough for me. As long as they remain a overseas territory we should protect them with everything we have.

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