back to article Regent Street blocked by iPad fanboi swarm

Fair play to Apple - they might be turtleneck-wearing control-freaks but they run a lovely queue. Several hundred fanbois and at least one fangirl were queuing up this morning to get their hands on an iPad. The line stretched from the Apple shopfront on Regent Street all the way round the corner onto Hanover Street. And …

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  1. Ben Brandwood
    Go

    Hmmm

    Seeing that the pre-orders were being delivered yesterday, I've sat on my comfy soft, with a nice cup of tea, reading about the queues on my iPad

    :D

  2. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Nobody wants a empty midnight launch

    I wonder how many people in line were employed by PR firms working for Apple? This is standard Microsoft tricks too. (70% of the people inline for HMV Oxford street Xbox launch apparently worked for 2 top London PR firms...)

    Still if it makes headlines and people are too stupid to see through it....

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Stu Wilson
      Jobs Halo

      no reason to have a title here

      funny that, i'm betting the percentage is 0.

      the difference being that whatever you want to call them, sheep, fanbois etc, actually WANT the product and are prepared to camp out for them.

      Is their want your want? probably not by the tone of your post, but that doesnt mean that they are wrong and you are right.

      I'll be getting an ipad, not a netbook or another laptop, it will replace my aging MacBook whose sole purpose was for surfing on the couch and in the kitchen because I am of the personal opinion that it's what I need for the job I will use it for.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Oh - they're adults!

    Isn't it supposed to be children with no sense of patience and a distorted sense of what is critical to have *NOW!!!!*

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Now that they are all in one place...

    ... line up the padded wagons. Or how about a cull?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    'Hands' sore from Clapping and Cheering'?

    WTF!!:? Why ????? Hardly going to change the world is it?

  6. Uk_Gadget
    Joke

    I want to....

    see their faces at noon after they scratched the screen...

    I wonder what they are called in Ireland?

    1. dogged

      What they are called in Ireland

      "feckin eejits".

      1. Mexflyboy
        Coat

        ha....

        Come on, we all know the Irish are still just working their way through Windows 95!

        1. John 62

          95?!

          begorah! what's that new-fangled Windaas 95 ye speak of, boy?! bejayzus, I'm glad it comes on floppy disk or we'd have to go to the big smoke to get a SEE DEE droive. top o the marnin til ye etc. EOI agus slainte

          1. Rattus Rattus
            Coat

            You're obviously not really Irish...

            You sounded WAY too sober.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Unhappy

    Sad

    Sad (can't find anything else to say on these Apple queues that has not been said already)

  8. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    I'm sure

    I'm sure that 90% of those queing up have no real idea what they'll use it for.

  9. spencer

    these people are idiots

    there is nothing more to add.

  10. Mike Hanna
    Joke

    CS

    "PS - please email us your experiences, and pictures, if you've been joining the multitudes..."

    ...with a water cannon and / or CS gas!

    Thought I'd try and get in there first with an anti-fanboi comment before anyone else :)

  11. Rumcajz
    Badgers

    clap and cheer...

    "An Apple staffer was handing out bottles of water to iPad-less refugees. He said his hands were hurting from clapping and his voice hoarse from cheering - he'd been working since 6am."

    So he is paid to clap and cheer? Uh huh. Hmmmm. To what purpose? Does the shop open earlier, or the queue move faster, or do people buy more iPads if there is a vocal and appreciative audience? Or do the fanbois/goils need some warming up on this special day? Do they not clap and cheer enough spontaneously to satisfy the media or Apples' collective ego?

    It's sounding a bit like the Windows launch parties, a little too Potemkin village / Disneyland unreal for my liking...

    Nothing against Jobs / Apple, just sick of hype manufacture. Let the products create the good feeling, not the marketers.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    I just dont understand them....

    What is wrong with these people, dont they have anything better to do than stand i a queue for a day.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Troll

    (untitled)

    I don't get it the rationale behind this first-day rush, don't these people realize that in a couple of weeks they'll be able to simply enter the store and purchase their coveted gadget right away?

    One wonders how they've been able to survive this long without their iWhatever...

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Fanbois

    Such a sad breed of tosser.

    1. Jess

      Sad + iPad =

      iSad

      How come I've not seen anyone use this term yet?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      FAIL

      @spencer

      Did you read about the first chap in the queue - 17 years old from Essex, started queueing since mid-day Thursday, intended to buy a 32GB, but when his dad discovered he was first in the queue helped him buy the 64GB.

      What a great story - can you imagine how happy that boy is now, bringing a 64GB version home instead of the 32GB which he would have been thrilled to have too? Put a smile on my face imaging his happiness, I'm sure that kid is so excited right now, and yet, you have the audacity to call him an idiot. How offensive of you. Feel better about yourself?

