back to article Nick Cave smashes speed camera with Jag

Australian singer, actor, writer and Kylie-killer* Nick Cave laid waste to one of Hove's speed cameras when he crashed his car into it. The incident occurred on Tuesday evening, when the 53-year-old's Jaguar saloon smashed through a barrier on the seafront and took out the innocent tool of governmental oppression, the …

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  1. Gomez Adams

    Who?

    As a non-Daily Mail reading music lover with eclectic tastes I have no idea who Nick Cave is. Must be from the 80s - the decade that music forgot.

    1. Ian Yates

      Grinderman

      See above; very good live.

      (Am I feeding?)

    2. frank 3
      Megaphone

      would that be?

      The decade that gave us at least 5 totally new genres with whole new ways of thinking about and making music?

      Starting with Hip-hop, house, acid, techno and the unstoppable rise of all genres electronic.

      The KLF, Orb, Future Sound of London, Aphex Twin and on and on and on.

      Where were you?

      Certainly not bouncing up and down in a field with a massive shit-eating grin on your face dancing like a loon to brain-bending sounds until dee morning come.

      If you were into your bleeps, it was an impossibly exciting time in music, a time when I regularly heard records that made me think: I didn't know you were allowed to do THAT with a tune!

      Yer well within your rights to hate all of that, but music didn't forget the 80s: you just had your earplugs in.

      Sheesh, wotta grouch.

      (quite like Nick Cave. He's good.)

      1. TeeCee Gold badge
        Grenade

        Re: "Starting with Hip-hop, house, acid, techno..."

        Not for the first time do I thank fuck that Goth came along and saved us from *that* shit.

        1. lurker

          erm...

          "Not for the first time do I thank fuck that Goth came along and saved us from *that* shit."

          ... not really, Goth music started in the late 70s before any of the bands mentioned. Bauhaus, the cure, etc. Plenty of former goths dropped the pointy shoes and learned to "throw shapes in the house of love" during the 80's.

        2. Pax681

          LOL@ Teecee

          have you heard much goth music lately?

          pretty much most of it electronic with beats based in banging techno and also the works of kraftwerk, front 242, laibach and many other pioneers or electronica. not that they just did electronica but that's where they ended up.

          1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

            Re: LOL@ Teecee

            Well, yeah.

          2. LesC
            Coat

            Castles in the Sky

            and before that, Hawkwind, the original pioneers of electronica (which I listen to to this day) and good ol' Delia Derbyshire at the BBC.

            Mines is the o9ne with the Roger Dean poster in the pocket.

      2. Rasczak
        Headmaster

        Music ?

        <quote>

        Starting with Hip-hop, house, acid, techno

        </quote>

        All very well, but the OP was talking about music.

    3. Pax681

      Nick and the bads seeds are great :)

      well why not educate yourself and listen to his stuff.

      his music always tells a story and i love it.

      and this is coming from a guy who'd rather listen to some thhumpy as hell EBM or aggrotek and other flavours of industrial!

      never mistake your ignorance about something as a means for measuring the worth of something.

      also you'll find that there are many musical gems from the 80's if you look outside the pop/manufactured market.

      seems those blonkers you borrowed from the stables serves you well.

      muppet

  2. peter 5 Silver badge

    LoLs

    "...innocent tool of governmental oppression..."

    "Our foremost finger-wagging journal..."

    Both are brilliant turns of phrase; right on the money.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Title may be omitted

    The good thing about The Reg is, you don't have to abase yourself reading Daily Fail and still get some amusing bits.

  4. Roger Varley

    Who?

    Sarah, we really do need a "brick smack forehead" icon.

  5. Velv Silver badge
    Stop

    Bad bad bad bad bad

    His insurance company will pay for the replacement. With the old models no longer being economical or available, new for old will get the saftey partnership a much more fully featured modern camera. (I am assuming it wasn't a new camera in the first place).

    So while we can cheer at knocking one out, they group back even stronger!

    1. ThomH

      That camera was just one day away from retirement!

      Etc.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Unhappy

    Darn

    I misread the headline as 'Nick Clegg smashes speed camera with Jag' and thought 'good on you!'

  7. MJI Silver badge

    Is the car OK?

    Stuff the scamera - is the car OK?

  8. Neil Barnes Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    Kylie-killer?

    Her best song, ever. Indeed, the only one which doesn't require a brain-vacuum after listening.

    <-- the nearest icon to Kylie.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Stop

      Ah, Kylie...

      Many words rose in my mind at the mention of her name, but first to surface was "talentless", beating "insipid" by a hair.

  9. Dazed and Confused Silver badge

    He'll be OK

    Since most Gestapo cameras work by capturing a view of you disappearing into the distance, this particular piece of mugging equipment won't have had a chance to nick him.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      re: He'll be OK

      "Since most Gestapo cameras work by capturing a view of you disappearing into the distance" - actually speed cameras work by sitting there doing nothing, as most motorists are sufficiently aware of their surroundings and in control of their vehicles that they never trigger a camera.

