back to article Samsung: Men, our Gear smartwatch will make you a hit with the sexy ladies

Samsung has a new advert for its Gear smartwatch that suggests it's the must-have technology for the latest generation of stalkers and smooth-talking lounge lizards. Youtube video of the advert The ad depicts two men competing for the affections of an attractive female snowboarder in some wintry resort. One, a skier with a …

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  1. LarsG

    A hit with women?

    Really, I suppose they still believe flares, the mullet, pony tails on balding men, long nails, Tom Selleck moustaches, shiny suits, tank tops, purple shell suits, Y-fronts are still a fashionable look as well?

    Ok, I know this is all still fashionable in Germany, but come on this is the UK where girls prefer the inebriated bare chested, beer bellied, football club tattooed on the shoulder kind of guy.

    This watch would be just too feminine for them, simply because it just does not have enough bling to it.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: A hit with women?

      It's just a reflection of the demographic of their users based on market research ;)

      1. ThomH Silver badge

        Re: A hit with women?

        By including a single male with a Gear in the advert, they could not only have reflected their device's demographic in the abstract but have included every single person so far to buy one.

        Smart watches are a solution without a problem.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: A hit with women?

      Honestly who are they trying to kid - methinks they have spent a bit too much on marketing that they are willing to do / say anything.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Well when you can't nick others R&D...

    You have to come up with a reason for people to buy a pile of steaming S&*t.

    This is such a rubbish product compared to the pebble and other smart watches, plus the pebble only cost $150 and works with android and iOS. Also the pebble has an SDK.

    Bet Dyson and Apple are laughing their heads off as this is the cr@p that Samesung come up with when left to do their own R&D.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Well when you can't nick others R&D...

      It was always ever a plot to make Samsung waste money developing it while Apple have never had any intention of doing the same.

      A misinformation game.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Hi Tim Cook !

      Yes we recognised you.... are you so insecure you need to troll the competition on tech blogs?

      Well, merry x-mas anyway :-)

    3. Number6

      Re: Well when you can't nick others R&D...

      +1 for the Pebble, I was given one as a gift last week, having not worn a watch for the past 20 years. Nice bit of kit.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Well when you can't nick others R&D...

        Yup, my friend has had a pebble since pretty much when it was released. Not seen it much since, he tends to prefer the one he can, well you know, quickly tell the time with.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Well when you can't nick others R&D...

        Guess that proves any watch is better than no watch?

    4. John 104

      Re: Well when you can't nick others R&D...

      Bwahahaha!

      They are ALL rubbish, not just Samsung's. As the poster above said, it is a solution looking for a problem.

  3. Kevin McMurtrie Silver badge
    Unhappy

    Just a momentary problem... I'll have the Samsung up in no time. I swear this never happens. Let me try it without the gloves... Yeah, yeah, yeah.... No! It just sits there limp and stupid. Maybe it's cold and needs to be warmed up. Rebooting... Hey, where are you going?

  4. Arachnoid

    UK Advertising

    I dont think thats likely to get past the UK Advertising Standards Authority filters

    1. Tromos

      Re: UK Advertising

      Advertising Standards Authority filters? Oh, you mean those things that kick in after 29 days of a one month advertising campaign.

      1. jonathanb Silver badge

        Re: UK Advertising

        No, the ones that kick in about 6 months after the ad campaign is finished.

  5. Bob Vistakin
    Thumb Down

    That ad is a different kind of awful

    One for which a word has not yet been invented.

  6. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge
    Facepalm

    A watch makes you sexy? Bollocks

    nothing more to be said really.

  7. Evil Graham

    Nothing will ever top

    The Windows 7 "host your own launch party" ads:

    http://gawker.com/5366070/host-your-own-awful-party-for-windows-7

    1. Rik Myslewski
      Thumb Up

      Re: Nothing will ever top

      It's hard to beat the Vista SP1 video, as well. "Bruce ServicePack and the Vista Street Band", indeed...

      1. beep54
        Happy

        Re: Nothing will ever top

        to Evil Graham and Rik Myslewski:

        Damn you! Damn you both to Hell for those links. My eyes!!! My ears!!!! Aaaarrrrrrgggghhhhhh!!!!!!!!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Nothing will ever top

      What about "host your own funeral" with Windows 8.1 update?

