back to article The iPHONE 5 UNDERMINES western DEMOCRACY: 5 reasons why

Thinking of buying a new iPhone 5 after it gets announced later today? Don't. Owning it will mark you out as an easily-led simpleton - and worse, the purchase will undermine western democracy. Our last digest along these lines was published prior to iPhone Day last year, but as it turned out - and who are we to say just why - …

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  1. PassiveSmoking
    FAIL

    Your butt hurt amuses me.

    1. NumptyScrub

      quote: "Your butt hurt amuses me."

      Your butthurt at his butthurt amuses me :)

      I make my purchasing decisions by my own criteria, and other people can make them by theirs. That doesn't stop me having opinions about the validity of their purchasing decisions though ;)

      This article contains a buttload of usual Lewis hyperbole, true, but it doesn't mean that the initial points aren't valid. My last "phone" (i.e. personal compute device) purchasing decision was made with "replaceable battery", and "removable storage" being 2 of the requisite criteria. For me, those 2 points are crucial, and I will not consider a device that does not have either, regardless of the name on the front.

      YMMV of course, but don't assume that any feature Apple omits is by definition worthless, and therefore anyone moaning about the lack of said features is just a whiny crybaby. Some of us are perfectly capable of deciding for ourselves which features are important, and which are just fluff, and will therefore have our own opinion of the worth of any new device on the market :)

      1. Arctic fox
        Thumb Up

        @NumptyScrub

        Upvote delivered - I agree entirely.

      2. h4rm0ny

        Replacable battery was one of the deciding factors in me buying a cheaper phone over a more expensive version of it. Ironic that their cheaper phone had a significant selling point over a phone a couple of hundred pounds more expensive). It's not even only that I might want to swap in a fully charged one in a hurry (though this is good), but because I don't trust longevity of batteries. Maybe someone who only plans for their phone to last a year has no problem. But batteries wear out and if I want mine to be usable three years from now, I want to know that I can replace the battery.

        Unless battery technology has come on along way since the last time I bought a laptop four years ago?

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        YMMV of course, but don't assume that any feature Apple omits is by definition worthless, and therefore anyone moaning about the lack of said features is just a whiny crybaby. Some of us are perfectly capable of deciding for ourselves which features are important, and which are just fluff, and will therefore have our own opinion of the worth of any new device on the market :)

        Indeed very true. It's just a shame so many posters here don't have the class to allow iPhone owners the same courtesy of deciding for themselves what features they do and don't want in a phone. Instead it's a constant barrage of comments about "iSheeple" and how they would blindly buy anything from Apple. Apparently the idea people might be buying iPhones because it has the features they want never enters their heads.

        Ask an iPhone owner what they like about their phone and they'll tell you all the things they like about it. Ask an Android owner and all you get are reasons why they think it's better than an iPhone. Says it all really.

        1. TraceyC
          Stop

          "Ask an iPhone owner what they like about their phone and they'll tell you all the things they like about it. Ask an Android owner and all you get are reasons why they think it's better than an iPhone. Says it all really."

          Did you copy pasta that from the last smart phone discussion here? Bit of a broad brush there.Phone did better?

          Seriously, when people ask me what I like about my Droid, I tell them what I like about my Droid. Not all Android users are keen to bash people for differences in purchasing decisions. I *do* include reasons like "I like having choice of where I can install apps from". I can say that without dissing the iPhone specifically, as the BlackBerry doesn't provide that kind of choice either.

          Really kids, many people who buy smartphones, whatever the brand, have rational reasons for buying what they did. Each smartphone has it's fanbois. Do we really need to repeat these kinds of comments in every single smartphone discussion? How about, oh, I dunno, discussing the points in the article?

    2. Arctic fox
      Trollface

      Your utter inability to understand that Lewis is taking the piss.......

      ........big time amuses the hell out of me. By the way old chap, which phone are you planning to rush out and buy very shortly?

      1. taxman
        Happy

        Re: Your utter inability to understand that Lewis is taking the piss.......

        Must be true - even the BBC (Gawd bless'em) have posted not to get one:

        http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-19557497

      2. Manu T

        Re: Your utter inability to understand that Lewis is taking the piss.......

        "By the way old chap, which phone are you planning to rush out and buy very shortly?"

        None. I have a perfectly capable Nokia 701 Symbian Belle FP1 device.

        - Symbian is European tech (originally from Psion)

        - Nokia used to be a European company

        As for the technical matters

        - It's full multitasking unlike Apple's offering (and unlike Nokia's WP-devices for that matter)

        - full bluetooth transfers and syncing

        - full 2 way call recording

        - loud loudspeaker (very usefull when phone in a leather case AND in trousers or backpack)

        - notification light

        - battery charging light

        - both microUSB (fragile connector) and 2mm jack (sturdy connector) charging

        - Internal storage AND complementary microSD-card slot

        - removable battery

        - true offline navigation (with addressbook- and calendar tie-in)

        - doesn't burn a hole in my trousers

        - doesn't require me to put a condom over my head (or phone) to make and receive calls.

        Nope, I guess I'll stick to this one for the time being.

        Untill I meet a nice Android or other device that meets the above requirements. (especially the call recording seems to be a problem)

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Your utter inability to understand that Lewis is taking the piss.......

          "- It's full multitasking unlike Apple's offering (and unlike Nokia's WP-devices for that matter)"

          Nonsense. Plenty of apps can run in the background on iOS, but most developers choose to stop them running as what's the point in leaving your 3D graphics engine or image processing app rendering in the background where no-one can see it and it's wasting battery power and tying up the CPU?

          I'm glad Windows Phone does the same thing as I remember years of crap Windows CE devices that would just leave everything running in the background and drag the device to its knees.

      3. PassiveSmoking
        Thumb Up

        Re: Your utter inability to understand that Lewis is taking the piss.......

        One of those retro 70s ones with the big chunky 9 digit keypad and the angular handset one one of those coiled cables that manage to tie themselves in knots in 5 minutes.

        1. Arctic fox
          Trollface

          @Passive Smoking Re:"One of those retro 70s ones with the big chunky 9 digit keypad......."

          Ah I see. You're planning to wait until the iPhone 6 comes out.

      4. RICHTO Silver badge
        Mushroom

        Re: Your utter inability to understand that Lewis is taking the piss.......

        A Lumia 920 is in my sights....

        1. hplasm Silver badge
          Devil

          Re: A Lumia 920 is in my sights....

          Open fire!

      5. Anonymous Coward
        Happy

        Re: Your utter inability to understand that Lewis is taking the piss.......

        He is not taking the piss - he is airing LEGITIMATE grievances on product design, the pricing structure and aftermarket spares.

        I also have nothing but contempt for these corporate shit head types, living in the land called "the Great Australian Gouge"..

        What he says is true - no "On the run replaceable battery", the phones have no memory card slot, but they charge hundreds more for the same phone, that has say 4G of memory, to one of say 16G of memory in it....

        All this scummy product design and sleazy marketing, to scam and mince and screw basic sanity and functionality - and gouging like fuck in the process.

        There is nothing "taking the piss" about that.

        It's just corporate stupidity and scumbaggery - and they can pull it off for a while, and while I may not need a flashy smart phone, when say Samsung brings out the same STYLE of phone, with a card slot, a replaceable battery and it's priced at 1/2 of what Apple sell it their crap for - well I won't buy it because I don't want it or need it, but if I did, I would.

        Reminds me of fucking BMW in Australia - selling the Valero (piece of shit) starter motors for the motorbikes - for nearly $800 each - and there is more metal and a higher build quality in a $15 discount power tool. At least the magnets don't come loose, from the shit glue used to bond them into the case.

        Fuck BMW and Apple too.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "Your butt hurt amuses me."

      When my girlfriend gets that evil gleam in her eye, and straps something intimidatingly large on, my butt hurt positively thrills me <3

      1. Dick Pountain

        Re: "Your butt hurt amuses me."

        Is this "intimidatingly large" thing an Apple product?

        1. Mephistro Silver badge
          Coat

          Re: "Your butt hurt amuses me." (@ Dick Pountain)

          "Is this "intimidatingly large" thing an Apple product?"

          No, I think is more of a 'Banana' product.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: "Your butt hurt amuses me."

        We don't want to read about your sicknesses on a tech site - pervert.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "Thinking of buying a new iPhone 5 after it gets announced later today? Don't. Owning it will mark you out as an easily-led simpleton"

    W O W, i've been telling people for a few years now, but no one wants to listen!

    Too Simple!

    1. the-it-slayer
      Facepalm

      iPhone owners don't have the time to care...

      ...about any of the things listed in this ridiculously written article. And no-one listens because most reasons given by the likes of yourself are anti-Apple rubbish plucked out of thin air without any substance. Lewis must of been on an anger trip to claim that the iPhone is single handedly ruining the western capitalist economy. Anyway, shame other companies don't take the same care when it comes to design and quality. Losing the ability the replace the battery, have a MicroSD slot and having locked down apps is all worth the sacrifice IMHO. Better security and whatever else. Simplicity makes any product better. You only have to look at the most popular products since the dawn of modern technology to see that.

