back to article Solar-powered bra maker suffers 20,000 TITSUPs all at once

Solar-powered bra manufacturer Triumph International has been forced to recall 20,000 solar-powered brassieres. The Swiss-based lingerie maker is best known for its bra that allows the wearer to become her own source of renewable energy via a detachable solar panel - providing much-needed support while simultaneously …

  1. Nolveys Silver badge
    Gimp

    New-Age Flim-Flam!

    Real bras are powered by the internal combustion engine.

    1. ian 22

      Re: New-Age Flim-Flam!

      While I'd like to be supportive of this effort, it looks shocking.

  2. Locky Silver badge

    Sorry for the bother?

    Good to see they've hired Paddington for their PR

    1. Matt 21

      Re: Sorry for the bother?

      Better than saying "sorry for any inconvenience caused" as if it might not upset most people. It's honest and slightly charming... makes a nice change.

      Plus I always liked Paddington... mmmmm I fancy a marmalade sandwich now.

  3. Captain DaFt
    Coat

    So they're saying...

    That their bras are a bust?

    Because they're... <ahem>... Pokemams?

  4. frank ly Silver badge

    Previous developments

    This area of development has always been problematic.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oEfQFD0NMJQ

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qv_8SqM4upo

  5. jake Silver badge

    The Wife says:

    Purchasing teenage-mentality male human designed female clothing is never an option ... unless you have the body of a 14 year old boy.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: The Wife says:

      Of course it's a bloody option!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: The Wife says:

      I thought that the entire fashion industry designed clothes for the bodies of 14 year old boys.

    3. Preston Munchensonton
      Mushroom

      Re: The Wife says:

      When did the Wife become an option? Time to fix that fucking mistake...

  6. Mike 140

    Hunh?

    Removing the bra makes the tits go up? How does that work?

    1. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: Hunh?

      Helium filled implants?

    2. Number6

      Re: Hunh?

      I was thinking it was more TITSDOWN than TITSUP, too.

      1. Donchik

        Re: Hunh?

        Regardless of Tits up or down, should it still not read 40,000 up or down?

        Or 20,000 up, and possibly 20,000 down? Can't claim to be an expert in mammary dynamics, but I can count.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Seriously, this story was the best gift ever to the editorial team...

    Admit it.

    "Firm tells women to take them off immediately" Oh the Glee and Chortles must have been legenday.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Seriously, this story was the best gift ever to the editorial team...

      I suspect that "sucking on tits" (the water pouches) didn't quite make the cut. Or the fact that those may require squeezing.

      Sjeez, and it isn't even Friday :)

    2. Darryl

      Re: Seriously, this story was the best gift ever to the editorial team...

      Betcha not so firm after they're taken of...

  8. Arachnoid
    Joke

    I hope women

    Are not falling out over this lack of attire

  9. monkeyfish

    The Japanese lingerie maker is best known for its bra that allows the wearer to become her own source of renewable energy via a detachable solar panel - providing much-needed support while simultaneously supporting the environment.

    What? Solar panel to charge phone, ok. But how on earth does the bra come into it? It is heated or something? Does it light up? For what possible reason does it require solar panels..? This issue may require more research at home.

    1. MrT

      Triumph/Seiko tie-in...

      Solar is needed when kinetic charging is no longer operational...

  10. Sir Barry

    If any young lady is now braless and needs some support, I'm on hand to help.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Triumph...

    A former (male) colleague once went for an interview at Triumph.

    I can't be bothered to repeat the entire story he told, but he said the moment that he decided that working there was not for him was when the interviewer said that Triumph expected all their employees to be passionate about women's underwear. This is not precisely the average male demographic.

    1. ItsNotMe
      Devil

      Re: Triumph...

      "... the interviewer said that Triumph expected all their employees to be passionate about women's underwear. This is not precisely the average male demographic."

      In San Francisco it may well be "the average male demographic".

    2. Peter Simpson 1
      Joke

      Re: Triumph...

      ...passionate about women's underwear.

      Passionate about removing it, perhaps...

      1. Darryl

        Re: Triumph...

        Passionate about ladies in their underwear

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Triumph...

          But, and this was rather my point, the average male probably wouldn't mind if some women didn't wear any underwear at all.

  12. Chris G Silver badge

    Demographic

    I have to confess that I have been looking at catalogues of women's underwear since I was about 11 years old. I think that is probably quite typically a male demographic.

    A question; what was the Abenomics Bra? I don't get that.

    1. Irony Deficient

      Abenomics bra

      Chris G, I presumed that it has something to do with Japanese quantitative easing.

  13. skeptical i
    WTF?

    Solar powered underwear?

    Unless one is a backup dancer for the latest celebutramp du jour, or chooses to dress like one, just when is the solar panel supposed to get enough sun (or ambient other) light to charge? Wouldn't the panel (and cleavage-lever water bags) detract from whatever "sexy" might have been achieved by wearing one's undies as outerwear? Did they actually sell any of these things or were the 20,000 items recalled still on warehouse shelves? Sorry, apparently I missed some key plot points here ....

  14. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    Abenomics: Addressing the issue of euthanizing an aging population on a resourceless island

    Even less fathomable is the manufacturer's "Abenomics" bra that addressed the issue of boom and bust economics by honouring Prime Minister Shinzo Abe's fiscal policy plan the only obvious way.

    One girl, two cups?

  15. Mike Bell

    Bouncy Bouncy

    I find the notion of a kinetic energy converter far more appealing.

    </dream>

  16. Marketing Hack Silver badge
    Joke

    I bet Triumph Lingerie feels sheepish....

    But's that's OK, we all feel a boob on occasion!!

    1. Chika

      Re: I bet Triumph Lingerie feels sheepish....

      Quite so. In fact, I'd suspect that somebody is feeling a right tit just about now.

      1. Mark 85 Silver badge

        Re: I bet Triumph Lingerie feels sheepish....

        Or maybe the left one? <gotta' have options you know>

  17. earl grey Silver badge
    Joke

    probably to power their tit guns

    Dr. Evil would be so proud.

  18. ashdav
    IT Angle

    Where's Moss when you need him?

    Title says it all.

  19. JustWondering
    Happy

    Excuse me

    It appears you have forgotten to provide a photo to show the appearance of this model after the hazardous apparatus is safely removed to avoid any confusion for the owners.

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