  10. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
    Coat

    Can we get footnotes*

    * to footnotes?**

    ** As so brilliantly done by Terry Pratchett***

    *** Often featured in both mag and comments****

    **** I'll get me coat

  11. janimal
    Thumb Up

    Thanks Nick

    That's the speed camera at the bottom of my road. :)

    1. This post has been deleted by a moderator

      1. The First Dave
        Boffin

        @Is this a first?

        Considering the article clearly says that Nick was let off, we can assume that the incident probably had more to do with icy conditions than what would normally be regarded as excessive speed.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Dual carriageway

      This speed camera is on the only decent stretch of the A259 between Brighton and Worthing, a 30mph hell hole of a road which can take an hour to do a measly 10-15 miles with stop start stop start. The dual carriageway that this is on is virtually useless with a 30mph limit, and only serves to clog up both lanes with slow traffic.

  12. Archie The Albatross
    Pirate

    Well done that man!

    And they say people have no community spirit these days, although maybe you should have dropped the kids off first Nick?

    Otherwise, jolly well done!

    Keep up the good work.

    1. ChrisM
      Joke

      Nearby

      Considering where the speed camera was located (and not fixed yet) he was very near to dropping the kids off at the pool...

  13. Steve Button
    Thumb Up

    You are ALL missing the point.

    They are re-making The Crow!

    ... and I wouldn't have got to hear about it, if it wasn't for this (accident / incident / stunt / conspiracy)* delete as applicable.

    1. Archie The Albatross
      Pirate

      Good Point

      I hope they handle with care.

      (Now feel the need to listen"Burn" by The Cure, whilst wearing a long black coat).

      1. Cazzo Enorme

        @Archie The Albatross

        ... or Trent Reznor's cracking cover of joy Division's "Dead Souls".

        1. Rattus Rattus

          @ Cazzo Enorme

          That was an awfully good cover, although I was at a goth club a few years ago when the DJ put on the original version and some numpty in the crowd piped up with "Hey! Who's doing a really shit cover of that Nine Inch Nails song?" I wept...

    2. Tzael

      Re: You are ALL missing the point.

      Yeah, the point being why on earth do they have to remake perfectly good films?! Make another installment - base this one on Michael Korby...

      Maybe this time they'll go for full CGI for the lead character, instead of only filling in the scenes Brandon Lee wasn't available for first time round.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    'Tesco Value Title Number Three - Aardvarks on the line'.

    No idea who this minstrel chappie is or what his music sounds like but well done that chap. Well played sir.

    Now THAT'S what I CALL Rock n Roll.

  15. Rogerborg

    "Cave and his two sons [...] were unhurt"

    See? SEE? Cameras save lives!

  16. Danny 2 Silver badge

    Mistaken identity?

    He probably saw the flash and thought it was a paparazzi judging from his heartfelt tribute to Princess Diana. "If there is ever an opportunity to put into exercise the much-needed practice of lynching journalists and paparazzi--you know, hanging them by the neck from trees until they are dead, then burning their bodies--then that time is now."

  17. Code Monkey
    Pint

    A good year for the Cave.

    First Grinderman 2, now this.

    Have a beer, Mr Cave. Even if it's Aussie pish

  18. drake
    Joke

    Speed Camera Murder.

    Another possible track to add to the murder ballads, although will be hard to beat 'stagger lee'...

    Nick - what a Legend!

    1. ThomH

      This being the Internet and all

      There's probably a whole bunch of people that feel very strongly about apostrophes ready to point out that "Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds Murder Ballads" (reading the cover exactly as printed) is a statement, not a title.

      But not me, because I'm a fan.

  19. AlistairJ
    Welcome

    Welcome, speed camera wrecker

    While I applaud his speed-camera destructive tendencies, I have to say, his was the only CD I have ever seriously considered taking back to the shop and asking for a refund. What a pole.

  20. ContentsMayVary

    I liked his book, but not his music. :)

    His first book anyway: "And the Ass saw the Angel". Not to everyone's taste I bet, but I liked it.

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    That's an expensive way to smash a road camera...

    I would rather stick to the usual drive-by shooting. Big game hunting rifle 'n all. A jag is just way too expensive, bullets are way cheaper.

    Get your coat too... cause you are driving today.

    Shotgun!

  22. bugalugs
    Welcome

    Is there a crafty and deliberate mistake in this otherwise elegant article ?♂

    That said, I*, for one, welcome** our new antipodean-artiste-appreciating-spelling-bee-winning-sub-head-sanding***-quote-qoutient-quaking*^-modest-modern-and-ambi-modal*^**-journalistic-over-apian****

    *** " a microscopic knot in a catastrophic dag " might have yielded Jag lol but Nick was probably not smoking gum leaves that day. When you smoke dags, all the microscopic knots burn too and it makes you cough for hours and tastes really horrible. I've heard.

    ** whether " Miss Bee " is, in fact a heavily made-up 120kg 50's bloke in a fish-net body-suit who also drives a little taxi-cab and is awaiting gender re-assignment surgery or not and I don't think zhe is.

    **** see ** *^ two crackers in one story ! ! *there is no* *^**no, really

    ♂ :X

  23. tony trolle

    but if they remake The Crow

    and the star does not kill himself ; The Crow II, Crow III etc etc etc.

    And its listed on IMDB with a Pre-production status

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1340094/

    but that means little, just no money yet lol.

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