Should that be "Britain's GOAT Talent"?
A "gifted" goat elevated to YouTube stardom by a short vid of his ability to greet schoolkids down on the farm will not appear on Britain's Got Talent, despite producers' desperate attempts to lure him before the cameras. Anglo-Nubian goat Darren has sadly "waved goodbye to a chance to become the next Susan Boyle" after …
I hear tales of goats doing *far* more talented things in certain progressive dutch media. Such as finding the G-spot. Hell, if you believe the womens press, most men can't do that. Must be pretty talented then?
As for the PETA/sea kittens - I saw that, then went down the chippy to get myself some rock and chips. Lovely.
No doubt there will be sighs of relief from the next round of muppets lining up for BGT. Those few that actually have sufficient brain cells to make the connection will have realised they won't have to prove they they are more talented than a goat. Probably just as well.
Mind you, it hasn't stopped Piers Morgan.
"finding the G-spot. Hell, if you believe the womens press, most men can't do that"
And if you've followed recent research, it doesn't exist which is why men can't find it. Expecting partners to remember and celebrate certain dates and anniversaries is acceptable, locating that which does not exist is not.
"* The question of what is the maximum acceptable distance for a goat to travel for a "five-minute trick" remains provocatively unanswered."
Shurely a job for the El Reg Standard Measurements team. Now would that be in/absent a vacuum, and impeded/unimpeded by Bulgarian Airbags?
PS, @ Ms. Bee: I'll have you know here in Subo's part of the world (the Loathians) we've always called it Britain's Goat Talent. 's'aw'n the accent, ken?
Two thoughts here:
1. If its "five minutes" as stated by my Mrs when she's "almost ready" and we are due to be somewhere else, then any distance seems to be worth that length of time. Especially if she's not doing the driving
2. If it is a give minute "trick", then I beleive that you need to travel just far enough to ensure you wont be recognised by friends as you hire/ply the necessary trade.
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