back to article 'Build us a Death Star, President Obama' demand thousands

A petition asking the Whitehouse to construct a "Death Star", has gathered over 5000 signatures on the American government's ePetition site. The petition 'Secure resources and funding, and begin construction of a Death Star by 2016' was created by a John D of Longmont, Colorado, and has gathered 5,370 signatures in the 3 weeks …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's a joke

    They wouldn't go for it, would they?

    Would they???

    1. Voland's right hand Silver badge
      Devil

      Re: It's a joke

      It is a running gag: http://tshirtgroove.com/death-star-urban-regeneration-program-t-shirt/

      1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
        Holmes

        Re: It's a joke

        No it's not.

        Pseudo-Economic cranks like Krugman, regular columnist at the New York Times have actually argued that preparing for a "Space Invasion by Aliens" would create jobs and bring the US out the recession.

        Yep, no problem!

        1. RICHTO Silver badge
          Mushroom

          Re: It's a joke

          Well half of them still don't acknowledge the facts around global warming,and they consider Scientology a religeon so not the greatest of surprises.....

          1. cnapan
            Pint

            Re: It's a joke

            Scientology isn't a religion?

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: It's a joke

              No Scientogy is a Cult. See http://www.xenu.net/

          2. Comments are attributed to your handle
            FAIL

            Re: It's a joke

            What do you mean by "They consider Scientology a religion"? Surely, you don't believe that the majority of Americans recognize it as an actual religion. The opposite is true.

            By the way, nice job worming global warming into this conversation. You truly are a talented troll.

            1. RICHTO Silver badge
              Mushroom

              Re: It's a joke

              ? Its not like there is any doubt abut global warming anymore. In case you have have your head in the sand for a decade or 2 then there is now over whelming observable evidence that a) Global warming is happening, and b) the primary cause is greenhouse gas emissions caused by mankind.

              The only thing left to argue about is how bad it will be...

              The US government recognises Scientology as a religeon is what i refer to - and gives them the relevant tax exemptions.

              1. Comments are attributed to your handle
                FAIL

                Re: It's a joke

                Let's not attack strawmen, RICHTO, m-kay? If you read what I wrote (instead of drunk-skimming,) you'll see that the only observation I made about global warming was this: How the fuck could you possibly start a conversation about it in a thread regarding Death Stars?

                Last I checked, the IRS != the American people. Unless you honestly believe that ~315 million are in support of Scientology, then maybe you (along with most rational thinkers) can arrive at the correct conclusion that the IRS screwed up. Maybe they're fearful of what would happen if they revoked their tax exempt status.

                Now, please take your contrived arguments elsewhere.

          3. Dodgy Geezer Silver badge
            WTF?

            Re: It's a joke

            What? You mean that they believe it's still happening? In spite of all the official temperature figures showing that it's stopped?

            Well, they obviously don't believe in science....

            1. RICHTO Silver badge
              Mushroom

              Re: It's a joke

              That's a myth or a result of looking at a short term view from a specific starting point.

              Official temperature figures viewed across the long term trend all show that global warming continues...

        2. Jim Hill

          Re: It's a joke

          > Pseudo-Economic cranks like Krugman

          So, the Nobel prize committee for economics are fools, then. (<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Krugman#Nobel_Memorial_Prize_in_Economic_Sciences>)

          I never knew that before, I'm so glad there are people here with such a deep understanding..

          1. CmdrX3

            They could very possibly be...

            ...the committee that hands out the peace prize seem to have lost the plot on occasion in recent times.

          2. This post has been deleted by its author

          3. SysKoll

            Re: It's a joke

            im Hill writes:

            Jim Hill wrote:

            > So, the Nobel prize committee for economics are fools, then.

            Yes.

            Just because the Nobel committee picks some random leftist writer with delusions of grandeur doesn't make that writer a genius. Just like giving Obama the Nobel for peace didn't make him stop wars (or start them in the case of Lybia).

            You look like you need a religion with saints, icons and an infallible pope or two, yet you don't sound like Catholic material. May I interest you in scientology?

          4. JohnG Silver badge

            "...the Nobel prize committee for economics are fools..."

            Giving Obama a Nobel prize for peace, essentially because he wasn't George Bush really made the whole concept of Nobel prizes a bit of a joke. It would be even funnier if the big knobs of the EU were made to collect their recently awarded Nobel prize for peace in Athens.

        3. Johan Bastiaansen
          WTF?

          Re: It's a joke

          Hey, don't diss Krugman, he's an island of common sense in a sea of madness.

          1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
            Facepalm

            Re: It's a joke

            > Hey, don't diss Krugman, he's an island of common sense in a sea of madness.

            HöhöHöhöHöhö .... inflation too low for you?

        4. dssf

          Re: It's a joke... spend like there is NO tomorrow, then,

          The hostiles arrive and from 2.2 AU, blast the deathstar and render Earth a wasteland. Then, there literally would be no tomorrow, hehehehe. But, it could be a "party like it's 1999", lol...

