back to article Man sues Apple for allowing him to become addicted to porn

A self-confessed porn addict is sueing Apple after he claims he became so hooked on watching rude videos that his wife left him. Tennessee man Chris Sevier, 36, has filed a 50-page complaint with the state's supreme court in which he slams the fruity firm for failing to install a blue movie filter on new devices. He wants …

COMMENTS

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  1. MrJai

    Did I create an account just to call this guy a bellend of the highest order?

    Yes I did.

    1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: Did I create an account just to call this guy a bellend of the highest order?

      Rest assured, there are worse reasons for joining ;-)

      Welcome aboard

    2. SuperTim
      Thumb Up

      Re: Did I create an account just to call this guy a bellend of the highest order?

      I see you have quickly adopted the general tone of comments for stories like this. You may wish to put the word "Bellend" on a keyboard shortcut for future commenting.

    3. Anonymous C0ward

      Re: Did I create an account just to call this guy a bellend of the highest order?

      One of us! One of us!

    4. davidp231
      Coffee/keyboard

      Re: Did I create an account just to call this guy a bellend of the highest order?

      Icon says it all...

    5. The_Regulator

      I think the bell end was his major problem. Perhaps we should also sue our OEM PC vendors for not providing a shortcut entitled bellend on the keyboard, I for one could use this with alarming frequency when responding to corporate emails.

      1. Stoneshop Silver badge
        Holmes

        Perhaps we should also sue our OEM PC vendors for not providing a shortcut entitled bellend on the keyboard

        "End" is already there as a key, "Bell" is Ctrl-G, so that's two keystrokes (of which one chord) instead of six.

    6. DAN*tastik
      Thumb Up

      Re: Did I create an account just to call this guy a bellend of the highest order?

      I'd upvote you, but you have 69 thumbs up and I don't want to be the one spoiling that.

    7. Chika
      Thumb Up

      Re: Did I create an account just to call this guy a bellend of the highest order?

      Welcome to the herd! ;)

    8. Lord Elpuss Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: Did I create an account just to call this guy a bellend of the highest order?

      Welcome friend, you shall fit in well.

    9. LinkOfHyrule
      Thumb Up

      Re: Did I create an account just to call this guy a bellend of the highest order?

      Can I just say - 120 upvotes - an impressive opening round there! I think that is scientific enough to undoubtedly say that porn bloke is indeed an high order bellend!

  2. Gordon Pryra

    Does this excuse still work?

    has this excuse not been done to death?

    It was not my fault its the (insert anything you want here)

    This is the sort of thing you would expect on Jeramy Kyle from the inbreed retards their actors portray so successfully (at least I hope some are actors or we have living proof on what happens when Darwin's theory's are broken by modern medicine)

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Does this excuse still work?

      "at least I hope some are actors "

      Afraid not. These are our peers. Apparently!

    2. Code Monkey
      Gimp

      Re: Does this excuse still work?

      "It was not my fault its the (insert anything WEALTHY here)"

      FTFY

    3. Havin_it
      Joke

      @Gordon Re: Does this excuse still work?

      >It was not my fault its the (insert anything you want here)

      Were those brackets meant to be quotation marks?

      1. Gordon Pryra

        Re: @Gordon Does this excuse still work?

        @Havin_it

        Yes :(

  3. EddieD
    Joke

    No chance.

    It won't stand up in court.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: No chance.

      That's what the viagra is for... oh wait.

    2. Bub

      Re: No chance.

      He should put it in the hands of his solicitor then.

  4. envmod

    Epiphany

    I was genuinely unaware that my penchant for staging the six inch olypics on a regular basis, was entirely beyond my control. Far from blaming Apple et al, I actually would like to go further back and blame Paul Raymond for not explicitely informing me that the contents of his special interest magazines in the 80s could potentially cause arousal.

    In fact there was a girl on the tube this morning who was looking pretty hot and wearing quite a short skirt. She was probably hotter than my wife if I'm honest.

    Think I'll sue her as well.

