back to article Balinese lad seduced by bovine temptress

A Balinese teenager caught in flagrante delicto having sex with a cow claimed he was the victim of a bovine temptress who'd wooed him with sweet words, the Jakarta Globe reports. Unemployed youth Ngurah Alit, 18, was nailed "stark naked positioned behind the cow in a rice paddy field" in the coastal village of Yeh Embang in …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Quality

    This is why I love reading the Reg' :-)

  2. M Gale
    Badgers

    Friday already?

    What a silly moo. I see it ended up in udder failure for them both.

  3. Wize

    Pictures or...

    "other family members shouted at photographers not to take pictures"

    Were any taken?

  4. Carlos.
    Heart

    What a........

    Mooving story.

  5. Prag Fest
    Thumb Up

    Dont be too hard on the lad

    Hey, I'm sure it's happened to the best of us.

  6. LuMan
    Pint

    I shouldn't laugh, but...

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaAAAAAaAAAaAaaaaaa!!

    Perhaps it was a really mooooo-ving ceremony!

  7. jake Silver badge

    Hmm ...

    "The cow's owner received five million rupiah (£370) as compensation"

    Doesn't that make him/her a pimp/madam?

  8. Scott 19
    Coat

    Tit-le

    Mooo-ve along, nothing to see here.

  9. Hedley Phillips

    Good excuse

    I will have to use this one if the wife ever catches me balls deep in an ugly cow after a good night out.

    1. L1feless

      yea it does...

      But the locals say his women are all fat cows.

  10. Ken Hagan Gold badge
    Unhappy

    Given the choice...

    I'd rather share a planet with the boy than with the cow-drowning mob. I dare say the cow was (latterly) of the same opinion, but nobody asked her.

  11. Sir Runcible Spoon Silver badge
    Coat

    Sir

    Am I the only one that thinks £370 notes is a bit steep for a bit of cow-pensation?

  12. Vladimir Plouzhnikov

    But the real question is

    Did they eat the cow?

  13. adnim Silver badge
    Coat

    Hard to resist...

    a female making cows eyes at ya!

    1. rciafardone
      Boffin

      Wasnt compensation for that...

      It was compensation for the cow he lost, because the people of the village ceremonialy drowned it. It was actually quite cheap, in USA a cow can cost around 900 bucks.

  14. Graham Bartlett
    Joke

    Bart Simpson says

    Don't have a cow, man.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    El Barto

    In the words of the great El Barto, "Don't have a cow man".

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Should have

    eaten the evidence.

    1. Sir Runcible Spoon Silver badge
      Joke

      Sir

      Perhaps he was about to?

      Yuck - I've grossed myself out now.

  17. CASIOMS-8V

    Nothing to see here . . .

    MOOOve on

  18. gabor1

    And where is

    the obligatory Playmobil™ reconstruction?!?

  19. John 48
    Pint

    Its an odd way

    to steak one's reputation!

  20. Fred Mbogo
    Heart

    What's wrong with marrying a MooCow?

    The lad achieved recursivity by having a steak within a steak.

    Maybe he was trying to resurrect his family? Ask him if he saw any naiads or mermaids.

    How do I know that it won't kill you like it did the cow?

    I love this place.

  21. Elmer Phud Silver badge
    FAIL

    S'not my fault!

    Another example of another culture where men are strong and manly and women mere baby-farmers. Where the ultra-strong male is apparently as weak as a kitten in a sack in the canal once a woman looks at him.

    Once agan it's all the woman's fault - and even better when she can't defend herself.

    The fail icon really isn't big enough for these arseholes.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I have had a similar experience for a long time...

    ...then decided divorce was the better option.

  23. Anomalous Cowturd
    Joke

    Seems a tad harsh on the victim...

    She gets drowned, he gets his laundry done.

  24. The Indomitable Gall

    Ow, my heritage....

    Thanks, Reg.

    Please remember that many folk tales in many, many cultures revolve around animals that turn into men or women and conjugate with the locals. This particular story presents a rather unpleasant theory about the origin of these tales. I don't know if I'll be able to listen to a story about selkies or kelpies ever again....

  25. DrJaymansLoveCookie

    Cliché

    "Locals moved quickly to "cleanse the village of the unholy act of a man mating with a cow", arranging a quick and evidently entertaining seafont wedding..."

    Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?

  26. Peter Simpson 1
    Unhappy

    Reception menu...

    ...featured the bride, did it?

  27. Blubster
    Coat

    He must....

    ...have had the horn

  28. This post has been deleted by its author

  29. TeeCee Gold badge
    Coat

    Important question.

    Once the cow was dead, did he get the horn?

  30. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Which is more embarassing?

    Getting caught playing rear-end rodeo, or the "she was gagging for it honest" fantasy he came up with.

    I won't hold my breath for a Playmobil - Extreme Porn law territory for sure.

  31. proto-robbie
    Gates Horns

    Sorry reverend...

    ...I just got a little horny.

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Poor guy...

    ...he had to marry Sarah Palin.

  33. Pete 8
    Terminator

    Holey

    Cow!

  34. Dave 125

    Reg missed a trick there

    Unemployed youth Ngurah (pronounced "moo") Alit...claimed the cow called his name

  35. C-Sick

    Balinese boy bangs bovine.

    Animal Alit-erated.

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