          The only Prince will be an astonmical prince and the prints of darkness from deep space... :-)

    2. LarsG
      Meh

      Bonkers

      That's it, the US has finally shown the world they are a nation of hillbilly nutters, sadly also a nation that takes itself seriously.

      'Lets nuke the moon guys, it'll be fun!' And that wasn't a joke either.

      1. Sean O'Connor 1
        Facepalm

        Re: Bonkers

        > That's it, the US has finally shown the world they are a nation of hillbilly nutters

        Or maybe they've just shown us that they have a sense of humour and you don't?

        1. sisk Silver badge

          Re: Bonkers

          Or maybe they've just shown us that they have a sense of humour and you don't?

          That's more likely, but then this is the nation where a government agency had to issue a statement saying that mermaids don't actually exist we're talking about.

          Seriously though, we DO have a sense of humour here in America. Unfortunately we've also got people who take everything literally. This probably IS a serious petition that grew out of someone's joke about building a Death Star.

      2. Don Jefe
        Stop

        Re: Bonkers @ LarsG

        The U.S. gives the same rights to all nutters. It doesn't mean that everyone is the U.S. is madder than a box of frogs though.

    3. John Smith 19 Gold badge
      Unhappy

      Re: It's a joke

      "They wouldn't go for it, would they?"

      They funded SLS.

      What do you think?

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

    4. Euripides Pants Silver badge

      Re: It's a joke

      "They wouldn't go for it, would they?"

      They already have a Death Star. It's disguised to look like the moon.

      1. Rattus Rattus

        "It's disguised to look like the moon."

        That's no moon... It's a prison colony!

        (Yeah, yeah, I am aware most of you won't get this)

    5. henrydddd
      FAIL

      Re: It's a joke

      The epetition site is a gathering point for crazies. The funny thing is that people would even think that we need to spend trillions to fight Darth Vader when there are millions of people starving to death in this world is beyond anything that I can think. If violence makes a better world, the earth would be a paradise by now. Sad

  2. Matt 52
    WTF?

    $852,000,000,000,000,000

    That's how much it would cost..... oh, and it'd take 0.8 million years to complete.

    http://www.centives.net/S/2012/how-much-would-it-cost-to-build-the-death-star/

    1. GitMeMyShootinIrons

      Re: $852,000,000,000,000,000

      A job for life then...

    2. Captain TickTock
      Devil

      Re: $852,000,000,000,000,000

      "Perhaps I can find new ways to motivate them. "

    3. RICHTO Silver badge
      Mushroom

      Re: $852,000,000,000,000,000

      That will be the Exchange rate to £1 before the deathstar is built the way their budget deficit is heading....

    4. Allan George Dyer Silver badge
      Mushroom

      Re: $852,000,000,000,000,000

      0.8 million years... that's a relief. Someone else can worry about the USA taking "friendly fire" to a whole new level.

    5. WorkingFromHome

      Re: $852,000,000,000,000,000

      Couldn't they just make the moon look like a Death Star?

      That way all you would need is a load of old toilet rolls, yoghurt pots and some double sided sticky tape.

      It could even count as recycling...

    6. ravenviz
      Headmaster

      Re: $852,000,000,000,000,000

      That's only 1.6% GDP if spread over that time period.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: $852,000,000,000,000,000

        Foxconn could build it for one tenth the price.

  3. GitMeMyShootinIrons

    That's not a moon...

    .... It's a state funded infrastructure investment program

    1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge

      Re: That's not a moon...

      First they'll need a huge sign that says "Your tax dollars at work".

    2. TRT Silver badge
      Alert

      Re: That's not a moon...

      OK, so the superstructure may be built and manufactured by the US, but I know for a fact that the fleet of defensive fighters to be stationed on board will be sourced from Thailand.

    3. Don Jefe

      Re: That's not a moon... @GitMeMyShootIrons

      The state funded infrastructures (science, art and manufacturing) are what made it affordable for you to purchase the device you are using to whing on the state funded INTERNET.

      1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
        Thumb Down

        Re: That's not a moon... @GitMeMyShootIrons

        > The state funded infrastructures (science, art and manufacturing)

        Ah no, sir.

        Go back to "You didn't build that" state paternalism, please.

        1. Don Jefe
          FAIL

          Re: That's not a moon... @GitMeMyShootIrons

          Ha. Ha. Ha. Hahahahaha. You're really just trying to get that gold badge aren't you? There's no reason you'd post so much obviously contrary/trolling garbage otherwise.

          If you want to look into that fact you can log in to El Reg go to 'Formus' at the top right of the page (just left of the search box) and click 'My Posts'

          Who do you think pays for the Internet? See the post above that says that even though the U.S. pays all the trolling you do we still give you the right to do so. Suck that in your state paternalism & send me 40 quid for being a good sport and not calling you an first year college douche.

          1. Fibbles

            Re: That's not a moon... @GitMeMyShootIrons

            State funded internet? What is the complete bollocks you're talking? In the days of ARPANET you'd have a point. These days the vast majority of the Internet's infrastructure is owned by private entities from all over the planet.

