back to article Syrian secret police endorse male hair remover

The excessively hirsute among you looking to derug yourselves are pointed in the direction of Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Creme, which is attracting some enthusiastic reviews down at Amazon. You are, however, advised to read the instructions before applying, especially the bit about the gel not being suitable for "intimate …


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  1. EddieD

    You missed one review...

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Another classic

    P.S. How do you add proper links like what some commentards do? I've tried <a href=""></a> and I just get angle brackets.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Do you have a new account?

      I think they don't enable posting linkified URLs until the account has been around for a while and made its first few posts. Otherwise, you're going the right way about it, just use standard html a href notation and when your account is valid for it, it'll work.

      (The comments system does validate the URLs, so if you try it with a blank href like above it won't work. It appears to check both that the URL is well formed and that it DNS resolves. And from trying to post examples of working and broken URLs for you, I just discovered that all the URLs in your post have to work, and if any one of them doesn't, it disables all of them in preview, and gives a malformed html error on trying to post.)

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Do you have a new account?

        I've made about fifty posts over almost four years though every post has been as AC. Maybe that's the problem.

        <a href="">Still not working!</a>

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Another classic

      > How do you add proper links like what some commentards do?

      Watch closely. I have Nothing up this sleeve......nothing up this one......

      Aaaaannd BAM! The classic Amazon troll review.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So what IS it for?

    Can't slap it on your sack. I presume it's bugger-all use for shaving your face in the morning too. So just what IS it for? About the only skin I can think of that's tough enough to take the corrosive treatment is the skin on the bottom of my feet.

    Ah, that must be it. A simple labelling error. It's actually supposed to be "Veet for Hobbits".

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Answering my own question.

      The final sentence of the review made me realise what it's for, but raised a whole new world of confusion in my mind.

      There are people out there who actually want to look like Peter Andre?

    2. Intractable Potsherd Silver badge

      Re: So what IS it for?

      Veet for Feet?

  4. Trokair 1
    Thumb Up

    Joy of Humanity

    It is things like this that restore my faith in the human race. It is indeed Friday good friends.

  5. James O'Brien


    I wonder just what else the secret police would give rave reviews for...

    Bamboo shoots?

    Soldering irons?

    Pillow cases?

    The options are endless.

  6. FIA

    My favourite tech book comment is still:

  7. Haku

    3 Wolf Moon

    "When I put this T-shirt on for the first time, my wife left me!

    Thank you, Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt! "

    You need one of these t-shirts, just read the Amazon reviews for yourself!

    1. Havin_it

      Re: 3 Wolf Moon

      When the package arrived, I tore it open, and I SWEAR angels sang. I think it was Freebird.

      Love it. The subject of the article is clearly dominated by (Profanisaurus-reading) Brits, this one does the US chapter proud.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Once read a story of a guy who removed every hair he could manage to reach on his body including some very intimate places, only to discover that downy hair is actually required in certain areas ( between the buttocks! ) as it allows air to keep the two sides of your upper thighs and buttocks from sticking together! The gentleman in the story went on to confess that there is nothing so painful in life as hairless buttock skin rubbing together for hours and getting more sore by the second on one of the hottest days of the year!

    Once every 3 months my long suffering wife likes to give my back a good mowing, something wonderful about a hair free back on a hot sticky Summer tube train, sheer bliss!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      After running a marathon for the first time you discover exactly the same thing.

      There are places that *must* be protected from the rubbing that happens. Not good.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      I've never had that problem.

  9. Dan 10

    Great friday fodder


  10. Mike VandeVelde

    cant believe nobody posted this one yet

    Defense Tech 56895 Pepper Spray Aerosol Projector MK-9 Stream 1.3% 12 OZ

    "When I feel threatened by students, no matter how unarmed, peaceful and seated they may be, I know that Defense Technology 56895 MK-9 Stream, 1.3% Red Band/1.3% Blue Band Pepper Spray has got my back as I casually spray away at point blank range.

    It really is the Cadillac of citizen repression technology."

  11. Tony J Smith
    Thumb Up

    My own favourite set of amazon reviews has to be for this product:

    1. C-N

      Damn it! Out of stock!

    2. Sir Cosmo Bonsor

      -1 for posting affiliate links here.

  12. QuiteEvilGraham

    And my particular fave

  13. That Awful Puppy

    Oh my

    Haven't laughed so hard in ages. Actually had to piss sitting down in order not to splash my kidney champagne all over the bathroom, I was laughing so hard.

  14. Purple People Eater

    Try this one too...

    A little sample..

    "Transmission of music data at rates faster than the speed of light seemed convenient, until I realized I was hearing the music before I actually wanted to play it. Apparently Denon forgot how accustomed most of us are to unidirectional time and the general laws of physics."

  15. Rusty 1

    Worth a look too...

  16. The Axe

    Max Farquar

    As originally mentioned by Max Farquar

  17. MJI Silver badge

    1 rule of hair remover on men

    Try to keep it out of your mouth.

    Oh and I still had to shave next day - waste of time.

    And my face stunk

  18. A. Coatsworth
    Black Helicopters

    Thanks to this article and fellow commentards, I've visited, in rapid succession, pages about a drum of lube, a children's book, pepper spray and a male hair removal gel... all linked from an article that directly addresses torture...

    Now, the FBI is watching me.... isn't it? ISN'T IT??

    Black choppers... I'm certain they're circling me...

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