      Anyone worrying about those points has too much time and worries about technology too much. No-one's pointing the gun at your head. Any fandroid here could quite easily turn a blind eye and ignore this release. Unfortunately, Lewis has lost any cred of being a decent writer. Sorry. It's the truth.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: iPhone owners don't have the time to care...

        Too right, too busy having more sex and earning more money... lol.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: iPhone owners don't have the time to care... (Anon 19:09)

          Like all the unemployed (sorry... serial mature students...) folks whose tweets and facebook postings all day have been all about how much they want the new iPhone5 because they're getting sick and tired of the shortcomings of their current iPhone 4s? You mean those guys earning all that money?

          Y'funny.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: iPhone owners don't have the time to care...

          Re: iPhone owners don't have the time to care...

          Too right, too busy having more sex WITH THEIR HANDS and earning more MONOPOLOY money...

          Are you really so stupid as to believe that owning an idiotPhone means your more likley to have more sex/money? S T U P I D!

          1. Doogie1
            Facepalm

            Re: iPhone owners don't have the time to care...

            "MONOPOLOY"

            You call other people stupid and you can't even spell. Maybe you should try using both hands?

        3. Thorne
          Gimp

          Re: iPhone owners don't have the time to care...

          "Too right, too busy having more sex and earning more money... lol."

          Wearing a gimp suit down at the wharves to earn enough money to buy the latest piece of iCrap

      2. Chris Parsons

        Re: iPhone owners don't have the time to care...

        Not being able to replace the battery gives you better security? Are you sure?

        1. Thorne

          Re: iPhone owners don't have the time to care...

          "Not being able to replace the battery gives you better security? Are you sure?"

          Yeah, nobody can steal your battery

      3. Naughtyhorse
        Coat

        Re: iPhone owners don't have the time to care...

        is that because they are all creatives?

        <cough-baristas-cough>

        mines the one that keeps you dry however you hold it

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      The problem is you don't have the media telling these easily-led simpleton's to listen to you.

      But who is buying these phones anyway? I've been in the mobile industry for over 25 years and I'm yet to be impressed by an iPhone. As a phone they are mediocre, and as portable gaming device they are at best mediocre, but most often poor. For mobile internet you really need a bigger screen to make it usable. So where is the appeal? You would thing that doing 3 things poorly but all in one product shouldn't result in stellar sales, yet it has.

      I was at a meeting not long ago with about a dozen executives all in the mobile industry and not one had an iphone, it was all Android and Blackberry. Except for those that worked for handset manufacturers all of these people could have any phone they wanted and yet not one picked an iPhone. So it would appear that only those that know nothing about phones would pick an iPhone.

      1. the-it-slayer
        Facepalm

        But why is the iPhone anymore mediocre for the reasons you state in comparison to say equivalent Android/WP phones? It's an unjustified point. Whether it's a 3.5", 4" or 4.5" screen; they're all poor for general internet sites that don't have mobile optimised sites. Portable gaming? It's the same size (if yet bigger) than screens of older portable products in the past (Gameboy etc). The phone in turn offers more power to run better games. The lack of physical controls is a downpoint, but why use those points against the iPhone when they apply to all smartphones? A smartphone is can muster all functions realtively well, but no phone of that size will give you what you described well. You have to go to a tablet to get that! But going back to your original point, the iPhone sells well because it operates better than any other phone at gaming, browsing etc because of it's simplicity. Why doesn't anyone get that? My previous RIM and Android devices prior to the iP4 were very complicated and cumbersome to use (along with being unreliable). I'd feel sorry for any "simpleton" as you call them to use them without fuss.

        I'm sure your executive meeting were all technical based. It doesn't surprise me because I work in an IT office with coders, developers with a nerdy tack to their personality. However, most have this distrust of Apple. Fair enough, but they bobble on about the same unjustified points.

        I know a lot about phones, technology etc. I picked the iPhone for simplicity because I don't want to have to reflash an Android phone every day to iron out bugs/optimise it that should of been picked up by the original coders. I do enough coding, installing, reflashing in my day-to-day job. It works as a phone better than any of phone I owned previously.

        Simplicity. Remember that word.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          "But why is the iPhone anymore mediocre for the reasons you state in comparison to say equivalent Android/WP phones?"

          Because the iPhone costs twice as much as an Android phone with similar specs.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          "Simplicity. Remember that word."

          Simplicity for the simple minded!

      2. chr0m4t1c

        Would that be the same mobile industry executives that insist on replacing perfectly functional firmware on handsets with something that's been badly scarred with network branding and had half of the most useful features removed?

        I hope you will forgive me if I don't value their opinion on what makes a good phone.

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        mum

        Everyone's mum has an iphone. Chavs, now watching less satellite TV, have iphones. I've also noticed on mainland europe, they seem popular among affluent retired gentleman.

        The people arguing on here and other forums are just a drop in the ocean. Anyway, I thought it was fashionable to use an old Nokia now?

  3. auburnman
    Facepalm

    6 - The Register won't stop talking about Apple

    Getting bored of reading the same comments from pro and anti Apple camps over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: 6 - The Register won't stop talking about Apple

      over

    2. Neill Mitchell

      over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...

      Like a monkey with a miniature cymbal.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...

        > a monkey with a miniature cymbal.

        Just the one? So what sound does this Zen monkey actually make...?

        1. Robert E A Harvey

          Re: over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...

          Just the one?

          Interesting point.

          Are a million one-cymbal monkeys louder than one one-cymbal monkey?

          1. Arctic fox
            Happy

            Re: "Are a million one-cymbal monkeys louder than one one-cymbal monkey?"

            Are we talking a ZenPhone here?

            1. Robert E A Harvey

              Are we talking a ZenPhone here?

              "existence is found in the silence", so a phone would be rather unecessary

          2. Chief sub

            Re: over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...

            Yes.

        2. Tom 11

          Re: over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...

          It depends if there's anyone to watch it fall.

        3. Charles 9 Silver badge
          Joke

          Re: over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...

          It makes a "cl-". It's obviously missing the one that makes the "-ang." Shame neither sound is possible unless they're both made at once.

        4. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...

          Master Joshu said to the student,

          "Go to the chippy down the road, my son, it opens in five minutes. Listen to the sound of the hot chips"

          And the student was enlightened.

          1. Figgus
            Coat

            Re: over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...

            There is entirely too much cymbalism in this thread.

        5. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: So what sound does this Zen monkey actually make

          A sort of stick-beating-cymbal kind of noise?

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: 6 - The Register won't stop talking about Apple

      > Getting bored of reading the same comments from pro and anti Apple camps

      Then don't read them and don't comment on them.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Here's another reason for the 'tards...

    No floppy drive!

    1. Giles Jones Gold badge

      Well it seems that the whole "Flash" argument has finally dissolved, who remembers all the fuss that used to generate on here.

      In fact, it's a limitation now, the iOS version of iPlayer lets you download lots of programmes to watch when you want (30 days to watch). The Android version still uses Flash, so you can only stream with a data connection, not much good abroad or on the plane.

      1. ArmanX
        Facepalm

        The iPlayer doesn't work as well on a non-iOS system?

        I'm shocked, simply shocked!

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: The iPlayer doesn't work as well on a non-iOS system?

          So you'd EXPECT a BBC application to work less well on a non Apple device? Personally I'm surprised - I'd have expected it to work as efficiently and usefully on all platforms that it's designed to run on.

          1. toadwarrior
            Trollface

            Re: The iPlayer doesn't work as well on a non-iOS system?

            You'd think that but given android is the work of communists and offer no way for honest hard working artists to secure their content so the thieves can't get at it, that means the BBC can't do anything until android allows someone other than one advertiser to make money on the platform.

      2. Unicornpiss Silver badge
        Flame

        Maybe, but...

        You can still put as much video, audio, etc. as you want on a removable SD card and watch it on your Android, then swap the battery with a fresh one when it becomes low due to watching all that media... And you can choose what player you want to use too.

        I deal with iPhones every day at work. They've become all the rage and our company is phasing out Blackberry devices. After the buzz wears off, our users find that hey, even their old, crappy Blackberry does email, calling, and texting better in an enterprise environment than their shiny new toy does. To say nothing of battery life.

        Seriously, the more iPhones I deal with, and the more Apple user accounts I have to set up, the happier I am with my Android device. Apple may "just work" (though often it doesn't), but Android just works better.

    2. Amorous Cowherder
      Happy

      No Wifi hotspot sharing!

      No ability to set up a shared Wifi Hotspot, that's reason I dropped my iPhone and went Android.

      Worked out great on holiday when I had my daughter and my wife, both Apple users and both desperate for a little net access. Oh dear, what to do. Well let me just flip this here toggle on my phone and voila, I'll let you both use my much derided ( in my house at least ) but now venerated Android phone with it's valuable wifi hotspot! They were both happily sponging off my Android SGS2 hotspot, both at the same time while I was browsing using my ASUS tablet.

      Apple tech is nice but I want my tech to do stuff not just look nice thanks!

      1. the-it-slayer
        Happy

        Re: No Wifi hotspot sharing!