            1. GitMeMyShootinIrons

              Re: That's not a moon... @GitMeMyShootIrons

              Blimey. There's a few people who forgot their meds today, aren't there? I take it that sense of humour is sadly lacking.

  4. jake Silver badge

    Morons wasting time.

    Kinda like most ElReg commentards.

    Releasing the trillions spent fending off the dusty goat-herders who have absolutely zero chance of invading North America, and putting that money into rebuilding our schools, hospitals, water & power systems, highways, and the people who live here in general, would be a far better option. IMO, of course.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Morons wasting time.

      Lighten up bro! Or we'll rename you captain buzzkill.

      1. jake Silver badge

        @AC 07:50 (was: Re: Morons wasting time.)

        Hard as it might be to believe, ACbuzzed, there really are non-buzzed adults posting here.

    2. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Re: Morons wasting time.

      > would be a far better option.

      Would have been a far better option.

      1. jake Silver badge

        @DAM (was: Re: Morons wasting time.)

        Still is a far better option. IMO, of course.

      2. frank ly Silver badge
        Happy

        @DAM Re: Morons wasting time.

        You are fixated on the past whereas Jake is thinking of the future.

        1. jake Silver badge

          @frank ly (was: Re: @DAM Morons wasting time.)

          DAM is quite correct. Us humans could have done better.

          But the past is past. Can we (as a global community) learn from our mistakes? Gut feeling is that humans are genetically incapable of thinking beyond the local hearth ... alas.

          1. Great Bu

            Learn from our mistakes.....

            Like this time, don't build it with an exhaust port that leads directly to the easily exploded reactor core.....

            1. TeeCee Gold badge

              Re: Learn from our mistakes.....

              That's no problem. It's ray-shielded and incoming torpedoes targetting it would be easily handled by the secondary armament.

              The only way you'd hit it would be to get in close in snub fighters and that would be suicidal.

            2. Crosseyed and Painless

              Re: Learn from our mistakes.....

              Or at least have a cover for it when under attack

    3. Robert Grant
      FAIL

      Re: Morons wasting time.

      How do you have a silver badge? Give me it.

      1. jake Silver badge

        @Robert Grant (was: Re: Morons wasting time.)

        "How do you have a silver badge?"

        Don't ask me, ask ElReg.

        "Give me it."

        That might explain everything ;-)

      2. Captain TickTock
        Headmaster

        Re: Morons wasting time.

        "How do you have a silver badge?"

        Read the House Rules

        (link on the post comment page)

        "Give me it."

        1. Give it to me.

        2. No.

        1. ukgnome Silver badge

          Re: Morons wasting time.

          I guess that's why it's in Bootnotes - the perfect place to waste time and comments.

          The idea isn't as stupid as you think (kinda) - a huge investment like this would lower unemployment and the country could work itself out of recession. Maybe start smaller though and build schools and social housing before going large.

          1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
            Devil

            Re: Morons wasting time.

            > a huge investment like this would lower unemployment and the country could work itself out of recession.

            Unfortunately this is NOT how reality works.

            The money to paid the guys and the goods to build that has to come from somewhere.

            It comes from tax dollars. Or, which is another way of putting, from the printing press.

            This makes it impossible for people to buy what they want or desire (a house, a new car, eggs for the fridge) if it's personal tax, and impossible to invest (into jobs or new plant) if it's company tax. Additionally, savings are being destroyed - so future activities will be curtailed, so will pension payouts etc.

            In effect, you are burning down the country. It would be just another bubble.

            Some people, those very near state, would of course get tremendously rich and powerful as in any command economy.

          2. Don Jefe

            Re: Morons wasting time.

            You could also just build a huge "THING" in the desert and reach the same employment goals you want without threatening the weaponizing of space and really pissed off countries because we violated a lot of treaties.

            I agree with your principal. Build things that encourage and enlighten kids. It doesn't have to be schools though. What about museums and planetariums and more publicly available NASA images that get kids started on the path to exploration.

        2. Lord Voldemortgage

          "Give me it."

          "Give me it!" is not grammatically incorrect, and is fairly widely used.

          1. Dave 126 Silver badge

            Re: "Give me it."

            >"Give me it!" is not grammatically incorrect, and is fairly widely used.

            Should have written "Gimme it!"

            Can't believe it took so long for someone to point out the exhaust chute design flaw.

            1. Benchops

              Re: "Give me it."

              The grammatically correct colloquialism is "Gitme!"

        3. Dodgy Geezer Silver badge
          Holmes

          Re: Morons wasting time.

          Overheard on a Saltmarsh

        4. Chimp

          Re: Morons wasting time.

          Give is arguably ditransitive. 'Give me it'sound s a bit rural, but it's defensible.

          1. Vic

            Re: Morons wasting time.

            > 'Give me it'sound s a bit rural, but it's defensible.

            Pronoun order in English tends to be much as it is in German- in which case, the phrase would correctly be "give it me".

            Vic.

    4. Chris007
      Black Helicopters

      Re: Morons wasting time. @jake

      Oh jake, how lovely and naive you are.

