back to article iPhone vs. Galaxy fight hospitalises two after beer bottle stabbing

Tulsa, Oklahoma, TV station KTUL is reporting that two men were left with “cuts all over their bodies … covered with blood” after an argument over the merits of Android and iOS “escalated”. The station's report suggests the two were discussing the competing merits of the iPhone and Samsung's new offering – probably the Galaxy …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Meh

    Well...

    ...that's two less commentards on here today then.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Well...

      "Well...

      ...that's two less commentards on here today then."

      Surely, you mean 'fewer'.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Well...

        Dare I suggest that there is also a distinct lack of 'question marks' in the above comments?

        1. James Haley 2
          Joke

          Re: Well...

          Well, lets get out the beer bottles and settle this...

  2. Harry the Bastard

    article misses out the most important information...

    who won?

    1. RyokuMas Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: article misses out the most important information...

      who won?

      The Windows Phone users who got the whole thing on camera...

      1. Phuq Witt

        Re: article misses out the most important information...

        *"...who won?..."*

        I think the Galaxy S6 fan just had the edge.

        1. MrDamage

          Re: article misses out the most important information...

          > *"...who won?..."*

          >> I think the Galaxy S6 fan just had the edge.

          True. You can't stab anyone with rounded corners.

      2. Nick Pettefar

        Re: article misses out the most important information...

        You mean: "on their superior camera".

        1. Vic

          Re: article misses out the most important information...

          You mean: "on their superior camera".

          Singular?

          Vic.

    2. thomas k.
      Happy

      Re: who won?

      We did.

    3. Ali on the Reg

      Re: article misses out the most important information...

      The feeble iPhone user got a good ass wupping from the obviously superior Android user

  3. Dan 55 Silver badge
    Meh

    Wrong conclusion to the report

    Stupidity, not alcohol.

    1. Paul Crawford Silver badge

      Re: Wrong conclusion to the report

      The funny thing is stupidity seems to increase quickly with alcohol consumption.

    2. h4rm0ny
      Pint

      Re: Wrong conclusion to the report

      Alcohol is to stupidity like oil is to an engine. It reduces resistance and lets you just accelerate away.

  4. choleric

    Executive summary

    Why couldn't they just take it out on their white goods like company executives do?

  5. Sealand
    Thumb Down

    That's what a flame war looks like IRL.

  6. Elmer Phud

    This sort of violence is terrible -- remember kids:

    Don't do phones!

    1. Ashton Black

      One last hit man,

      Oh just one more, I can take it. I mean, I can give it up whenever I want. It's not really a problem. They just released Hearthstone for Android. I needs it man. Cut me some slack. (etc and so on.)

    2. Simon Harris Silver badge

      Just as well the argument didn't move on to science fiction...

      http://www.theguardian.com/uk/2013/may/15/university-norwich-star-wars-club-fight

  7. Jimmy2Cows Silver badge
    Facepalm

    To protect and serve...

    < ... and one was found in the carpark of the Evergreen Apartments at 1:00 AM covered in blood. At which point the local constabulary was summoned, tossed both men in chokey ... >

    Would have thought the ER would have been a better location for carpark guy, but hey what do I know?

    Nothing like good honest Merican "justice".

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Stop

      Re: To protect and serve...

      Why waste ER with a bloody nose, minor head wound or slip lip, all of which can cause a "lot" of blood.

      A quick patch up with a paramedic / nurse / first aider is way better than clogging up A&E departments.

    2. Dabooka Silver badge

      Re: To protect and serve...

      Not really, over here plod would have chucked them in an ambulance to go to A&E (scared of death in custody) to be treated and sober up, where they get discharged and leave on their merry way the next day. Rarely a charge incurs from the the rozzers if a trip to A&E is needed.

      I'm sure I'll get downvoted, I've but been there and seen it with my own eyes too many times.

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Re: To protect and serve...

        "Not really, over here plod would have chucked them in an ambulance to go to A&E (scared of death in custody)"

        I wonder if it's something to do with the different types of cells? From what I've seen on telly, UK cells tend to be closed rooms with solid doors. US cells tend to be monkey cages and so it's far easier to see what's going on inside without having to do specific "rounds" checking on people through the peep hole every hour or so and eventually finding a dead body.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This wouldn't have happened…

    …If they had guns to defend themselves!

    1. Khaptain Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: This wouldn't have happened…

      since when were guns capable of defending themselves ?

      1. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

        Re: This wouldn't have happened…

        "since when were guns capable of defending themselves ?"

        ...Megatron...

  9. Ben79

    I did twenty years over ST vs. Amiga.

    1. Dabooka Silver badge

      I have to ask the obvious....

      which side were you?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Trollface

        Re: I have to ask the obvious....

        The losing side, the Amiga of course.

  10. jake Silver badge

    As we've been saying around these parts for over half a century ...

    Stupidity SHOULD hurt!

  11. Little Mouse

    When I was a youngster a wise man once said:

    "Now the world don't move to the beat of just one drum. What might be right for you, may not be right for some."

    The world would be a much nicer place if only more people had watched 80's tea-time TV.

  12. Unicornpiss Silver badge
    Coat

    After being arrested...

    Did they get their one phone call?

    1. Dan 55 Silver badge
      Trollface

      Re: After being arrested...

      Yes but unfortunately for the iPhone guy he was holding it wrong.

  13. eJ2095

    Would have been better if he had this ;-0

    http://global.samsungtomorrow.com/galaxy-blade-edge-chefs-edition/

  14. Alistair Silver badge
    Coat

    Hold on

    Tulsa Oklahoma?

    large amounts of alcohol.

    Argument about cell phones?

    No dead bodies? No Terrorists? No White Cops Shooting Black Dudes? No Radical Christians being oppressed by having to accept Gay lifestyle things?

    How did this make the news?

    1. Mark 85 Silver badge

      No dead bodies? No Terrorists? No White Cops Shooting Black Dudes? No Radical Christians being oppressed by having to accept Gay lifestyle things?

      How did this make the news?

      I think you just answered the question. It's news because it's different than the "normal" bodies, terrorists, etc. It's El Reg because of the IT component... cell phone argument which is a real life version of the Comments section. Hmm... maybe the Comments section needs more alcohol, blood, etc.?

  15. Alistair Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    @ej2095

    Dammit. I WANT one of those!

    (I am the cook at home....)

    Because we'd all like to teach her to cook.

    1. eJ2095

      Re: @ej2095

      Ahh it did say teach her to cook.. just had to double check

  16. hi_robb

    Hmm..

    Covered in cuts and looking for a local hospital?

    There's an app for that...

  17. Jorge Lopez
    Pint

    Sports of the 2015s

    Doesn't this sort of brawl happen over sports as well? I guess we can add this to a new type of modern day sporting event brawl

  18. thomas k.
    Thumb Up

    iPhone vs Galaxy fight hospitalizes two

    Now, *that's* fanboi-ism.

  19. skeptical i
    Devil

    Latest verse, same as the first

    Cowboys or Raiders.

    Ford or Chevy.

    $my_deity or $their_deity.

    Now it's about cellphones.

    1. Mark 85 Silver badge
      Trollface

      Re: Latest verse, same as the first

      Which is our version of your football hooligans. The difference is we usually scatter ours instead of them being all in one place.

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