      1. TheRealRoland

        Re: Nothing will ever top

        yeah, am holding off (still) upgrading my Samsung book 8 laptop to 8.1... too many issues with video card drivers

        1. TheRealRoland

          Re: Nothing will ever top

          really, a down vote for that? read this...

          http://forum.notebookreview.com/samsung/734915-win-8-1-dont-upgrade-until-samsung-has-updated-drivers-4.html

          and still it hasn't been successful for most people.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Nah..

    Personally I would buy the Pebble if I were in the market for such a device, and I'm not. First of all, I already have enough things to charge when I travel, and secondly I like my conversations more private.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    You aren't going to win over the ladies with Samsung kit. You just look like Mr Generic plastic trash man.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The only kind of watch women find sexy is...

    one that costs $17,000 and women recognize it for being that expensive.

    Otherwise you may as well wear a Ron Burgundy inspired Timex.

  11. stupormundi

    I managed to watch part of the video ...

    ... muted.

    So, a new kind watch especially designed for dicks, what else is new.

  12. Tom Chiverton 1

    'taking surreptitious photos and video of her '

    Srsly ? Geez ...

  13. edge_e
    Facepalm

    Surely it's

    Drown your sorrows?

  14. Oninoshiko

    crap commercal

    Of course, the smart-watch is a crap idea for a product too... so, what did you expect?

  15. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
    Mushroom

    Hey pretty lady...

    <Huuuuueeeeyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!>

  16. Terry 6 Silver badge

    Wow! A watch for secret stalkers

    What a great marketing idea!

    Oh wait.....

  17. WibbleMe

    A hit on Women well there goes 50% of the market (if your a woman).

    Also why would I want something on my wrist that emits micrwoave raidiation?

  18. Benchops

    There's nothing more attractive than

    a man with more money than sense. Anyone with a Samsung Gear can easily be identified as such...

  19. Montreal Sean

    That turned me off the Gear.

    Who came up with that train wreck?

  20. SpiderPig

    Utter Rubbish

    If Samsung think that this lame attempt at humour will get people buying their lame attempt at producing something that noone really wants at present then they have another thing coming.

    Oh Jack.....you really are a dickhead and a loser aren't you?

  21. Dan 55 Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Wow, it's a smart watch

    Samsung might have more success flogging it dragging The Hoff out of retirement.

    1. ElReg!comments!Pierre Silver badge

      Re: Wow, it's a smart watch

      Only oveweight US women in their late 50s find DH attractive. I guess "people who want to land an overweight US woman in her late 50s" was not the core market Sammy had in mind for the Gear.

  22. DerekCurrie Bronze badge
    Facepalm

    And don't forget the Aussie outback hat!

    kekeke!

  23. Fihart

    Strategy as Execution.

    "Research" aka lowest common denominator, suggests that single men will buy unnecessary tech stuff (they bought ugly and barely functional early digital watches). Single men may even fantasize that ownership of the latest thing will attract the ladeez. *

    That's the strategy, now come up with a creative concept !

    Probably the hapless ad agency creatives came up with something a little more evolved, but the suits or the client shot it down as not matching strategy. So they made an ad of the strategy.

    * Of course, in the real world, women are demonstrably uninterested in such stuff and even less interested in the sort of geeks who buy it..

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It was bad until... it got worse

    Look at the last 2 seconds of the ad. Say no more.

  25. TheProf
    Devil

    I liked it!

    The acting was as good as anything I've been forced to endure on C4/ITV/BBC.

    And it was funnier than any 'comic' on same.

    Well done Samsung for a wonderful parody of our vacuous society.

  26. ElReg!comments!Pierre Silver badge

    I'm sorry, can someone explain?

    I just watched the thing (without sound obviously, cuz you know, work) and I found it several times less annoying than pretty much any of the other ads currently being broacast. Does it have something to do with the soundtrack, or is it the "people using pointless gadgetry to impress the opposite sex" part that is getting your panties in a twist? Because I'm pretty sure that's been standard operating procedure since Adam lost a rib. Childish perhaps, but shocking? I think not.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I'm sorry, can someone explain?

      Samsung fanboy perhaps? Not shocked at the advertised stalk-mode camera?

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

      2. This post has been deleted by its author

      3. ElReg!comments!Pierre Silver badge

        Re: I'm sorry, can someone explain?

        > Samsung fanboy perhaps?