      Using your way lots of companies make a small amount money and the public benefit

      Our way a small number of defence companies make an absolute shed load of money and the company directors and shareholders benefit

      Please keep out of our business we know where you live.

      1. jake Silver badge

        Re: Morons wasting time. @jake

        "Please keep out of our business we know where you live"

        ::snicker::

        My companies make the parts that you think make you important.

        HAND :-)

    5. Alan Brown Silver badge

      Re: Morons wasting time.

      More like giving the military something else to do which doesn't involved annoying dusty goat herders and turning them into jihadists hellbent on invading the USA.

      1. dssf

        Re: Morons wasting time. dusty goat herders...

        Hehe, for a sec there i was thinking of Utah, (and of) Montana, and of silvery, glittery stuff anc of field tests on humans.

    6. annodomini2
      Devil

      Re: Morons wasting time.

      Having Morons waste their time is actually a good thing, stops them trying to do something they believe to be useful, but equally useless!

  5. Spaller
    Mushroom

    Texas nuke'em

    At least there'd be a way to deal with secessionist rebel planets, er, states.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Re: Texas nuke'em

      So you have to rename it "SPACE STATION ABRAHAM LINCOLN."

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Texas nuke'em

        Not Space Station Lincoln. Space Station Sherman.

  6. This post has been deleted by its author

  7. southpacificpom
    WTF?

    Is John D of Longmont a friend of John M from Belize (currently on holiday in Guatemala)?

  8. Michael Luke

    Speaking as an American, this can only be a good thing. With a death star, we could finally disolve the UN. Fear will keep the local systems in line. Fear of this battlestation.

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Sold1eR

      Don't put too much faith in this technological terror you've built.... (errr... planning to build)

    3. Ilgaz

      Small issue

      What to do with a Ak47 carrying guy riding a donkey in some remote Afghan mountain? Fire death rays?

      Welcome to age of non symmetrical warfare.

      1. 404 Silver badge
        Trollface

        Crowbars

        Fling crowbars with small guidance packages down the gravity well at them.

        Moving on".

        Wouldn't it be easier, since we're talking the unlimited power (cheap to zero price electricity and such) of the Empire, to grab a few asteroids, hollow one out, with the others to build it out (laser turrets, and such)?

        ;)

        *figure if everybody's going crazy, better act crazy to fit in. Works with Zombie Apocalypse too (yeah Bill Murray got himself killed, but what are the odds?)

        1. Dave 126 Silver badge

          Re: Crowbars

          Bill Murry? Zombie Apocalypse? I politely suggest you're either thinking of Zombieland (2009)... or possibly Coffee and Cigarettes (2003) if you mistook Iggy Pop for a zombie.

      2. TeeCee Gold badge
        Happy

        Re: Small issue

        Yeah, fuck you. And the donkey you rode in on. And the mountain it was walking on.

    4. Peter Murphy
      Stop

      "With a death star, we could finally disolve the UN."

      If so, then you better move their head office out of New York first. Because turning your largest city into a pile of lava just to get at the UN would just look bloody stupid.

    5. dssf

      to hell with DEATH stars...

      Why not a few Battlestars, and go mining in the asteroid belts.

      But, i would take a borg cube over a death star any day.

  9. vmistery

    But the question I want to know the answer too - Are these the droids I am looking for? And what would a Death Start make Obama?

    1. jake Silver badge

      @vmistery

      "And what would a Death Start make Obama?"

      A preliminary corpse, like all the rest of us humans?

      (Honestly, sometimes I wonder why I bother ...)

  10. lukewarmdog
    Gimp

    lukewarmdog

    Well I signed. Sure I'm a non-American but there will be jobs for all. You can't rule space without a supply of Storm Troopers and I really, really, really want to wipe out Jar Jar Banks planet.

    1. frank ly Silver badge
      Mushroom

      Re: lukewarmdog

      Is he the one who was responsible for the binking crisis? Nuke him from orbit!

  11. Silverburn
    Happy

    Hitler

    Apart from the Godwin win, can I raise the issue that the last head of state to undertake a state-sponsored "war machine" project of this magnitude was Hitler?

    And we know how well that worked out...

    footnote: yeah, I know it's a joke

    1. The First Dave
      Headmaster

      Re: Hitler

      Surely you mean the USA with the Manhattan Project?

      1. Silverburn
        Thumb Up

        Re: Hitler

        Yes probably...but then I'd have missed out on Godwin points.

  12. This post has been deleted by its author

  13. Flugal

    Will it also include the kind of weak spot included in the original that, if you happen to hit with a laser, means the whole thing explodes? It did seem something of an odd feature.

    If they do choose to include it, any idea if there's an American company which specialises in including huge vulnerabilities in its products that might be called upon?

    1. Tom 260

      Well, the weak spot gag worked on the Bismarck, one torpedo to the port rudder (and a whole lot of other fortunate circumstances leading up to that), and it's going round in circles, an easy target when the KGV and Rodney caught up.

