back to article Ahhh, SATISFACTION: Watch while we set a NAS on FIRE

A vendor has made the silly mistake of claiming its kit is fireproof, prompting a certain El Reg hack to ponder where he'd left his matches... The vendor in question is IOsafe, whose products have been reviewed on El Reg before. Last time, its single-disk unit survived being dunked in a well for far longer than originally …

COMMENTS

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  1. Graham Marsden
    Coat

    But...

    ... can you burn a DVD?

  2. fajensen Silver badge

    Dissapointed

    I read it as .... "Watch while we set NSA on FIRE", which is one solution to that particular problem

  3. ISYS
    Coat

    Someone call the Fire BIG RAID.............

    Sorry!

  4. jai

    excellent stuff

    it's like an episode of Brainiac!!

    well played El Reg

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Finally, the wiener thrusting story we've all been waiting for. Well done Canada.

  6. The First Dave Silver badge

    REID ? WTF is that all about, and why have I never heard of her before?

    1. Lord Raa

      I believe it is a reference to Tara Reid.

      I could be wrong though.

      1. Martin Budden Bronze badge

        Maybe because it looks like a house? Tenuous, I know.

  7. Rob

    I do like...

    ... the baby LED suit that is recommended at the end of this video, looking forward to REID as well of course.

  8. Dave K Silver badge

    Reminds me of a few years ago when HP fired a bullet through one of their disk arrays. That one did actually survive (well obviously, or else they wouldn't have shown the footage). I'm intrigued to see how this one pans out!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Oh, so THAT's why...

      "Reminds me of a few years ago when HP fired a bullet through one of their disk arrays. That one did actually survive (well obviously, or else they wouldn't have shown the footage). I'm intrigued to see how this one pans out!"

      Oh, so *that's* why disks have a hole in the middle!

      It all makes sense now.

    2. sisk Silver badge

      I suspect they did that the same way that Masterlock did their famous "We shot it and it still works" video. Basically if you fire enough rounds into fresh devices eventually one of them is going to get hit in just the right place to survive the punishment. In Masterlock's video it took something like 150 takes according to a locksmith I know. I wonder how many disk arrays HP destroyed in the name of marketing.

      1. Tabor
        Coat

        ma(s)t(er)lock

        I read this as "Matlock", and was already asking google for the episode this was in... even re-reading I need to focus to not read ""Matlock". Would've loved an episode with this as the key element.

        I'll ask the nurse for wheelchair and coat.

      2. the spectacularly refined chap

        I suspect they did that the same way that Masterlock did their famous "We shot it and it still works" video. Basically if you fire enough rounds into fresh devices eventually one of them is going to get hit in just the right place to survive the punishment. In Masterlock's video it took something like 150 takes according to a locksmith I know. I wonder how many disk arrays HP destroyed in the name of marketing.

        The Master advert really was the real deal. I remember hearing of someone repeating the test and yes the Master lock survived. But then so did all the other brands they tried. It shouldn't come as too much of a surprise: a lock is essentially solid metal and regular non-armour penetrating bullets are simply not designed to penetrate them.

  9. Omgwtfbbqtime Silver badge
    Mushroom

    Channelling Mythbusters

    Now - kill it with fire - I mean really kill it.

    1Kg of termite in a couple of plant pots.

    that would be probably the worst case without access to fissionables.

    1. Lockwood

      Re: Channelling Mythbusters

      That's a lot of termites!

      1. Hellcat

        Re: Channelling Mythbusters

        476190 termites. Sounds like a new El Reg CI unit in the making.

        1. Lockwood

          Re: Channelling Mythbusters

          Thanks.

          A while back I managed to put the data transferred during the BBC Olympic coverage into floppy disc tonnage (32,900t)

          I was going to get a count of termites, but my VERY quick Googling only returned people asking how much a termite weighed but no answers.

          If you were to post that many termites first class, one termite per envelope, it would cost £285,714 in stamps

          1. Martin Budden Bronze badge

            Re: Channelling Mythbusters

            The stamps would weigh more than the termites, and you'd need three tonnes of envelopes!

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Channelling Mythbusters

        @Lockwood; Well, you need a lot of them because their little jaws aren't really adapted to chewing up computer equipment.

  10. dave 81
    Devil

    Been done.