      There is nothing more to add.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Happy

        You downvoters

        Sure act like sheep. Ironic isn't it?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Nope

          We downvote not because others downvote, but because you fanbois and shills talk shite.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Troll

            @raidet

            I'll believe that when I see one cogent and inoffensive position put forth on this forum by the anti-Apple-ites. Until then, I'll assume anytime they see someone talking about Apple products without derision they'll do what the chap before them did exactly, in the exact same way, mindless moving the cursor over the downvote button and clicking.

            Put forth cogent and inoffensive opinions and act civilly (i.e. no ad hominems) and maybe they'll be viewed differently.

            Until then there is no discussion with them, there is only their misbehaviours which need to stop. I'm interested in understanding more of the why of their position, not that they think I am an idiot undeserving of their respect.

            1. Steve Roper
              Jobs Horns

              An anti-Apple fanatic replies cogently

              I am one of the "mindless downvoters" you refer to. Yes, I despise Apple, to the point that not only will I never buy an Apple product, but I won't even allow people to bring one into my house.

              The reason is two-fold, and takes some explaining. First of all, consider the insane level of control-freakery exhibited by Apple. Now Microsoft are certainly no poster child of freedom and openness, but next to Apple they look like a benevolent charity. At least I can write and distribute a Windows program without having to get Microsoft's approval and without having to pay them a license fee to do so. At least Microsoft don't attempt to tell me what I can and can't have on my machine (re: Apple's attitude towards porn, for example). Etcetera, etcetera - the issues surrounding Apple's oppressive control-freakery around their devices have been gone into ad nauseam.

              Fine, you say, don't buy one. Apple aren't a monopoly, it's not like you don't have a choice. Yes, this is true, I have the choice not to buy Apple products. For now. Let me clarify that "for now" because therein lies the antagonism I and my ilk have for Apple "fanbois".

              What angers me, and very likely most of the anti-Apple crowd if they could just express it, is not so much Apple's control-freakery, but the fact that so many millions of people are buying into it, thereby legitimising it. These people are establishing the standard that it is acceptable and profitable for companies like Apple to dictate to the public how the devices we pay for may and may not be used. I hold in contempt those PC do-gooders who call for stricter laws, for the same reason - they legitimise government oppression and undermine freedom and democracy. If it was a few lone bigots in the wilderness, it would be a non-issue - but when millions of people buy into dictatorial practices, in whatever form - it becomes a serious problem. It's no different to people refusing to buy coats made of baby seal skins - if you do buy one, many people will regard you as an arsehole, because you've funded the market for killing baby seals. In the same way do we regard Apple supporters, because they are funding a market for a company that takes away one's right to use a product how they see fit.

              So today I may indeed have the choice not to buy Apple. But if so many people are okay with such a level of walled-garden control, will my having any choice in future retain any meaning, when every other company has gone the same road because Apple have shown that it works?

              This, I believe, is why you see such bitter opposition to Apple and its supporters in these forums.

              1. GavinC
                FAIL

                Definition Of Irony

                Definition Of Irony:

                An El Reg commentard that wont buy an Apple product because he objects to Apple dictating what can be installed on the device, while he himself dictates what devices people can bring into his house!

                control-freakery indeed!

                1. Steve Roper
                  FAIL

                  Re: Definition Of Irony

                  If millions of people wanted or needed to visit my house, your comment would be valid. What Apple does affects the world at large. What I do affects only the dozen or so people who visit me - and only one of those has an iPhone, and she knows me well enough not to bring it in with her.

                  I do not believe that asking people not to bring certain items into one's home constitutes "control-freakery", since anyone has the natural right to ask that people don't bring or do certain thing in their homes. Are you being a control freak if you refuse to allow someone to smoke in your house?

              2. Mark Mitchell

                What a load of baloney

                You talk utter shite my friend.

                You can write any program you like (but I doubt you have the intellect) for the OS X platforms - I assume you intended to refer to the iPhone platform ?

                In terms of the iPhone platform then yes you do have to follow the app guidelines - for the vast majority of users (read non geeks) this is a good thing and ensure the platform remains safe from the more salubrious content and free from malware crap.

                If you believe that Microsoft don't intend to do something similar on Windows Mobile 7 (or whatever it's now called) then you are sadly mistaken.

                The adoption rate of the iPhone/iPod Touch/iPad just show that what the majority of users want is diametrically opposed to the wishes of the geek powerusers.

                Open your eyes and grab one of the latest Apple products - you might just enjoy the experience.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Happy

          Not sheep

          Lemmings.

    3. Anonymous John
      Happy

      Re clap and cheer.

      He's a fluffer!

    4. NightFox

      It's a personal thing

      If you don't understand it, you never will. Just accept it.

    5. lglethal Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      And...

      And at a much discounted price...

      You know the old saying - a fool and his money...

