back to article Cameron condemns Tweeters as tw*ts

David Cameron risked alienating the UK's Twitterocracy and the Civil Service alike this morning when he suggested the microblogging service was for "twats". The Tory leader also shocked listeners to slightly rock-ish radio station Absolute Radio by using the phrase "pissed off", demonstrating the sort of plain speaking with …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    I agree with DC.

    Well said that man. You're still a Tory Boy though....

  2. N2 Silver badge

    Tell it how it is David

    How those winter nights must fly by for the millions of sad depraved people who use Twatter, Facefuck & so on.

  3. Andy 97
    Happy

    Nice work my MP

    At least he didn't call them all a bunch of self-important tossers.

    Can't wait to see how they spin out of this one.....

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    But he's right...

    There is so much shit on Twitter and no, twat is not a rude word, my mother (who is in her mid 70s) uses it and always has : its simply another word for twit.

    People are pissed off with politicians and frankly if a politician came to me and said that I could follow his twitter I'd tell him to fuck off.

  5. Chris Pearson
    Stop

    Missign the point

    Seems to me he's not bashing twitter as a whole, and is stating that the government will almost certainly make a mess of it.

    It's is certainly easy to publish something to the world, but then it's quite hard to get it back. And if any tool in the office can tweet as an official any rubbish can be spouted.

    As for the language? About time politicians started talking like normal people.

  6. Chris Morrison
    Happy

    Newfound respect

    Suddenly I have new found respect for Mr Cameron.

    Twiiter users are Twats and too right everyone is pissed off at MP's. Good job.

  7. Version 1.0 Silver badge
    FAIL

    What's the difference between a "tweet" and a "twat" anyway?

    a. "twat" in the US is your arse.

    b. Looks like the entire editorial staff of the Reg is on summer break?

  8. mmiied

    never liked the bloke

    allways seamed to me to be a blair 2.0 but I do agree with him on the subject of twitter

  9. Andy Fraser

    Condemns?

    I think that's a bit strong. The way I heard it he was saying that politicians have to be careful what they say and if they tweet too much they might make a twat of themselves.

  10. Jimmy Floyd
    Thumb Up

    Problem?

    Seems perfectly sensible to me. Twitter isn't much more than a time-wasting exercise in banal non-information. Cameron may or may not appreciate the subtle nuances in those facts but at least he isn't doing a NuLab bandwagon jump. Yet.

    http://www.twatter.com/

  11. Dibbles
    Thumb Up

    Well done that man!

    OK, I may not agree with some of his other views, but surely he should be applauded for his all-too-brief stint of plain-speaking? Of course the problem is that while Twitter has a remarkably low penetration (for something that generates so much press/ tw*ttery), lots of people will be association be outraged...

  12. Martin 19
    Thumb Up

    I approve fully

    of both radio swearing and the unmasking of the true nature of Twitter.

    DC: +100 Martin Points

  13. Craig 12

    Brilliant

    He gets my vote! Twitter is pointless. Maybe entertaining, but pointless. I'd rather any gov we had wasn't wasting time with free online sites trying to convince us their down with the kids.

  14. baldrick
    Flame

    Go Dave!!

    Wholeheartedly agree with big Dave (and that's a rare occurance).

    Could we not campaign for this to be made the proper OED collective term for a group of Twitterati?

    A flock of sheep, a murder of crows, a twat of twitterers

  15. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

    Re: What's the difference between a "tweet" and a "twat" anyway?

    a. I think you're confusing it with 'fanny'.

    b. I wish.

  16. Richard 81
    Alert

    Ooh

    Wait 'till the green ink brigade hear about this one.

    Also, I hope he realises that most will consider twat to be worse than piss, regardless of the time of day.

  17. The Dorset Rambler
    Joke

    Why?

    This might be off topic, and I must be dense, but I have never been able to understand why the limit was set to one hundred and forty charac

  18. Winters

    Hmm

    But they are a bunch of vulgar term for vaginas.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    Just a miss-understanding

    Of course Mr Cameron wasn't swearing or being vulgar, he was simply of the impression that many twitter users resided in the town of Twatt, which as we all know is a small Scottish village a few miles north of Stromness in Orkney...

  20. Chris 67

    Really?

    Doesn't sound like he was slating Twitter, more having a pop at ministers who think that using it will somehow win over an angry* electorate.

    * insert your own swearword here if you're a big rock monster like Dave

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'd still not vote Conservative

    but he speaks the truth. Less time spent tweetin(?) probably means more time working!

    Most who have time to tweet haven't a either a life or a real job.

    (Elephant prodding complete)

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    help me....

    I agree wih a Tory!

  23. EddieD

    Wow...

    I actually agree with Cameron on something. I think that this must be his reaction to the Civil Service announcements that they will use Twitter, which will make just another avenue for misinformation, but this time one that is blessed by the saintly national treasure, St Stephen, the Fryer, so people take it seriously.

