back to article Ohio man cuffed again for shagging inflatable pool raft

The Ohio plastic lover arrested back in 2011 for engaging in "sexual activity" with a pink inflatable swimming pool raft has been cuffed again for the same offence. Edwin Tobergta, 35, was taken into custody on Wednesday after witnesses claimed to have clocked him naked and "performing simulated sex acts with a pink raft" on …

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  1. Cliff

    Oh come on,

    We've all done it, right?

    Right?

    1. Andy Roid McUser

      Re: Oh come on,

      Who down-voted Cliff ?? Serious sense of humour failure...

      1. Jedit

        "Who down-voted Cliff ?? "

        Some guy called Tobergta, I think.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Funny. Wonder how these people develop such obsessions?

    There's a cornish guy that got slammed for sexual activity with cow pats - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cornwall-27643702

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      There was a case in Scotland where council officials used a master key to break into a man's flat where they found him having sex with his bicycle. I think he was put on probation but I found it difficult to understand what he had broken as it was all happening behind a locked door and presumably consensual.

      http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/7095134.stm

      1. DougS Silver badge

        Reminds of something I read in the newspaper years ago

        Some southern state found to their horror they didn't have a law against bestiality on the books. There was a debate in their legislature and some were advocating that no law was needed because it could fall under the jurisdiction for their law against rape.

        One senator had a problem with that, because a person having consensual sex with an animal would be free to do so, which cannot be allowed. He was asked how you could tell if an animal is consenting? His reply, "if it doesn't move away"

        1. Casca

          Re: Reminds of something I read in the newspaper years ago

          Sweden doesn't have a law against it. It falls under cruelty against animals.

        2. Simon Harris Silver badge

          Re: Reminds of something I read in the newspaper years ago

          "a person having consensual sex with an animal would be free to do so, which cannot be allowed. He was asked how you could tell if an animal is consenting?"

          Remember folks, neigh always means neigh.

          1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
            Happy

            Re: Reminds of something I read in the newspaper years ago

            What about "cluck"?

            ...

            "How was it for you darling?"

            "baaaaaaaaaa-d"

        3. thomas k.

          Re: Reminds of something I read in the newspaper years ago

          Yes, just because the animal might be dressed provocatively doesn't mean they are asking/looking for sex.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        The bike sex one was that the cleaners broke in and he didn't stop having sex with the bike when they opened the door.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Didn't stop ?

          You mean there's a law in bonnie Scotland that you have to stop having sex if someone comes in?!

          1. NogginTheNog
            Coat

            Re: Didn't stop ?

            "You mean there's a law in bonnie Scotland that you have to stop having sex if someone comes in?!"

            Not if they're using the rear entrance.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: Didn't stop ?

              "Not if they're using the rear entrance"

              Maybe they'll get off and put on probe-ation?

        2. Gordon 10 Silver badge
          Unhappy

          Bike sex

          From memory didnt the poor b*stard get lumped on the sex offenders register too? So now everyone automatically assumes he's a paediatrican.

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        they found him having sex with his bicycle. I think he was put on probation but I found it difficult to understand what he had broken as it was all happening behind a locked door and presumably consensual.

        Yeah, you never know what rings people's bells. Or he could be into chains, or rubber, or like it greasy. Presumably he didn't use s saddle.

        I'll be here all week.

      4. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        There was a case in Scotland

        That one was interesting predominantly on technical grounds - how exactly do you sh*g a bike I may ask?

        As far as happening behind a locked door and presumably consensual... A few years back, one of the janitors in a well known UK teaching hostpital got fired for having a sexual intercourse with a Henry Vacuum Cleaner http://www.henryvacs.co.uk/acatalog/Numatic_Homecare_Range.html?gclid=CPzRtZCL_74CFW_LtAod_GkAeQ

        1. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

          Re: There was a case in Scotland

          Actually a Polish building contractor: http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/03/03/hoover_incident/

    2. Shaha Alam

      "Wonder how these people develop such obsessions?"

      male + time + boredom

  3. JayBizzle

    I think the real story here is how they fail to address his mental health problems and simply lock him away. It isn't going to help the guy as he obviously has a problem, and the big problem isn't necessarily that he choses to get amorous with plastic, it is where he does it in full view in a public place.

    1. ysth

      Address his mental health problems? How un-American. Mentally ill people belong homeless on the street or in jail.

      "if the court will give me the chance ... I will give it 100 per cent. I am ready to get my life together and quit all this nonsense." - much virtue in "if".

      1. sisk Silver badge

        Address his mental health problems? How un-American.

        Sadly accurate. 95% of the mass shootings that the media always go nuts over are perpetrated by people known to have mental health problems that have been ignored. Unfortunately for us it's much more popular to blame an inanimate object for such things than to admit that we, as a society, has done something horribly, terribly wrong.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      I think the real story here is how they fail to address his mental health problems and simply lock him away

      Hell, I think the court should be locked up for provoking it (brain's to tired to find the proper term for it) - after all, he did say he'd do away with this silliness if they let him go. They didn't, so he didn't. Duh :).

  4. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Got to love the law....

    ...no better in the UK.

    So you have 2 options:

    1. Help him get treatment and hopefully prevent re-offending. Cost couple of thousand pounds.

    2. Throw him in jail, most likely lead to further mental issues, re-offending, jail, re-offending, jail and so on and so on. Cost, many 10's of thousands of pounds.