        Huh? Course there is! Something called Personal Hotspot that's been there since the iP4 came out. And it works over Bluetooth/USB.

        Anyway, I'm sure the BBC made the clear cut decision from their usage stats to show that Apple devices hit iPlayer the most. Common sense says you update the iOS app first.

        Apple tech is very nice. Better than anything else IMHO :).

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: No Wifi hotspot sharing!

          "Anyway, I'm sure the BBC made the clear cut decision from their usage stats to show that Apple devices hit iPlayer the most. Common sense says you update the iOS app first."

          I suspect more people are likely to use a service when that service has been optimised for their hardware. Unless you can present these fictional stats though you're talking crap.

          It's long been suspected that the main reason the iPlayer better supports iOS than Android is because most of the Media Studies BA types who work for the beeb use iPhones.

      2. Aitor 1
        Thumb Down

        Re: No Wifi hotspot sharing!

        http://support.apple.com/kb/HT4517

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: No Wifi hotspot sharing!

          "Personal Hotspot requires a supporting hotspot tethering plan from your carrier. The maximum number of supported connections is five, but this number may vary depending on your carrier or iPhone model."

      3. Bill B

        Re: No Wifi hotspot sharing!

        I wish people who make these statements would check their facts. I find the wifi hotspot sharing on my iPhone very useful. Bit of a battery drainer though.

      4. PiccoloKu

        Re: No Wifi hotspot sharing!

        I use my iPhone to provide wifi to my tablet and laptop every day. What on earth are you talking about no ability to set up shared Wifi Hotspot? I can share with up to five different devices simultaneously. I'd say it's your service provider, cause it's definitely not the iPhone, providing it's an iPhone made within the last 3 years.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: No Wifi hotspot sharing!

          Well sadly if you're on scum O2 and you have monthly plan that started pre April 2011 you are not entitled to tethering in the contract, you have to change tariffs or pay extra for tethering option to be added before the phone will enable internet sharing!

    3. JEDIDIAH
      Linux

      The n00b mating call...

      ...you kid but in all likelihood I can probably attach a floppy drive to my phone.

      That's the difference between a platform that enables the end user and one that just puts up pointles barriers.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Reason for Apples success....

    ....to quote H.L. Mencken

    "No one in this world has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people."

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Pint

      Re: Reason for Apples success....

      Upvote for someone who knows Mencken.

      1. JimmyPage Silver badge
        Thumb Up

        Re: Reason for Apples success....

        Indeed ... I consider it a duty to quote Mencken as often as possible ...

        "The only good bureaucrat is one with a pistol at his head. Put it in his hand and it's good-bye to the Bill of Rights."

        "Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy"

        "Laws are no longer made by a rational process of public discussion; they are made by a process of blackmail and intimidation, and they are executed in the same manner."

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Reason for Apples success....

      Taken from the Frank Harris auto biography in the context of editing the "Evening news" newspaper. circa 1880. " No one ever sold a newspaper by overestimating the intelligence of the average reader." I'm not sure if the original wasn't Northcliffe.

  6. jai

    weird - of all the iPhones i've owned, i've never, ever, had a need to swap the battery.

    i dunno why you lot get so hung up on it as a feature.

    It used to be, before Apple came on the scene, that if you had a small pocket computer then you or anyone else could write programs for it and you could run them on your machine that you owned without asking the people who had made it.

    you know, you can get the SDK for free. you can write apps for yourself to your hearts content.

    1. Tom 11
      Facepalm

      Weird...

      Most iPhones I purchase for my company are replaced annually because of battery fails. They are also the devices that cause most crap because the sort of people that request them over Android are morons, and need baby sitting through every aspect of interfacing with a piece of technology.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Weird...

        Nice fairy tale the Tom 11.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Weird...

        I guess sort of people you mean are non-geeks? there's a whole bunch of people out there who really don't give a toss how things work, they don't care about ini files, registries or databases.

        Have you noticed most people just drive cars? they don't repair them or know how they work?

        Some people have hobbies like history, literature and so on. Their hobbies don't include computers and therefore they don't wish to know any more than the knowledge required to do a task.

        Try thinking outside of the 'geek' box once in a while.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Weird...

          "I guess sort of people you mean are non-geeks?"

          No, but simple people like yourself.

        2. Tom 11
          Mushroom

          Re: Weird...

          Yes AC, but they still seem to end up on here, a tech website, spouting their two penneth worth regardless....

          1. Bit Brain
            Joke

            “…their two penneth worth…”

            Brought to you by the Department for Redundancy Department.

        3. Charles 9 Silver badge

          Re: Weird...

          "Have you noticed most people just drive cars? they don't repair them or know how they work?"

          Shirley, no one's given a license to drive a car without being able to perform at least BASIC maintenance on it: learning how to check the oil, top off the basic fluids, knowing where the jack and the spare tire are in the boot (in case you get a flat in the middle of nowhere)? Similarly, there are things about electronics (or anything else) which should be considered "basic maintenance" and are considered part of the cost of having the device.

          1. kns2c

            Re: Weird...

            "Shirley, no one's given a license to drive a car without being able to perform at least BASIC maintenance on it"

            I hope you are being sarcastic. Obtaining a DL here in PA entails 1) answering test questions like "what is this octagonal sign with STOP on it?" 2) driving around a parking lot and maybe around a block if the DMV person is feeling adventurous, and 3) parking the vehicle in a school-bus-sized spot. If they started asking maintenance questions we would have a 90% failure rate and that would be bad for business. Same reason why there can't be any tests to qualify for owning a gun, let alone a computer or a phone.

        4. JEDIDIAH
          Linux

          Re: Weird...

          The "you must be a mechanic fallacy".

          You don't have to be a mechanic to benefit from the fact that the guy next to you can be one. The fact that you can be means that he can be and he can do all of the hard work for you.

          Although more than anything, a product that isn't "geek hostile" is likely to have more thought put into it. The demanding user will be considered. It doesn't have to be a "geek". It could just be someone that puts the product through it's paces. You can do that without being a "geek" or a "mechanic".

          Apple's "let's lower the bar" mentality is what led me to hack and jailbreak my iPhone. It should not have been necessary but it was. It was just a reflection of Apple ignoring the serious user. This made an iPhone more of a bother than an Android.

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Weird...

        "Weird...

        Most iPhones I purchase for my company are replaced annually because of battery fails. They are also the devices that cause most crap because the sort of people that request them over Android are morons, and need baby sitting through every aspect of interfacing with a piece of technology."

        E X A C T L E Y!!

        The oh so clever becuase I own an idiotPhone always need their hands held when talking about tech. The simplest of things, explained in the simplest of ways, for the simplest of people.

        Own an idiotPhone and be seen as an idiot! Can't put it simpler than that!

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Weird...

          "E X A C T L E Y!!"

          *facepalm*

          For someone who spends all his time pontificating about how everyone else is either an "idiot"* or "moron", you don't come across as the sharpest knife in the drawer.

          * Or occasionally "idoit", hilariously

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Weird...

            A mal-idoit ?

      4. Root Ginger

        Re: Weird...

        Haha, the batteries haven't failed they just want the latest iPhone and that's how they get one.

    2. Andy ORourke
      Happy

      Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

      Of all the PHONES i've owned, i've never, ever, had a need to swap the battery

      1. Captain Underpants

        Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

        @Andy

        I've never had to swap the battery during normal use, but I have replaced dead or dying batteries to keep the handset usable for another year or so. Seems tedious that Apple decided to remove the option.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

          If you believe the Fandroids on here then a phone becomes unusable after a year or two anyway because the screen is too small, it doesn't have 1GB of RAM or it doesn't have a quad core CPU.

          1. wowfood

            Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

            Yeah, fandroids are the ones who need to change their phone every year, oh wait no sorry my mistake, it's fanbois who need to have the latest iThing the day it comes out.

            "I can't believe it, I asked for a new iPhone and my *insert family member here* got me a 4 instead of 4s, I might as well slit my wrists right now"

            The only problem with androids are when you get the branded versions and the pre-installed crap from orange or *insert vendor here* and even then just root it and it's gone.

            That's the other point, jailbreak an iPhone you can install your own aps on there, but you're still on an iPhone 3. root a gingerbread handset and you can upgrade to ICS. Just because the company who made it doesn't give an update to your handset, doesn't mean you can't find one online you can install.

          2. Manu T

            Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

            "If you believe the Fandroids on here then a phone becomes unusable after a year or two anyway because the screen is too small, it doesn't have 1GB of RAM or it doesn't have a quad core CPU."

            Only the high end devices have these specs (which are in essence only 5 or 6 devices being sold). The majority are far less equipped. Android runs pretty well on these less equipped devices too.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

          Yeah, having had to replace the battery on my Macbook Pro recently, I have to say that the current gen retina models with the glued in batteries give me the yips, too.

        3. Lars Silver badge
          Pint

          Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

          I have replaced several batteries too, but I think it is possible to do it on the iphone too only you will pay for it at an apple shop. When sailing I have an extra battery and also an extra (old) phone and no apples.

