back to article Facebook Home gets SMACKDOWN from irate users

Facebook's app that takes over mobile phones has been met with a flurry of negative reviews, as people complain at just how much Facebook Zuck & Co. have put into their phones. The "Facebook Home" app became available to download on select Android devices on Friday, and at the time of writing had a rating of 2.4, with almost …

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  1. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

    I wonder...

    ...what they were expecting?

    1. LarsG
      Meh

      Live in purgatory.......

      God no,

      A home screen that rolls inane, uninteresting, insignificant and boring updates from uninteresting boring insignificant self important peoples lives who live with this false belief that their egotistical self importantance is in anyway of interest to the rest of us.

      This is what happens if you are bad and go to hell when you die......

      Purgatory......

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        @ LarsG

        "uninteresting boring insignificant self important people"... given we're talking about what you're seeing on your news feed, are you referring to you and your friends then?

        Remember, you can be friends with whoever you choose, if you choose those people, then more fool you.

        1. Mephistro Silver badge
          Unhappy

          Re: @ LarsG (@ AC 08:32 GMT)

          "Remember, you can be friends with whoever you choose, if you choose those people, then more fool you."

          From what I've seen in friends and acquaintances FBs, even if you only befriend interesting people, Nobel prices and porn actresses , 99.99% of their updates end up being junk, leaving you in a big stream of crap with only the very occasional pearl. The culture of being always 'in touch' that is inherent to FB seems to suck human brains dry in a short time.

          My hope is that this 'always in touch' shit is only a temporary fashion.

          1. Thing

            Re: @ LarsG (@ AC 08:32 GMT)

            'Stop hitting yourself'

            Unless they know actual Nobel prize winners or porn actresses then what they are following are public feeds of public people. If you want interesting updates from real people:

            A) only befriend people in reality who you actually want to be friends with.

            B) only befriend people on Facebook who you are friends with in reality.

            Most people seem to instinctively grasp the former, but a lot of people (like you and your friends) seem to struggle with the later. I don't eat food I hate, I don't sit and watch TV I don't like, I don't read Barbara Cartland so why would I follow the feeds of 'uninteresting, boring, self-important people' on Facebook/twitter and then complain about the content of the channel which I have crafted for myself.

            Off to do something I want to do, and as far as possible, avoid doing things I don't.

            1. Mephistro Silver badge

              Re: @ LarsG (@ AC 08:32 GMT)(@ Thing)

              I think that you are -quite elegantly- sidestepping my point. And my point is that no matter how much talent a FB user has, the constant peer pressure to 'keep in touch' and send updates will, in the end, have most of said updates being inane junk.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        FAIL

        Re: Live in purgatory.......

        An App for 13 yo girls, but no-one else...

      3. Muscleguy Silver badge

        Re: Live in purgatory.......

        Ben Elton wrote a book about what life must be like for those people, except it was made compulsory for everybody. Be afraid, be very afraid.

      4. Metrognome

        @Lars: Live in purgatory.......

        Well, excuse the pedantry but apparently purgatory is a state granted only to those who die in grace. It is a temporary state but it cannot lead to hell.

        In a way it may be what graceful souls experience temporarily before uninstalling and hence going to non-FB heaven. But to me that looks like the very definition of hell.

      5. Stuart Castle

        Re: Live in purgatory.......

        This is what happens if you aren't selective with your choice if friends on facebook.

      6. Ian Johnston Silver badge
        Unhappy

        Re: Live in purgatory.......

        inane, uninteresting, insignificant and boring updates from uninteresting boring insignificant self important peoples lives who live with this false belief that their egotistical self importantance is in anyway of interest to the rest of us.

        Is Stephen Fry on Facebook as well, then?

      7. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Live in purgatory.......

        I don't suppose it would be any more inane than it would be on your PC. It doesn't sound as if Facebook would appeal to you on any platform.

        Right! Me neither!

    2. Katie Saucey
      Pint

      Re: I wonder...

      It's alright, he's from Barcelona!

    3. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge

      Re: I wonder...

      XKCD knows about star-rated reviews...

      http://xkcd.com/937/

      1. Dave 126 Silver badge

        Re: I wonder...

        I can't imagine it does one's battery life much good, either.

    4. moylan

      Re: I wonder...

      aren't the only people who can vote and comment on apps in the google play store g+ users? slightly biased perhaps?

      1. LosD

        Re: I wonder...

        You mean you can't be both?

        News to me.

        In fact, I thought most were not so much G+ users, as "has a Google account, but never uses G+"-people.

