Maybe he thought the book was called "Wait and see what you're gonna get" ?
He didn't shout "You're fired!" at the crucial moment did he ?
A man was caught masturbating in a public library while perusing Lord Alan Sugar's autobiography. The Sun reported that the unnamed individual was cuffed by police last Thursday at Crawley Library in West Sussex. The man, who is in his 30s, was seen behaving oddly as he browsed books in the biz section of the library. He …
You are assuming that he was getting his jollies from the book, it ain't necessarily so. One of the things one would need, if one were the sort to jack off in a public place, is something to clean up with. There's only one thing more antisocial than performing the five fingered shuffle in public and that's leaving jism all over the place afterwards.
Name something else found in a Public Library that's a more suitable substitute for bog paper. I have to assume that the Mandelson memoir was out on loan (which would suggest an even more vile perversion is going on - someone, somewhere's reading the Mandelson book).
Can we please have a "Top ten people performing weird sex acts in public of 2010" countdown here on El Reg? Featuring stories like this from the past year. I'm not sure this will beat the bloke in sludge tank in Cornwall or the transvestite in the moat with the dog, though, but its still probably a top five contender!
I'm sad to have missed the Cornwall sludge-tanker; and likewise I suspect the naked Stirlingshire trampolinist has passed you by.
I thoroughly agree with you: this has been an "Annus Horribilis" for extreme onanism and should be commemorated in some form - perhaps other readers can suggest an appropriate medium?
A couple of years old, but this story of a man getting his pleasure from a bicycle rather amused me: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/7095134.stm
Then again, the pope (at least JP2, not sure about the current one) was regularly seen attempting oral sex with tarmac - inanimate objects, beware!
When it comes to breaking and entering this trick cyclist was more sinned against than sinning, Shirley? If I decided to have a thrash with my Mini Moulton in the privacy of my own room I probably wouldn't want the cleaners barging in. Have you seen the girls in Ayrshire? Or the boys for that matter?
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