back to article SACRILEGE! Hitchhiker's Guide game's back ... and it TWEETS at you

We've all heard that things were better back in the day. But when it comes to computer games, El Reg has uncovered concrete evidence that the past was pretty rubbish. The Beeb has re-released an old text adventure based on Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy to celebrate the 30th anniversary of the day it first hit the shops. …

COMMENTS

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  1. Neoc

    erm... no thanks. I'll dig out my old Z-file and fire up an emulator, thank-you-very-much.

  2. MrT

    Are they expecting...

    ...a tweetstorm every time someone new to the game feeds the cheese sandwich to the small dog?

    Time to have a nice cuppa and see how this idea develops.

    1. Stuart Elliott

      Re: A nice cuppa

      Would that be of Tea or No Tea ?

      1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
        Joke

        Re: A nice cuppa

        No, it will be a cup filled with a liquid which is almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea.

        Thank you the marketing department of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation

        Share and Enjoy!

        1. MrT

          Re: A nice cuppa

          'Er, yes. With milk'

          'Squirted out of a cow?'

          'Well, in a manner of speaking I suppose ...'

        2. dogged

          Re: A nice cuppa

          Have you noticed that McDonalds are using the slogan "Share and Enjoy!" for some sort of bucket of stuff which is almost, but not quite, entirely unlike edible food?

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: A nice cuppa - McDonalds

            I hadn't, because the last time I was in a McDonalds was in a suburb of Frankfurt in 1992, when all the real restaurants had shut and I realised it would have been better to go back to the hotel and eat all the peanuts in the minibar, also I drank something which called itself a milkshake but I don't think it had ever been near a cow - sorry, flashback there - but yes, it seems highly appropriate.

            1. Arachnoid

              McDonalds

              Modeled after the Restaurant at the end of the universe possibly

        3. Gannettt

          Re: A nice cuppa

          Reminds me of a similar line by Spike Milligan: "these two are identically different, except for the other one" One thing i miss since I moved to the States, surreal humour!

  3. Forget It
    Thumb Up

    BTW you can also listen to the first episode here:

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b007jlzj#context

    at least for the few days, when another one comes along to take it's place.

    1. Ian Yates

      Or iPlayer for 5 more days. Enjoying it right now :)

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is it my age?

    I'm 40 btw....

    But every time I get a screen on an 'Application' that asks if I want to 'Share' my achievement I get a surge of anger and a desire to feed the software firm in question to a Bugblatter beast.

    Yes, I just watched a jolly froody film and NO I FSCKING DON'T WANT TO TWEET ABOUT IT you utter BASTARDS.

    1. VinceH Silver badge

      Re: Is it my age?

      It's definitely not your age - because I feel the same way and I'm not your age*.

      I notice the likes of Amazon now also try to encourage you to tweet about it when you buy something.

      Utter, utter bastards.

      * I'm older.

    2. toxicdragon

      Re: Is it my age?

      Mid 20s here so close to the intended audiences age on social media. I get that urge too, never understood it.

  5. The Vociferous Time Waster

    Leather goddess

    I seem to recall this had the same engine as Leather Goddess of Phobos. Now there are a set of achievements we should tweet about. Nice gorilla.

    1. MrT

      Re: Leather goddess

      ...chocolate bar, sugar rush, etc...

      I had a box set on 5.25" discs, HHGTTG, LGoP and Zork. Probably still in the attic, next to the drive and maps drawn on graph paper, unspun in at least 15 years. Time well spent :-)

  6. Mystic Megabyte Silver badge
    Stop

    Tweet?

    What's that?

    1. Stuart Elliott

      Re: Tweet?

      Something twits (or is that twats?) do.

    2. TRT Silver badge

      Re: Tweet?

      Something birds do. Which, oddly, is the chosen form the THHGTTG V2.0, you know, the evil version intent on destroying all human life.

  7. Mike Dunderdale

    Do they expect

    us to Share and Enjoy?

  8. RyokuMas Silver badge
    Stop

    When games with spoon-fed gameplay came along...

    "...before falling out of fashion when games with proper graphics came along."

    Give me a text adventure with some substance rather than these massive glorified cut-scenes that AAA titles have become, any day.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: When games with spoon-fed gameplay came along...

      How about a MUD based on the works of prachett?

      Discworld.starturtle.net

      Play most days myself and love it.

  9. Snarf Junky

    Here I am, brain the size of a planet, and they ask me to tweet about a bloody game. Call that job satisfaction, because I don't.

    1. Martin

      Don't try to summon my enthusiasm, because I haven't got one.

      1. MrT
        Facepalm

        Enthusiasm or not...

        ...I'd have thought the Robot Academy would've taught you to spell your own name correctly... couple of letters awry in the middle there, Marvin old chap... ;-)

  10. Crisp Silver badge

    Infocom games are cool again? Awesome!