        1. reno79

          Re: I wonder...

          "In fact, I thought most were not so much G+ users, as "has a Google account, but never uses G+"-people."

          That certainly applies to pretty much every Android user in my office at least. I logged in once to see what it was like and left pretty swiftly.

      2. Tom 35 Silver badge

        Re: I wonder...

        No, people with google+ accounts, that they give you automatically.

        You don't have to be a google+ user, or have even looked at it once.

      3. jonathanb Silver badge

        Re: I wonder...

        Everyone with an android has a g+ account. Doesn't mean they use it as the Oompa Loompas intended.

        1. M Gale

          Re: Everyone with an Android has a G+ account

          No they don't, regardless of how much Google wants them to have one.

          Some people respond to the G+ requirement for ratings and reviews with "fine, fuck you, I won't give you my opinion. One less data point for you."

        2. Sporkinum

          Re: I wonder...

          Not true. I have a hacked Nook color running Cyanogenmod, and I don't have G+. I think you have to have G+ if you want to rate or comment on something through the play store though.

        3. Vector

          Re: I wonder...

          @jonathanb 1800GMT

          "Everyone with an android has a g+ account"

          Not true. I've been using Android handsets since the Moto Droid came out and do not have a G+ account. I've stopped reviewing apps because I refuse to join G+ just to voice my opinion. I find that a rather annoying attempt at cross-pollination on Google's part.

    5. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      They live in a bubble.

      They live in a Silicon Valley Bubble. Always harping on about the USER EXPERIENCE....

      But for the rest of us that translates into having our lives & souls sold to advertisers....

  2. Martin 71 Silver badge
    Joke

    FIFY

    "This is an experience for [Facejunk] access," he told us. "The phone is designed for people that want to be tools."

  3. Graham Marsden
    Devil

    All your smartphone...

    ... are belong to us...

    ... bitch!

  4. skeptical i

    If Fecebook users have their own phones now, does this mean other phones will be Fece-free?

    Please?

  5. Mitoo Bobsworth
    Meh

    Different form, same approach.

    The more things change, the more they stay the same.

  6. Winkypop Silver badge
    FAIL

    Is the new App compulsory?

    No.

    Is Facebook compulsory?

    No, not yet.

    Then what's the problem?

    1. danR2

      Re: Is the new App compulsory?

      There is no problem...yet.

      But when the ads start following your eyes around on the Samsung S4 next year.

      But don't worry, it will be so hypnotic it won't even bother you.

      You're getting sleepy. veerrryyy sleepy.

    2. DF118

      Re: Is the new App compulsory?

      As sure as night follows day, given a story like this there's always some smartarse commenter comes along to point out that [insert name of thing] isn't compulsory. Slow claps all round.

    3. lglethal Silver badge
      Thumb Down

      Re: Is the new App compulsory?

      Facebook use might not be compulsory, but it"s various apps are usually pre-installed on every phone you get these days (and normally can only be removed by rooting the phone!).

      The worry for all of us is that on the next phone you buy, this piece of cr-app might be pre-installed on the phone. Combine that with a waz to prevent people rooting their phones and what are you going to do?

      1. thesykes

        Re: Is the new App compulsory?

        The worry for all of us is that on the next phone you buy, this piece of cr-app might be pre-installed on the phone. Combine that with a waz to prevent people rooting their phones and what are you going to do?

        Easy... don't buy it. If manufacturers or operators see that Facebook-riddled phones don't sell, they won't stock any more.

      2. Dana W
        Happy

        Re: Is the new App compulsory?

        @lglethal Thank you for giving me another reason to add to my "why buy another iPhone" list. No Facebook unless you are fool enough to actually INSTALL it.

        1. lglethal Silver badge
          Meh

          Re: Is the new App compulsory?

          Hey Dana,

          Check the story that just appeared on the Reg. Facebook are in discussion with Apple about implementing some form of Facebook Home. So this may soon be affecting your iPhone soon enough...

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Perhaps they should have called it.

    InYourFACEbook

  8. Fihart

    Pretty much as expected.

    Their record shows that anything Facebook is going to be invasive. I don't condemn Facebook outright -- it's useful to me as an effortless way of keeping in contact with friends/family overseas. I can see that people much younger than me use it to organise their social lives -- particularly as this generation seems more group-oriented and less concerned about privacy. Where I differ is the cost -- I avoid using the mobile phone unnecessarily, let alone paying inflated data costs for something as marginal to me as Facebook. My teenage lifestyle may not have been quite so frantically mobile -- but we managed to organise ourselves even before we could afford a landline.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Pretty much as expected.