      1. Silverburn
        Unhappy

        Strictly speaking the rudder weakness is universal to all ship.

        What I think would be more a more accurate representation would be the magazine room on the HMS Hood. (RIP btw).

        1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

          @Strictly speaking the rudder weakness is universal to all ship.

          And yet they laughed at my 1000,000 ton battle jetski

    2. Alan Brown Silver badge

      Hence calling it "Space Station Sherman"

  14. Magister
    Pint

    All joking aside..

    There are a lot of people (in the USA and outside of it) that complain about the US space programme; one of the most common complaints is ".. all that money is wasted.." (or similar comments).

    The total expenditure on the US space programme since the 1960s works out at about 5 cents per person in the USA per day over that time; are there any sweets (candies) that can still be purchased for that price anymore? (a single strip of gum for example). Most people (in the UK at least) spend more than that every day on using their mobile phone.

    Meanwhile, a lot of technology (OK not all, but a lot) has been proven to have applications in many other areas; medicine, engineering, communications, navigation, meterology, amongst others. Many tens of thousands of jobs were created in the public sector, but many hundreds of thousands were created in the private sector (some of them in other countries as well).

    Any large scale project of this kind can have a re-vitalising affect on a nation; just think of the feel good factor that came from the Olympics this year.

    (A useful discussion can be found here http://www.freakonomics.com/2008/01/11/is-space-exploration-worth-the-cost-a-freakonomics-quorum/)

    1. annodomini2

      Re: All joking aside..

      A better way to look at it I have found is vs their military budget.

      NASA 2011 budget: $18.4B

      US 2011 Military budget: ~$1200B

      Or NASA's budget is ~1.5% of the US Military budget (in 2011!)

      1. Magister

        Re: All joking aside..

        Think about this one: annual expenditure in the USA

        NASA = $18 billion

        Alcoholic drinks = $160 billion

        1. TRT Silver badge

          Re: All joking aside..

          Moonshine.

        2. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

          Re: All joking aside..

          So America sends 10x as much on their army as they do on booze?

          That's your problem - right there

        3. Alan Brown Silver badge

          Re: All joking aside..

          Even pizza delivery costs dwarf NASA's budget

  15. BillboBaggins
    Thumb Down

    @ Michael Luke

    This may come as a surprise to many Americans but…

    You are NOT the world police!

    I live in the UK and I’m glad we are not the ones who think that they can over consume and impose their will on the world. I’m also glad we don’t have oil, otherwise we’d be looking at an American invasion sometime soon.

    1. RICHTO Silver badge
      Mushroom

      Re: @ Michael Luke

      But we do have Oil - lots of it. And Gas. And Coal. However, im sure we are on the to do list, somewhere after France.....

      1. Roger Varley

        Re: @ Michael Luke

        Nah - we'll be OK. Most yanks have never heard of the UK, and of those that have, most of them think it's place near London.

        1. Nigel 11
          Facepalm

          Re: @ Michael Luke

          Isn't that HAD lots of oil? There's not a lot left, and the Scots may take those dregs with them when they vote for independance ... and shortly afterwards, get invaded by the USA?

          Back in the real world, it's actually the USA that again has lots of oil, thanks to fraccing technology and abundant supplies of oil shale.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: @ Michael Luke

          I know where you live!!!

          lol.

        3. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

          Re: @ Michael Luke

          Except with the Storm Troopers marksmanship - they would aim at France and hit Britain

    2. BillboBaggins
      Pint

      Re: @ Michael Luke

      Why the down votes?! Cause I dare suggest that America is not the cnetre of the univers/world!?

      Get over yourselves.

      <--- cause I'm having one or three this evening.

      1. Tom Maddox Silver badge
        Thumb Down

        Re: @ Michael Luke

        "Why the down votes?!"

        Because you've shown yourself to be utterly devoid of a sense of humor.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: @BilboBaggins @ Michael Luke

      Stop filling your mind with the rebellion, young baggins - you place is here with your Aunt Beru.

      Oh, and have a have a downvote for completely missing the joke.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: @ Michael Luke

      "I’m also glad we don’t have oil, otherwise we’d be looking at an American invasion sometime soon."

      One small problem with a UK invasion by the yanks: NATO, but...

      I for one would not be at all surprised if the US has a contemporary equivalent of 'Plan Red' with some contingency including the Falkland Islands should the anticipated quantities of oil and gas be found (and be commercially viable) by current exploratory drilling (which may not prove to be the case across the board: Link).

      They remained unsupportive of the UK's 'claims' during the Falklands War in 1982 and even now they seek to remain in some sense 'neutral' by refusing to acknowledge sovereignty.

      Obama wants to encourage 'talks' between Argentina and the UK and he has also backed Argentina's calls for negotiations.

      No, I am not a conspiracy theorist, I am just old enough to be a cynic and understand that many, many nations have such contingency plans in place tucked away for a rainy day.

      But as for the Death Star, remember Ronald Regan and his Strategic Defense Initiative? No doubt the US still has a thriving spaceborne weapons technology programme, just maybe not a Death Star.

