back to article Who thinks Microsoft Edge sucks? Erm, Microsoft

Microsoft relaunched Internet Explorer this week as "Edge" – and the software behemoth appears already prepared to accept that its super new browser may absolutely suck. At the same time as the new name was announced at its Build conference in San Francisco, the Redmond biz instructed brand protection company MarkMonitor to …

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  1. Howard Hanek Bronze badge

    Another New 'Feature'

    I anticipate that the Edge 'Sharpener' will be available only in the premium versions.........

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Another New 'Feature'

      That is a very sharp statement from someone who is supposed to be dull and in need of a "Sharpener". DAMN SHEEP!!

    2. TheVogon Silver badge

      Re: Another New 'Feature'

      Just seen the benchmarks. Edge is faster than any other browser and it isn't even out of beta yet!

      1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

        Re: Another New 'Feature'

        Just seen the benchmarks.

        And now we know what sort of person pays attention to browser benchmarks.

        Edge is faster than any other browser and it isn't even out of beta yet!

        I suspect the amount of time saved over an entire lifetime by always using the fastest browser, over one of its slower competitors, is less than the time taken to download and install said browsers. And much less than the time taken to become accustomed to the new browser's UI and quirks.

        Opportunity costs and cognitive load trump negligible processing-performance advantages.

        1. TheVogon Silver badge

          Re: Another New 'Feature'

          "And now we know what sort of person pays attention to browser benchmarks."

          The sort of person that makes the decision what someone like you gets on their corporate desktop...

          1. Hans 1 Silver badge
            Windows

            Re: Another New 'Feature'

            >The sort of person that makes the decision what someone like you gets on their corporate desktop...

            The Microsoft Certified Surface Expert, aka "Windows cleaner", makes no decisions ... those are made by Redmond on your behalf, so Microsoft Edge it will be.

            Seriously, I don't trust those browser benchmarks, besides, depending on which benchmark, Chrome, Firefox, & Opera are faster ... cannot find the link, but it is on here somewhere.

            Next we'll hear Windows is executing browser code in kernel land, to boost performance.

            BTW, does Microsoft Edge come with IESHIMS.DLL ? There is completely unrelated software that depends on that DLL, most notably SAP JCo... not sure why ...

            1. somethingbrite

              Re: Another New 'Feature'

              Why am I responding to a post that is already more than a year old?

              Simple. - because I am using both Edge AND Bing (because I foolishly bought into the Lumia 950 thinking Microsoft had finally got its act together.)

              Edge and Bing are both really THAT shit.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    too much to buy

    EdgeReallySucks.com

    Edge.really.sucks

    CutYourselfOnMicrosoftEdge.com

    MSEdgeIs.pants

    1. hplasm Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: too much to buy

      What of the TXT generation?

      MSEDJSUX.com

    2. Ken Hagan Gold badge

      Re: too much to buy

      or even edge-sucks.com, which has the additional advantage that it doesn't need to be capitalised in a particular way to be easily readable.

  3. Jamie Jones Silver badge

    it just highlights the TLD bollocks that has been unleashed

    (Title)

    1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

      Re: it just highlights the TLD bollocks that has been unleashed

      Yes. Better, I'd think, for large companies to take the high ground and refuse to play. The Streisand effect of throwing money at a zero-added-value partner like MarkMonitor to play whack-a-mole with domain names, and consequent mockery in the tech press, probably outweighs any PR benefit of blocking those domains in the first place.

      The trolls and complainers will troll and complain.1 Stepping on a few weeds will not eradicate them from the garden.

      1I have no interest in Microsoft Edge myself. I'll switch browsers when I absolutely have to, because there's very little advantage to doing so, and non-negligible opportunity cost. But by the same token I'm not going to waste time trying it just so I can complain about it.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Mushroom

    "Microsoft relaunched Internet Explorer this week..."

    Sorry, I can't be seen anywhere in orbit of such a fireball opener.

    Pic of the "relaunch" ----10--9--8--7--6--5--4--3--2--1--0------->

    "Sell crazy somewhere else, we're all stocked up here."

  5. Ole Juul Silver badge

    Big company

    Little confidence.

