back to article Cops cuff armed white supremacist in banana costume

A Washington state US Marine reservist was earlier this week cuffed following a lively Tuesday afternoon which saw him dress in a child's banana costume, indecently expose himself and wave a shotgun in the street while shouting "something or other about white supremacy". Carlton Jeffery Kohnert, 21, accompanied by Anthony …

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  1. AndyS
    Happy

    Brilliant.

    Just the sort of story there should be more of in the news. Crazies doing crazy things.

  2. Trevor_Pott Gold badge
    Badgers

    Well there we go.

    I think I've hit my limit on doses of the totally random for the week. I am currently in the middle of building 20 routing/VPN/firewall/etc. VMs, configuring a bunch of new domain controllers whilst fighting with Certificate Services, Office Communications Server and what I think are some bad routes on my ISP's side.

    There is something completely surreal about working intensely for 12 hours on that, (in a city that's covered in chokingly thick smoke from the forest fires a province over,) and then popping up for a breather only to read an article like that.

    My entire conscious mind just threw up a parse error, dumped the core and rebooted. Now I have to run memtest to see if there’s a bad DIMM up there which will take all bloody nig---zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…….

    1. M Gale

      And on a similar if less complex note...

      ..I've been fighting with Virgin Media lately because they seem to have completely ditched their subscription dialup service (a hangover from telewest/blueyonder days when it was called 'surfunlimited'). The 179 number exists and dials a POP, but username/password is refused and my VM webspace doesn't exist.

      Oh, and they are still continuing to place a "subscription dialup" item on the bill, despite the service apparently not existing. According to the last-line engineer I spoke to, 179 doesn't exist either (uhm.. yes it does, try it from a cablephone). My account exists. My customer number exists, but for some reason the subscription dialup service has without any warning or reason that I know of, just completely disappeared and nobody at VM has a clue. He passed me back to some Indian customer services rep who wanted me to sign up to a whole new 12 month contract for broadband (plus a £35 installation charge) when I'm not going to be living here for the next 12 months and the household has been with Virgin ever since they were Telewest. I feel like finding the nearest VM offices and having a nice long shouting match with them but I've a feeling it'll be as much use as pissing into a hurricane.

      Still, at least someone was brave enough to loan me a T Mobile 3G dongle, so I can still enjoy my Fridays.

  3. M Gale
    Badgers

    Friday already?

    Paint me amused. I just hope some video shows up of the incidents.

  4. Anonymous Coward 3
    Happy

    Friday?

    Do you make these stories up just to brighten my Fridays? Thank you!

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    I'm confused....

    ...this sounds like standard marine behavior (well at least when overseas).

  6. Ian Emery Silver badge
    WTF?

    "Sergeant Randy Pieper"???

    You SURE you didn't just make this name up??

  7. Lionel Baden

    ahem

    pics or it didnt happen !!

    i am horribly intruiged .....

    1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: ahem

      White dude, probably with moustache, in banana costume. Use your imagination.

      1. Was Steve

        Failing that...

        I'm sure there's plenty of *ahem* premium internet sites willing to fill your imagination gap...

        (If there isn't let me know, and one can be cobbled together for a suitable fee! :)

      2. MeRp

        he was a Marine

        US Marines pretty much never have mustaches; they go i9n for the whole jarhead haircut, though.

  8. JaitcH
    WTF?

    Likely another victim of the Middle East Wars

    Given the wasted human lives that have resulted from the American Wars in VietNam, Iraq and Afghanistan and the mediocre support they get from their military employers post deployment this type of behaviour is somewhat common in the U.S.A.

    It causes one to wonder how the World War II military personnel survived up to 5 or 6 years, without home leave, whereas today's relatively pampered soldiers with regular rotations seem to be ill-equipped to handle the fighting.

  9. Chris Hatfield
    IT Angle

    The guy is

    bananas

  10. JakeyC

    Randy Pieper

    Is a 'randy peeper' really the best officer to be arresting a flasher?

  11. LaeMing Silver badge
    Go

    He has a point

    Bananas are clearly superior to all other fruit.

  12. Phil NZ
    Thumb Up

    Classy

    Because nothing screams racial superiority like banana costumes and indecent exposure.

  13. Cameron Colley
    Coat

    "..discharging a weapon..."?

    I thought he just showed the woman it?

    1. Mister_C
      Coat

      this is a reply

      Nah, just better dressed.

      Unless you're talking about oranges

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Grenade

      He could be...

      ...a heroic soul driven over the edge by the horrors of war. Or he could just be an inbred redneck drunk.

      Occam's razor and all that...

    3. Mark C 2
      Alert

      @JaitcH

      ...probably because the US watched what was happening for ~4 years from the side-lines so had a fairly good idea of who the aggressors were and then got their @rses kicked by the Japanese at Pearl Harbour so decided enough was enough and joined the Allies and help defeat the Nazis.

