I should be paid by their PR department....
I smell bullshit. Let's go through the facts shall we;
Opt-in charges : The website is confusing (and ugly) but it's hardly rocket science to work out. Try reading the screen instead of just clicking wildly you fucktard.
Card fees: AC22:01 says "There is no payment method that is free". Wrong. You just need to open a (free) bank account that has a Visa Electron card - I got mine from Halifax, opened online. No charges when used on Ryanair. This might involve some forward planning on your behalf, but if that's too much trouble, just pony up the extortionate £16/person that Ryanair charge for using credit/debit cards. How can they justify this cost when the card issuers only charge 1.5%? Who cares! They can do what the fuck they like with their business, what's it got to do with you/govt/EU? If you don't want to pay the fee - book with another airline that hides the cost in the ticket price.
The airports are miles away from anywhere: Have you ever flown into "London"? Good luck with getting a taxi from Stanstead.... Look, there are some really bad examples of airports where Ryanair actually fly to the middle of nowhere - Rome, Paris and Stockholm to name just a couple of 60-mile examples, but there are also plenty that are perfectly fine. You could walk to the leaning tower from Pisa airport, for example. Just use the interwebs to research the route (again - this requires some effort from you, sorry about that).
The aircrew are surly and rude : HAHAHAHA! Have you ever flown economy on ANY airline? If you want pleasant, polite and attentive, you'll need to fork out some serious wonga for Business Class or pay through the nose for a "premium" airline like Qatar (best service I've ever had from any airline). I would say that the Ryanair cabinistas are no worse than any other airline's economy staff. Just read the paper/pretend to snooze and ignore them.
Baggage fees/check-in queues: Invest in a bag 22" x 14" x 9" - there are loads of them on the market because this is the maximum size permitted for cabin baggage by aviation law. If you travel more than once a year, you'll see thousands of people with bags that size (usually on little wheels). Unless you're going for 2-weeks, it's plenty big enough. Having it in the cabin means the airline can't lose it and you don't have to wait around in reclaim. If this kind of forward planning is too much trouble for you, then pay the fees. Is simples.
Safety: According to the accident ratings (Google is your friend), Ryanair are the 7th safest airline in Europe and the 18th safest in the world. (United = 32, Virgin = 52, AirFrance = 65). Suggesting anything else is just paranoia or FUD.
They never have any tickets as the cheap price advertised: It's our old friend forward planning again. If you need to fly next week or your days are set in stone then you're screwed. If you book about 3 months in advance and you're flexible on the dates, you'll find cheap tickets no problem.
Compare & contrast my next RyanAir flight to Venice with Mrs. Linbox at the end of October (booked 6-weeks ago) with what I could have spent just to avoid their hateful website and despicably corrupt charges;
2x return flights incl. tax/fees/card charges/optional baggage/etc,etc,etc : £34.80
2x return train tickets actually to venice from the far-flung airport : £17.50
Lap of luxury "flag carrier" to a closer airport incl. no opt-out extras, lovely website and "free" breakfast/coffee: £293.20
Taxi from/to airport to city centre: £20.00
Which leaves a very handy €300 for getting pissed on Valpolicella.