back to article NORKS: We didn't hack Sony. Whoever did was RIGHTEOUS, though

North Korea has dismissed claims it was behind the crippling hack suffered by struggling film studio Sony Pictures. But a spokesman at the country's National Defence Commission said today that the attack on the company's computer system "might be a righteous deed of the supporters and sympathisers" with Norkers as they attempt …

  1. Ossi

    Response to satire

    ...is to make yourself ripe for satire.

    1. i like crisps

      Re: Response to satire

      Said it with a chinese voice in my head......very Confucius.....have onarable upvote!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Response to satire

      norks = chibi and kawaii bluster brigade

      riiiighhteous cyberhack, dude!!

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Response to satire

        You make mistake. chibi and kawaii is Japanese territory. Nork disappear people from Tokyo street via submersible, very much not kawaii.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    NORKS OUT FOR THE LADS...

    ...Er, not you Kim....you can keep your Bitch-Tits covered up mate!

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'd still like to know

    How all this data, particularly the personnel data, was stored. Didn't Sony have any of it encrypted?

    Also, is there any information on the malware & how it was injected into Sony's systems? And are the anti-virus vendors being given enough info to detect it?

    1. Naughtyhorse

      Re: I'd still like to know

      c'mon this is sony we are talking about.

      encryption (shakes head and chuckles)

  4. Peter Stone
    Happy

    a 'righteous deed'

    Surely a 'righteous hack' is the correct term to use?

    1. foo_bar_baz
      Pint

      Re: a 'righteous deed'

      "Righteous dude", surely.

      1. psychonaut

        Re: a 'righteous deed'

        haha! thats EXACTLY what i thought of too! have an upvote.

        love the bueller

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Unhappy

    If I was a Sony Pictures, reckon my Crimbo hols would be starting tomorrow due to 'stress'

  6. channel extended

    Sony New Hire?

    Perhaps the people that Sony subcontracted for thier new root kit simply misunderstood the purpose. They rootkited Sony instead of every one else.

    Gee Golly So Sorry.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Sony New Hire?

      Uh, boss. Yeah we entered "127.0.0.1" for err... testing purposes. And now...

      Like a cyber version of Lovecraftŝ "The Hound"

      In my tortured ears there sounds unceasingly a nightmare whirring and flapping, and a faint distant baying as of some gigantic hound. It is not dream - it is not, I fear, even madness - for too much has already happened to give me these merciful doubts.

      St John is a mangled corpse; I alone know why, and such is my knowledge that I am about to blow out my brains for fear I shall be mangled in the same way. Down unlit and illimitable corridors of eldrith phantasy sweeps the black, shapeless Nemesis that drives me to self-annihilation.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Happy

        Re: Sony New Hire?

        It's always a pleasure reading the works of H. P. Lovecraft. I thank you kindly for the link as well.

  7. Florida1920

    Raise your hands

    North Korea has sympathizers?

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I try to be neutral

    But North Korea puts me in mind of Woody Allen's 'Bananas'. I mean, if there ever was a Government you'd expect to order everyone to wear their underpants on the outside...

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    North Korea: 25 million people

    One DVD player.

  10. Crazy Operations Guy Silver badge

    I love it when they say 'Imperialist Americans'

    Provides a good sense of irony considering that the countries they allied themselves with (Russia, China) are far more imperialistic than the US and how both allies were ruled by emperors into the 20th century (and thus being the textbook definition of imperialistic)...

  11. John Tserkezis

    "The comedy movie in question is The Interview"

    I'm going to find and watch "The Interview" just to piss off his supreme leadership king kong (or whatever his name is).

    No wait, Sony has has a significant part in this film, so I won't be watching it after all.

    Bugger. But bide your time king bong, soon will be a film that makes fun of you and ISN'T produced by Sony, and you can rest assured I'll be watching THAT.

    1. JLV Silver badge

      You could always watch Team America. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0372588/

      Though it's making fun of Kim Jong-il, not Kim Jong-un.

      Oh, and it probably makes fun of the USA as well. Kinda.

      I'll watch The Interview. I dislike Sony, but the Kims even more so.

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