      Who pays (inflated data costs) per megabyte for data access in this day and age, unless you're roaming, granddad?

      Assuming you're UK based, virtually every tariff I can find comes with some kind of data allowance, 250MB per month at minimum, which would suffice for the bulk of light users.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Pretty much as expected.

        'merikans don't travel to foreign parts these days. They think that everyone on this planet is about to kill them all (or so their TV Propaganda would have them believe) so roaming charges are not really an issue.

        Data limits... that is a whole different ball-game. I'd fully expect this to blow many users limits easily and then it will hit them hard in the pocket.

        US phone plans are not much more than a joke when it comes to data limits unless you are willing to virtually sign your life away.

        15Gb for £15 (or thereabouts) a month is hard to beat. There are countries where it is beaten but compared to the US, it is an absolute bargain.

        anon because I spend half my time in the US. My Dual SIM phone is a godsend but the US bills are frankly astronomic when compared to the UK.

        1. Vector
          Childcatcher

          Re: Pretty much as expected.

          "15Gb for £15 (or thereabouts) a month is hard to beat. There are countries where it is beaten but compared to the US, it is an absolute bargain."

          Holy Carp! I had no idea the shaft was that big. 12Gb costs us poor 'merikans $120 or, effectively, 6.5 times as much.

          oy...

  9. This post has been deleted by a moderator

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: FB Phone

      Anyway the very concept of this FB phone is enough to make me shudder, but it's not aimed at me, it's aimed at the exact opposite of me

      Yes. People with friends.

      1. Ross K
        FAIL

        Re: FB Phone

        Anyway the very concept of this FB phone is enough to make me shudder, but it's not aimed at me, it's aimed at the exact opposite of me

        Yes. People with friends.

        Ha ha. You walked into that one Eadon...

        "EPIC EADON FAIL"

        1. Rukario
          Facepalm

          Re: FB Phone

          @Ross K

          Facebook is all about "friends", not friends.

          1. Ross K
            WTF?

            Re: FB Phone

            Facebook is all about "friends", not friends.

            Really? Thanks for the education.

          2. reno79

            Re: FB Phone

            You misspelled adverts and data-mining.

    2. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: FB Phone

      Ideally, one would be able to get the useful functionality of a Facebook-like service whilst retaining control through using an open-source peer-to-peer social network... I'm sure Eadon would approve, too.

      I wish Diaspora well, though I've only just read of the sad death of its co-founder in 2011.

    3. Arctic fox
      Trollface

      Funny Mr Eadon how you managed to work an anti-MS/Win8 angle into a story about.......

      ..........a FaceBook app on Android devices? I really think you should consider seeking help with your obsessions. Certainly the rest of us would be very grateful if you did.

      1. Montreal Sean

        Re: Funny Mr Eadon how you managed to work an anti-MS/Win8 angle into a story about.......

        In all fairness to Eadon, the letters m and s did both appear in the article...

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "Really, what did these people expect?"

    That pretty much sums it all up.

    It seems to be exactly what it was intended to be - something to attract die-hard facebook users, not something to attract the outcasts into the fold.

    The real test will be when sufficient numbers of the true targets get their hands on it. Then we'll see if Facebook have judged their users right.

    1. danR2

      Re: "Really, what did these people expect?"

      "true targets"

      They be the ad-peddlers. ka-ching!!

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Roll out usual down-with-Facebook comments

    Oh looky, Facebook story, and the predictable "Facejunk is rubbish, only has idiots on it, why would anyone want to stay in touch with their friends using it?!?!?!" comments.

    As usual, ignoring the fact the "idiots" on it are people YOU choose to be friends with.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Facepalm

      Re: Roll out usual down-with-Facebook comments

      That's because it's crap and makes Google's data mining look amateurish. I do find it amusing that you are hiding behind AC to defend Facebook, anonymity and Facebook are an oxymoron.

      You want to end up on pinkmeth then go ahead and use Facebook.

    2. Arctic fox

      Re: "Roll out usual down-with-Facebook comments". Well old chap I am an old fashioned....

      ........sort of guy and people I care about get e-mails, phone-calls and even something so impossibly old hat as a (yes I know, you can scarcely believe what you are reading here) hand written letter. In fact I even go as far as taking the radical step of actually spending time in their company (steady on now, you will scarcely believe this) face to face - I'll bet you are positively aghast to hear that, something so not this century.

  12. Jess

    It looked like a third liked it.

    Suppose that follows through, they only have to get 10% of android users to use it to be a bigger platform than Windows Phone.