    Still better to slash money to things designed to stop offending and instead build more jails and pack them in tighter. The reason? Easier for the accounts to prove how many people are locked up instead of how many people you stopped getting locked up.

    Gotta love this fucked up world.

    1. Vladimir Plouzhnikov

      Re: Got to love the law....

      ...or buy him a new pink lilo and tell him to stay at home while he's at it. Cost - GBP 10.00

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Got to love the law....

        ...or buy him a new pink lilo and tell him to stay at home while he's at it. Cost - GBP 10.00

        You could encourage him to go for the Darwin award by doing this at sea and see if he makes it back in time if he makes it spring a leak.

        1. Vladimir Plouzhnikov

          Re: Got to love the law....

          Well, I don't think he is a threat to our genome as he is, the poor sod.

          Unless the lilo gets pregnant of course.

    2. MrXavia

      Re: Got to love the law....

      at least in the UK the NHS Would pay for his mental health treatment, but i agree there is too much imprisonment, unless your violent, prison is pointless, better to have rehabilitation & community service.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Got to love the law....

        Speaking as someone whose currently waiting for mental health treatment on the NHS (been waiting 6 months, told waiting list is currently another 6 months), I'm not sure that in the UK he would get the help he clearly needs in sufficeintly timely fashion to prevent more public-displays of inappropriate behaviour.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Got to love the law....

          'I'm not sure that in the UK he would get the help he clearly needs in sufficeintly timely fashion'

          I've been convinced for - well, since the Tories got in back in Maggie's day - that what the UK Govt. wants is for the mentally ill to kill themselves. It has been the inevitable outcome, as seen by those not in strategic denial, of most policies on benefits and mental-health ever since. And because of the popularity of said policies among the reactionaries who comprise the bulk of the voting electorate, all subsequent HMGs have continued in the same vein regardless of the colour of their rosette.

          Football hooliganism has been all-but-banished from our shores, but the spirit remains in the Commons. So I guess it isn't the rosettes. Must be something more fundamental. Well, mental, anyway. How about, HMG and it's pretenders don't want an informed approach to mental health, because when the whole electorate understands, they'll see that the ones who should really be locked up are making the laws?

  5. oblivion
    Joke

    At least is wasn't a blue raft..

    ..because that would just be gay.

  6. Version 1.0 Silver badge

    Puritan sexual habits

    In my state, Louisiana, oral sex between consenting husband and wife is still illegal - however I've never heard of the natives going at it with plastic rafts (that would be kinky). Mostly the locals seem to find dog, cows and horses more attractive.

    Not me however, I'd rather stay at home and break the law.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Mebs he just misunderstood some advice.

    'F*ck it. Li-lo for a while'.

    1. Jason 41
      Coffee/keyboard

      Re: Mebs he just misunderstood some advice.

      You git!

  8. Simon Harris Silver badge
    Coat

    Hose...

    I used to get sexual satisfaction spraying myself from the garden hose, but now the water's stopped coming out....

    It's just been getting too kinky!

  9. Mitoo Bobsworth
    Joke

    Poor soul, I think he got the wrong idea...

    ...when someone said it needed pumping.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    I wonder if he felt like he'd let the raft down... depends where the valve was I suppose.

  11. Billa Bong

    Had to be a Lester article...

    I knew this was an article by good-ol' Lester as soon as I saw the title. However, in an interesting development you've given up trying to turn an IT angle on them... Come on commentards, someone needs to find a dubious link between a pink lilo and the IT world...

    1. Allan George Dyer Silver badge
      IT Angle

      Re: Had to be a Lester article...

      But lilo has been replaced by grub.

  12. Anonymous Coward 101

    If this guy had beaten someone up or robbed a shop at gunpoint, I wouldn't be reading about him on The Register. But because he, apparently not right in the head, committed a minor sex crime involving a lilo, I'm reading about him.

    The stories you read about in the press (and found on Google for years to come) are either the most heinous and the most pathetic.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      If this guy had beaten someone up or robbed a shop at gunpoint, I wouldn't be reading about him on The Register. But because he, apparently not right in the head, committed a minor sex crime involving a lilo, I'm reading about him.

      And where, prey tell, does it say you HAVE to read it?

  13. Graphsboy

    It's not his fault he has mental health problems. I think this is being blown up out of all proportion.

  14. Mike Moyle Silver badge
    Coat

    There's a raft of things wrong with this story.

    Sorry...

  15. Ian Michael Gumby Silver badge
    Joke

    Sexism at its worst!

    If a woman can take a plastic lover, why can't this guy?

    And what if he was caught masturbating while wearing a latex suit? How would that be any different?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Sexism at its worst!

      And what if he was caught masturbating while wearing a latex suit? How would that be any different?

      He'd be more careful with farting while he was at it.

  16. CrosscutSaw

    Plausible

    I've been to Ohio... they are a little low on female talent. That inflatable raft was probably the best looking date he could find! LOL.

    1. Ian Michael Gumby Silver badge

      Re: Plausible

      You must be mistaken. Sounds like you were visiting Ann Arbor Michigan.

  17. handle

    "simulated" sex acts?

    Why a simulated sex act? I thought only actors did that.

  18. Stevie Silver badge

    Bah!

    For God's sake, someone get this poor man a proper inflatable partner.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    If they ever film this one..

    .. I want to have the movie titles played over Bowie's "Under pressure"

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