      2. AndrueC Silver badge
        Thumb Down

        Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

        Swap, no. My colleague has nearly had to though because his Desire HD barely gets through the day on one charge. However I was glad I could upgrade to a 3aH batter on my Desire. It now lasts three, sometimes four days between charges.

        1. toadwarrior

          Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

          What does the desire HD have to do with anything? My lenovo get 5 hrs of battery life on a bulky oversize battery but that means nothing in terms of my mac which can get 10 hours battery life.

          Likewise judging ever phone based on one is stupid.

      3. Swarthy Silver badge

        Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

        Never needed to swap the battery, but I have had to do a battery-pull (extra) hard reset.

        If you can't pull the power, what do you do when it locks up tighter than a nun's nickers? I have had to to that for laptops, phones, and even PCs.

        1. Neil 8

          Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

          "What do you do when it locks up tighter than a nun's knickers?"

          Hold POWER+HOME until it powers off. Although this combo is detected by the OS if operational, after 10 seconds it's a hardware reset switch which cannot be prevented regardless of what's locked up. I imagine it's implemented this way *because* you can't just pull the battery.

          I've had to do this a few times to a jailbroken iPod Touch.

      4. toadwarrior

        Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

        I've never owned a second battery for a phone. Unless you work in the desert, it's not hard at all to top up a phone at some point in the day. It's even easier with USB leads being standard so you can charge up on PCs and not worry about being caught out using someone's power socket.

        A second battery seems like a waste of money unless you work in a remote place and happen to talk a lot or play games rather than working.

        1. hplasm Silver badge
          Devil

          Re: It's even easier with USB leads being standard

          Just like the iPhone!

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......

          "Unless you work in the desert, it's not hard at all to top up a phone at some point in the day. It's even easier with USB leads being standard so you can charge up on PCs and not worry about being caught out using someone's power socket."

          Or you could just carry the spare battery (you can get them for less than £10 btw) and not have to top up at all during the day. Seems easier than carrying a 1 metre USB lead + 30 pin adaptor + 3 pin mains adaptor and then having to hunt down a power socket you can use for free without getting into trouble.

        3. Frumious Bandersnatch Silver badge

          2nd battery (was Re: Jai, I agree but with this qualification......)

          A few years ago I was using a basic Nokia 6310 phone. I think that's the model number. Anyway, it had pretty good standby time for the most part--probably about 2.5 days. The big problem with it, though, was that if it went out of coverage it meant that it ramped up the power to the GSM radio so if I forgot to turn it off or keep it on charge during the day (we had very bad coverage where I worked), I'd have a flat phone by the end of the day. That's the first reason people want a replaceable battery--as a backup in case they get caught with a flat battery and no easy way to recharge once they notice it.

          The second reason is that batteries deteriorate over time. A three-year old phone won't last as long as the day you bought it. I agree totally with the article here--it does seem like a very cynical ploy by Apple to keep you on the upgrade cycle to the next shiny, when really all that's wrong with the 3-year old phone is that it needs a new battery.

    3. Steve the Cynic Silver badge

      Not exactly free - it would cost me the price of a Mac to run the development system on...

      1. Archibald Trumpetbeetle

        And the $99 dev account, otherwise you're just stuck

        with the emulator, unless you jailbreak the phone.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        @Steve

        Ahhh - I didn't realise that you could develop for android on the palm of your hand? No? What - you need to buy a computer for that too?

        Dumbass.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: @Steve

          Nope, there's an IDE that runs on Android, in fact.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      If you own a mac

      you can get the SDK for free. you can write apps for yourself to your hearts content. But a lot of people aren't willing to shell out over the odds for a mac as well as an iPhone, if I could write aps on my windows PC i'd be a happy bunny (technically I'm fairly sure there's a few ways I could, just expensive ways)

      But alas, despite the fact I have an iphone 3 hidden in a drawer somewhere (I always prefer testing applications on sub par hardware) I have no way of making the applications for them, without shelling out for it.

    5. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "you know, you can get the SDK for free. you can write apps for yourself to your hearts content."

      You know that you can't actually run them on the device without jailbreaking it or paying for a developer license, right?

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    2/10 for the effort, but I'll still put my pre-order in.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      1 idiotBadge coming up!

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        "1 idiotBadge coming up!"

        So named because it's coming FROM an idiot who can't even type properly!

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          ""1 idiotBadge coming up!"

          So named because it's coming FROM an idiot who can't even type properly!"

          AC == idiotPhone owner. Stop the crap and be man enough to stop hinding behind AC, otherwise your comments are just puffs of hot air!

  8. Tom 11

    Preaching to the wrong crowd...

    Lewis, we all know this already, (apart from the chumps who are pretending to be techies reading this on a fruit device convincing themselves how deluded we all are)

    Get this up on the BBC or in the metro or that stupid i paper from the Independant, might actually filter through a few indoctrinated brain cells...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Preaching to the wrong crowd...

      "...or in the metro or that stupid i paper from the Independant"

      Print is dead!

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Preaching to the wrong crowd...

        "Print is dead!"

        Well, in your world, it was never all that alive, I suspect. Not exactly Oscar Wilde, are you?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Preaching to the wrong crowd...

          I love how others get it, but you! ____________ ERM ____________

          Sharp as a tack eh?

      2. Bit Brain
        Thumb Up

        Re: Preaching to the wrong crowd...

        “Print is dead!”

        Thank you, Dr Spengler.

    2. AndyS

      Re: Preaching to the wrong crowd...

      3rd most read article on the BBC website just now (probably partly due to being on the front page of Reddit)

      http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-19557497

      Says much the same thing.

    3. Tom 11
      Trollface

      Re: Preaching to the wrong crowd...

      Sorry Lewis, I take it back, looks like you already greased a few palms at auntie ;)

      http://www.bbc.com/news/technology-19557497

  9. Nerd
    FAIL

    Just like the El Reg Staff then

    "As a commentator on the sci/tech/biz scene, unfortunately, he doesn't do so well. Sadly he has shown that he has only a very weak grasp - often none at all - on how various technological things actually work" Stephen Fry - just like the staff at the Register

    1. IglooDude

      Re: Just like the El Reg Staff then

      citation(s) needed

    2. Koyaanisq

      Re: Just like the El Reg Staff then

      Have you ever read an article on El Reg that taught you something? No? Are you a super genius perhaps?

      I didn't think so. Maybe you don't know anything about tech and the words just fly above your 'Nerd' head.

  10. Candy
    Happy

    Hilarious but...

    ...wasn't this supposed to go out as a Bong article?

  11. william 10
    Mushroom

    Hurry Hurry - get them quick before the possible ban !

    At least two companies are already working on court filings to get it banned as they claim apple copied them.

    If these companies are successful I wonder what the withdrawal symptoms will be like ?

    1. Koyaanisq

      Re: Hurry Hurry - get them quick before the possible ban !

      A doctor a day to keep the Apple withdrawal away.

    2. ArmanX
      Stop

      Re: Hurry Hurry - get them quick before the possible ban !

      It won't happen. Even if Apple broke into another company, stole their phone, copied it exactly, and began selling it as the iPhone X - all with full sound and video recording them - the iPhone wouldn't be banned from selling. Now, they may get in trouble, don't get me wrong - but they won't be banned. How else would the judge make phone calls?

  12. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Devil

    " As such Apple hysteria is hurting our economies and undermining one of the main things supporting our way of life."

    Oh well.

    Don't you think after the economy bubble, kept afloat by politicians and central banksters (the former with increasingly highly stained pants, the latter with increasingly large cars) via cheap credit and "bailouts", it's a bit late to complain?

  13. Kevin Johnston

    Tried not to get involved but

    The 2nd Number 2 bullet point (I presume it should have been Number 3?) is actually the one of most relevance. By not providing an SD or similar slot, Apple are extracting the Michael a tad. I am not aware of any other supplier (no I'm not going to go into Manufacturer vs Designer vs Supplier) who still plays that way and it is hard to see it as other than a way of controlling price for capacity and/or methods for transferring data.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Down

      Re: Tried not to get involved but

      " I am not aware of any other supplier (no I'm not going to go into Manufacturer vs Designer vs Supplier) who still plays that way"

      How about Google with the Galaxy Nexus phone and the Nexus 7 tablet. No SD card on either of them.

      It's also quite useless on newer phones like the Galaxy S3 since you can't actually move stuff like apps to the SD card.

      1. Monty Burns

        Re: Tried not to get involved but

        Atho....

        It's not often I use words like this but, what are you talking about you moron? It's perfect for quick file transfers and putting in one of the small library of cards containing which ever TV series you wish to switch to.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Tried not to get involved but

          ..or for your metric buttload of music (including a load of Metric, but no Butthole Surfers, in my case), and all the offline map data and other crap that I carry around.

          Hell, the multi-gig downloads from various games too. Most of the content on my phone is stored on the SD card. Not sure in what sane universe it's "useless".

        2. PiccoloKu

          Re: Tried not to get involved but

          You can put videos on an SD card and put the SD card in the Apple Camera Connection Kit and watch the videos from there. Do this all the time, but I use my iPad because watching a movie on a phone isn't that great, even with those dinner plate sized android phones.