    5. Dan Paul
      Devil

      Re: @ BilboBaggins & @ Michael Luke

      No, we are not the world police, and since Obama came into office, we are being more cautious about inserting ourselves in the role as "police". (Except for ridding the world of Bin Laden and some of his associates and providing NATO air support in Libya and elswhere.

      However, allow me to remind you that today is December 7th, Pearl Harbor Day "A day that will live in infamy" when the USA formally joined the Allies in World War Two.

      Those who forget their history are doomed to repeat it, apparently, you have forgotten that it was the USA that bailed your collective asses out of a jam back then.

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

      2. BillboBaggins
        Pint

        Re: @ BilboBaggins & @ Michael Luke

        Actually Roosevelt did not ask congress to declare war on Japan till 8th December 1941, the day after Pearl Harbour.

        Germany and Italy declared war on America on December 11th. America reciprocated the same day.

        By then the war (which had started in 1939) had already been going for nearly 2 years.

        And for helping out in a tight spot, I salute you.

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: @ BilboBaggins & @ Michael Luke

        "...ridding the world of Bin Laden and some of his associates and providing NATO air support in Libya and elswhere"

        And therein lies some awful hypocrisy and self-centered political interests.

        Let's not forget that historically the US has at the very least two definitions of terrorism. Apparently killing innocent men, women and children is not OK where the victims are American, but is to be tolerated or indeed supported when it happens to others - think Noraid, Peter King, Tom McBride etc.

        "Those who forget their history are doomed to repeat it, apparently, you have forgotten that it was the USA that bailed your collective asses out of a jam back then"

        The USA alone did not save the free world nor did it alone save 'our collective asses'. That was achieved by the (Free) French, Poland, Britain, Australia, Canada, South Africa, New Zealand, India et.al. History does not conclude that the US won WW2, that was achieved by the Allies as a whole, and not America alone.

        An example which typifies American political sentiment of the day is one General Clark and his desire to be seen as the liberator of Rome and a saviour of the free world following the events of Monte Cassino.

        In his quest to liberate an unoccupied Rome, some historians perhaps justifiably argue that he in fact directly contributed to extending the war in his acknowledged lust for glory.

        He was more concerned with his little place in history than he was in destroying the German 10th. Not my kind of saviour, nor that of the 36th "Texas" Division at the Rapido.

        Now that's only one single example. There are other similar ones to consider, on all sides. But to state that America bailed out the rest of the world alone is absurdly wrong and is an insult to all those who died fighting - of any nationality.

        1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

          Re: @ BilboBaggins & @ Michael Luke

          I think you will find that the USSR had a not insignificant role in the victory over Nazi Germany.

          (Comment not applicable in France - where a Mr de Gaulle personally won WWII)

        2. DanceMan
          Boffin

          Re: USA alone did not save the free world

          "That was achieved by the (Free) French, Poland, Britain, Australia, Canada, South Africa, New Zealand, India et.al."

          I support your overall theme, but you forgot one rather significant nation -- Russia. They weren't heroes, making a deal with Hitler to carve up Poland at the beginning of the war, but they paid a high price in lives and contributed significantly in men and production eventually. Apparently Mr. Hilter didn't get as far in reading history as Napoleon invading Russia.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: USA alone did not save the free world

            "I support your overall theme, but you forgot one rather significant nation -- Russia"

            Agreed. Somewhat poor on my part to have omitted the USSR from the list.

        3. Dan Paul
          Devil

          @Mike Hock

          Perhaps, the next time someone asks for help, the USA should just sit on it's hands like the protectionists want.

          No nation is without it's hypocrisy, Britain certainly has exhibited, shall we say "flexible", definitions of terrorism. There are always "individuals" who crave fame and power, all military leaders have similar faults as Patton or Clark or Rommel or Hitler, Stalin or any other.

          Perhaps you need to remember actual history though, roughly 13 million Americans served overseas in WW2, 16 million overall. That number is greater than all the other allies combined. That does not count the factory workers or the Merchant Marine that brought food and supplies to Britain.

          Once you add to that the sheer number of ordinary US Citizens involved in producing and delivering equipment & food for WW2 and their sacrifices, you might come to the conclusion that you should owe a debt of gratitude to the US for "bailing your collective asses out of a jam".

          It is neither absurdly wrong nor is it an insult, it is a statement of fact. Had the USA not entered the war, this would likely be a German speaking website right now. No one said "we one it alone", you inferred that in your own mind, not from my words.

          My (GRHS) father served in WW2 as a bombardier/navigator in a B24 and flew out of England and Sicily. He did his best to help win the war even to the point of flying missions after he could have gone home wounded. He didn't ask for any glory, conquests or thanks.

          He knew what was right and what was wrong and he did his duty.

      4. Alan Brown Silver badge

        Re: @ BilboBaggins & @ Michael Luke

        I believe the engines of the aeroplanes which hit Pearl Harbour had "FORD" written on them.

        There's lots of money to be made in selling to both sides.