      1. Geoff Campbell
        Happy

        Discounts....

        Say what you like about Apple (and I often do), the one thing you can guarantee is that you'll be waiting a long, long time for discounts on a newly launched product from them.

        GJC

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Completed that for you

        Are soon parted at the Apple store

    6. The Fuzzy Wotnot
      Happy

      Profit?

      Attempting to sell on eBay to make a profit?

      Best of luck!

  15. Rabbers
    Stop

    It Really can't be *that* good!

    'Nuff said!

  16. RainForestGuppy
    FAIL

    Baaaaaaa!!!

    Not one indiviual or unique thought amongst the lot of them.

    A bunch of Geeks thinking that having an Apple toy will make them look cool.

    A FAIL for the collective Gene pool, please do not let these idiots breed. In fact looking at the pictures of the queues most of them won't anyway

    I'm not knocking the the tech, just the fools who queue up all night to get it.

  17. John Lilburne

    Bloody hell

    Don't they know you can buy stuff online?

  18. Lui-g

    Why not pre-order?

    Why queue?

    Why not pre-order?

    iPad is SO yesterday.

    Surely a true fanboy would have known about the pre-order date, and have been saving up for the magical device for at least 4 years.

  19. Rik Ryall
    Jobs Horns

    What a contrast...

    ...the British iGeek is to those in Murrica...

  20. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Whyyyyy?

    I still don't understand what the target market is for an iPad. Jobs' described it as "really really good", that's hardly selling it.

    I can't stand Mac fanbois/girls.

  21. Jean-Paul

    MK

    Yep I was at MK this morning at 630 and around 830 walked out with my 64Gb 3G...Lots of water, starbucks and danish/muffins were laid on by Apple....

    Already got my PDFs loaded and don't have to carry than 10k pages contract around with me...Me and my back are happy...

  22. Annihilator
    WTF?

    Clapping and cheering

    "An Apple staffer was handing out bottles of water to iPad-less refugees. He said his hands were hurting from clapping and his voice hoarse from cheering - he'd been working since 6am."

    What was he clapping or cheering about exactly?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "Not one indiviual or unique thought amongst the lot of them."

      ..said the tard, following the herd to post a predictable anti-iPad moan. Call the irony police.

      1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

        Re: "Not one indiviual or unique thought amongst the lot of them."

        It's a fucking good point.

        It's probably a good time to remind you all that I seek and destroy all comments including the word 'sheeple'.

        1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

          Re: Re: "Not one indiviual or unique thought amongst the lot of them."

          I meant about the irony. Because it is. It's ironic.

        2. Bit Brain

          @Sarah Bee

          "It's probably a good time to remind you all that I seek and destroy all comments including the word 'sheeple'."

          So does that means you'll have to zap your own post? Oh and then this one. *headsplode*

          1. Paul 129
            Thumb Up

            Recursion!?

            Hey he must be a unix fan! I didn't think Apple zealots could get past the WIMP(Windows Icon Mouse Pointer) system.

    2. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Paris Hilton

      A decent notebook...

      ...really gives a good viewing surface and is not too heavy either.

    3. DrunkenMessiah
      FAIL

      You do know...

      That e-readers have been out for years right?

    4. Shadowmanx2009
      Unhappy

      @Rabbers

      Sadly, it looks like an awful lot of people are going to disagree with you!

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Jobs Horns

    YIKES!

    that's one scary looking group of people. glad i'm not a fanboi if that's what they look like in groups.

    1. Intractable Potsherd Silver badge
      Joke

      I say ...

      ... take off and nuke 'em from orbit - it's the only way to be sure!!

  24. zenp
    Pint

    ...you went toRegent street? Moooooooo....

    ....oh dear, you poor fanbois! I just returned from Croydon, with an iPad, no queues, no hassle, easy parking, blah, blah, blah. Curry's, Trojan Way, have three hundred units, and by nine o'clock they'd sold no more than thirty! Result. Now i'm gonna subject this intuitive tech to it's most stringent test to date, my 94 year old father! If he can use it, it truly is the Jesus device of all time and space, i kid you not...

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Messiah has arrived for emanicpation

    Please someone, grant Steve Jobs a sainthood.

    Nuff said.

    Paris, cos shes no angel.

  26. Hedley Phillips

    Clapping & Cheering

    "He said his hands were hurting from clapping and his voice hoarse from cheering "

    I find all this very uncomfortable, is it because I am British?

    I know I shouldn't but it just doesn't seem right. I can clap and cheer with the best of them but not about standing in a queue waiting for a piece of tech.

    Hell Yeah!

  27. RichyS
    Jobs Halo

    My experience

    Went to work yesterday. Got home. Pre-ordered iPad was waiting for me.

    Queuing. Why?