  13. Bob Vistakin
    Holmes

    It's a great way to instantly identify assholes though.

    That's anyone using it beyond the 5 minute curiosity window. 100% reliable, too.

    1. Arctic fox
      Thumb Up

      "Re: It's a great way to instantly identify assholes though." Well Bob, it is not often that.......

      ...........we agree but on this occasion I have to say thumbs up. A very compact description of the sociological criteria for instantly identifying someone that one would instantly wish to avoid.

  14. Will Godfrey Silver badge

    What I find quite scary is the number of people who appear to think this is a good use for a phone and that facebook is a substitute for actually getting out and meeting real people.

  15. adnim Silver badge

    I must be old fashioned

    Friends are people I know, people I care about, people I trust, people I want to spend time with. Acquaintances are people I sort of know, people I care less for (I might not risk my life for them), people I might eventually trust, people I might have the odd pint with.

    What are Facebook "friends" ?

    1. Maharg
      Unhappy

      Re: I must be old fashioned

      An example of mine would be is true of a guy I have met twice in my life, once on a mutual friends stag do and the second time at the weeding of said friend, he posts things I actually want to read, and have chats with him about said things, he is a Facebook friend, although I’m pretty sure if I died tomorrow he wouldn’t notice.

      The opposite is true of one of my girlfriends close friends, who is one of those people who takes pictures of her dinner with instagram, and tags herself everywhere (ummmm #nice coffee (pictured) @Starbucks)

      Wow, I did not know you could get coffee at Starbucks, or in fact what coffee looks like, and it’s a good thing you have that vintage brown filter on, making the whole picture lack detail and add more brown, personally I think there was a lack of actual brown colour in said picture of brown coffee and brown wooden table with brown pastry with bits of brown chocolate in beside it.

      Unfortunately this person would notice if I stop ‘following’ them and it would actually affect my relationship with them in real life.

      1. TakeTheSkyRoad

        Re: I must be old fashioned

        Well there are settings for what shows in your feed so you can keep the annoying poster(s) as friends but stop their posts showing in your feed. Filtered to status updates, photos, comments etc... unfortunately shared/reposted crap isn't a specific category but it someone is resharing too much you won't see their status updates or whatever anyway so may as well filter them out completely !

        Here you go, I even googled it for you... http://en-gb.facebook.com/help/335291769884272/

        It's dead handy :)

        1. Maharg

          Re: I must be old fashioned

          True, but then I get asked about this crap as well

  16. Frankee Llonnygog

    Can you still make phone calls?

    I hope this is a very engrossing and involving experience for Facebook users. The upswing in associated accidents should work wonders for the gene pool.

  17. The Alpha Klutz
    Thumb Up

    its GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGREAT

    its like having a personal assistant, who's also a wold class stalker, in your pocket. you can just stalk people when you dont even want to. when you wake up in the morning. when youre on the train. when you take a sh$t....

    i think all of the creepy people should have this

    1. Rukario

      Re: its GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGREAT

      Friending Tony the Frosted Flakes / Frosties Tiger?

      1. BenDwire
        Headmaster

        Re: its GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGREAT

        No, Tony says "GRRRRREAT" .... Grr, as in growling. Geddit?

        I think he's actually friended Gareth Gates...

        1. Rukario
          Facepalm

          Re: its GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGREAT

          > No, Tony says "GRRRRREAT" .... Grr, as in growling. Geddit?

          I know but around here you never can tell.

          > I think he's actually friended Gareth Gates...

          <- That's even worse!

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    About what I expected

    Touchwiz is bad enough (compared to blonde haired, blue eyed Aryan Android) but at least it does some things well. Just because users might want advanced Facebook functions live on one of their own screens doesn't mean they also want to change how they make phone calls, send SMS messages and all the other smart things a smart phone does. Seriously, a much better widget would have sufficed.

    I hope Facebook Home is easy to get rid of and I do feel for the poor idiots who buy the HTC First.

    1. RonWheeler

      Re: About what I expected

      I'm quite looking forward to the HTC First as it will probably be quite cheap (as in subsidized) and the FB app can be uninstalled easily to revert to vanilla Android.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: About what I expected

        But will it - if its installed and marked as a system app then you can't remove it (The S3 has things like Dropbox and some odd crap Korean apps installed as system apps and you're stuck with them)

  19. Tony Paulazzo
    Happy

    For some, Facebook Home just packs too much Facebook into a phone.

    Brilliant!

  20. Haku

    Next up, the Twitterfone

    The perfect phone for the worlds narcissists - it runs 24/7 listening to your voice and automatically tweets every sentence you speak.