    1. MrDamage

      Re: Big company

      Little confidence, or finally admitting the truth?

  6. PoliTecs

    Hatters Will Hate!

    WTF do any of you know about it, have you even tried it, and GET A F***ING LIFE!

    Not a single person here has identified what exactly sucks about it which makes this story and you sorry asses the real SUCK story behind the ignorant HATE for AMS (anything Microsoft).

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      you must be new here.

      Even posts that are 100% true in what they say get downvoted.

      This does make you wonder if some readers just downvote 'because they can'.

      1. Grikath Silver badge

        downvotes.

        There's several types of downvoters here, including the guerilla "downvote because I can" types.

        As far as MS hate is concerned nothing or no-one can beat Eadon of the past though. All other comments/flames/manifestos against MS are but sputtering wind-blown candleflames against his thermic lance of hatred and despise. Boy.... that guy could rant.

        Whether he was a deliberate troll or someone clearly off his meds, his posts did contain about all the anti-MS bias ever invented, and some original gripes to boot. Sometimes I think it's a shame Vulture Central had to muzzle him, because he was on occasion quite amusing, and could liven up an otherwise ...boring.. comment thread to no end.

        1. king of foo

          Re: downvotes.

          ...my down vote above was meant to be funny...

          Usually I reserve them for trolls or stooges making false commentary, however I seem to get a lot from people disagreeing with what I have to say, which is fine. Free speech etc.

        2. RyokuMas Silver badge
          Trollface

          Re: downvotes.

          nothing or no-one can beat Eadon of the past though.

          I can think of a contender for that particular crown... except their bile is more for "anything non-google" rather than "anything Microsoft"...

        3. Solmyr ibn Wali Barad

          Re: downvotes.

          First rule of downvotes - we don't talk about downvotes.

          And this seems to be the only rule that holds water. All other theories are just delusions.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      So much has sucked from Microsoft since Windows 8 that inevitably the reporting and commentary will start from a baseline of "prove it doesn't suck".

      To answer your complaint, I have been trying Spartan (it's still called that in the latest build) out and in my opinion it does suck. I find my previous comments on the preview apps to be still valid with respect to Spartan : it is flakey, sluggish to start and feature-deficient. I see no reason yet to even consider using it as an alternative to Firefox or even Internet Explorer.

      One exception : the Reading view is pretty good and they seem to have worked out how to make it smoothly show multi-page articles as one.

      So, slightly less suckage than last time, but there is still along way to go.

      1. andy gibson

        Re: Reading View

        Is that this:

        http://carocat.tumblr.com/post/661477553/reading-skyline-taken-from-the-top-floor-of-the

    3. Richard Plinston Silver badge

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      > Not a single person here has identified what exactly sucks about it which makes this story and you sorry asses the real SUCK story behind the ignorant HATE for AMS (anything Microsoft).

      You really are clueless.- the article has nothing to do with whether Edge sucks. It is entirely about who has bought some domain names. Microsoft has, to prevent them being used by commentators - an attempt at limiting free speech perhaps.

    4. Mark 85 Silver badge
      Devil

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      and you sorry asses the real SUCK story behind the ignorant HATE for AMS (anything Microsoft).

      Nah.. we're equal-opportunity haters. We hate Apple, Google, M$, Facebook, Twitter, ad nauseam ad infinitum ... and just about everything else. We're commentards and wear our tardness proudly.

    5. Voland's right hand Silver badge

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      Bursar, did you take too many Dried Frog Pills...

    6. Lamont Cranston

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      What's Luton Town Football Club got to do with this?

    7. hplasm Silver badge
      Holmes

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      And so we see the wisdom of Men Without Hats - Safety Dance.

      It means to be safe, don't use edgy products from MS.

    8. Alister Silver badge

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      @PoliTecs

      You're a mad hatter you are...

      1. frank ly Silver badge
        Thumb Up

        Re: Hatters Will Hate!

        @Alister

        I was waiting for someone to notice and say it.

      2. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

        Re: Hatters Will Hate!

        You're a mad hatter you are...

        Hatter? He's the hattest we've seen in a while.

    9. mir

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      Shurley "haters will hate"? hatters tend to hat.