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Odd,,,,

    Whilst the first photo seems to show the expected mindless drones who will buy something with no obvious use, the second appear to show quite a few "old boys" who have either been sleeping rough and woken to find themselves in a queue, or have just wander over hoping that free water will soon be followed by a free hot meal.

  29. Craig 12

    In other Q related news...

    There was a massive line waiting for JJB to open today... is there a sporting equivalent of an iPad being released today?

    I don't think Apple would be too happy with these line pics... they're all miserable old men!

  30. leeeeeb
    Thumb Up

    Or just go to a shop.

    Picked on up at Currys this morning. No queue (well three people) and they seemed to have good stock of all the models.

    The staff had all been instructed to clap though, which was a little awkward. Erm.. yeah, thanks, you didn't clap when I bought a washing machine last month.

  31. Jimmy Floyd
    Paris Hilton

    A friend of mine had one yesterday...

    ...and I've been irritating the shit out of him by refusing to acknowledge it as a computer, merely as a fashion accessory.

    I mean, it's a lovely fashion accessory but so is a Gucci handbag.

    1. Oz
      Joke

      Re: or just go to a shop.

      Er, it wasn't a slow hand-clap, was it?

    2. Elmer Phud

      I'd second that . . .

      'cos saints is dead peple

    3. RichyS
      Grenade

      Croydon. Oooh, the glamour

      'cos if you queued in Croydon, you probably wouldn't make it to the morning alive.

      There is no good reason to go to Croydon. Ever. Not even if they had the last iPad on earth.

    4. Steve Evans

      re:...you went toRegent street? Moooooooo....

      Reminds me of the O2 late opening iPhone "hype"... I went to my local highstreet (where I could park after 6pm for free) and walked to the O2 store... Man on the door looked excited and went to hand me a numbered ticket. I brushed him aside and wandered into the shop, bought the 8gig MicroSD card I wanted, and wandered off again.

      There were more staff that customers.

      That's probably to one and only thing I would thank Apple for... Saving me 70p parking when i wanted that memory card for my Nokia... *snigger*

      Re your father, mine isn't quite as old as yours, but I wouldn't trust mine with anything made after 1970... He'd have it in bits looking for the valves (vacuum tubes to those in the colonies)!

    5. Anonymous Coward
      Pint

      Quite

      Accidently wandered into the Apple store in Thurrock on opening day, yes all these trendy lookalikes in t-shirts cheering made me feeling very British, ie stiff upper lip and "None of that Yankee nonsense here please you whipper-snappers!!".

      My little girl was 5 at the time, screamed the place down 'cos all the fruit coloured employees scared her so much!!!

  32. Nathan 13

    OMFG

    When I plan to treat myself to a nice shiny toy I do look forward to receiving it admittedly, but to get up at dawn and queue for hours is just unbelievably sad.

    I could just about understand it if the thing was being given away for free, but queuing up for hours to spend lots of cash HAHAHAHAHA

  33. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Several hundred fanbois and at least one fangirl

    Shouldn't that be Fangurl?

  34. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    El Oh El

    My other half works in currys, if she has to clap when selling them ill never let her live it down :D

  35. Neil 23

    What's the collective noun for Apple fanbois?

    A flock? A cult? A gullible? A fleecing?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      @Neil

      The berated? The belittled? The offended? The attacked?

      1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

        Re: @Neil

        That's not how you collective-noun.

        An enthusiasm. A huddle. A smug.

        1. dogged

          A smug's not bad

          But I think "a preen" is better.

          1. alwarming
            Paris Hilton

            Considering that apple used to be a fruit..

            How about "A Persimmon of Fruit Flies" ?

            http://bit.ly/baMZlr (a collection of collective nouns).

            Paris, coz she might prefer the fruit in a fly.

        2. Andus McCoatover

          Collective for jobsworth fanbois?

          Try "a murder."

          (Well, they're 'crowing' about their perceived success).

          (Let the fanbois look it up on Google. If they've access to a wifi point)

          OK, Ok

          I've done their homework. If they bought one this morning, the battery probably ain't much use yet.

          http://www.pubquizhelp.com/animals/groups.html

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: What's the collective noun for Apple fanbois? → #

      A susceptibility of fanbois?

  36. envmod

    lol

    lol

  37. Crazy Dave
    Boffin

    The two photos...

    Photo 1: Fanboi/Fangirl collective "Want it now! Want it now! Want it now!..."

    Photo 2: Opportunists "Gonna make a mint on selling this to anyone who didn't get one!"

    I also like the Anonymous Coward explaination :P

  38. Naadir Jeewa

    Twats

    Went to PC World Tottenham Hale, at 8:55am. No queue. Was out in 15 minutes a newly paid up member of the Jobsian Cult.

    1. Geoff Campbell
      Coat

      PC World

      Well, would you want to risk being photographed queuing outside PC World?