      2. Manu T

        Re: Tried not to get involved but

        Yes, Google also fucks up

        1. Frumious Bandersnatch Silver badge

          Re: Tried not to get involved but

          Re: no SD on Neuxs or Nexus 7

          Yes, Google also fucks up

          The way I see it, the lack of an upgrade slot was a deliberate design decision to achieve two things. First, since they're basically subsidising the hardware, they want to keep costs down. Second, they don't want to piss off the other Android suppliers by making a phone or tablet that's too good (again, particularly if they're subsidising the cost). I'm only surmising this, but I feel that they want to produce something that's a pretty good showcase for Android, but want to avoid being accused of "stealing" the market from other Android makers. So I see the lack of an SD slot here as being kind of a middle ground, with the assumption that if users want to upgrade, they'll check out the other android manufacturers.

      3. arrbee

        Re: Tried not to get involved but

        This is the same argument as the closed garden one - if lots of people pay for crap from one company then there is every incentive for other companies in the same market to match them.

        Its this race to the bottom that perverts the capitalist rationale ( it also looks very like the "good enough" attitude that MS has always been roasted for ).

  14. Justice
    Thumb Up

    It's brilliant because it's true.

    Thank you for the mid-week smiley.

    Now... let the flame war begin!!!

    iSheep.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: It's brilliant because it's true.

      Only Androidiots like flame wars, they can't hold a reasonable argument.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: It's brilliant because it's true.

        "Re: It's brilliant because it's true.

        Only Androidiots like flame wars, they can't hold a reasonable argument."

        Your rantings suggest that and idotPhone user could?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: It's brilliant because it's true.

          Oh look another bonehead fandroid foaming at the mouth over this "article". How many comments have you posted here and on other Apple stories? 1000? Don't you have a life or something?

      2. FartingHippo
        Mushroom

        Re: It's brilliant because it's true.

        Pff. Everyone who isn't unhealthily pious and over-protective of their phone brand enjoys a good flame war.

        The more unreasonable the better :)

      3. Koyaanisq

        Re: It's brilliant because it's true.

        Aren't you a good example of fanboi cleverness.

        Also, I'm fairly sure it's 'Fandroid.'

      4. hplasm Silver badge
        Gimp

        Re: ...they can't hold a reasonable argument.

        But they can hold a phone any way they like...

  15. Drew Scott
    WTF?

    Point number 1 means I can't take this entire article seriously. What a load of link bait and pandering tosh.

  16. Gavin 8
    WTF?

    I was hoping to read some good reasons not to buy the iphone 5

    but got none :-/

    Oh well, I'll just have to mindlessly buy it. Especially as I don't want a memory slot, or a spare battery (4 days battery life from my iphone 4 will do me), and I'd happily be bummed by Stephen Fry.

    Also, do I want an android phone with poor battery life, poor ui, piss poor management of push data (no I don't want to configure each app to 'poll' every X minutes chewing up battery life), and even more piss poor touch response (but awesome custom keyboard options - I do miss that).

    Thing is, I don't need a pc in my pocket, I need a phone that can do a few extra things reliably (and of course condoms if I meet stephen fry).

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I was hoping to read some good reasons not to buy the iphone 5

      Do you know what you are talking about?

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    5 reasons for publishing this article

    1. Page impressions

    2. Page impressions

    3. etc...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: 5 reasons for publishing this article

      One word: adblock

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: 5 reasons for publishing this article

      You forgot:

      4. Profit

  18. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
    Happy

    People doing irrational things with money?

    Shocking

    Makes you wonder what fashion is all about

    1. arrbee

      Re: People doing irrational things with money?

      oo, I know the answer to that one.

      Fashion is about removing choice from the consumer.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    " It makes no sense that the iPhone (which is in many important respects less good than other smartphones) should command such an outrageous price premium among consumers"

    It gives the idiotPhone owner some status (you hear it from the 'tards all the time on 'ere).

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      IdiotPhone? Is that something out of Asus, like the PadFone?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        "IdiotPhone? Is that something out of Asus, like the PadFone?"

        No! I said idiotPhone. Like your not owned by one?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          IdiotPhone aka ObviouslyPhone!

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          "IdiotPhone? Is that something out of Asus, like the PadFone?"

          Another fine self-pwning.

        3. Steve Todd

          Someone throw a bucket of water over Obviously!

          before he spontaneously combusts. The excitement of getting a new Apple device to hate seems to be overwhelming him. In a month or so, when the excitement has worn off, he'll be back to his usual obnoxious self, providing today's excitement doesn't prove too much for him that is.

        4. Markl2011
          WTF?

          @Obvioisly!

          You do seem a little bit obsessed with Apple. The lady doth protest too much, methinks.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            "@Obvioisly!

            You do seem a little bit obsessed with Apple. The lady doth protest too much, methinks."

            The secret is out, i too am an idiotPhone user!

            (Oh and ladies, typos I'm not going to say sorry for. So What. I've not got the time to correct typographical errors when commenting to these retards. Any more "You cant spell/type shite, refer to this post, eh?)

  20. ElectricFox
    Trollface

    Hey Lewis,

    I want an iPhone 5 powered by a wind turbine! Then I'll never need to carry a spare battery....

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      For Lewis only Nuclear power will do.

      1. Badvok
        Joke

        Nuclear Power - me too please!

        With the Voyager probes demonstrating how well Nuclear batteries last, why can't we have this in phones?

        1. Simon Harris Silver badge

          Re: Nuclear Power - me too please!

          Voyager 1 may be 18.2 billion km away, but it still gets better reception than my Orange phone!

      2. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge
        Pint

        Preaching to the Converted .....

        Nine Circles Hi, ,..... re your comment posted Wednesday 12th September 2012 14:25 GMT ... For Lewis only Nuclear power will do. .... If you are new here, you may not already know that the Register has the inside track on NEUKlearer HyperRadioProActive IT. And much more powerfully in control with deep stealthy programs because so many find it so simply unbelievable.

        And that is as much as needs to be presently said on the matter.

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    How can you be so negative about the iPhone 5? When it supposed to have ground breaking features, such as the ability to bluetooth a file between 2 devices.

    I mean come on, that's 22nd century thinking today! (Brought to you by Nokia and others 10+ years ago!)

    I know there are a lot that have bad things to say about Apple, me too, but I do give credit for giving the phone industry a massive boot up the arse. The bar was raised by Apple with the iPhone, which was then copied & bettered by other companies.

    Henry Ford invented the modern car, but whilst they sell the 'worlds best selling model', I wouldn't say for a second they make the best cars in the world. After all, it's subjective. So if the iSheep want to follow the iHerd then iDon'tCare.

    1. JEDIDIAH
      Linux

      Ford and other nonense.

      > How can you be so negative about the iPhone 5? When it supposed to have ground breaking features, such as the ability to bluetooth a file between 2 devices.

      Been done already. They even have ads for this everywhere and even at the movies. Are you a shut-in or something?

      > Henry Ford invented the modern car

      Even Ford didn't claim that.

  22. Waspy
    Megaphone

    Meanwhile, later on today:

    "OMFG, LIKE APPLE TOTALLY INVENTED THE 4" SCREEN AND THIS REALLY COOL TRANSFER THING CALLED NFC"

    Sorry, couldn't resist.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    G'day, Bruce.

    *australian accent from Monty Python's Australian philosophy department sketch*

    Point 3: There is no Point 3.

  24. Aaron Em
    Pint

    God bless you, Mr. Page!

    You've delivered a good hard laugh, when I really did need one. Thank you! Next round's on me -- you've got the email address to which to send the pub slip and remittance instructions.

  25. mike acker
    Pirate

    iDIOT pHONE

    iDIOT pHONE

    who needs one?

  26. GotThumbs
    Boffin

    Amen to that.

    It's been as plain as the nose on your faces, but still thousands flock like sheep to the slaughter.

    It would be funny to watch if companies like JP Morgan didn't provide justification for Cult members to buy yet again...another generation of Apples single phone.

    Gladly watching from the sidelines..

    -Android OS Phone and only paying $30mo for Cell, Text, and data.

  27. Smelly Socks
    Unhappy

    h8r.

    that is all.

    -ss

    1. Bit Brain
      Facepalm

      Are you 12 years old or something?

  28. badger31

    Points 2 and 2 ...

    Anyone who needs a replaceable battery and an SD card that buys an iPhone is, obviously, a tit. For everyone else, it's still a valid choice of phone. This includes me - my iPhone 4 fits my needs very well, and my old iPhone 3G is still going strong in the hands of my wee brother. The reason I won't be buying the iPhone 5 is:

    6. Facebook integration

    The very thought makes my skin crawl, but I guess loads of people are gonna love it.

    1. Ramiro

      Re: Points 2 and 2 ...

      I'm going to root my android phone pretty much just to remove the built-in facebook app, whose very existence annoys me. While I'm a it, though, there's a load of rubbish that'll hit the bin too, but I really wouldn't bother to go the trouble were it not for facebook.

  29. Tom 38 Silver badge
    Alert

    If Apple stopped making phones

    What would Obviously! do all day?