    1. NogginTheNog
      Coat

      Re: Epiphany

      "In fact there was a girl on the tube this morning who was looking pretty hot and wearing quite a short skirt. She was probably hotter than my wife if I'm honest."

      Pics or it didn't happen!

    2. Dazed and Confused Silver badge

      Re: Epiphany

      > In fact there was a girl on the tube this morning who was looking pretty hot and wearing quite a short skirt. She was probably hotter than my wife if I'm honest.

      > Think I'll sue her as well.

      I think the legal cost would outweigh your dry cleaning bill.

    3. the spectacularly refined chap

      Re: Epiphany

      In fact there was a girl on the tube this morning who was looking pretty hot and wearing quite a short skirt. She was probably hotter than my wife if I'm honest.

      I can understand that. I recall the amount of News 24 I watched went up quite sharply when Joanna Gosling went through her strawberry blonde phase 10-15 years back. Never been the same since she went back to shorter and ordinary blonde hair.

      1. Steven Raith
        Joke

        Re: Epiphany

        My first thought on reading that was blimey, has News 24 been around that long?

        My second thought was "I wonder if I google Joanna Gosling Redhead', will I get good results?".

        Add me to the lawsuit.

        Steven R

    4. Moosealot
      Joke

      Re: Epiphany

      It was pretty warm on the tube. Unless your wife was also on a tube (proper tube, not one of the pansy air-conditioned S-stock) then I suspect the girl you mention was hotter than her.

  5. Paul Dx
    Facepalm

    Chancer

    Yeah sure, U / A and K / E are so close together on the keyboard

    1. EddieD

      Re: Chancer

      I think he's holding it wrong

    2. Velv Silver badge
      Childcatcher

      Re: Chancer

      Although A / E and U / K are potentially not too far from each other.

      And I know from my own experiences I often get the order of letters wrong when the fingers are in full flow (although I don't remember having been that fortunate in my misspellings, I usually jet get wiggly red lines).

      But the case is billshut

    3. James 139

      Re: Chancer

      Depends, if it was an iOS device, maybe it corrected or predicted his typing based on previous use of the F word.

    4. xyz
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Chancer

      ...surely you mean tosser (and you don't even have to put allegedly after it) Paris obviously. I can just see him on lastMinute...Paris, one night.

    5. Eddy Ito Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Chancer

      Perhaps he uses a Dvorak keyboard because he finds it easier when his other hand is occupied. But he's probably a hunt and pecker anyway.

  6. Moktu

    So, the man's a lawyer, therefore he's a natural wanker...

    What's the problem?

    1. Rampant Spaniel

      I'm sure sueing Apple and getting so much publicity won't impact his chances of finding love in the future ;-) Isn't this termed 'doing a mosley'.

    2. davidp231

      "

      "So, the man's a lawyer, therefore he's a natural wanker..."

      There's a difference?

      1. Chika
        Pint

        "So, the man's a lawyer, therefore he's a natural wanker..."

        There's a difference?

        Having never seen or heard of an unnatural wanker, I wouldn't like to say!

  7. wowfood

    I concur

    This smut must be banned from all devices everywhere. In fact, why is he stopping his lawsuit at apple? Apple block porn where they can from the app store, the only way he found it was through the internet, a product which doesn't belong to apple. He should be suing the makers of the internet, or perhaps his ISP for allowing him access.

    And waht about suing facebook? It was their url he was searching for at the time, so it must be part their fault, although how he could have put u rather than a, and k rather than e when they're on different sides of the keyboard to one another is beyond me, he still has a legal case dammit.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I concur

      It does sound a bit strange.

      It's like someone suing the highways agency for building roads that they use to go buy crack.

    2. proto-robbie
      Pirate

      Re: I concur

      I googled for salacious titillation and arrived at vexatious litigation. Could happen to anyone, clearly.

  8. Dave 126 Silver badge

    I bought a brick the other day. The good folk at the builder's merchants didn't warn me that dropping it on my foot would hurt, even though they must have known this.

    ***

    Hell, I wear prescription glasses- I wouldn't sue my optician for enabling me to see things that aren't good for me.