        1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

          Re: @ BilboBaggins & @ Michael Luke

          >I believe the engines of the aeroplanes which hit Pearl Harbour had "FORD" written on them.

          Hence Churchill's genius in having Lucas supply the Luftwaffe

  16. Andy The Hat Silver badge
    Happy

    Blokes called "Will" are already building shelters before they get fired at ...

  17. Captain TickTock
    Black Helicopters

    So that's what they really want to do at L2...

    NASA suggests robotic return to the Moon

    Although L5 has a better view of Earth. But they could re-enact the Battle of Yavin as they come out from behind the moon.

  18. ElsieEffsee

    didn't they try this. ...

    a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away?

  19. annodomini2
    WTF?

    I thought...

    Aren't there treaties 'preventing' the weaponisation of space?

    If true this would 'never' happen. ;)

    1. Colin Miller

      Re: I thought...

      Yup, the Outer Space Treaty and the Moon Treaty ban the use of WMD in space or any military use of the Moon (and other celestial objects).

      Before it was signed, there was talk of siloing Ballistic Nuclear Missiles on satellites, ready to be dropped on your enemy-de-jour.

      1. Nigel 11

        Re: I thought...

        You don't need WMD if you've colonised the moon. You just need a mass-driver and a pile of big rocks. The first space war may be fought with (updated) stone-age technology and stone-age military strategy, and will inevitably be won by the moon because it's the really high ground.

        Heinlein "The Moon is a Harsh Mistress" set this scenario in 2076. 64 years to go. Still just about possible.

        1. TRT Silver badge

          Re: I thought...

          Yes, but the US Constitution gives them the right to bear arms; a giant, space-borne weapons platform is a guaranteed right under the Sith amendment.

    2. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: I thought...

      Ancient Tantoonie proverb say: Man with planet destroying death star don't need no treaties.

  20. Crisp Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    Spacestation Cum Superweapon

    Watch where you're pointing that thing!

    Paris, Just because.

  21. THECADMAN
    Pint

    Hitler ????

    I thought you were talking about ... ' Good Old Ronnie Raygun '

    Now, there was a man with a plan (SDI)

    Icon ... because its Friday

  22. MegC
    Go

    Jobs for the English!

    I like this initiative by the Americans, they will of course need plenty of English accents around the Death Star once it's complete to give it that authentic feel.

    Now, assuming the size of the Death Star is relatively (thats no) moon sized it should create jobs for everyone in the UK.

    1. Crisp Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Jobs for the English!

      Where do I sign up!?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Jobs for the English!

      Just remember to quit your job a few weeks before construction is completed...

      And Move out of the blast zone!

    3. Simon Westerby 1

      Re: Jobs for the English!

      Thats going to be one hell of a daily commute ..

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Just one question...

    Don't Apple already have the patents?

    1. Swoop

      Re: Just one question...

      No, their design is rectangular with round corners.

      1. TRT Silver badge

        Re: Just one question...

        The Death Cuboid?

        Sorry... the iDeath.

        1. NoOnions
          Coat

          Apple to sue the Borg.

          See above...

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Surely the easier option would just be to steel plate the actual moon, and fit massive engines to it. Then all you need do is tunnel out the corridors, lift shafts, prison cells, giant cavernous rooms with switches that go 'neeeeeeeeeeewwwwmmm'.

    1. TRT Silver badge
      Happy

      Now, if you could find a way to convert moondust into a pliable material that could be deposited by 3D printers and CADCAM systems...

      No, wait. Already been done. :)

    2. Crisp Silver badge

      If I were you I'd keep those plans somewhere safe

      Like in an R2 unit.

    3. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      That's no moon - that's a space station

  25. graeme leggett

    "That's not a moon, that's a distraction from our current domestic crisis"

  26. Christian Berger Silver badge

    Not the worst idea

    I mean seriously, this would create jobs. This would drain resources from more harmful activities like normal wars. And it would keep the military happy.

  27. Dire Criti¢

    All they need to do to fund it is...

    ...remove all tax breaks for religious organisations.

    There's trillions right there!

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: All they need to do to fund it is...

      They would just convert themselves into coffee shops.

      An even more slavish cultish and addicted congregation - and no taxes

  28. Jemma Silver badge

    A "fully operational" battle station in US hands...

    What could possibly go wrong....?

    The scary thing about America is that year on year of its existance its been involved in more genocides either directly or indirectly than any other nation on the planet (even Russia) - look it up, its actually true (US arms actually help Stalin get at least 3 under way). Couple that with military tacticians that make the cloned offsping of Lord Chelmsford, Lord Rust and General Ephinstone (of Afghanistan 'fame') look talented, and you have a Casserene/Little Big Horn waiting to happen... With turbolasers.

    Personally I feel nervous when I see America eying the plastic travel cutlery displays, let alone offensive weapons.

    I'm really happy I'm not a soldier too, since while having the French as allies historically meant your right flank tended to resemble a large cloud of dust moving at speed to the rear - the average American is the only person on the planet whos known for shooting his allies in the front (and even has a code for when it invariably happens).

