We love Muffin,
Muffin the Mule..
[an activity banned in most of the EU]
My wife is looking at online porn again. This can happen accidentally to anyone from time to time, usually while reading through the results of perfectly innocent web searches such as oyster bar or prize giving head boy. But here my wife is scrolling through pictures of men being er... “serviced” from behind by women wearing …
Alimentary dear Watson.
I need to watch it here! In Fez on great naughty / un Islamic filter.
I once heard a joke referring to chap who was murdered in Stockwell and the punch line was Brazilian. Imagine my 11 year old daughter's surprise when I asked her what it meant.
Mrs Hudson, reading between the lines, was on tap, and rather sympathetic to the two "bachelors" living together, up to the point of Watson's deviance to marriage. A very modern women, looking back, on all accounts, (although in a long term perspective, just a normal women).
My assumption* here is of a reference to the up-and-coming junior manager's incorrect quoting of 'pecking order' due to never having been down on the farm...
* this word being the subject of the only Samuel L Jackson quote that doesn't include the word that is often written as 'melonfarmer'. But not the Frank and Ernest one.
Hard to say.
On the Wikipedia page for it says: "Advice columnist Dan Savage wrote that he believes all men should try pegging at least once, as it may introduce them to a new enjoyable sexual activity and illuminate them to the receiver's perspective in sex"
So far I have not has such an 'illuminating' experience, but I'm not sure if that is something to be happy or sad about.
>Who the fck is Dan Savage and why is his column so worthy of inspection?
The gentleman in question is an amusing disclaimer of straightforward, honest, factual, helpful, and somewhat frank advice on matters of an anatomical nature for discerning gentlemen in a number of non-Murdoch periodicals on the West Coast of his Majesty's former colony.
Imagine Marjorie Proops written by Joe Orton
Perhaps all those women were also aware that "skiing" is yet another sexual practice and you attempt to excuse your poorly judged vocal ejaculations simply slipped you deeper in to bad boy territory.
OK, I think its time I got my coat...the one with Rodger's Profanasauris in the pocket, thanks...
Not pegging order. Otherwise very chortlesome thank you. But with a bitter twist - brings back all too many memories of incidents of social inadequacy, such as telling a joke to my parents then finding out the next day what it meant. Oh, and - quelle horreur - doing the same with not just my girlfriend, but my girlfriend with half a dozen of her friends. <shudder>
A Unix expert colleague was irritated by one of our other team members who was evangelizing about how much better emacs was than vi, back in the day. To exact revenge, when the emacs user went to lunch leaving his workstation unguarded my colleague hacked the start-up emacs buffer name from "Scratch" to "Snatch".
Later that day the emacs user noticed this and made an exclamation, turning a nice pink shade. He dug through the source code and found the correct name still there. Muttering to himself he started recompiling the tool. At the same time my colleague remotely accessed his workstation and, with expert timing, managed to repeat the binary edit on the executable to change the name again. You can see what happened after. The same process followed several times.
Oh how we laughed later when the evangelist had gone home feeling confused and with his faith in open source compilers quite shaken.
Many years ago, before electronic submission of quotes and the like, some readers may recall the days when companies bidding for government work used to have to be physically deliver their bids in written form on paper * by a specified time.
The usual method was that a large wooden receptacle was placed in a place near the public door to the relevant Department. Normally where the receptionist sat. And thus the young lady would have a large sign on her desk pointing to the Tender Box.
*it wasnt called hard copy then. As the concept of soft copy hadnt been invented back then**
** hard. Tee hee. Soft. Ha ha.
I once asked a Scottish lady admin who was on the phone;
How big is your cache?
Embarrassed silence for minute and she said about normal!
I said what would that be in kilobytes?
She said, could you repeat the question?
When I did she said sorry, I thought you said how big is your gash!
I still tremble at the thought.
But since others already have been, I'll just point out that a blind spot on one's retina is a feature, not a bug. It's the point where the optic nerve exits the eyeball on it's way to the brain, and hence devoid of sensory cells. So oddly enough, without a blind spot, you would not be able to see at all.
@yaac. Old view from vested interests. Designer has it right way round, otherwise humans would have a lot of internal reflection issues. Secondly, given we only have enough video CPU capacity to process about 5% in HD ITIRC, with the rest in (ahem) VGA quality, the design is quite efficient, stable and economical.
On one contract many moons ago, I had a young, female, attractive, Namibian student on an international exchange scheme working for me. One day she comes up to my desk and says "Can you give me a stiffy please?". It was at the time 3.5" floppy disks were all the rage. Apparently 5" disks are floppy...
Icon - that's what happened to the bloke sat at the next desk.
"Intrigued by the possible etymology of the American expression humdinger, she read in a dictionary of slang that it was a contraction of humming and dinger. This led to the discovery that humming too has an unrelated sexual connotation. "
And once upon a time in (parts of) the counterweight continent "dinger" also had a sexual connotation.
As Dabbsy really ought to be aware of, given that his column (fnarr fnarr) is called Something for the weekend.
*I kinda regret looking that up for you! and the paranoid part of me thinks you may have
laid set this trap deliberately.
