Pyongyang Photoshop patent prank portrays wet People's Army.
North Korea's official press agency has been caught with its hands in the Photoshop copy-and-paste jar, in a hopelessly bodged attempt to big up the amphibious-landing capability of the country's hovercraft. A couple of days ago, the Korean Central News Agency (KCNA) released a snap showing operations by the KPA (Korean People …
The only reason I can think of as to why they would do this would be to give a false impression of their military strength.
Sure, they have the bomb and they may be crazy enough to use it. But photoshoping crap like this just reminds me of Iraq going into Gulf War I. And we now know what the situation actually was.
"The only reason I can think of as to why they would do this would be to give a false impression of their military strength."
They do it to give *their own people* a false impression of their might.
The frightening thing isn't their aggressive stance, nor their massive, massive military and spending. The frightening thing is that if it does come down to it, we'll essentially be slaughtering millions of poor bastards who totally don't deserve it and just happen to have been born as males in a bat-shit nation.
I do believe the words used were "Massive military", not "Massive military might".
Three million round-heads with horses and longbows would be a massive military. Wouldn't exactly last long against one person and a suitably stocked GAU-8 though.
Oh I'm sorry, was that your entire army? I didn't notice.
Cost of 2 new BAe aircraft carriers = £££££
Enough US super stealth ninja aircraft for half of them = £££££££
Military value of aircraft based ninja stealth air superiority dog fighters in war on terror = 27p
Cost of pirate download of photoshop = 0
Cost of blank DVD to burn it to = 27p
Military value of image in war on great whoever = 0
Did the nice chaps from NK sign up Top Gear to run their space programme after they saw the amazing ability of firing a Robin Reliant into err, almost space showed them that a tall, balding old bloke with no useful technical abilities, a procrastinating old guy with a desire to be a mans man and a short bloke with whitened teeth and dyed hair (allegedly) could launch a rocket further than NK can manage?
"On that note. How's our, and by that I mean the UK's, space programme coming along?"
If you mean rockets, it ended in the early 70's after successfully putting a satellite into orbit. At which point it was realised that reinventing the wheel was an expensive and somewhat pointless process since defence needs could be met by cheaply renting from the Americans and any hope for return on rocket R&D investment via commercial ventures was ablated by the need to rent launch sites from other nations on the other side of the planet.
If you mean the hi-tech profitable stuff such as advanced satellites and reusable space planes, then the answer is 'splendidly'.
About 50 000 to 100 000 to be exact'ish in the first 10 minutes as the norks guns make short work of Seoul and the surrounding area.
If the norks are stupid enough to use chemical/bio/nukes then the number of dead will reach into the millions and make WW2 look like a childrens tea party.
Bet then I bet the norks are being egged on by Apple... "go on.. take out the Samsung HQ... you know you want to"
A lot of people in fact. My father was involved last time in the 50s. A number of his shipmates didn't come back. A lot of NK soldiers, soldiers disguised as peasants and peasants he bombed and shot up didn't come back either (there being no difference between an oxcart carrying ammunition and an oxcart carrying rice from a few hundred feet up in the air).
However even though they lost none of the NK leaders were deposed and the people didn't rise up. I find it hard to look on it quite as flippantly as you do.
Rightyho, - do you see all those hovercraft?
You do, excellent, now can you see the identical hovercraft?
You can, excellent, now can see you they are totally identical?
Maybe you need to look at this "how to" - http://www.instructables.com/id/Clone-Yourself-Using-Adobe-Photoshop/
There a number of things to note. For instance, not all the hover craft have any wake. There are also some retouch halos that indicate someone was manipulating the appearance of the of the spray thrown up by the HCs. The there's the giant Wookie standing near the farther HC on the beach.
Shock horror - military equipment looks the same!! Does that mean the Red Arrows are faked using Photoshop, they look the same from that distance, and they all move as one often so the tricksters have a brush with nine planes on it and just wave that around.
I haven't pixel-peeked but the water around each of them does appear to be different, a couple of them have different superstructures and that assault isn't that large. Had there been 300 craft all with identical water spray coming off them that may have been a clue.
Not as likely to be identical, what with the wind and ocean spray and all. Could be one of those Neil Armstrong flags I guess.
To be honest though, if you zoom in on the one craft, I think photoshop cloning is the preferable answer to the alternative: that the front of the hovercraft really *is* dissolving into the ocean.
From what I hear they have more than enough of them to be able to set up that sort of shot.
I suspect that what we are seeing here is just a lazy PR man making the photo look a bit better - a PR man who is probably now doing an in depth investigation of re-education camps. As forgery goes its just too trivial. Cock up, not conspiracy.
Goodness knows I've done the same thing myself a few times, when none of the photos I've got look half decent for a web report I've been known to get a bitmap editor out and recreate the photo I'm sure I would have taken had I pressed the damn button at the right moment.
The problem is that we always assume equality. IE - people here may think that its obviously photoshopped and chopped and this erodes the propaganda. It does, but the audience of this garbage may not be nearly so well educated. They may well absorb it all as lore.
The question isn't really being answered by anyone. We know they are a stupid regime. Are we stupid enough to plan for them not_to smart things? I'm half expecting bad news any day anout NK doing something very very dumb. What then? Because history tends to show that appeasing such acts only leads to very much larger problems.
If they did attack okinawa - and wreck the Americans there, what then? More sabre rattling? Serious talks with the Chinese? Personally my own view here is its too late for friendly diplomacy. The chinese need to be told 'You sheltered and protected these nut jobs, - if they attack, you will be held accountable" and follow it with some nuke armed subs pointed in china's direction. And a back channel of 'they make one step and you are glass''.
They ( and most of the Chinese politicians ) have always had the same bad Elvis impersonator hair..
Predates photoshop..possibly that hair is what happens if you started in the 1950s, using Grecian 2000 at age 12 ?
I have this fantasy when ever I see large numbers of Chinese or NK politicos that they'll all begin running about and break into song like Sha Na Na :)
Check out the bbc news front page. They have a picture of some Nork brass stood behind their glorious smurf emperor. I kind of recognize the FFL style cap on two guys but whats with the other style of caps? Is that style unique to Norks? I think they are army (as opposed to navy \ airforce).
I think this is the link
I'm so looking forward to being labelled a "running dog capitalist imperialist" again, a phrase I miss from the 1950s and the first US/Korean war. I mean, I want to hear rants about re-education, the purity of proletarian revolution and that I'm just a tool of capitalist gain. Why is the American ruling circle busily expanding armament, disregarding the hardship and misery of the people? Is it because their only concern is war and war profits and not peace and peaceful construction?
Holy "Tow shong", Batman. Come back Mao, all is forgiven!
OBVIOUSLY faked! They shoulda hired the yanks who faked the moon landing - at least their fakery is harder to detect.
PS: I'm mildly amused by the notion of Adobe sending lawyers to Pyongyang and trying to prosecute the government for using an unlicensed copy of Photoshop. What could possibly go wrong?
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