    The scariest part of the lot, is that there will be some people who actually think this idea is genuine... And will be disappointed when it doesnt happen, real disappointed.

    1. BillboBaggins
      Coffee/keyboard

      Re: A "fully operational" battle station in US hands...

      "Personally I feel nervous when I see America eying the plastic travel cutlery displays, let alone offensive weapons."

      You Sir, owe me a new keyboard!

      1. Jemma Silver badge

        Re: A "fully operational" battle station in US hands...

        Ummm...

        *looks at her chest to check the girls are all present & correct*

    2. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: A "fully operational" battle station in US hands...

      >What could possibly go wrong....?

      Well a bunch of desert dwelling "freedom fighters" in robes could fly an aircraft into it and due to some cost saving code violations in the thermal protection have it be completely destroyed.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: A "fully operational" battle station in US hands...

        "Well a bunch of desert dwelling "freedom fighters" in robes could fly an aircraft into it and due to some cost saving code violations in the thermal protection have it be completely destroyed."

        Sorry, are we still discussing Jemmas twin towers?

  29. Anonymous John

    "I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if billions of voices cried out in terror "We didn't mean you to point it at Earth!", and were suddenly silenced. I fear something terrible has happened."

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Don't worry. I hear they are building a Gay Death Star; it wants to blow up Uranus.

  30. Ben Norris
    Pint

    Due to internation treaties on weapons in space it would in fact have to be a Fun Star instead

    1. TeeCee Gold badge
      Meh

      Given that and the originally intended purpose, I can't help thinking that a moon-sized station shaped like an enormous penis would be appropriate.

  31. Ken Hagan Gold badge

    5000 signatories

    Pah! Out of a population of 300 million, that's nothing.

    El Reg posted an article on the subject and had 100 comments within the hour.

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: 5000 signatories

      How many signatures do you need on a Number10 e-petition thingy ?

      1. annodomini2

        Re: 5000 signatories

        >100,000 signatories

  32. Marketing Hack Silver badge
    Mushroom

    The Death Star as a government infrastructure program would make a lot of sense

    After all, only the government would design a multi-zillion Dollar piece of equipment that can be taken out because some teenager dropped a bomb in the HVAC system :)

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: The Death Star as a government infrastructure program would make a lot of sense

      They have thought of that.

      A new law will raise the minimum age for a pilots license to 21.

  33. Hillman_Hunter
    Mushroom

    Worked for Ronald Raygun

    The Reagan initiated Star War's program in the 80's did for Communism, economic recession, Arthur Scargil and the Miners strike, flared trousers, sunday closing, free school meals and created 1000s of kim dot com billionaires , Xfactor judges, The Smiths, the iPod, reinvented religious intolerance solved the oil crisis and lead to the word wide domination of home furnishing supplier Ikea, so what not to like.

  34. Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

    Just to prevent a tiny accident....

    Lets hope they put in something a little more substantial than "ray shielding" over those delicate little exhaust ports.

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    just to prevent a bigger accident ...

    don't let Richard Grainger anywhere near it. Given how wonderfully successful is reign over the NHS IT project was, he'd build it so it only worked in an atmosphere.

  36. Hawkmoth
    Holmes

    death star economics

    Interesting petition but hardly original. A number of us participated in an exhaustive discussion of the politico-economics of deathstars in http://www.overthinkingit.com/2011/04/25/star-wars-death-star-economics/. I came away from that with the feeling that whether death star construction was a good investment or not had more to do with the economic patterns and organization among star systems, not on the direct benefits of construction contracts and hiring all those storm troopers, even if you figure in construction of shield generators and garrisoning small forest moons. In fact, the discussion was such a smashup discussion that the readers of overthinkingit voted it the most popular discussion of 2011.

  37. johnwerneken
    Mushroom

    Go For It Barack!

    Although I myself lack and seek a job as I like choices that income brings I think jobs are a bit over rated. Being useful can be accomplished without pay; getting a living COULD be accomplished without EVERYONE working, and it should be IMHO. But there are other good possibilities here, besides jobs.

    Attracting minds to innovation may be a good thing in itself. Technology to make use of off-Earth resources and to make off-Earth habitation plausible is fundamentally necessary. People could already end civilization and possibly humanity if they chose to, so far, we have not; another means to that end would not change that.

  38. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    2016?!?!

    What use is 2016?! we need it in two weeks time!!!

  39. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Already

    Don't be ridiculous. Doesn't everyone know that they already have on@%(&^NO Carrier

  40. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    No worries. There are enough Jedi's in the UK to deal with this threat.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jedi_census_phenomenon

    1. Red Bren

      Enough Jedi?

      I thought their fire had gone from the universe?

  41. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Deployment?

    Say we have it, how do we test it? It was built for alien defense(offense), but if no aliens are present at completion...? We can't hit other countries with it, so Jersey it is? How about Florida, would you miss it?

  42. tony trolle

    cheaper

    just cover the moon its self in tinfoil to make a fake deathstar. Would also brighten up the night sky.

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