There is still something to be said for the simplicity of a phone that only makes calls.
That would be pure, without the distractions of everything else.
You think phones are for making calls? No longer, if a poll conducted by O2 is anything to go by. Talking to people is not even in the top three activities folk spend most time doing on their handsets. Top of the list, with a daily usage time of 24.81 minutes, is web browsing. Social networking comes in at number two; 17.49 …
It doesn't give interesting enough stats, why not include the obvious
50% of people are smart arses - When asked "What do you use your phone for" 1/2 of respondents replied Duh, Making calls
25% of people are idiots - 1/4 of respondents admitted they carry it to look good, but haven't sussed turning the damn thing on.
25% of people have no friends - 1/4 of respondents said they'd never received a call on their phone
10% can't write - 1/10th of respondents submitted answers in txt spk.
not a laptop but a palm top so call it a pop or patop or plop or poop
mobile device so call it a mice or mobice or mobe
everybody thinks they need one ('cause everyone else has one), they are sheep, therefore call it baa-baa
large corporations are robbing us blind, therefore call it crap
all above ideas are copywrited, El Reg may use with approval
Presumably you also mock those with running water and toilets as 'sheep', unable to resist the latest idiots' fad? Everyone else has them, so everyone else thinks they need them! What possible ise have they, anyway?
My shit doesn't stink; what do I need a toilet for?
And don't even mention electricity! Damnable large corporations and their charging for every last watt-hour we use! Ripping us off, and for what? Some worthless affectation we only use to look good for the neightbors! I mean, why else would -everyone- be using it, when we know most people are fools?
"Handy". I've also heard "Smartie". Both of these seem a bit infantile.
Increasingly my kids refer to tablets and phones - at least the ones that can't be called iPads, iPhones, or Blackberrys - as 'droids, which sounds a little better to my ears. But I think El Reg got there first with 'Slab'.
I'll carry on calling mine a mobile.
Mobile phone. Sometimes
Mobile game console. Every day.
Mobile browser. Oh yes.
It took 8 months to receive the 1st call on my first mobile, 11 before I made a call. Sent hundreds of texts along the way. It actually did more service as an alarm clock/watch than a phone. Current smartphone averages less than 5min/month. Sometimes zero. Email wiped out my phone use long before mobiles became popular and nothings really changed, don't even clock up more than 15min of the fixed line in a busy month.
>> Any suggestions for a more appropriate moniker, folks?
I'm fine with "fondleslab". "Mobile" will do. I won't strain your censors with my suggestions. I've been waiting for a long time for some marketing genius to come out with a mobile . . . "telephone".
Important niche market that. Just as a lot of businesses--well, all of them--depend on, and spend lots of money on, computer functionality that requires a keyboard and a large screen, they also rely a lot on voice communications. You know, businesses--the same market that supports a little company called IBM.
As the article says, voice calls are falling down the list. What it doesn't say is that daily mobile voice calls doubled in volume between 2005 and 2010, and to judge by the overly exact numbers quoted from O2 appear to be steady now at 12-13 minutes a day.
The reality is that modern phones do more than older ones, and unremarkably people use those capabilities. So (despite the abhorrence of some of the commentards) Joe Public is getting more out of the device they carry. Admittedly there's a trade off particularly in battery life, but that's a choice you make.
For those piteous voices demanding basic, functionality-free voice phones, there's more than a few on sale, so help yourselves. Maybe the Alcatel 209 fits the bill? A bit fancy for you, what with its FM radio, and the heroic "fake call" button, but no camera, no internet etc.
I was going to suggest Communicator, or comm for short.
However, I agree "mobile" does the job. It would also cover any new capabilities of things you carry around with you such as medical tracking, telescopes and magnifiers, building entry, car entry, digital money, digital store cards, rape alarms, makeup and scent dispensing (see fifth element), writing/printing, cutting things, filing, ID for cops/bouncers/border agencies, rulers/tape measures... etc. Food, drink and contraception may be a stretch, but the word "mobile" covers it all.
...And here I thought that facebook -was- a web site. I guess I need to re-evaluate my understanding of the basic architecture of the internet - apparently, technical descriptions of functionality are now determined retroactively by abstract end-user experience.
Ok, I'm going to go use my computer, and after I'm done using the computer I'lll use photoshop.
Is it just me, or are a good chunk of people here falling all over themselves to declare how much they detest cell phones, presumably mainly because other people like then?
I can only think this is the same phenomenon as people straining to emphasize how much they revile any music which some critical mass of other people like. Same with movies.
"Other people are stupid. Stupid people like stupid things. Therefore, I must not like anything which is popular. Separating myself (smart) from others (idiots) will raise my reputation in the eyes of my fellow misanthropes, thereby making me popular among them. This is essential, since they themselves (being arrogant and sanctimonious) are popular by dint of -not- being popular with the world in general.
The more things I hate, the cooler I am, since by definition I am cooler than someone who likes something; he has by definition joined -a group-, which is proof of stupidity. If I hate everything, my utter disdain for the entire world makes me the coolest person among those cool enough to hate things the -sheeple- (ie, people who agree with a lot of people about anything) like.
This is neccesary because nobody else can stand to be around me.
"As a fan of Dutch trance music, Angry Birds, Hollywood blockbuster action films, and cell phones with lots of features, I don't think my accusations are a cover for a personal antipathy for the popular."
You know, I really wonder what about that deserves a thumbs-down. Am I accused of lying? Or is it for liking Angry Birds and Dutch trance music?
This place is so strange...
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