    This is his "GO TIME". He's been prepping for weeks for the non stop rush of comments he needs to post about iphones, and why no-one cares about them. He really doesn't care about them, which is why he posts every 3rd comment in an iphone discussion.

    I've given up worrying about which phone is best, but watching some self destruct in indignation at the launch of a phone he doesn't like is comedy goldmine, if a little callous.

    1. Toothpick
      Pint

      Re: If Apple stopped making phones

      "What would Obviously! do all day?"

      Day 1 - take down all the Steve Jobs & Tim Cook posters from his bedroom wall.

      Day 2 - search for another manufacturer to attack when a story is released on here.

      Day 3 - look for up and coming stories about said manufacturer.

      Day 4 - get the 'comments' ready using the usual recipe of verbal diarrhoea and bad spelling.

      Day 5 - getting excited now. Can't sleep because tomorrow the story will hit.

      Day 6 - GO GO GO.

      Day 7 - Rest. Got to get an early night as it's school tomorrow.

  30. El Presidente
    Windows

    Anyone who buys into the Apple ecosystem

    is clearly an iDiot

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Anyone who buys into the Android ecosystem

      Androidiots are just copycat idiots on steroids. (On Andro as the name suggests.)

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Anyone who buys into the Android ecosystem

        Absolutely! Because you get what you pay for!

  31. robin thakur 1
    WTF?

    I'm sorry but this is nonsense...

    You and the BBC seem to feel the need to jump on the anti-Apple bandwagon over stupid reasons, but I'm probably going to get the 5 when it is out, having recently owned a Galaxy 3 and an HTC One X and gone back to the 4S after the wow factor died. Why? At the end of the day, beyond the razzmataz of large screens and a notionally superior OS, consistant ease of use and stability, battery life, plus choice of Apps and the ever-present environental lock in brought me back to the iPhone.

    Take something as simple as Music. It's a right pain on Android. For the Galaxy 3, I tried Kies, DoubleTwist, iSyncr and a couple of others and none of them were reliable or fully featured alternatives to 'awful' iTunes. Some didnt work with ICS, others you had to pay for and some you had to buy the wifi sync functionality seperately, others still (I'm looking at you Kies) lock the phone during mass storage mode transfers so you can't answer calls or texts. Great. Once tracks are on the device, you have to unlock it to control music playback (no notification centre on lock screen for me on an Exchange server), no doubletapping of the flimsy home button to bring up a music player. My headphone remote, doesn't work with triple tap to go back a track, it's just an exercise in making life much harder than it needs to be. I googled for weeks, went on forums, assuming i'd missed something obvious, but there is no easy way to do it assuming you aren't just dragging and dropping a small number of tracks and a playlist into one folder (as in, what we used to do back in the year 2000)

    Every other person I know who purchased a SGS3 I've asked about the subject has sort of given me a strange knowing look and admitted that they had to ask more technical friends for assistance in doing the same task and eventually resorted to carrying an iPod (or even in one case their old iPhone) around as well for music playback. Many found it mind boggling that I as an IT person (SharePoint Admin and developer) couldn't work out how to do it. I could work out how to reflash the rom on the phone fine, but when it came to music I had to admit defeat, and the phone went to Gumtree heaven never to be seen again. My point is that yes it is supremely customisable, but if it still doesn't do what you want, what then? Fork Android and develop your own version?!? Possibly, but not everyody has that sort of time...The Galaxy 3 is full of gimmicks that nobody will ever use or flat out just don't work reliably like the motion controls, Photoshare, Smart stay, S Assist, and I could go on. The build quality likewise disappoints (HTC better on this front, as it their screen)

    In short, it's easy to take the iPhone for granted, but I will be sticking with what works thanks.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I'm sorry but this is nonsense...

      Seriously? music transfer was a problem? firstly Kies does a good job, it links fine with WMP, but alternatively just copy files! it is much faster and simpler than iTunes...

      I get that if your used to iTunes anything that requires thought is hard...

      There are 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't...

      1. JEDIDIAH
        Linux

        Re: I'm sorry but this is nonsense...

        What's to have trouble with? Just put your Music anywhere on the device and it will get sorted. This is 2012. Our phones are more powerful than the first machines that ran iTunes. The idea that you need some gatekeeper software on your PC is just outdated.

        iTunes should be running on the phone.

    2. This post has been deleted by its author

    3. Jaques Croissant

      Re: I'm sorry but this is nonsense...

      Then your friends are a bit thick. It took me precisely two minutes of googling, after getting my first Android phone to work out how to sync my music from iTunes to it, by using iSyncr. All my Android and iOS devices sync painlessly against the same iTunes install, though I do customise the lists for each, depending on how much storage space each has free for tunes.

      In short, it's easy to take above room-temperature IQ for granted, but I will be sticking with what works thanks.

  32. Dana W
    Meh

    We have a saying on Reddit about this sort of thing.

    "Troll or just stupid?"

    http://i.qkme.me/eb6.jpg

  33. pewpie
    Thumb Up

    What a fantastic sub-title.

  34. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

    BAe phone

    Lewis has obviously been hired to promote the new BAe-Thales-vickers-EADS euroPhone.

    Weighing in at a mere 117 euro-Kg and with a wrist mounted keypad that weighs a mere 20kg - the phone will include an internet app to strengthen the right wrist.

    Although the first generation isn't capable of making or receiving calls until the new PhoneUser2000 specifications are finally agreed. Internet connectivity is available with the optional add-on module (specially reinforced Landrover required)

    It will have user interchangeable batteries and the UK govt has ordered 5 sets of the batteries to be distributed among all UK users.

    Unit costs is a mere million quid but subsidies will be available to qualified users (qualification include owning an oil rich country)

    1. dogged
      FAIL

      Re: BAe phone

      Oh please.

      You know very well that Lewis usually decries Euro-projects in favour of buying something that works and is cheaper (often from the US).

  35. Hagglefoot

    Not an Iphan, yeah Siri you heard me

    Much like the current economy perhaps its time to end the hope and pray status of telephony services. Its a bit like a sports car with all the wheel nuts cross threaded because the journey is always in a hurry. Sooner or later the wheels are going to fall off.

    And as much is true of the iphone generally it looks good, feels solid and the doors close just like a vw golf, but then you get to the offerings or add ons my one particular favorite being Siri for which even and with the Iphone 5 I dont believe we will get past the' I'm sorry but but I can only look for businesses in the USA' so please explain why I should need to pay over the odds for something that I cant use.

    I suspect therefore that other than the USA the google maps replacement service will pretty much show the rest of the world as a barren desert.

    Also given that a lot of the word on the street is that IOS6 has been heavily developed to capitalise on the Chinese language. Then I beg to consider why do I need that much overhead on my meager little offering of a phone.

    Perhaps when Apple considers the rest of the world as more of a customer and less of an idiot revenue stream who are so mentally displaced with the latest music offering to be able to think straight. Then it might be worth a punt on the next iphone otherwise for now I remain in the fool me once shame on me set.

  36. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge

    Setting the record straight, for Lewis would surely not wish to be wilfully wrong.

    Taking technology advice from someone like Stephen Fry is like making decisions by rolling dice or consulting a witch-doctor. Capitalism and democracy, systems which allow important choices to be made by many people rather than just a few, cannot function if this sort of behaviour becomes too widespread. .... Lewis Page ..... living in a fantasy world if he thinks capitalism and democracy are functional phorms of important operation rather than self-serving arrangements for the milking of cash and bilking of phantom power, as is explained succinctly here in all of 2minutes 45seconds ...... This is a British Democracy

    And who will deny the information and intelligence shared in those few minutes is not perfectly true and currently valid?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Setting the record straight, for Lewis would surely not wish to be wilfully wrong.

      Shut up and go away.

  37. Piro
    Pint

    Ahh yes, this should stoke some more people

    Always good for a laugh.

  38. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    heh I think I'll get one now.

  39. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "massive irrational behaviour"

    "- it's money being spent and invested in ways which are against the decision-makers' interests"

    Surely the majority of western industry depends on exactly this behaviour, from fashion and cosmetics to junk food, vitamin pills and throwaway Christmas novelties?

  40. W. Anderson
    Unhappy

    Apple - iPhones and Capitalism

    The article writer is correct in the logic, or " illogic" of reasons for purchase and actual purchase and use of an Apple iPhone. I disagree entirely as to the 'negative' effects on capitalism and damage to Democracy.

    I firmly believe that the 'freedom' possessed by citizens to make really terrible decisions in regard commerce is healthy, as those persons that are not simpletons will (hopefully) realize that clear and better thinking and actions are needed.

    If the proportion of naivete and ignorance remains high amoung the populace, then unfortunately no amount of forced direction - to buy/not buy Apple products will make a positive difference. The society in which such levels of stupidity remain prevalent is doomed.

    Hope it is not where I live!

  41. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hrm

    While there is some wonderful mischief being perpetrated by people just poking the tard nest to get a rise out of them, there seems to be a depressing quantity of people whose entire self-image depends on the brain of mobile phone they choose.. that seems lamentable and the sign of a very insecure and empty person.