    Say what you like about those old games, but they knew how to put together a proper boxed copy back in those days.

    It wasn't just a bunch of disks and a manual. You got that and so much more that made the game seem so real that for a few hours you'd really feel like some kind of adventurer (or an intergalactic hitchhiker).

    1. TRT Silver badge

      Re: Infocom games are cool again? Awesome!

      I've got a bit of pocket lint around here somewhere...

    2. Jedit

      Re: Infocom games are cool again? Awesome!

      The best part of the H2G2 game was the ziplock bag containing your very own microscopic space fleet, and the replica demolition orders for Arthur's house and the Earth which differed only in that one was written in Vogon.

      Infocom gave the best extras. Planetfall had three bags of scented goo to match the food packets in the game, The Lurking Horror contained your character's student card and Leather Goddesses of Phobos had a scratch and sniff card to use at various points in the game. (OK, maybe not so much that last one, but still.)

      1. TRT Silver badge

        Re: Infocom games are cool again? Awesome!

        Did they also do that Death Cruise thing with a decoder wheel? Microprose gave you a keyboard overlay for e.g. Gunship on the Amiga.

        1. Jedit

          "Did they also do that Death Cruise thing with a decoder wheel?"

          Cruise For A Corpse? No, that was Delphine Games.

  11. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge

    Knock, Knock, BBC

    What should the program morph hitchhiker to crack computer coder playing to Global Operating Devices? Would the secrets shared there to be aired be too hot for the BBC to handle without politically incorrect involvement and out of the ordinary interference by others aware of such a master pilot proposal?

    IT isn't supposed to be secret, is it, and/or not proposed and supported to be a kept secret, is it?

    Oh well, .. sorry about that. However, valuable lessons have been earned and positions aired for suitable revelation, which is always uplifting.

  12. En_croute

    Took me ages to leave the house...

    .... as I didn't know what a "fluff covered analgesic" was.

    #somanydayslost

  13. Joefish

    Oh the joys of the text adventure...

    YOU TOUCHED THE KEYBOARD. ALL DOORS SLAM SHUT AND WILL ONLY OPEN ON SOME RIDICULOUSLY CONTRIVED WORD PAIRING YOU CAN ONLY GUESS AT.

    YOU TOUCHED THE KEYBOARD AGAIN. SOMETHING DROPS FROM ABOVE AND STINGS. YOU ARE DEAD.

    YOU HAVE COMPLETED 1% OF THIS ADVENTURE

    PLAY AGAIN? Y/N

    1. Tom 35 Silver badge

      Re: Oh the joys of the text adventure...

      Back to candy crush for you. You can go beg for more lives from your friends on facebook.

      1. Joefish

        Re: Oh the joys of the text adventure...

        Candy Crush? If that's all you can suggest as an alternative then you live a sad, sad life...

  14. Valerion
    Alien

    No mention of his birthday?

    He would have been 62 today.

    Of course, he's not really dead. He's just spending a few years that way for tax reasons.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: No mention of his birthday?

      Don't.

      He was born one year later than I was and when he died I had a serious rethink about my life. There were just so many other better qualified candidates for early termination, it just goes to show there is no justice and no purpose to the universe.

      Well, he did keep trying to tell us that.

  15. moiety

    The Beeb - going for the vote for who will be first up against the wall when the revolution comes.

    1. Snarf Junky

      If that's Russel Brand's revolution here's hoping it fails miserably and he's hung drawn and quartered...repeatedly.

  16. Stevie Silver badge

    Bah!

    A horrible game that makes tax instructions look interesting.

    And for the GUI generation we have a close second for the Prix Ghastlé: Starship Titanic.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Bah! Troll

      troll olol

      1. Stevie Silver badge

        Re: Bah! Troll

        No. Owner of both games. Well, I say "games" but I mean "worthless wastes of time".

        My HHGTTG came packaged with A Mind Forever Voyaging and Return to Zork so people could see that not all text adventure games were as much fun as a tax audit.

        Starship Titanic is poorly implemented, eschewing the common wisdom of everyone else in the game industry on such matters as where and how hard to block progress and how big to make "hot zones". I suspect it fell afoul of the daft developer politics loudly touted about on The Webz (then rescinded when the obvious to everyone but the team happened and The Money Ran Out).

        So 8oP

  17. Tommy Pock

    I'm stuck on the bridge of The Heart Of Gold. AGAIN.

    1. John Crisp

      "I'm stuck on the bridge of The Heart Of Gold. AGAIN."

      Apply first rules.... Find your towl. Don't Panic ???

  18. Jim 15

    I still have my copy of the 1980s game, complete with the glasses and Don't Panic button badge, 5¼ inch floppy disc and all.

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