Poor res CCTV
>> He is described as white with short dark hair and a moustache.
Are they sure it's not a strip of bacon across his upper lip?
I'll get my coat...
Surrey police are hunting a burglar who broke into a house in Redhill, Surrey and swiped a packet of bacon - except for a single rasher left chillingly draped over the front door handle. As well as clearing the family's fridge of their salty pork belly breakfast meat, in the early hours of September 4, the thief also swiped a …
Right the first time really.
"non-IT news related story" implies it is a "story" not related to "IT News"
"non-IT related news story" implies it is a "news story" not related to "IT"
since the article is a "news story" (a telling of recent factual events), rather than a "story" (a narrative piece of writing either fiction or non-fiction, not necessarily recent in either case), the original grammar works best.
For more insight please read my latest book:
Mein Kampf (gegen die schlechte Grammatik)
Wonder if this bloke is related to the criminal mastermind that scaled my 10-foot garden fence (with decorative victorian spikey bits) and stole a solitary tray of seedlings, leaving behind the identical seed tray sitting next to it, along with the lawn mower, watering can, etc also sitting on the porch, then re-scaling the fence and leaving nary a trace.
A man goes to the Doctor and says that he has a serious sexual problem.
When asked to give details, the man says that for a very long time he has
been wanting to put his knob in the bacon slicer. The doctor is
astounded, and gives the man some pills and instructs him to take one
every day and to then come back and see him in a week. A week later the
man returns and the Doctor asks him how things went, to which the man
replies that he couldn't resist the urge and finally just had to put his
knob in the bacon slicer. A little worried, the Doctor asks to take a look
at the man's knob, but on inspection he can find nothing wrong with it.
"There's nothing wrong with you, what about the bacon slicer?" asks the
Doctor, to which the man replies "I don't know, he ran away!"
A man goes to the butcher, and asks for some beef from the top shelf
"You can't have it", he gets told
"Why", he asks
"Because the steaks are too high"
I'm thankfully old enough to have seen him on TV. Quality - he was one of the few who could deliver this stuff absolutely dead pan (well, for a moment, I liked that he usually had to laugh about it himself).
Two blondes walk into a building.
Funny, at least one of them should have seen it..
"Doctor, my arm hurts if I do this"
"Then stop doing that"
There's movie potential, in the story. I bet the bloke could even strike a deal, about it. I see the States' own Robert De Niro cracking safes and expunging their contents, only to leave a full slab of bacon deposited in the vault - a dramedy!
The big case comes when - in an epic dramatic inversion - when De Niro attempts to pilfer the contents of the Honey Baked Ham treasury vault, only to deposit a small stack of $20 bills, in place of the porky products.
Hey, it's modern drama, "anything goes."
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