      Mine's the one with the HTC Desire in the pocket. Or it would be, if the feckin' Post Office hadn't lost it....

      GJC

      1. Geoff Campbell
        FAIL

        PC World Take 2

        As I was a little early coming home, I dropped by PC World. Not a sign of an iPad or any related information anywhere in the store, at all. Popped next door to Currys, exactly the same.

        I mean, I wasn't really a serious purchaser, just a curious bystander, but WTF? Do they not want to sell me one?

        GJC

    2. The Fuzzy Wotnot
      Happy

      Well done sir!

      So you made back alive across the world's most dangerous car park?!

      T.Hale retail car park is a nightmare of Carmageddon/Mad Max proportions, loonies just put their foot down and head straight at you. Woe betide anyone who cannot sprint the 100m in less than 10 secs!

    3. Naadir Jeewa
      Go

      Bit early for Carmageddon

      I believe the derby drivers of Tottenham were stocking up on White Lightning at 9am, so I made it out alive.

  39. Doug Reed
    Jobs Halo

    How sad

    They look like trekkies queuing at a convention!

    The thought of subscribing to the controlled world of the Jobsian dream makes me want to Puke, sad sad people. Save your money and wait for the competition to arrive, it will be a lot better and not so controlled. I am

    1. Stu Wilson
      Megaphone

      old proverb

      a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush

      The numbers of "tablet" devices projected to arrive inthe next 6 months is huge, and those that are here (Crucnhpad or whatever its being called this month) are failing miserably.

      The HP Slate when it arrives will fall apart after a year, because thats how HP make stuff, BUT WebOS on the slate should be a good fit, I'd certainly like to play with one if the price is right.

      The winners from the trailing group IMHO, are going to be the Android based tablets, as long as the user experience is concomitant across the range, otherwise it's going to splinter just like Android on the phone already has, with the same sort of backlash against the manufacturer's that has already been seen.

  40. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    hmm

    I didn't notice any queues outside the Apple store in the Westlife Centre in W12, or the phone shop in the same building, while cutting through there at about nine this morning...

  41. Justin Stringfellow
    FAIL

    clapping?

    isn't there an app for that, then?

  42. Victor Ludorum
    Coat

    That's all very well, but

    It got me thinking - what's the collective noun for fanbois?

    A herd? (They /are/ a bunch of sheep following the herd...)

    A gullible of fanbois...?

    A joke of fanbois...?

    A fruitcake...?

    Thanks, it's the one with the pockets too small for an iPad...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      RE: That's all very well, but

      a sad of fanbois?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        RE: That's all very well, but

        A collar of fanbois (and gurl)

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Oh noes...

    "If I haven't been there since 2am even though there's plenty of stock then i'm not a proper Apple fan"

    Bunch of 'tards.

  44. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Time to buy...

    After following this for a while and weighing up the pros and cons of owning an iPad as well as an iPhone 3G, I popped off to the shops...

    I came back with an HTC Desire.

    It does everything that I wished my 3G would do/would want the iPad to do, and gets Flash in there as well. Ok, the screen's smaller. But my eyesight is 20/20, so I don't care.

    I'm fed up with my 3G, nothing about the 4G has left me expectant, features of OS 4.0 (whatever device) have left me underwhelmed and if Apple's controls tighten anymore they'll be taking my calls and pre-screening my contacts.

    Bye Steve. It was a fun 2 1/2 years, but the relationship's not working anymore. It's not me, its you...

    1. Arkasha

      I just got an HTC Desire yesterday

      It's brilliant. Never spent so long playing with a new phone... Was up until 4am having got home at 8pm and spent pretty much the whole time playing with it. The wifey was not impressed!

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    can you say

    sausagefest?

  46. Ben Rosenthal

    Odd

    you really have a point, that bunch of shambling human wreckage are just after free coffee and danish! They're enough to creep Dennis Hopper out!

  47. NightFox
    WTF?

    Queue Pictures

    Where did all the Beautiful People® go? These aren't the people I see on the Apple adverts; surely fat old anorak-wearers can't own shiny new Apple things? Can't Apple implement a nightclub-type selective door policy and only sell their stuff to uber-cool young attractive designer types?

    Ooops, just excluded myself on 4 counts.

  48. Matthew 17

    Midnight launch woes

    My brother used to work for a computer game-type store, he quit as every time something new came out it had to have a midnight launch and there was the expectation that all staff come in.

    I find it odd that for something high-tech like this it requires something so low tech as to physically visit a store, just buy it on-line and a nice chap in a van will come and deliver it to your house / office without any hassle.

  49. xyz
    WTF?

    Thank you El Reg...

    ...for the photographs of the fanbois queue. Now I know what "cool" looks like NOT!

  50. Charlie Stross
    Pint

    Not being totally insane ...