    Thus I am amusing myself by downvoting any foaming platformtard on either side, as they deserve it, and add nothing to life's rich wossname. I'm also downvoting "Obviously!" as he appears to be a waste of chromosomes, whatever the topic- being an incoherent, ill-informed gobshite on absolutely any topic you care to mention.

    Meantime, shame on you, Lewis, you know the levels of rage would go into the red, go and stand in the corner :)

    1. GuyC
      Thumb Down

      Re: Hrm

      and I'm downvoting you for managing not to antagonise either side in this amusing tale....shame on you, try a little harder

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Hrm

        GuyC,

        Apologies.. umm.. not feeling the 'zerker rage today.. One sec..

        YOUR WIFE IS A BIG HIPPO! YOUR HAIR IS SILLY! YOU LOOK LIKE CHEESES?

        Is that any better?

  42. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Ok that's the obligatory "I will not buy an iPhone" in preparation for the 10 other articles about the iPhone that are coming.

  43. Antoinette Lacroix
    Paris Hilton

    Earlier today

    I saw 3 girls, which were walking side by side. All of them were staring at their phone screens. Eventually, the one in the middle walked against a lamp post. Imho every smartphome makes you look less smart than you would without one.

    I'll stick to my V3i.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Earlier today

      I also once saw a drunk bellend fall off a bike, so we probably need to replace them all with dodgems, I expect.

    2. Aaron Em

      Same would've happened with a paperback

      although I will grant no one these days has the patience, or the brain-cells to rub together, to do anything with a paperback. I mean, it doesn't even light up!

  44. Pet Peeve
    FAIL

    LAME

    Linkbait, really?

  45. ukgnome Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    Oh sweet Jesus

    What is this new experience?

    Surely not, no it can't be.

    erm I agree with Lewis Page

    There I said it - now where is the nearest strong drink

  46. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    And what do people do when they are told not to do something...

    1. Kevin Johnston

      Obviously

      they stick dried peas up their nose

  47. Peter Scott

    And on and on

    Got both Apple and HTC Android phones in the family. I can only speak from personal experience.

    The HTC Android phone is a nightmare to use, the soft keyboard selects letters either side of the one you want, it's slow and often unresponsive.

    The iPhone, wel it just works.

    I spend enough time during the day dicking round with computers and don't want to have to root my phone to install some app or other, I want it to just work. I don't want to spend my time dicking round getting some app or other to run on my phone.

    So where next, my daughter wants a new phone soon, it certainly won't be Android after my bad experience there, it won't be an iPhone because some prat at school might nick it. Perhaps her choice of a Blackberry is not so insane, or there's even an outside chance of a Win phone, not the first choice of anyone who likes me works with Unix and Linux.

    For me, I will just stick with what works, make my calls, read my mail, listen to my music and podcasts and stick to my iPhone.

    1. JEDIDIAH
      Linux

      Re: And on and on

      > Got both Apple and HTC Android phones in the family. I can only speak from personal experience.

      About 5 minutes after getting her hands on a Galaxy Tab 2 the missus dumped her iPad and her iPhone.

      Got tired of waiting for the iPhone5 and got an GS3 instead. Likes it better than the iPhone. Not bothered by any of the usual bogeyman that fanboys tend to bring up in their usual attempts to engage in fear mongering.

  48. Haku

    Serious question: How long will the iPhone last for?

    Before the days of smartphones, with most mobile phones you may see only a few different revisions/versions created (if that, there are so many 1-off's) before the manufacturer decides to bring out a new phone with a completely new design, yet the iPhone is on it's 6th incarnation of a small oblong block with a touchscreen.

    How long will the iPhone as we know it last for?

    Until someone creates a smartphone that makes it look like a toy? or when mobile phones as we know them evolve into something beyond an oblong block with a touchscreen, like Project Glass from Google or built into your clothing for example?

  49. Richard 20
    Thumb Up

    Quality Trolling Lewis…

    That is all.

  50. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Remember when kids wore jeans?

    Then parents and Tony Blair wore jeans them and kids went off jeans, because now everyone was wearing them even their parents!

    That’s the problem with iPhones everyone has them and they are no longer exclusive, they are just very common.

    Yep - Apple have become the thing they thought they wouldn’t be passé'

  51. disgruntled yank Silver badge

    "Taking technology advice from someone like Stephen Fry is like making decisions by rolling dice or consulting a witch-doctor. Capitalism and democracy, systems which allow important choices to be made by many people rather than just a few, cannot function if this sort of behaviour becomes too widespread."

    Don't watch many commercials, do you? Or, for example, actresses testifying on the effects of pesticides before US congressional committees.

  52. E 2

    Cart before the horse

    Democracy is a prerequisite for a functioning capitalist economy.

    Capitalism is not a prereq for democracy.

    1. DiViDeD Silver badge
      Windows

      Re: Cart before the horse

      Oh I don't know - US Capitalism worked pretty well in places like Venezuela before democracy. US companies don't seem to be faring so well down there these days.

      Just saying. Democracy no more implies capitalism than Capitalism implies Democracy (or even common decency)

    2. dogged
      Thumb Down

      Re: Cart before the horse

      Hong Kong.

      Your move.

  53. DiBosco

    The best reason for not buying an iPhone

    The best reason, to me, for not buying an iPhone is that Apple are a company of very low morals and a desire to lock you in at all costs. The ding-dongs between fanboys of Apple and the anti-apple brigade largely avoid this hugely important point. Mostly they focus on FUD (or should that be outright lies) about how HTC Desire's keys don't work well or how hard it is to transfer music. The examples of non-replaceable batteries and no SD cards *are* important because they are the embodiment of how Apple are a company of lock-in and a lack of desire to conform to standards. The comment about charging via USB was quite amusing because even that is non-standard with Apple gear, you have to have a special lead, not a micro-USB cable.

    Having said all this, it won't stop Apple fans buying Apple because it is a status symbol. Apple didn't invent the smart phone, they don't make the best smart phone any more by any method of measuring it (if people are honest), but they are cool. Apple are, or at least were, genius at marketing. It's probably like Armani, Hillfiger or other clothes brands: they aren't any better than many other cheaper clothes, but they have the cool brand name.

    The Apple fans who claim Android are copying Apple are talking utter nonsense and they need to learn more about the short history of these devices. Apple were the first to market these phones correctly and, in all fairness, they probably, at first, engineered them better than predecessors. They now look clunky and outdated,

    All this won't stop the purile exchanges here and other web sites though.

  54. Peter Snow
    Linux

    iphone is a fashion product

    I believe the hysteria surrounding the iphone and the reason for it's popularity are probably due to it becoming a fashion accessory.

    I notice that iphone users who send emails from their phones (like blackberry users), nearly always add, "Sent from my iphone" to the bottom of their emails? Is that so that we are more forgiving about the nonsense contained in the message or as an attempt to feed their low ego's?

    I also send emails from my Nokia E72, but I rarely ever inform the recipient that I'm doing so.

    Fashion accessories often achieve market prices above the measurable value of the item being marketed and it would appear that this might be the explanation for the unreasonable price of the iphone (oh, and of course due to the fact that simpletons are like sheep!).

    1. PiccoloKu

      Re: iphone is a fashion product

      The iPhone puts "sent from my iPhone" at the bottom of every email like a signature. You can change it, but who really cares. If that's a big gripe then you have more problems than emerging tech products. SMH

  55. John Savard Silver badge

    One Fact Forgotten

    While it is true that not having a flash card slot and a replaceable battery, like even the cheapest tablets and phones from other companies mean that I wouldn't be likely to ever spend the kind of money an Apple phone costs on an Apple phone... one very important thing was forgotten in this article.

    Apple invented all the basic elements of the multitouch interface! Hence, if you buy any competing product, as the recent U.S. court decision against Samsung proved, you're undermining the patent system and destroying innovation!

    So it's a choice between destroying the free market system (rational markets) by buying Apple, or destroying the free market system (intellectual property rights) buy buying anything else! You can't win, we're all doomed.

    1. JEDIDIAH
      Linux

      Re: One Fact Forgotten

      Destroying the US Patent system? Load me up on "knockoffs".

      Your propaganda about Apple's bad patents are why the whole system needs to be burned down. It's like a house infested with black mold. It's better to nuke it from orbit. It's already too far gone.

      Idiots like you should be forced to use MS-DOS.

    2. dogged
      WTF?

      Re: One Fact Forgotten

      and the HTC touch never existed.

      Right?

  56. Urh
    Coat

    I'm kinda surprised...

    ...that no mention was made of Apple arbitrarily changing the connector on the iPhone 5, or why Apple has never used standard connectors like everybody else other than to make sure people come crawling back to Cupertino for replacement cables.

  57. john 19
    Linux

    No drag and drop music uploading

    I will add a sixth reason

    No drag and drop music uploading. You need to sync using itunes. This is another deal breaker for a lot of people. Not to mention that there is no itunes for Linux..

    1. RICHTO Silver badge
      Mushroom

      Re: No drag and drop music uploading

      Only 1% of people care about Linux. Not exactly even close to being on the radar.

      1. john 19

        Re: No drag and drop music uploading

        Sure, but still, forcing you to sync through itunes is a big annoyance for a lot of people. Drag and drop is trivial to implement and It is only a business decision not to allow it.

