back to article Chinese bloke gets eel lodged up todger

A Chinese man who slid into a spa tub full of eels to enjoy some rejuvenating piscine exfoliation ended up in hospital with one of the slippery customers lodged firmly up his todger. Zhang Nan, of Honghu, Hubei Province, recounted: "I climbed into the bath and I could feel the eels nibbling my body. But then suddenly I felt a …

COMMENTS

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    To be expected

    This is what you get for wearing those new fangled trendy board shorts.

    Would never had happened with a good old fashioned pair of budgie smugglers!

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sitting crossed-legged

    Crossed-legged doesn't begin to describe the feeling, I've knotted my legs

  3. Splodger
    Thumb Up

    Wang surgeon. Really?

  4. Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
    Coat

    Penis, meet eel

    Soon to be made into a horror flick a la Human Centipede 2?

    Now where's the sick icon?

    I'm outta here.

    1. GavinC

      In 3D no doubt...

  5. Nigel Brown

    I bet

    eel be feeling a bit of a dick now.......

  6. Anonymous Coward 15
    Coffee/keyboard

    My todger is full of eels.

    Do you want to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy?

  7. jm83

    Eels crawling up inside ya,

    Didnt the Might Boosh write a little song about this?

    (and then pretend they invented the idea of writing little songs)

  8. Thomas 4

    "Pics or it didn't happen"

    I bet Lester does have piccies but he's just trying to wriggle out of it.

  9. Arctic fox
    Unhappy

    I could not read more than the first couple of sentences.

    In fact I can't write any more because my eyes are watering too badly.

  10. Arkasha

    Now that the title is optional I'm going to use it all the time

    Is this one of those "How *exactly* did you get the hoover stuck there?" A&E stories??

  11. Joefish
    Boffin

    I've seen such horror reporting of the Candiru before.

    One assumes that, contrary to the usually implied scenario, it's only urinating whilst immersed in the water that opens up the urethra and provides a warm stream that attracts the fish. Whilst salmon have been observed to be prodigious leapers and eels and catfish able to cross dry land, the thought of a juvenile fish being able to swim up a narrow stream of urine falling from several feet up (as in someone standing on the bank) somewhat stretches credulity.

  12. AceRimmer1980
    IT Angle

    One-Eyed

    Water snake.

    Coat? nothing less than a drysuit.

  13. proto-robbie
    Happy

    Eel regret not wearing a rubber johnny.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Candiru footage

    Ouch, it's not just a made up legend. :(

    Footage on YouTube:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDu1E4EndJw

    Seems like it won't swim *out of water*, but if someone pees while swimming in the river, they're in trouble.

    1. Marvin the Martian

      Your standards of proof seem a bit low.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Bruce Parry

    ... covered such a horrible thing on his trip through the Amazon where he heard of an eel which would actively seek out urine. He managed to track down a man who suffered an attack, and the doctor who treated him.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/amazon/

    I'm sure there are you tubes if you look hard enough.

  16. Simon Round
    Gimp

    here ya go....

    Playmobil or it didn't happen..

    ..Ohh I feel all Dirty Now.

  17. LiteWeight72
    Mushroom

    A photo has been found...which I regret finding now...

    http://thedailywh.at/2011/09/13/dare-you-not-to-squirm-of-the-day/

    1. Olafthemighty

      @ LightWeight

      You owe me one tub of mind-bleach.

  18. JaitcH
    Unhappy

    Very common in the tropics, or pee like the locals do

    The cases I've heard of were people urinating UNDER the water, thereby eliminating the need for a long swim.

    The locals always know more than tourists - they urinate on the ground.

    In Singapore locals laugh when they see a Foreigner walking bare footed on the sidewalks rather than using flip-flops. The reason is that Singapore puts it paving flagstones down in sand, rather than cement and a local parasite lives in the cracks and joints.

    A bare foot stepping on a joint or crack is sufficient time for the parasite to transfer to the skin and then burrow it's way into the body where it turns in to a very, ver long and destructive worm.

    Both the penile crawlers and the Singapore worms can be ejected by drinking foul tasting Chinese medicine.

  19. chris 50
    Alert

    Jeebus!

    Although, I don think I would need a horror story like this one to make me wonder whether getting into a pub of eels was a good idea or not...

    1. chris 50

      Pub?!

      Typo - meant "tub"!!

      You can see where my mind is.... %)

  20. Scott Broukell

    nearly fell of me chair i did .....

    ... when I read the name of the surgeon who assisted the poor fellow - Dr. Jim Wang.

  21. This post has been deleted by its author

  22. Big Al

    Ouch!

    That is all.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Devil

    Jeremy Wade Interview

    Jeremy Wade, Brit biologist host of the Animal Planet show River Monsters, interviewed a candiru victim and his physician. The fellow had the dead fish in his urethra for 4 days before extrication. An excerpt of the Dr. interview is available at the AP website, for the skeptical.

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What about Jane Mansfield and Lobsters

    Enough said...

  25. Alistair MacRae

    EELS!

    Eels!

    Eels!

    Eels!

    Eels up inside ya!

    Finding an entrance where they can!

    -Mighty Boosh

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