      Having home territory attacked would be enough sufficient to motivate most people, added to that the 4 years of coverage in the media keeping the population informed.

      Having political masters decide on a war that isn't a response to direct aggression, is based on some very dubious decisions, would not.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      FAIL

      What the hell?

      Seriously? That was pretty lame. I mean... actually it was -really- lame. I opposed the Iraq war, and have little time for the politics that fomented it - but I respect the soldiers who are there doing the job the civilian government told them to do.

      That respect is apparently too much for you to muster; it was further remarkable to see someone respond to a post about a banana-clad, gun-waving nutball with political invective, ad hominems hurled at soldiers, and, to top it off, a "what's the matter with kids these days" argument, and a distillation of a "back in my day" Monty Python sketch. Well done, that.

    5. OffBeatMammal

      fruits?

      I thought they were a herb...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Herb

        No, technically they are fruit. It's just that generally they don't contain seeds. Cut one in half and you can see where the seeds should be.

        Some say this is because they have evolved not to need seeds because humans propogate them. Others say this is cock because evolution happens much too slowly for that to have happened.

        Others don't give a toss and quite simply can't be bothered with all this crap. Seriously, I worked in a supermarket as a teenager and we actually got a letter of complaint from some dweeb requesting that we move tomatoes from the vegetable section to the fruit section.

        1. John H Woods

          Confusion ...

          The thing the banana fruits grow on is, technically, a herbacious plant rather than a tree. Is this what you were thinking of?

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Happy

        Herb? and Oranges?

        No, I think it's Peaches and Herb....

    6. Captain DaFt

      Then and now

      WWII: You spent your deployment enduring all the horrors of war, then you and your chums were pulled behind the lines, sent to the nearest harbor where you waited for a ship to become available, after which you sailed home on a leisurely ocean cruise.

      During the weeks all this normally took, you had time to relax, talk with other soldiers heading home, and prepare for the new life back home as a civvie while putting the trauma of war behind you..

      Now (Vietnam to present): You spend your deployment enduring the horrors of war, then you report to a chopper (usually alone) that takes you to an airport where you're placed on a plane (usually civilian) within hours, and sometime the next day, you're back home with your ears still ringing from your last firefight, no time to adjust, relax, prepare, forget.

      Which one sounds like a more traumatizing transition to you?

  14. Dan 10
    WTF?

    Genius

    A story involving a "Sergeant Randy Pieper", a drunk Bananaman and a shotgun. It doesn't get any better!

    Only one icon for it, obviously.

  15. Arkasha

    This is begging for

    a Playmobil reconstruction.

  16. LuMan
    Coat

    2 charges in one

    We could streamline the judicial process here by combining the 'aiming or discharging a weapon' charge with the 'indecent exposure'.......

    Mind you, I wouldn't want a Marine to discharge either weapon anywhere near me (ew!).

    Mine's the one with the banana in the pocket.

    1. Gene Poole
      Thumb Up

      Agreed.

      It's Friday afternoon, so let's jave it!

    2. Mike Richards

      Not just Playmobil

      It kinda needs animating to the glorious soundtrack of Yackety Sax.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Playmobil

    Or it didn't happen.

  18. Mako
    Pint

    Oustanding blaze of mayhem...

    ...but I can only award an 8/10.

    Extra points could have been earned if they'd done it in a stolen ice cream truck.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    You can probably blame the Brits for this...

    That is if the drug "Jeffry" really exists. (You have to see 'Get Him to the Greek')

  20. Jimbo 6
    Happy

    Banana costume...

    ...presumably because 'white supremacists' are generally bent, yellow, and hang round in bunches...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Thank you.

      Thanks for that, Luckilly I hadn't started my coffee before I read it.

      You forgot to mention that white supremicists don't actually admit to any of that, but then again I've never heard a banana admit to it either.

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Willy or won't he?

    So, this banana costume, did it have four skins or just a prick?

  22. El
    Coat

    Or as they call this in the States...

    Just another normal Tuesday afternoon!

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Pint

    suddenly...

    I don't feel guilty about riding through town on my motorcycle, wearing nothing but chaps, a bandana over my face and a viking helmet..

    The look on the old lady's face, in the rear view mirror, when she got a glimpse of my hairy buns was worth any jail time I would have had, had I been caught.

    Thank GOD for the statute of limitations!

  24. skellious
    IT Angle

    "awaiting a warrant to search the car"

    What? You aren't allowed to just search a car in the US once you have arrested the driver?? (or even beforehand with reasonable suspicion.)

    also, where is the IT angle?

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Video

    A bystander caught the incident on video:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8iEatWL6Er0

  26. Nameless Faceless Computer User
    Joke

    I've seen this show

    Are you sure this isn't a re-run of Reno 9-1-1?

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