  58. NHS IT guy
    Facepalm

    Very good

    Enjoyable post, however I enjoy the simplicity of iOS, and the elegant design of the iPhone (I have a Lumia 800 for work btw).

    I'm pretty sure upgrading to the iPhone 5 isn't going to bring around the end of civilisation ;)

  59. Lozsta
    Trollface

    Ah iPhone have lost me finally. I waited and waited for this new iPhone and finally it is here and there is nothing to make me want it. "5 icon rows" my gosh they need to get their shit together.

    Samsungs functionality is simply better. The ability to just copy files to the device wins it for me

  60. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Abba

    How did the Swedes cope with Abba making up a large portion of their GDP? If their society didn't collapse with a larger percentage of their GDP being made up of pop culture, then I doubt Apple will have any affect on the greed based system that is already hurtling my country off the cliff. We just haven't hit the bottom yet.

  61. Sir Lancelot
    Mushroom

    A bit bored

    Meanwhile in Fukushima...

  62. origin2000
    FAIL

    Envy, much?

    Seems like the author of this article just regrets his choice of buying a Samsung, RIM, or other non-Apple smartphone. Frankly, many of the reasons listed as why you SHOULDN'T get the iPhone are compelling reasons why many have bought the iPhone and will continue to do so - at least until Apple makes a misstep or someone comes out with a truly compelling alternative. The iDevice ecosystem has brought prosperity to mobile carriers, accessory manufacturers, car-makers, app developers, and frankly, users - since day one. No other phone or mobile platform offers the range of diverse choices so eschewed by this article. Android? Blackberry? Symbian? Windows Mobile? Give you head a shake, man. How many 3rd party cases are available for the newest Nokia, HTC or Motorola phones? How many of those phones allow you to easily manage and sync your content between devices and your PC? How often do those phone models have crippling deficiencies and ridiculous omissions because of the retarded demands of the mobile carrier "partner" that's actually selling the phone? Apple is also the one phone manufacturer that provides timely operating system updates to phones more than 2 days old - not 3-6 months after general availability - the same day. The iPhone is number 1 for a reason. Frankly, I have a hard time recognizing this article as anything but a piece of fiction by a journalist who has to invent a non-existent problem in order to not seem like a "fanboi".

  63. bullgtor

    Completely Agree

    I had the urge to thoughtlessly go purchase one simply because I can easily afford it and have an impulse to own the latest. Thank you for your article. I agree and certainly have changed my mind. It is time everyone start giving thought to the big picture, especially in this world's economy.

  64. Steve T
    Thumb Down

    not only, but also...

    The article forget to mention the absurdity of producing a device that is supposed to be portable and which will inevitably be dropped whilst being slid in and out of pockets with the thinest most breakable glass screen of any device ever released, and then failing to provide any repair service but demanding £130 to provide a complete new unit when any breakage occurs.

    The article also forget to mention the total abandonment of the service concept by a retail company that asks people who visit their shops if they have made an apointment!

    The article also forget to mention the arrogance of a retail company that gives the title of "genius" to the spotty oiks that man their shops, thus making sure that said oiks are more obnoxious than any normal shop sales assistant, which is of course what they really are.

  65. Zed Zee

    " In a proper smartphone, if you need more storage you can buy it and slot it in yourself. "

    Incorrect! Even Google and Sony are at it now; both the Nexus 7 tablet and Sony's latest Xperia NXT Series DO NOT have SD card slots either, so it's worse than people think.

    There's an underlying 'conspiracy' here, started by Apple, but now seems to be perpetuated by the Android brands as well, which is undermining the whole freedom idea that goes hand-in-hand with open source.

  66. Ian 55
    Paris Hilton

    I should have posted this when there were only a couple of comments, but...

    Applause.

    Buying an iPhone involves bending over, and pointing your bottom towards Apple.

    Now, yes, being on the receiving end can be very nice, and yes, Microsoft can be just as guilty of this, and yes, Apple uses lots of high quality shiny lube (think Liquid Silk) rather than Microsoft's 'Vaseline with sand in', but...

    ... you're still being f*cked if you buy one.

    (Paris, because we've all seen her taking it, haven't we?)

    1. Mephistro Silver badge
      Devil

      Re: I should have posted this when there were only a couple of comments, but...

      " rather than Microsoft's 'Vaseline with sand in',"

      Wrong! Microsoft has always used Super Glue. The sand-like sensation appears when the stuff begins to crystallize.

  67. Chief sub

    is The Reg site the only one in the universe where the old 90s Windows/Apple war still rages?

    Just wondering.

  68. Lloyd

    I started reading it

    And then looked up to see who'd written it as I was grinning at the sheer trolling nature of the article and surprise, surprise, it was Lewis. I'm now starting to admire him, he's somehow managing to make a living writing articles that troll on divisive subject matter. Keep going mate, it's fun to watch.

  69. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Who invented the expression "walled garden"?

    And who today won't relate it to Apple?

    Enough said.

  70. Simon B
    Thumb Up

    All hail Lewis Page! my thoughts on the iphone precisely :)

  71. Eponymous Howard
    Trollface

    Oh Lewis,

    You really are a card.

  72. schen
    Happy

    you just sound like a jealous apple hater when you write this kind of stuff. if anyone is doing a disservice to society, it's you; producing garbage articles that provide no benefit but to show just how dumb you really are. what phone do you use that's so great?! for the record i'm an android user.

  73. madiq
    FAIL

    "Many, many people don't think like me, but they're happy. Waa waa waa."

    It's incredible the lengths that Mr. Page is willing to go to discredit people who don't exactly have his priorities, and are perfectly happy with their purchases.

    Here are some irrefutable facts: the iPhone is successful by any economic or market share indicator. It is incredibly popular. It is highly coveted by many despite its high cost of ownership. One must be forced to admit that success at this scale cannot be driven solely by fashion. Surely five years is enough for people to get bored of the same old fad that continues to disappoint year after year.

    To most observers, there is a very simple explanation for this success: PEOPLE LIKE THE iPHONE. They LOVE it. Far from being irrational consumers, people buy every new iteration of the iPhone because the last one they bought gave them lots of utility and pleasure. These repeat customers aren't sheep. They are looking for a replay of last year's rush of satisfaction by buying an updated product from the same manufacturer. There is nothing irrational about it.

    Mr. Page's article tells me more about the irrationality of Mr. Page himself, who apparently thinks it absolutely inconceivable that a device that is built on priorities that are not his own could be so successful. Why, the thing is simply built WRONG, and it should NEVER succeed! The indisputable fact that it is wildly successful is absolutely UNFAIR! Those customers HAVE to be irrational—there can simply be no other explanation for it!

  74. Steveo119
    Happy

    Meh

    I've had quite a few friends and family go back to iPhone due to some problem or other with their androids, my pal Jamie had to put his s2 galaxy back 5 times due to technical issues. I guess not everyone's a full on techie.

    Never had to replace A battery on any iPhone, the only problem I have with them is that the screens crack really easily :(

    I actually quite like the S3 galaxy, But I'm weighing up if I will upgrade to an iPhone 5 or go for something alien.

    Not so much ISheep, more like sticking to what I know. ;)

    1. PiccoloKu

      Re: Meh

      If you think the iPhone screen breaks easily, beware of your Samsung Galaxy 3, whose screen breaks when dropped from a height of literally a few centimeters. It's a beautiful screen, but more brittle than the bones of an 80 year old woman with osteoporosis.

  75. Sander van der Wal
    Thumb Down

    It used to be 70%-30%

    with 70% for Handango and 30% for the developer of an app. Before the App Store.

  76. John A Blackley

    Wow!

    I must not read Lewis Page enough. This is the first time I've ever seen an entire article that's a troll.

  77. iphone 4s

    Will you order iPhone 5

    Should you buy iPhone 5? My suggestion is that u needn’t upgrade iPhone 4S to iPhone 5. But you may try iPhone 5 suppose you haven’t owned any apple product. After all, Apple never lets us down for its unique products.

    Anyway, if you want to experience the enjoyment about watching movies on iPhone 5 with a bigger touch screen, you’d better care for iPhone 5 supported formats.

    Video Formats supported by iPhone 5

    a) H.264 video up to 1080p, 30 frames per second, High Profile level 4.1 with AAC-LC audio up to 160 Kbps, 48kHz, stereo audio in .m4v, .mp4, and .mov file formats

    b) MPEG-4 video up to 2.5 Mbps, 640 by 480 pixels, 30 frames per second, Simple Profile with AAC-LC audio up to 160 Kbps per channel, 48kHz, stereo audio in .m4v, .mp4, and .mov file formats

    c) Motion JPEG (M-JPEG) up to 35 Mbps, 1280 by 720 pixels, 30 frames per second, audio in ulaw, PCM stereo audio in .avi file format

    Since not all the videos can be playback on iPhone 5, here we recommend a free iPhone 5 video converter to make it possible to play any movies on iPhone 5. It is VidPie, totally free video transcoding software for windows users and meets any conversion demands from mp4, mov, mts, mxf, avi, etc to any other formats.

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