    1. lglethal Silver badge
      Trollface

      Of course you wouldnt sue your optometrist...

      ... but then again you're not a lawyer...

    2. Chika

      Ever heard of Wonko the Sane? Douglas Adams must have seen this coming!

      Er... maybe I should rephrase that! *^^*

  9. Rabbit80

    Porn addict?

    Sounds like a bit of a tosser to me!

  10. Don Jefe

    Prevention

    Apple Inc. has installed a two level protection system that has been shown to prevent porn addiction. Our innovations include hardware tools standard on all Apple computers:

    - A 'Mouse' which allows the user to select what media can be viewed.

    - A 'keyboard' which allows the user to direct their browser to any of the hundreds of millions of websites that do not contain adult material.

    Apple Inc.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      @Don

      Not good enough. The poor guy was obviously using one hand for private negotiations which leaves him kinda incapacitated when it comes to mouse or keyboard usage ;)

  11. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Somebody

    Really, really, really, needs to get a life.

    I thought the US ethos was all about citizens taking responsibility (not a bad thing) and small government (the jury is out on that one). This person seems to think responsibility ends when there is a rich company you might fleece. I am not a fan of Apple or its products, but in this case I have no choice but to side with Apple.

    1. Armando 123

      Re: Somebody

      The ethos of America is personal responsibility. However, that does not mean that it is the ethos of the American *government*.

      1. heyrick Silver badge

        Re: Somebody

        "The ethos of America is personal responsibility." - really? Isn't that "personal responsibility" defined as "it's your fault"?

    2. Crazy Operations Guy
      Big Brother

      Re: Somebody

      That all depend on who you are listening to. The Republican party is all about personal responsibility and small government; on the other hand the Democrats are all for the government to protect the people and for a larger government.

      Of course this is in theory, in practice its just a colossal cluster-fuck of yelling and mud-slinging.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is there no such thing as self-control and personal responsibility any more?

    Or do we really want Apple, Google and Microsoft dictating what we can do with technology?

  13. adnim Silver badge
    WTF?

    The guy needs help

    not from a lawyer, from a psychiatrist. And not for his porn addiction.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Why stop there? add the carrier for not filtering, the studio for filming it and the actresses/actors for doing the deed in the first place.

    1. smudge Silver badge
      Paris Hilton

      ...and the NSA

      For not helping him although they must have known.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Joke

      and Kodak for...

      Making the film.... oh sorry, I forgot.

    3. Kubla Cant Silver badge

      And...

      DARPA for inventing the internet

      Sir Tim Berners-Lee for inventing the web

      Alan Turing for inventing the Turing machine (and David Hilbert for encouraging him)

      Eadward Muybridge for inventing the zoopraxiscope (and for making up a stupid name for himself)

      Charles Babbage for inventing the computer

      1. Rukario
        Angel

        Re: And...

        And his wife for leaving him the videos in the first place. (Or am I the only one who read the first sentence that way?)

      2. Crazy Operations Guy

        Re: And...

        Why not sue the first humans that copulated? Or the first micro-organism for possessing the desire to reproduce. Why not go back and sue the Big Bang for making the universe exist.

    4. Nuke

      @ Chris N

      Wrote :- "Why stop there? add the carrier for not filtering, the studio for filming it and the actresses/actors for doing the deed in the first place."

      Yes, but his reasoning is that Apple has the most money. For the same reason I am surprised he does not sue Warren Buffett and the Queen for not warning him too.

  15. Captain Hogwash Silver badge
    Alert

    Don't....

    ...let Claire Perry see this.

  16. Andrew Jones 2

    Owning an Apple device is like owning a gun,

    Owning an Apple device is like smoking a cigarette.

    These are things he claims in his lawsuit.

    The most disturbing part - he will probably win......

    1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
      Joke

      But I thought

      Owning a gun was legal in his neck of the wood

  17. Crisp Silver badge

    He has to be trolling.

    I refuse to believe that any reasonable person expects the manufacturer of a bit of software to be responsible for doing exactly what they told it to do!