    I wonder if Google Glass will have such a feature...

  21. Cipher
    Go

    Ballmer's *Deep Mole*...

    ... has apparently done his/her Job!

    Each side is infiltrating the other and making sure that horrible GUIs are implemented...

  22. Eddy Ito Silver badge
    WTF?

    A little unclear

    "Dont need widgets.. but I would love to see folders in the future, and maybe custom short cuts on the lock screen."

    Ok so the new fullscreen Home widget that seems to run only FB sub-widgets is all this person wants, I get that. The whole concept of folders and short cuts on the lock screen thing strikes me as a bit off. Isn't that like saying they don't want a lock screen and just want to go straight to the original home screen? To top it off, if the new FB Home is the new lock screen aren't they just saying they want the old Android back but without a lock screen and with a Windows 95 style active desktop?

  23. Henry Wertz 1 Gold badge
    Devil

    Real friends on facebook do not help

    "If you want interesting updates from real people:

    A) only befriend people in reality who you actually want to be friends with.

    B) only befriend people on Facebook who you are friends with in reality."

    This doesn't help one bit. I don't use my facebook account for anything but single sign on (no facebook friends), but out of my friends that DO use facebook, I've SEEN their feeds. In person? Perfectly interesting people. On Facebook? It's like the worst sterotypes of how worthless facebook is, all rolled into one. Any little boring thought that pops into their head, updates on what they ate for lunch, what the weather was like, if the elevator took an extra moment to show up, and on and on. Just terrible. (Note to any friend that sees this -- I didn't mean you, I meant all my other friends, I suppose. Yeah.)

  24. facebook sucks balls!

    Hurray! Finally a crackbook App for our phones!

    You've got to be kidding me right? Only a moron would install this garbage on their phone! Its bad enough dealing with their screwed up, not to mention constantly hacked, network from our regular PC's, much less letting them spam our phones so we can't access anything. Facebook is failing and they are doing whatever they can to try and save themselves! Google+ is going to wipe them out and they know it.

  25. drunk.smile

    First 5 star review I decided to look into

    was by Florian Laplantif who turns out to be a software engineer from Facebook. I'm sure many of the 5 star reviews are from genuine independent users & I've just been unlucky, right?

  26. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is there anyone in this world that really doesn't have anything better in their lives?????

    Since Facebook became fairly mainstream it's been used as a way to keep in touch with friends and family. What's happened in reality is a lot of people add random people they used to be friends with in primary school, people they didn't like, half the workforce from every job they've ever had and now people that aren't true friends or family now represent the majority of a friends list on a Facebook account. For the benefit of this post I will assume that this is around 75% particularly in accounts which have over 200 friends! Lets think about this now, your friends you see fairly often, a few friends may have moved away so you might chat through FB to catch up once in a while, same goes with family this makes up about a quarter of your Facebook users, these people that are more important than anything else, who you see or talk to regularly because they matter and the people you would share things with that you wouldn't put on FB. I ask you this....... Why the hell would you wanna put this rubbish on your phone which puts all the other unimportant people in your life at the forefront of your phone? Making it harder for you to keep in touch with the real people that you want to phone and talk to that really matter!!!

  27. Ben Rosenthal

    Well more fool them if they failed to notice how terrible at Android Zuckers's mob are!

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    tools

    "This is a tool for [Facebook] access"

    This is Facebook access for a tool more like

  29. Maharg
    Stop

    The problem with facebook...

    I agree with the previous statement, I just hope this being involved in everything is a fad that will dry up soon, I can’t listen to the radio, watch TV or drink a coffee or on the loo (Are we a nation of folders or scrunchers? I’m taking a dump leave me alone!) without being told to get involved, or ‘like’ us, even Question Time has a pointless twitter angle that does nothing but waste time while David Dimbleby tries to comprehend what the words he has been told to say mean, when they are talking about a defence issue, I want to hear what the guy from the MOD has to say, not what Bob from Swindon thinks, I know Bob, he’s an arse.

    Facebook is going to swallow itself in advertisement and pointless crap until people get sick of it, give it 5 years and we will have a ‘facebook blocker’ along side pop-up blockers and spam filters.

    Then maybe, just maybe one day conversations will not be interrupted with ‘oh yeah I saw that on Facebook’…

    Rant over

  30. 6 inches long, handle.
    Devil

    Facebook Tool...

    "This is a tool for [Facebook] access," he told us

    Well what he actually meant was:

    "This is a tool for tools,"

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