    I pre-ordered an iPad. Not being unfamiliar with the Apple hype machine, I made sure to put my order in within a couple of hours of the online ordering system opening for business.

    It arrived yesterday without any queueing, screaming, or drama.

    Who *are* these people?!?

  51. Anonymous Coward
    Boffin

    on defence of the Apple queuers

    I have just remembered that last Saturday I had the misfortune to pass by the Abercrombie & Whatever cloth empire state building just off Savile Row and the show was pretty much the same with the difference that it happens each Saturday (so I am told). You must queue an hour to pay for an overpriced T-shirt while gym-pumped androgyns dance around you in the dark and perfume is sprayed around.

    The need to part of a pack is a well established survival mechanism for the human species and this is the 21 century version.

  52. Stefing
    Paris Hilton

    Eew

    Ugly bunch, aren't they?!

    Paris - because even she wouldn't shag one.

  53. Seareach

    Speaking as a fanboi

    Well maybe not a fanboi. A fanman. (Aged 59, 1st Mac an SE/30)

    A daze of fanbois

    A bemusement

    A desparation

    A clutch

    A gollum

    A beta

    A test

    Anyway: I'm going to wait for the next model, like I'm so very glad my wife waited for the revised Mini last year.

  54. johnvile

    pathetic

    could that queue be the most pathetic display of morons on the planet?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Joke

      Title

      > could that queue be the most pathetic display of morons on the planet?

      Only if they also went to a Windows 7 Launch Party

  55. James 5

    "Fans anticipate the joy of iPad ownership"

    Photo two - are you sure this isn't a picture of a Mafia hit team that's got mised in somehow?

  56. MnM

    Lego-loving freaks

    That second photo is a tipping point waiting to happen and a PR disaster if it gets on the news tonight - those are real fanbois in the flesh, not PR ringers. I'd like to see Flat-Cap Jack (foreground, right of centre) whirling around in silhouette. Cool!

    I'm sorry, but looking at that pic, I'm thinking the iPad's killer feature must be its wipe-clean screen.

  57. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    PR sucks....

    Those paid to be there by the PR companies, the sad and stupid. Welcome to the iPaid .......

  58. geronimo hashbucket

    group name

    "The smug" is the distortion field generated by Apple products and also by groups of Apple users. It's a bit like "the force" in Star Wars only it doesn't have any purpose, or, for that matter, any consciousness.

    The group name for fanpersons, imo, should be "a gloat".

  59. BoldMan
    Coat

    title?

    Surely that should be fanbois and fangoil...

    1. Rattus Rattus

      "Fangoil"

      Only at Apple Stores in New York or New Jersey.

  60. Havin_it

    Pic 2, third from left

    I hope the fruity minions didn't give him that drink. I don't think he's enjoying it very much.

  61. Mexflyboy
    Coat

    I know what terms to use!

    I think more appropriate is:

    A gloat of iPad users

    A drone of Android users

    An obfuscation of Windows users

    A guanification of Linux users

  62. Jean-Paul
    WTF?

    Don't know what worse

    just being spiteful, or being so dumb that people don't even recognise their own fear and jealousy...

    For a device and owners so 'hated' on these pages, there does seem to be a lot of interest....

    1. DrunkenMessiah
      Jobs Horns

      Oh there's plenty interest...

      ...it's just that it's all tied up in mocking the weak.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Troll

        @DrunkenMessiah

        Yes, I call it the ego and self importance inflator.

    2. mike 32
      Boffin

      I second this suggestion!

      ...and propose it be added to the official reg lexicon of collective nouns!

  63. Neill Mitchell
    WTF?

    How much?

    Starting at £429 for 16GB non 3G variant rising to £699 for 64GB 3G version. 'kin 'ell!

  64. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Collective term

    A tard of fanbois, surely?

    Meanwhile, on a continent somewhere down under, Apple screwed over their own dealers. Instead of their stock of iPads arriving, they received a message at 8am on the launch day telling them that iPads will only be available from the official Apple store.

    To make matters worse, the Apple security guards pushed press snappers out of the way to let the official Apple TV crew get the prime position.

    My guess is that Apple wanted some manufactured frenzy to hype the perceived demand. Shabby.

    1. Peter Murphy

      My suggested collective noun.

      A Kool-Aid of fanbois.

  65. Anonymous Coward
    Coffee/keyboard

    I remember...

    queuing up to buy a 48k Spectrum in 1982/3. They sold out pretty quick the first/second time round. About the same size as an iPad with "touch sensitive" typing too...

    1. John Bailey
      Thumb Up

      Yes..

      But at least the speccy could do something.

    2. Wheaty73

      Touch sensitive?

      No it bloody wasn't, if you are talking about the rubber keyed model. AFAIR you had to hit the key *just right* to get it to work

      1. John 62
        FAIL

        flat keypad

        the first one had a totally flat keypad. Obviously you didn't watch the BBC's docudrama about Sinclair & Acorn.