  18. jai

    There ought to be a law...

    Surely this constitutes a complete waste of the court's time?

    And also, for that matter, a waste of my (and your) time in having read, and now commented on, this article. Can I sue him because his money-grabbing antics have caused a drop in my productivity this afternoon?

    1. silent_count

      Re: There ought to be a law...

      There are laws against ramptly stupid lawsuits. Though I'd imagine that if either of us were in charge, it'd be enforced far morr vigorously.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frivolous_lawsuit

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Fuckbook

    Is not a porn site. It's one of those hook up with women to have an affair sites and you need to register to view anything. So he clearly decided to have an affair, visited the site and entered his email, cc details, etc on purpose. It is not possible all this happened by accident or was anyone's fault except his own. No wonder his wife left him.

    I hope Apple take him to the cleaners for hundreds of thousands in costs.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Fuckbook

      Now I'm wondering if you've been on fuckbook before, if you're at home today, or if you looked it up at work. If it's the third option you are a braver man than I.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Fuckbook

        "Now I'm wondering if you've been on fuckbook before, if you're at home today, or if you looked it up at work. If it's the third option you are a braver man than I."

        Let's see, visit a website geared towards cheating at home or at work. Hmm, at work you could be fired, publicly humiliated, lose your standing in the community and be subject to ridicule. Or check the site out at home... where your wife could find out.

        Work is the obvious winner in that scenario!

  20. ShadowedOne

    On the off-chance that this kind of stupidity is genetic, I sincerely hope this moron has not reproduced.

  21. Richard Wharram

    Publicity-seeking law-troll.

    And it appears to have worked.

  22. Anonymous Coward 15
    Paris Hilton

    You're holding it wrong.

    (etc.)

    1. Chika

      Re: You're holding it wrong.

      What, the Apple?

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sue happy

    Ugh, another prime example of how sue happy we are over here. I still get sad when I see a cup of coffee with a "really hot" warning on it. Or a hammer that says "don't hit yourself with this" and all of the other stupid warning labels caused by lawsuits.

    Which reminds me, I might sue The Register, yeah, its impacting my job performance. I'm pretty sure its their fault I'm even posting a comment. Yeah, reg, you owe me. Right after I sue YouTube for cat videos, I'm coming after you!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Sue happy - There's a "documentary" about this...

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MeXQBHLIPcw

    2. proto-robbie
      Holmes

      Re: Sue happy

      I'm sorry to have to inform you that you have just wasted some of my time too.

  24. BornToWin

    Only in America...

    The paid liars will try anything to get some of Apple's billions of cash stash.

    1. The_Regulator

      They would borrow the money and issue dividends to avoid any tax liability should they actually have to pay anything which seems highly unlikely....

  25. Flocke Kroes Silver badge

    In the other corner

    http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Smut-lyrics-Tom-Lehrer/6AF3E9A2451F2F0548256A7D0025920C

    1. Christoph Silver badge
  26. Uncle Siggy

    Clearly this is Apple's fault

    Apple's cock up, Sevier's arse.

  27. DJ 2
    Holmes

    Avenue Q

    The Internet is really really great! (for porn)

    I got a fast connection so I don't have to wait (for porn)

    There's always some new site (for porn)

    I browse all day and night (for porn)

    It's like i'm surfing at the speed of light (for porn)

    the internet is for porn

    the internet is for porn

    why you think the net was born? *

    for porn.

    porn,

    porn.

    * cleanish version of the lyrics.

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    He's in luck though...

    On behalf of writing a good comment I took it upon myself to look into these fuckbook sites (not because I was wondering what the guys definition of pr0n is of course [cough, cough]) and I think he's in luck!

    I found 2. The .com variant advertises to have a dating bureau. So if the guy prefers these digi-chicks over his wife then what's stopping him from re-marrying and f*ck happily ever after?

    The .net variant even guarantees that you'll get laid. How's that for a sweet deal?