Not that if it happened I would think it was a big deal but that description and the fact it has that name... Mind bleach please...
VME SESSION STARTS AT 17:00:07
THE EXISTING CONTEXTS FOR THE REQUIRED NODETYPE DEFINES THE STARTING POINTS FROM WHICH SELECTIONS MAY BE PERFORMED,THE SYNTAX OF THE SUPPLIED HIERARCHIC NAME IS SUCH THAT NO MEANINGFUL SELECTIONS MAY BE MADE FROM THE EXISTING POINTS FOR THE REQUIRED HIERARCHIC NAME
So on image and presentation, basically the Will Self of the IT world. Not saying it's a bad thing, but unless he takes coke on a plane with a prime minister and does a weekly commute from the Shetlands or Orkney's, (can't remember which) to London, I can't take his opinions on board. (Mind he is still a good read).
">> the Will Self of the IT world
>Except much shorter, poorer and less likely to get published in New Statesman or The Guardian. I >know this because I tried.
Maybe if he dressed up like Molly Ringwald?
(Not saying that's a good tactic, and probably not a good look for him, but.... - nope just write for the Register thank you very much, gentile poverty is the way to go)
- but then I grew up with the Carry On Films as reflections of the changing mores of contemporary British society up to the 1970s.
I remember many years ago sitting in a cinema in the Afrikaans-speaking city of Pretoria, South Africa watching a Carry On film. They were very popular films there - but the experience was culturally enlightening. All the audience would laugh at the slapstick parts. However - the verbal, or even visual, innuendoes resulted in only small pockets of the audience laughing. The rest of the audience exuded an air of puzzlement. It was obvious that the normally very strict film Afrikaans censors had also missed the jokes - and only those raised with an English language background saw them
A comms engineer was called out in the middle of the night. His normally mild boss surprised him by saying "Get down to ..... quick - their comms is in the sh*t. When he arrived he discovered that the building maintenance had been trying to clear a blockage in the toilets. After trying various caustic substances to no avail they used a drain rod. After much pushing there was a sudden movement of the obstruction. They flushed the pipe and went home - job done.
Meanwhile in the comms room on the floor below a hazardous mess worthy of an episode of Doomwatch** was spreading over the modem racks and dripping onto the floor - from the now uncoupled 4" plastic waste pipe in the false ceiling void.
**Doomwatch was a TV drama series about the unexpected dangers to the environment. Everyone of a certain age remembers the plastic eating bacteria that escaped from a research lab.
I'm pretty sure the designers of 'tar' made the command line options so difficult to remember just so that people were forced to type 'man tar'.
Always makes me laugh though, and is usually followed by a quick check on the man page for 'finger', just to check for any updates I'd missed.
A company I used to work for wrote applications for DOS (long ago, of course). At that time hard disks were limited in capacity. Every once in a while a client would call us (I was in the client service area) and say, "I've had a very strange message from your program. All of a sudden it stops and 'Pinocchio' appears on the screen. What's wrong?"
I'd say, "That means your disk is full. Delete some files and try again."
Perhaps we could avoid embarrassment if we used quite a different style of error message. My favourite is haiku, see Salon Magazine competition (which I could only find using the archive site).
On the other hand ... oh sod it. I mean, bugger. Perhaps I need to wash my mouth out...
That's why this icon is used so many times. Mine's the unwashed waterproof ...
(I need help. Shit. I mean...)
One needs to make a thorough test of the firmware/hardware interface in all modes. Development may use simulation first to ensure their component functions stand alone; followed by the use of a test vehicle perhaps. Then a full integration test using live firmware/hardware.
Mechanical types may test to destruction but I'd personally rather not use my own hardware for that purpose.
During all the repeated test cycles one has to watch for state changes resulting in future issue. If this is unintended then income may be impacted.
"Perhaps the real reason for ensuring that alert messages are dull is that walking the dog, reaping the corn and churning the milk are actually yet more euphemisms for disgusting sexual practices of which I am blissfully unaware."
A lot of people are rumoured to go "walking the dog" after dark at one of our local beauty spots.
I'm literally blind and I dropped such a clanger in a supermarket once. I was in there with my guide dog who's great in the street but finding things on the shelves is beyond what he's capable of so I naturally ask the staff to help me find X item, at which point I follow them round as they help me gather up my shopping. While I was following this member of staff I said to my guide dog "follow the lady boy" then realised how very wrong that could have been taken, luckily she hadn't noticed that it sounded like lady-boy.
Then again there's always the time he got his tail up some poor woman's skirt in Macdonalds. Having a dog in a place where people don't expect it can be quite entertaining at times, even if it is frustrating the way people behave more often.
As a sysadmin for too many years most of this IT double entendre is what makes it just abotu bearable.
Working with French guys on software releases which they insisted on calling not versions but virgins. That joke never got old. Ooo lala ziz is ze best virgin now. Or zat virgin is bugged etc etc.
Lots of "I have checked your box and its very dusty"...
Lots of multiplayer gaming with port issues and "have you fingered by port yet?" (yes i know finger is a unix email info tool but we mashed i into a double E anyway.
and lest we forget fat pipes, floppies, and gender benders.
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