      1. King Jack
        Joke

        Re: Hatters Will Hate!

        'Brown' Hatters do something entirely different.

    10. Dan Wilkie

      WHAT DID YOU FUCKING SAY TO ME???

      What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

      1. gazthejourno (Written by Reg staff)

        Re: WHAT DID YOU FUCKING SAY TO ME???

        Someone just reported this comment. I lol'd.

        1. Oninoshiko

          Re: Gazthejourno

          I hope you're going to leave it up. I have no idea who he's responding to, but that's hilarious.

      2. Major N
        Coffee/keyboard

        Re: WHAT DID YOU FUCKING SAY TO ME???

        " I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it"

        You owe me a new KB

      3. Solmyr ibn Wali Barad
        Coffee/keyboard

        Re: WHAT DID YOU FUCKING SAY TO ME???

        Seal who is trained in gorilla warfare?

        Now that's a really scary beast.

      4. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: WHAT DID YOU FUCKING SAY TO ME???

        Ok

      5. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: WHAT DID YOU FUCKING SAY TO ME???

        "What the ...."

        Typical American.

        "and I have over 300 confirmed kills"

        But how many of those were not friendly forces?

      6. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: WHAT DID YOU FUCKING SAY TO ME???

        What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you … blah blah blah, WMDs blah blah blah … drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

        Ouch, someone hit a nerve… geez Dan, is your tin helmet on too tight?

      7. Nanki Poo

        Re: WHAT DID YOU FUCKING SAY TO ME???

        Eadon . . . is that you . . . ?

        nK

      8. Upinsmoke

        Re: WHAT DID YOU FUCKING SAY TO ME???

        Obviously some juvenile delinquent trying to act tough. Mommy should send him to bed without dinner. And watch your language junior or you'll get your mouth washed out with soap!

    11. Anonymous Blowhard

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      Wouldn't "Hatters" just "Hat"?

    12. John H Woods Silver badge

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      Who cares what hatters think? They're all mad ... I'm told it's the mercury ...

    13. Oninoshiko
      Facepalm

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      Pretty sure the part that sucks is them buying a bunch of "edgesucks.com" type domains (considering that's what the story was talking about). elReg doesn't just report on MS doing that, there have been numerous articles in the past about companies doing that.

      But you want someone to identify something that sucks about it, fine: when you go to type in the address bar, you can't tell how it's going to respond. You can single, double, or triple click it never highlights. Sometimes backspace deletes the entire text, sometimes it it backspaces a single character, and it never gives any indicator as to what it's going to do.

      Feel better?

    14. bigtimehustler

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      I am just confused as to why Hatters will be hating? Is Microsoft moving into the head wear business?

    15. Jamie Jones Silver badge
      Headmaster

      Re: Hatters Will Hate!

      "AMS (anything Microsoft)."

      "Microsoft" is one word, so that would be "AM", unless you were really telling us the acronym for "Anything Microsoft Sucks"!

      HAVE A NICE DAY!

  7. king of foo

    el reg still using cutting edge tech...

    Oy! Sort it out! The next time I see a blinking flash video in an El reg article I'm going to scream.

    1. king of foo

      Re: el reg still using cutting edge tech...

      My mistake... it might have been an ad...

      But my point stands. I've been seeing a lot of flash content lately...

    2. Jamie Jones Silver badge

      Re: el reg still using cutting edge tech...

      There is an El Reg animated gif that rears its ugly head sometimes (people looking back and fore at a tennis match)

  8. Xpositor

    Edge Logo

    Does anyone have an idea why the new logo for Edge is a shower head over a wash basin? For reference: http://logos.wikia.com/wiki/Microsoft_Edge

    1. Lamont Cranston
      Thumb Up

      Re: Edge Logo

      Ha! I had to squint to get that to appear - otherwise it just looks like the old IE "e" with a Flock of Seagulls haircut.

      1. Keef

        Re: Edge Logo

        I don't remember askin' you a Goddamn thing!

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Edge Logo

        "the old IE "e" with a Flock of Seagulls haircut."

        That'll hit the target audience, that's for sure.