    Yeah, I'm completely convinced it was the innernets fault. Of course it wasn't his fault for not listening to his wife when she told him to cut out the crap. Or when she told him: "Either the pr0n goes, or I'm going".

    Yeah, the innernets fault. Not his possibly overly protective childhood or living style which eventually rendered him completely vulnerable to stuff which the rest of the world would call casual n00dies...

  29. dorsetknob
    WTF?

    "" Only in The land of the they think they are free and the I'M Brave behind my Drone""

    Guy is Probably looking for an out of court settlement of free porn

  30. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Can this be done as an open letter???

    Dear ISP,

    I have lost hours of productivity because of the wicked internet and it's vile filth mongering. I earn at least $40 ph and have calculated that you owe me a begillion doller$.

    This takes into account the times I have missed Desperate Housewives on television, blisters, shaving hairy palms. As well as the numerous sick days I had undertaken at work.

    Whilst I consider myself to be a mature adult, I find this whole thing absurd, I mean 2 girls one cup WTF, I had to watch it 1 hundred times just to be sure.

    Sincerely

    Perverts everywhere

  31. Da Weezil

    "but according to records (PDF) from the Tennessee Board of Professional Responsibility, he cannot currently practise law due to disability. "

    After reading this I can only conclude that it is a mental disability he suffers. If the American legal system permits this kind of stupidity then it is truly broken

    This cannot succeed surely?

    1. TeeCee Gold badge
      Meh

      He's obviously suffering from a very severe case of Shysterius Fuckwittus.

    2. Sir Sham Cad

      >"but according to records (PDF) from the Tennessee Board of Professional Responsibility, he cannot >currently practise law due to disability. "

      I would suggest he is unable to practise law because he thinks a suit like this has any chance whatsoever of not being thrown out with prejucide as soon as a judge stops laughing long enough to speak.

      Of course this gentleman obviously has mental health issues and, doubtless, a longer term underlying problem which should be quite sad in itself.

      But it's a bloke blaming Apple for his overly enthusiastic wanking habit so it's actually fucking hilarious!

    3. Kubla Cant Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      He cannot currently practise law due to disability

      RSI.

      There's an icon for that.

    4. Crazy Operations Guy

      A man who represents himself has a fool for a lawyer.

    5. Euchrid

      @ Da Weezil

      "After reading this I can only conclude that it is a mental disability he suffers."

      That's indeed the case - see http://abovethelaw.com/2013/07/lawyer-apple-should-protect-me-from-my-porn-addiction/

      The link, btw, is the first site to have reported on this story - it mentions legal trouble that the guy is facing and also another lawsuit against Apple... worth a read.

  32. Sharcman

    Dumbass

    What an idiot, he messes up his whole life and decides to blame someone else for it. Although I hate Apple, I want them to win coz it would mean a new level of censorships and parental locks across the board if the idiot has his way.

  33. 20legend

    What a wanker...

  34. Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

    Why Sue Apple?

    Is there some feature specific to Apple that causes porn addictions? Or inadvertent exposure to porn? So why is Apple being sued for something accessible on any off-brand laptop/PC?

  35. Armando 123

    The real problem

    ... is that in the USA, people can sue without threat of consequence. If a judge/jury had a way of saying "No, you're an idiot and this lawsuit is ridiculous because it's your own fault" and Apple had a way to countersue to get damages because the judge/jury said "No, you're an idiot and this lawsuit is ridiculous because it's your own fault", then these sorts of things would stop, or really slow down. However, that would mean less work for lawyers, and America has a legal system of the lawyer, by the lawyer, for the lawyer. The lawyers won't let there be less work for the ABA members.

    Once we have personal responsibility in the law, or rather punishment for refusing to admit one's own lack thereof, then we can move on to the civil service. So once again, that ain't happening.

    1. Crazy Operations Guy

      Re: The real problem

      In the case of Civil Lawsuits, the judge will almost always force the losing party to pay the costs of the trial (Unfortunately this only includes the lawyers' expenses and not the cost to the government)

    2. Chika

      Re: The real problem

      But here's where shows like Judge Judy, The People's Court and so on could come into play. If the judge in this case threatened the plaintiff with national televised coverage, I wonder how long it would be before the case was dropped?