    Just google Geekbeat iosafe, and its the first link.

    Still, suppose proof is in replication of the experiment....

    1. Ralph B

      Re: Been done.

      Replication is good, but improvement is better. I'm expecting The Reg to have been monitoring the CPU and disk temperatures via SNMP through the whole burning experience.

  11. MissingSecurity
    Flame

    I thinkwe need...

    White phosphous testing...because you never know!

  12. Dan 55 Silver badge

    But will it blend?

  13. tony2heads
    Mushroom

    Re: thermite

    No - better nuke from orbit - it's the only way to be sure!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: thermite

      I'm going to hazard a guess that the Reg's words are not yet backed with NUCLEAR WEAPONS. However, they do have a nascent space program, and perhaps testing this device against a 100km fall at Mach 22 would seem to be a reasonable next step...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: thermite

        Well we'll see if we can help on that because thermite is for wimps.

        Here in the gunslinging US of A, there's such a thing as a third class Federal firearms License, usually referred to as a "C&R", for curios and relics.

        According to BATF (Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms - gee that sounds like fun), anything over 50 years old isn't a weapon any more, and if you have the C&R, you can buy and own it without further restrictions. (You just can't make a business of selling it/them for profit.)

        Well, a B-29 is over 50 years old, and all you need (other than the B-29) is a multi-engine rating on your pilot's license. A Fat Man or Little Boy atomic bomb is also over 50 years old, so you put the two together and now you can LEGALLY have your very own nuclear deterrent.

        OK, the Commemorative Air Force (out of Texas, where else?) has a flyable civilian B-29. The USAF managed to lose a nuclear weapon in the swamps north of Savannah, GA some years ago, and it is still there (fell out of a B-47). I'm thinking I'll put new batteries into my Radio Shack metal detector, put gas into my boat, and go looking.

        I'll let you know how I do, so when you want to do a REAL test on some random chunk of computer tat, we'll be all set.

        P.S. - the C&R license costs $30 for three years and you can sign your name in red crayon as "X". No photo ID required . . .

        Strangelove here, over and out!

        1. JCitizen
          Megaphone

          Re: thermite

          Addendum: A C&R is a nice thing to have, but your are wrong on all NFA weapons; you still have to be fingerprinted and photo ID'd, and pay the 200 tax if it meets the criteria, and some qualify as an AOW as well, where there is at least a $5 transfer tax as well. The only advantage the C&R license gives you on NFA weapons, is that you don't need an FFL and Class 3 license to take transfer possession of the weapon inside your home state, but interstate transfers can muddy up the process further. The GCA of 1986 clamped down on things even further.

  14. ausnerd
    Joke

    Roasted Canadians...

    Hmmm, tasty.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is case made of Fawkesproof fencing?

    If you'd waited a few days, you could have tied this review in to Guy Fawkes Night as a bonfire special.

    As today is Hallowe'en, you also missed the opportunity to test Enchanted Technologies' "Satanic Curse Proof" External HDD and Sandwich Maker. More details of this amazing product can be found here:-

    http://tinyurl.com/n8hurcf

  16. Marketing Hack Silver badge
    Flame

    Eh, not as satisfying as the destruction of the printer in "Office Space"

    Unless you played gangster rap while roasting the NAS.

  17. Stoneshop Silver badge
    Flame

    SPB

    Special Pyromaniacs Bureau

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    REID...

    Is this for testing a Trusty Armoured Raid Assembly?

  19. starkthewolf

    Yes but was the NAS RoHS?

    Then all the freaking solder connections were/are melted. Toasted wieners a special extra. I also noticed the guy wearing the fire protection gear was NOT the guy who put out the flames. Tough labor union up there in Canada?

    1. prodiG

      Re: Yes but was the NAS RoHS?

      Danny is our odd-jobs guy. In one of his odd jobs over the years he managed to acquire some legitimate fireman protective gear.

      I on the other hand had never operated a fire extinguisher before, and it seemed like a perfectly good opportunity to see what all the fuss was about. Being a systems administrator and gaming nerd, I have not had such opportunity to put out a fire using an extinguisher or acquire anything in the form of protective gear.

      I have been informed that I am indeed NOT DOIN IT RITE and ate some of that extinguisher powder. FYI, it tastes terrible and you should stand farther back than I did :P

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