        1. PC1512

          @John 62

          No it didn't, the first Spectrum had a rubber keypad with "proper" buttons, not touch sensitive by any description.

          It's much more basic forerunner the ZX81 (and ZX80 before that) had "flat" keyboards using membranes for keys. Not really touch sensitive either by any definition we'd recognise now - they were physical buttons that you pressed, just not very hard.

      2. Giles Jones Gold badge

        Hmmm

        I think if you showed someone an iPad back in 1982/3 and asked which they preferred, a speccy or an iPad I think the iPad would win. Many households had one TV and you wouldn't be able to use the speccy all the time. Others had a portable, often black and white.

        So if you showed someone back then a device with email, the web, 3D games, movies and music you can download (back in 1982/1983 it was all tape and vinyl, CD took much longer to become affordable) I think they would be astounded.

        While you could program a spectrum, most people played games on them.

        Any device is about the software, a Windows PC can't do much without installing some software. Same with the iPad. The pre-installed software does the basics, email, web, photo management etc..

    3. KarlTh

      If you were the real early spectrum adopter...

      ...you'd have joined the three month mail order queue, not waiting for it to get to the shops, and had the one with the grey keys.

  66. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    if i worked for microsoft

    if I worked at microsoft - each apple queue event i'd be handing out water and food with big corporate logs's on and sun hats and the like - cheap free marketing at the comeptions expense. Have to love a free world.

    How long into competition queue spam marketing becomes a coined phrase - think about it - static audience with time on there hands and would probably even have a friendly talk with the johovia witness's :). Cheap PR as well to be gained on the back of what is in essence free advertising or news about queue's. Though I suspect somebody in the World has the job title "corporate event queue supervisor".

    1. Mr Brush
      Gates Halo

      They did that...

      at the PS3 launch. Microsoft deck chairs were made available for the queuing fans. They also had a powerboat blatting up and down the Thames with the slogan, "Microsoft welcomes Sony to the next generation. By the way, you're late." on the side.

      1. John 62
        Gates Horns

        nice

        way to alienate potential customers in the queue who deemed to buy a box for blu-ray/games, not a tribal allegiance :)

      2. Rattus Rattus

        re: "They did that..."

        Did they really? Ok, I really don't like Microsoft (or Sony for that matter) but that's just plain hilarious. Good one for Team Microsoft!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      @AC

      If you worked at Microsoft you'd be running W7 launch parties and morris dancer love-ins in various city squares. Given the lack of derision cast at those activities, I'm left to believe people here attended one or more of those, or wanted to attend one but grandma's feet needed scraping that day.

    3. Andus McCoatover

      Butterflies

      "if I worked at microsoft - each apple queue event i'd be handing out water and food with big corporate logs's on"

      Nah. I'd just spray-paint butterflies on the pavement.

      Oops - it's been done.

      http://www.nytimes.com/2002/10/25/nyregion/25DECA.html

  67. armyknife
    Coat

    i

    What a clapped out bunch they look.

    I'll get my coat.

  68. JabrTheHut

    Queue right down now...

    Passed through Oxford Circus an hour ago to check out the iPad - the queue's down to maybe two dozen people.

    Oh, and it looks and handles pretty well, too...

  69. Doug Reed
    Jobs Halo

    Want more

    No Flash, bad WiFi, Battery problems, no camera, costly battery replacement, no proper USB, No changeable memory card, locked into the Jobsian money machine.

    These have to be the folks that regularly get scammed by the lads from Lagos (419)

    For when he has them by the balls and their hearts and minds (v.small) do surely follow.

  70. Bristol Chemist
    Grenade

    iControl

    Apple really should be more careful over who is allowed to buy their products. The thought of some old anorak been allowed to even touch an iPad is enough to put me off. I really hope the powers that be allow Apple to take over ARM so no other manufacturer gets their dirty mitts on what belongs to Stevie Gob by his own decree.....

    Do I qualify for one now, oh lord? I promise I will shave more often and help to stifle innovation.

    What a pile of shite!!

  71. Anonymous Coward
    IT Angle

    Where's the IT angle?

    Seriously, where is it? I just see another article about the iPad.

    It should be noted that Chris Moyles was bleating on about his new iPad on the radio this morning, therefore any chances it had of being regarded as "cool" have now evaporated.

  72. Adam Buckland
    Jobs Halo

    Wandered into PC World this morning

    And they had sold only one by 9:30 so I became the second... No rush no queues. Poss no need

    For one at work..but at home it's great. Lack of flash hasn't been noticed.

    Sent from my iPad

    1. N2 Silver badge

      Thats brave...

      Admitting you actually go to PC Wurld & buying somthing in this forum

      sent from my Mac Pro

  73. proto-robbie
    Pirate

    Collective confusion

    Surely a "job lot" of fanbois?

