back to article QinetiQ lends PARIS a helping hand

We’re delighted to announce today that QinetiQ has splendidly agreed to allow the Paper Aircraft Released Into Space (PARIS) team access to its hypobaric chamber, allowing us to test a highly-classified Vulture 1 release mechanism. Those of you who’ve been following PARIS will know that we’ve been scratching our heads quite a …

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  1. Robajob

    And to think...

    the arms trade normally gets such a bad press.

  2. M7S
    Thumb Up

    Space for eight persons

    Have you allocated these or may we nominate suitable individuals?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      Such as...

      I'm sure there are a number of MPs that various members of the electorate would like to see blasted into space,

      Or maybe your favourite game/"reality"/quiz/nonsense-show host? Oh, PLEASE can I nominate 8 members of the East-Enders cast? Oh go-on. PLEEEEEEASE!!!

    2. Samuel Williams

      I don't believe in coincidence

      According to the news last night, that's the same number as are trying to negotiate a deal between the Libs and Tories. The threat of impending loss of consciousness ought to speed things up a bit.

  3. Mike Richards

    So...

    ...which member of the Reg team will be reporting live (well, at least initially) from inside the chamber?

  4. Chris Miller
    Joke

    Sounds fun

    I assume that, as part of the deal, Lewis must have promised to be nice to Qinetiq for at least ... oh, I don't know, a day?

  5. Brutus
    Grenade

    Cool!

    Nice to see that our very own war-boffins read the Reg.

  6. Wommit
    Paris Hilton

    And is

    Paris going to be providing the suction Fnar Fnar.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Pirate

    Pressure

    "a pressure change of 70 kPa in 0.1 second are attainable, which equates to a decompression from 8,000 ft to 65,000 ft"

    That'll make your ears go pop!

  8. darren 6
    Happy

    Use to work there

    Used to work in the chamber - brings back a flood of memories

    1. Anomalous Cowherd Silver badge

      Why did you leave?

      Couldn't handle the pressure?

      Thank you, thank you, I'm here all week.

  9. Dodgy Geezer Silver badge
    Jobs Horns

    I have uncovered your secret!!

    "...we will of course bring you full coverage of the event, in the process revealing our cunning Vulture 1 release plan...."

    That would be the moth-eaten weather balloon with the collection of shoeboxes underneath in the Reg car park, would it? And the pressure switch out of that old washing machine....?

    Steve Jobs because he already holds all patents on the 'iDrop' technology....

  10. Hugh Pumphrey
    Go

    BOFH tool par excellence

    You might want to ensure that the Reg team does not contain a combination of the BOFH and any of his usual targets.

    "If you'll just step this way, sir, I'm sure that you'l agree ..."

    >SLAM<

    >Sssssssllllllllluuuuuuurrrrrrkkkkkkkkk<

  11. Pirate Dave
    Pirate

    I remember that thing...

    I remember seeing that thing in one of the deathmatch levels in Unreal Tournament GOTY. It was sweet. You waited until somebody went in it to get the rocket launcher (or whatever it was), then you ran up and hit the big red button to close the door and watch them get crushed. Good times, good times...

    Only I guess it was a hyPERbaric chamber back then.

  12. David Lurie

    Hold on... I work in Farnborough

    As the title says, I work in Farnborough (for BAE Systems). Any chance of coming along and meeting you chaps?

  13. OffBeatMammal

    you should talk to Red Bull...

    ... and have a look at what they're doing with Stratos - http://RedBullStratos.com :)

  14. Chris Hunt

    While you're in there...

    ...any chance of seeing if a siphon will work?

  15. Wish You Were Here
    Paris Hilton

    A balloon.

    You're going to see at what height a bal|loon pops. Part inflated balloon. Piece of string. Piece of card with a hole. Instant high altitude release mechanism. Simples.

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