        Not particularly, no. I don't own any end-user product made by them (although I am well aware that some components of my stuff may come from them).

        > Not shocked at the advertised stalk-mode camera?

        It has a camera cunningly camouflaged as big black lens protruding in the middle of a bright orange plasic band, if that's what you mean by "advertised stalk-mode camera". What does it have to do with anything (apprt from being somewat ugly)?

  27. Ali on the Reg

    I thought the same when I brought a Samsung Galaxy Tab 7.7

    It was great at first, It was after all their high-end OLED tablet.

    Now however the ladies, upon hearing it still runs Android 4.0, make excuses and shuffle off with a look of disgust. All because Samsung can't be arsed with you once they have your money (not that I'm bitter of course).

  28. Gartal

    When I was kid there was a crappy cartoon on the teev named Dick Tracy. Dick Tracy owned a watch with a built in radio. He would hold his wrist to the corner of his mouth and say in a butch masculine voice things like "Dick Tracy calling Joe Jitsu, Dick Tracy calling Joe Jitsu, come in Joe Jitsu" It was sort of the limit of cartoon imagination based on then current technology. All radios glowed in the dark and could be used as room heaters thanks to their rows of thermionic valves.

    The pox video we have all just watched (ha ha ha ha ha ha) shows our creepy hero(?) videoing the socially challenged (blank? stupid? naïve? dumb as a sack of hammers?) woman skiing down a hill and on the replay she is perfectly centred, even though the dork filming her is also moving. One question, how is it possible? This is a camera on his wrist, not a steady cam.

    I am a member of The Old Farts Club and one of the rules for entry along with aching joints, encroaching deafness and pointless tales about the Good Old Days, is that you have to be Vision Challenged. Reading some things on my HTC One requires that I put on my glasses. Reading the installation key from a Microsoft COA also requires reaching for a magnifying glass. Trying to read a web site on a postage stamp, even a commemorative sized postage stamp will be an exercise in pure futility.

    And all of the other crap. Battery life? Multitasking? Cut and Paste? Repositioning the cursor in a block of text? Storage? Usefulness? Ya boo sucks.

    Companies continue to do things with wrist watches and people continue to stay away. As already pointed out, a solution looking for a problem.

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Well if its a good as their Android 4.3 update (second attempt) then there are going to be a lot of very unhappy people....

    Can El Reg pop over to the Samsung Mobile UK Facebook page, read the comments and then ask Samsung UK just what the hell is going on? Apparently their CEO says there are NO problems with their updates.

  30. MrXavia

    Crap advert, it just shows two clumsy guys, both drop phones easily.. but one has an idiot box strapped to his arm... I could not see either guy actually picking up a girl that easily with or without the tech...

    While a dick tracy watch has some uses I guess, a bluetooth headset is more useful, and a simple watch to dial is handy...

    the funny thing I find is that even with my bluetooth headset, I need to UNLOCK the phone before the headset will go into speech recognition mode... and so far i've never found speech recognition to be any good, its always slower than buttons...

  31. pctechxp

    LG got there first

    A wrist mounted phone with a bluetooth headset is a good idea in theory but it just doesn't work in practice.

    So why do they think a watch linked to a phone is a better idea?

  32. Jess
    Joke

    Putting the twat into wrisTWATch.

  33. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Methinks the commentards doth protest too much. Perhaps irate that the unit will not work as advertised?

  34. Gord

    Reddit people?

    So folks on Reddit don't like the ad. Better scrap it then. The other 99.9999% of the planet will undoubtably fall in line with their wise opinions.

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I read the article but didn't have time to actually watch it (if you pardon the pun) - now I have and really OMG that is about the worst thing I have ever seen. Ultra cheese and if you want people to aspire or even relate to being the guy (aka stalker) who gets the girl I can't imagine it working.

    If I were a woman think I'd be far more afraid than flattered about this (stalker) guy who I keep (not) randomly bumping into and who takes pictures of me as I'm boarding. Who else was hoping for his phone to fall off the rail...?

  36. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Chick Magnets? Like Toe-Cams...

    These wearable gadgets are as much "Chick Magnets" as are toe-cams for taking upskirt shots.

    Sure, toe-cams are chick magnets because you'll always find them around sexy girls, but the girls are likely running away or calling the Cops...

  37. Sheep!

    I think the little shake of the hand he does right at the end of the advert sums up the type of person he is perfectly.

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