    Typed on a 2001 iBook, which is actually speeding up as it gets older, in much the same way that my shirts keep shrinking in the wardrobe.

  74. AlexS
    Alert

    ZX80 / ZX81

    In regards to the comments posted earlier,

    In fact the ZX80 and ZX81 keys you had to push quite hard, and your fingers got very tired. Sometimes you would press a key too hard and then your 16K RAM Pack would wobble and crash the damn thing (in the case of the ZX81).

    Still bluetac was always available and playing 3D monster maze was worth it, it was NOT however worth queueing around the block, in fact I think ZX81's were mail order only (at least initially).

    Here endeth the correction.

  75. AlexS

    ZX81 and ZX80 and Spectrum

    NB the ZX80, ZX81 and ZX Spectrum all had membrane keyboards.

    ZX81 had a flexible plastic surface with buttons underneath.

    ZX80 was slightly different (used metal rather than plastic, if my memory serves me correctly - could be wrong).

    ZX Spectrum had rubber keys and much easier to type. If you had used an 80 or an 81 for a long time, typing on one of these keyboards was the height of luxury, at least you thought so until you visited your friends house who had a VIC-20 (and all they had exciting to play on it was "bomber").

  76. Mark 65 Silver badge

    Nice photo

    There's truly some special looking customers in that queue, were the police officers mentioned taking photos?

  77. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Swiss reports..

    Zurich, Friday aftenoon: tame. They had a whole bunch of heavies around, but that turned out to be a nice, sunny day off for those guys. Didn't check the Data Quest store on the other side, though, because what I wanted was not in the official shop, and I knew they had it in Bern, where I needed to be the next day. So, I hit the shop, spent 5 minutes with a member of staff, most of which taken up by waiting for her to check stock - what I wanted wasn't in. No problem whatsoever - what got in the way weren't customers but the heavies :-).

    Bern, Saturday: moderate (not a "proper" Apple shop, but their main distributor, Data Quest). You could still get in and out, and although there was a steady flow of Jobs tampons leaving the store it wasn't overly troublesome, like in Zurich they had all the buyers corralled in one corner of the shop.

    I got my 15" Macbook Pro, which heralds a return to Apple for the first time since I built an Apple II (iPhone doesn't count :-).

  78. Grubby
    Pint

    I would have bought an iPad but...

    I bought a real book for a tenner and spent the £350 I saved getting drunk with my friends.

    Plug a keyboard into your iPad and Google it. :P

  79. Doug Reed
    Jobs Halo

    They look so miserable

    I just noticed when looking at the pictures, they all look so miserable

    They are not smiling, contemplating the second coming of our lord Biggus Jobbus, eagerly anticipating their forthcoming (rather overpriced) tablets

    Well I suppose that I would be if I was buying into the Jobsian world of a product that I can't expand the memory, can't change the battery, can only by apps approved by the great Jobsy. Knowing that something better, with true multitasking, changeable battery, and less of a fire hazard is just around the corner.

    People are trying to kill themselves to make sure that you have a total ownership experience when buying this product. Sweatshops O sweatshops work hard to build this dream machine :)

  80. Anonymous Coward
    Boffin

    Quell the swarm

    The UK Government is passing emergency legislation to allow the immediate and indiscriminate use of water cannons, smoke bombs and tasers when the next iPhone is released.

    We must keep Regent Street open for decent, ordinary consumer folk, and any Android users who've found their way outside.

  81. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    Unemployed

    No Job, Get out of bed there an iPad in it for you's.

    Can even sell it on eBay afterwards -or- exchange for cheap booze.....

  82. Robert Hill
    Jobs Halo

    iQueued

    for the 3G iPhone, bought the first one sold in West London at the O2 store. It was a great fun time, made doubly so that I had nothing else to do as I was debating two job offers and was unemployed. Had a great fun, drunken time with two 20-something biotech grad students, and a drunken Irishman coming back from his grandma's wake carrying his 1.0 iPhone. I lost track of how much we drank or the food we consumed!

    Fun to do once, but never again...

    I just don't get the negative comments here though...it's NOT a computer, it's a personal media device, and the Rolls Royce of them. I would want one if I needed/wanted a personal media device, but I don't - I carry a heavy i7-based laptop anyway when I travel, and at home my main PC is more than adequate for any media viewing. BUT - I can see the appeal...

  83. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    A Retention...

    ... of fanbois

  84. Anonymous Coward
    Jobs Halo

    Prophet

    Apple sales are beyond logic - it's now a religion.

    Acquisition of the latest hugely overpriced, over hyped, under speced Apple gadget is the only way to achieve oneness.

    I would start a "draw an ipad" facebook page, but I fear I would be inviting a fatwa.

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