      Just a thunk...

  36. Rampant Spaniel

    Why does it always seem to be lawyers who start these insane suits. This is just further proof that ambulance chasing vampires need the chickenwire treatment.

    I have the highest respect for the Constitution of the United States, but it sorely lacks some amendedments pertaining to our responsibilities. Any sane legal system would throw this out and sue him for wasting the courts time. If ever there were an example of malicious and baseless litigation this is it. Is a car company responsible for you speeding or getting a parking ticket? Send him off to a Chinese reeducation camp.

    1. Don Jefe

      Because most lawyers don't make jack shit for money and want to get in on the big cases the few get. I have to give this guy credit for at least targeting a gigantic global powerhouse with scads of money instead of screwing some mom and pop shop out of business for some trivial thing.

  37. Lamont Cranston
    Pint

    I bought a pint glass.

    NO ONE WARNED ME THAT I COULD PUT BEER IN IT. Oh, woe is me.

  38. The Nameless Mist

    Disturbed

    I am disturbed at the courts for allowing this claim to be allowed.

    I am even more disturbed that the litigant thinks he can get away with blaming a 3rd party manufacturer of a bit of hardware/operating system for his porn habit.

    Oh I've got a large magazine fully of nuddy pictures.. i can't stop myself .. I must sue National Geographic.

    .. yeah .. doesn't quite work when you put it in context does it?

    1. Rol Silver badge

      Re: Disturbed

      I'm gonna sue my local supermarket for making me fat, my local pub for making me a drunk and my government for making me depressed.

      After that I'm gonna sue the court for allowing me to make a total cock of myself.

  39. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'm Suing the Reg !

    For turning me into a commentard.

    1. Chika
      Happy

      I'm sueing you! (Re: I'm Suing the Reg !)

      ...for making me a replytard!

  40. TimePilot84

    You know who blames other people for their own misgivings? Psychopaths.

    1. Pookietoo

      re: misgivings

      ITYM shortcomings - and I should probably make a joke of that ...

  41. John H Woods Silver badge

    There need to be 3 possible verdicts for a civil suit

    Plaintiff wins, gets costs & possibly some damages

    Plaintiff loses, pays own costs, may have to pay other sides costs, but not necessarily.

    Plaintiff judged such a fuckwit that they have to pay other side's costs + massive fine for wasting courts time.

    We have the same problem here (in a less extreme form) where no-win, no-fee suits against public organisations such as the NHS are effectively risk free, and where the costs of settling are less than the costs of going to court the organisations just swallow the bill. Which means the taxpayers do.

  42. Rol Silver badge

    Aftr readig the aticle, I dcided to d o so me reserch an d wh ile I a m stll in the mi ddle of it, I th ouht I'd metion wh at I have discove red.

    It mkes typig very dificult!

    1. Anonymous C0ward

      Perfect for the one-handed typist

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Microwriter

      1. Rol Silver badge

        Re: Perfect for the one-handed typist

        Perfect, my typing skills, using just one hand and half an eye are almo...whoooaa wobbly bits, hairy no tails, arrgghh, fnah fnah, kipperbang urrrghhh....yes it works perfectly.

        Yes, on a scale of one to five I'd give it five fingers up...oh God, my experiment is out of control, I'm jizzed for the rest of my sordid life, arrrgh, bottoms, lipstick round the nipples, great googly booglies.

        Where's my lawyer?

  43. Joe User

    In other news...

    He's also suing silverware manufacturers for making him fat.

  44. mIRCat
    FAIL

    It's a common mistake.

    " Worst of all, the filing reads, none of the shiny happy fanbois and fangurlz at the Apple store warned him what arousing evils were lurking out there on the internet."

    It's because they made the mistake, which most people would prior to speaking with him, of assuming he had any common sense. Clearly everyone knows that the internets only true purpose is for porn; they even have informational videos using clever lyrics to tell us what the internets is for.