      3. Pookietoo

        Re: Edge Logo

        Yay, A Flock of Seagulls. They're still going, but have very little hair left.

    2. Toltec

      Re: Edge Logo

      Try viewing it in a 2012 logo way.

    3. Fatman Silver badge

      Re: Edge Logo

      SHIT!!!!

      Here I thought that Microsoft would use something more descriptive of the informal name many have given to IE - Internet ExploDer.

      How's this for an icon:

      http://fc07.deviantart.net/fs50/i/2009/336/5/2/Mushroom_Cloud_by_Wittman80.jpg

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Mad Hatters and haters.

    Don't diss my security blanket !

  10. Adam Jarvis

    If it does suck, it can't do much harm

    If it does suck, it can hardly do any harm it only runs on Windows 10. Are Windows 8.1 Users getting it? Do they care?

    I opened the 'theguardian.com' realised it was slow and clunky, compared to both Firefox and Chrome on my Windows 10 build 10061 machine. Closed it, not looked at it since.

    Hated everything about IE (especially the fact I'm constantly been nagged by the latest IE11 Update that fails to install, repeatedly)

    I hate Windows Update more, Windows Update even in 10, is the exactly same shit its been for eternity.

    Windows 10's lipstick is starting to smudge. There is free, and there is unfinished, the rest of us have to pay for this shit. When will Enterprises come to their senses and ditch this crap for good, nearly everything is done in browser nowadays (or in the near future).

    Another 10 Years of Licensing of Windows 10? - no thanks.

  11. Just Enough

    thisnewsarticlesucks.com

    Well here's a non-story if there ever was one.

    Breaking news; it's possible to string together any number of different words, with the last one being "sucks", and register it as a domain! And no-one can stop you!! Why hasn't Microsoft thought of this and only done two or three?!

    1. hplasm Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: thisnewsarticlesucks.com

      It would be cheaper for MS to rename themselves as "Our Software Sucks Co.

    2. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

      Re: thisnewsarticlesucks.com

      Well here's a non-story if there ever was one.

      On the contrary - it shows there's still money to be made in this market of DNS-registration-for-the-sake-of-registration. PR organizations with more budget than sense (or possibly operating under orders to protect some executive ego) are willing to fire a few bucks at intermediaries who will do nothing but pointlessly register a handful of names.

      That's of some academic interest, and a useful reminder of just how many opportunities for legal scams the conjunction of technology and human nature afford us.

  12. JokerZero

    How much for MicrosoftEdgeBlows.com ?

  13. GitMeMyShootinIrons

    Other witticisms...

    How about:

    LifeontheEdge.com

    TheEdgeofdarkness.com

    fallingovertheEdge.com

    And - How does U2's guitarist feel about having a Microsoft browser named after him?

  14. Oninoshiko
    WTF?

    You'd have to REALLY think a product sucks to spend 2.5 kUSD for the domain to protest them.

  15. Bladeforce

    But But...

    ..who needs all these MicrosoftEdgeSucks.com and all when you cna just go to microsoft.com and see it anyway?

  16. Stimpy77

    Edge doesn't suck though, and it's not IE. Microsoft is dropping every single feature that made IE IE, including ActiveX support, layout quirks, several vendor prefixes, VBScript, and lots, lots more. They're doing this as a standards obedience effort. http://blogs.windows.com/msedgedev/2015/05/06/a-break-from-the-past-part-2-saying-goodbye-to-activex-vbscript-attachevent/

    1. Pookietoo

      Re: it's not IE

      Just because they've removed many of the things that made IE bad, doesn't mean they're left with anything good.

  17. CmdrX3

    Think I'll register one

    microsoftedgesucksballs.com ...... Just in case.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Im trying Edge out now

    Its slow, really surprisingly slow.

    On the plus side the interface looks nice.

  19. Aye

    Never seen good things about Microsoft in this online publication really.

    Here is purely anti-Microsoft site.

