I can't help but feel
...that one careful push would have been more of a lesson, depending on the position of the hedgehog.
A Lincolnshire man who decided to take a dump on a dead hedgehog on a roadside verge in broad daylight has been fined £100 for the cable-laying outrage. Victor Ford, 34, was caught with his pants down at 1.20pm on 3 July, when a passing copper spotted him on Balmoral Avenue, Spalding, "squatting over the grass verge with his …
From the link kindly provided by Willington:
Rather than activate Ford’s suspended sentence, Mr Stobart [the judge] decided to “make it more onerous” by barring him from going to Scotland for three days.
(There is no indication as to why this could be considered as punishment.)
Reason being that the chap already has a suspended sentence. If the judge sentenced him with a serious punishment, then the suspended sentence would take priority, and he'd end up back in jail. Something for what ever reason the judge didn't want to happen. So by sentencing him to something trivial, the automatic re-activation of the suspended sentence can be avoided. Something like community service would have resulted with him back in the clink.
I'm all for non-IT stories - Paris, size 72 airbags, drunk moose in trees, Mr Bean prangs McLaren, etc.. This story was probably meant to fit in with the above mentioned and others in the same vein.
But this just isn't news. It isn't interesting, it isn't funny, it isn't memorable, and although it does involve 'naughty bits', the use of them is mundane and standard, and the visualization (in the absence of a decent picture) downright unpleasant.
Speakin of picture, itwas, IMHO, seriously subpar even for this below par story. No frogmen, playmobile people, cheeks, or silicon(e) anywhere. Can we please pick up the pace a bit, it can't be THAT slow a news day....
Oh, and I probably need to add a gratuitous FUCK YOU IDIOTS or similar for FOTW purposes (yes, I agree, a seriously sub-par attempt but the story deserves it...).
Nothing worse than being forced to read something I'm not interested in. If this carries on, I might have to somehow only read the items that might interest me. Now, if only there was some way to know what an item is about before I start reading it. Maybe some sort of headline or something.
He obviously clicked on the story because he was hoping to read about a distracting, socialite hedgehog with huge airbags causing a mime to wreck his car.
Begging the question: Where's the moose angle?!?
(Probably stepped on the hedgehog actually - why the hell else would a moose leap up a tree?)
I mean, seriously, what kind of smeghead is going to look at a dead headhog and think, 'i'll take a dump on that'. And do we really need that kind of scumbag to continue to be a member of society? Surely, for the greater good, this guy should be euthanised at the earliest possible opportunity.
live in a society of not-quite-right-in-the-head "scumbags" like Victor Ford, than live in constant peril of my life sharing a society with self-righteous bigots who think anyone whose sense of humour or outlook on life differs too much from their own should be hanged.
Joking apart, public toilet provision in this country really is dire. And can anybody here put their hand on their heart and say they have *never* *ever* had one knocking on the back door and no porcelain within sight?
(Come to think of it, if you are unlucky enough to get nicked for relieving yourself in public, could you take the local council down with you for aiding and abetting?)
Or was there any other reason why he got collared?
People are quite happy for their dogs to take a dump in the middle of the pavement when they could just as well shit at home, so why couldn't a fellow human do just that, in a moment of necessity? As long as you pick it up afterwards I don't see the problem.
As for the hedgehog, he probably hadn't seen it or identified it as such.
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