    Sadly Apple isn't to blame, but apparently neither is Chris.

  45. davidp231

    Dear El Reg...

    Please can we have Playmobil reconstruction of the trial when they laugh him out of the courtroom?

  46. Cameron Colley

    It does beg the question though:

    If Apple think porn isn't a bad thing then why is it banned form its "app store" (R) TM?

    Don't get me wrong, the guy's a duche but Apple's store policy surely means they "know there is something wrong with porn"?

  47. Mr Young
    Coffee/keyboard

    Number 23 is a cracker!

    "APPLE IS HIJACKING GREAT SEX BY FAILING To SELL ITS DEVICE IN SAFE MODE"?

    WTF - surely I could still manage a good fuck while holding a phone at the same time?

  48. bjr

    People who file frivolous lawsuits should be severely disciplined

    There need to be penalties for filing frivolous lawsuits. I think this guy should be bound, gagged and flogged with a riding crop.

  49. Anigel

    Guess it can't affect his life that badly if he has had time to write and file a 50 page complaint. I suggest he should also include his ISP as the apple device without any internet connection would not have had any porn to play.

  50. Herby Silver badge

    I suppose he might Sue The Sun...

    ...over the Page Three Girls.

    Putting it in a UK context (all the way from California!).

  51. RAMChYLD

    Why not blame his wife instead?

    If she hadn't left him he wouldn't have come down to this.

  52. Rattus Rattus

    Personal fucking responsibility

    It is apparently a trait being bred out of the species.

  53. SXB

    As tax payers we should sue his parents for teaching him the wrong thing - blame others for his problems and waste tax money for the court. His schools should be sued too.

  54. Rambler

    sadly, too old to remember who it was that corrupted me - but it was definately a she, not a what or a thing, I think ................. so will be unable to sue anyone :o(

    maybe THAT is something to sue for .......... if I could just remember what :o)

    mutters to self in corner

  55. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    He bought an iDevice unaware it would turn him into a complete wanker? Had he not met anyone else with one?

  56. Ed_UK

    Moral: Shouldn't Have Splashed Out on an IPhone

    It's an old joke, but it might still work.

  57. Putonghua73

    GTA

    "That's the great thing about this country. You can sue anyone for pretty much anything. And you'll probably win. Or at least get a settlement".

    1. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

      Re: GTA

      I suspect he will find that Apple decide to field some rather expensive lawyers (working directly for Apple, and not a law firm), and he will end up losing and paying costs to them. Apple's execs must be laughing all the way to the bank.

  58. Marvinoski
    Mushroom

    Apple License agreement

    read the contract before you buy

    5 C. You understand that by using any of the Services, you may encounter content that may be

    deemed offensive, indecent, or objectionable, which content may or may not be identified as

    having explicit language, and that the results of any search or entering of a particular URL may

    automatically and unintentionally generate links or references to objectionable material.

    Nevertheless, you agree to use the Services at your sole risk and that Apple shall have no

    liability to you for content that may be found to be offensive, indecent, or objectionable

    found this for the license agreement 5 c iphone/ipad& the Mac OS x

    6 c for safari for mac

    case closed

  59. Stevie Silver badge

    Bah!

    Thank Azathoth this poor man never once set foot in a newspaper and magazine shop. The consequences could have been publicly humiliating as well as divorce fodder.

  60. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    For heaven's sake

    Get a hold of yourself man!

    Oh wait......

  61. Richard Joseph
    Devil

    Matthew 18:9 "And if thine eye causeth thee to stumble, pluck it out, and cast it from thee"...

    Now, I know that Apple corps may seem to be omni-present of late, but if we're really going to lay blame and go back to the "original sin", don't you think the guy who first came up with the Apple idea (no, not Steve) should have the blame for this guy's downfall placed firmly at his feet? I mean, who else gave him the hands, eyes and appendages which made him capable of committing these self-debasing acts?

    Hey, you can get rid of you're iPad, but hey, you'll still have your hands etc. You KNOW what to do, homeboy, SNIP....

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