  20. neiliewheeliebin

    Yes this article is spot on, Edge sucks

  21. cardrvr

    Edge sucks and so does the new updated version of Firefox. Edge simply crashes my computer. FF has implemented some update that makes doing simple tasks, which used to be one step tasks, now force me to click 2 maybe 3 times to complete the same task. It's nearly impossible to comment in forum rooms because sites like Detroit News, Detroit Free Press, Slate.com does not recognized the new version (I am surprised that I can comment here). When I enter my username / password, nothing happens, and if I do happen to get into any of these rooms, it takes upward of 15 minutes of repeated entering my data to simply get in, which does not mean that I can comment. It's pointless. This all began with the updated OS system to WIN 10, Edge, and FF updates. So in fact, the culmination of all the updates makes doing simple tasks longer and aggravating. I had to dump Norton 360 because WIN 10 made it completely useless - as noted by many other users also - just Google and you'll find them. The only thing that remained the same in end-user ease was my Canon printer. It stayed the same, as hard it it is to believe, I had no problems with it. Now had I kept my old HP 6500 All-In-One printer? It would have been a nightmare to get that up and running again, as it had always been since buying it in 2009.

    1. Techie007

      Something must be wrong with your installation of Firefox. I've used it for years and haven't had any issues with it like what you described. I'm using Firefox 41.0.1 right now. Try running it in SafeMode and see if the problems persist ([Alt] -> Help -> Restart with Add-ons Disabled).

  22. Techie007

    The mentioned domains no longer appear to be active

    I just noticed that the domains mentioned in this article no longer work. They used to redirect to the Microsoft homepage. Now they throw a "Server not found" error.

  23. ProDigit

    Edge is actually a very good app,

    that's what it is, not a browser, but an app.

    It does just about everything ok.

    Here's why they suck though:

    1- Immense amounts of RAM usage. No problem when you're having 8GB of RAM, but if you're still running the 32bit version of Win10, and less than 3 or 4GB, you may be running out of memory.

    ON a regular browsing session, EDGE runs with about 1,5GB of RAM, and quickly can exceed 2,5GB, leaving ample little amounts left for OS and VRAM (In case your video memory is shared).

    2- It regularly freezes, waiting for download data, which makes the browsing experience super slow.

    3- It crashes often.

    4- Extremely slow response on the recently downloaded list.

    By the time an app runs from the Edge browser download list, you may have started it trice already, thinking perhaps your mouse was the culprit; not knowing amongst all the popups and windows notifications, which notification is from the first installation click, and which from the others.

    5- Forceful BING search.

    The edge app won't even allow you to search on Google.

    Try looking for a few things in Bing. Obviously Bing being the inferior search engine, will not always come up with the desired website results. Hopping over to Google to do the same searches, may result in one or two searches from Google, before they stop the google website from functioning. (yes, you can only search a few times on Google).

    All in all, it would be an ok browser app, if it only didn't use so much RAM, and used Google as main search engine.

    Same happened a while back with Internet Explorer only allowing you to see Bing Maps, and not Google maps correctly.

    For me, it's not a good browser, and got replaced by Chrome.

    Sorry Microsoft,

    Like usual, you know how to FUCK things up really bad, and gain disfavor from everyone!

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    MICROSOFT EDGE HATERS & SOCIAL MEDIA

    I hate Microsoft Edge too. If I used Social Media & I no longer do, I would circulate a petition for Microsoft customers who hate Microsoft Edge. I tried to complain to Microsoft, but on Microsoft Edge I have to sign into my Microsoft account that I'm already signed into before I can contact them, but for some reason Microsoft just does not let me sign in to complain & apparently Edge does not recognize that I'm signed into my Microsoft account. Bah, humbug. I wish I new how to use an OS other than Microsoft or Apple products. : (

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: MICROSOFT EDGE HATERS & SOCIAL MEDIA

      I never used to know how to use anything but DOS.

      Then Windows 3.1 came along, and I learned how to use that. Then Windows 95…

      About that time I also came to use this funny OS called Red Hat Linux 4, and another called SCO OpenServer 5.

      The technology genie is willing to grant you that wish, but it'll take more than rubbing a lamp to make it happen.

  25. Howard Hanek Bronze badge
    Linux

    Analogy

    The Microsoft Edge 'Experience' is being like being in the middle seat between two 350 pound eavesdroppers constantly annoying you to sign up for more 'services'.

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