  24. Sabine Miehlbradt
    Boffin

    I suppose that's what you call

    tweets for twats.

  25. Big Al
    Thumb Up

    Damn straight

    About time a politician said what he was thinking, instead of spinning out some banal nonsense like those idiots on Tw... Oh. Maybe that's why Labour 2.0 got into it in the first place...

  26. Tom 15

    Pointless

    Twitter is pointless as a social tool but it is very useful as an industry tool. Anything that allows a Developer like me to ask a question along the lines of "Where can I find a tool that does blank?" and get a number of different answers within 5 minutes when Google came up with nothing useful is a useful tool.

  27. Tom_

    Just demonstrating his ignorance

    Like any other form of communication, twitter's usefulness is entirely down to how you use it. He might as well have said email users are twats.

  28. EdwardP
    Flame

    Meh.

    He's still an utter utter wanker, but well played.

  29. Mycho Silver badge

    I think he's complaining about signal to noise

    As was said far more eloquently long ago, the internet's greatest strength is that any idiot can make a website, its greatest weakness is that every idiot has.

    Replace "make a website" with "get on twitter" and it fits.

  30. EddieD
    FAIL

    Oh yeah, I forgot...

    Twat can also be an article of Nun's clothing, ever since Browning made a bit of a cock-up in one of his poems called Pippa Passes...

    Then owls and bats

    Cowls and twats

    Monks and nuns in a cloister's moods

    Adjourn to the oak-stump pantry

    True story....

  31. Jimbo 6
    Black Helicopters

    I believe...

    ... the MIBs must be messing with my mind, requiring me to don some tin-foil cranial protection. There's no other possible explanation for finding myself in total agreement with the leader of the Conservative party.

  32. James Le Cuirot
    Thumb Up

    Twatter

    ...is what I've always called it myself. Spot on, Mr Cameron.

  33. Georgees
    Thumb Up

    Gets my vote!

    Also, It would be fun to work out how many UK twitterererers (Twats?) are actually old enough to vote.

    My bet is less than 20%.

    How many of those will base their voting not one fuel price, the NHS, education, the transport system or the green issue but rather on the fact that he insulted their hobby.

    I'm guessing 1% of that number.

    No harm will come from this.

    And finally, Cameron can't get away with swearing. He's too well spoken.

  34. Jon Wilson
    Coffee/keyboard

    @The Dorset Rambler

    You owe me a new keyboard.

  35. kissingthecarpet
    Megaphone

    Mr. Honest Plain-Speaking

    Really? He used to be PR for Carlton TV of all things(the worst TV station London & perhaps the UK ever had). It cannot be overstated that you really,really cannot trust someone who works or has worked in PR.

    On the subject of twits, how about upper-class twits - they certainly existed a long time before Twitter, and Man of the People Dave is a prime example of one.

  36. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    Meh

    Oh come on, he's saying what a lot of others are thinking except he actually has the balls to say it. Jeez, you get condemned if you appear fake, like Gordo's smile, and you get condemned if you say it how you see it, The Prince Phillip effect.

    Let's face it whatever someone does, some brain dead idiot will always find some fault with it and think that everyone else should have to listen to why.

    Gordo and DC, two sides of a coin.

  37. northern monkey
    Grenade

    Well, it might take many tweets...

    ...to make a twat, but it still takes just one David Cameron (or any other Tory MP, for that matter).

  38. Scott Mitchell
    Go

    A fanny or a twat?

    I'll take either.

    It will take one helluva lot for Cameron to lose the election, I do not think insulting twitter users will affect the outcome one iota!!!

    I hope Cameron wins, because then Scotland will become independent - we remember what the tories did to us.

  39. Jan 13

    Vagina?

    I think you'll find twat's an alternative word for "vulva". I'm not aware of any english word slang or otherwise for "vagina".

    Anyway, most people who use the word "twat" seem to have no idea of its origins and think it's just a synoym of "fool".

  40. geist
    Thumb Down

    Boo

    Before twitter i felt quite out of touch with what my family, who live far away, are doing. Now with twitter it's nice to know my mom just harvested her spring beans and Dads started cycling. Whats the problem? Cameron can go live in a cave.

  41. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    Well he's sort of right

    the majority of twitter traffic is utter drivel and is further proof, if ever it was needed, that humans should pause and put brain into gear before mouthing off / tweeting. The world is drowning in ill-concieved instant commentary, of which this article is a prime example. (the irony of this post is not lost on me btw)

  42. Studley
    Thumb Up

    For that alone, he's got my vote...

    ...although he's probably lost an irrationally-high number of votes from Joe Web 2.0.

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Headmaster

    @Craig 12

    They're down there, with their kids.

    'write it out 100 times before dawn or i'll cut your balls off'

  44. Winkypop Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    A politician who understands twats

    And he should know, he works with enough Tory T**ts.

  45. Jacqui Smith's DVD Collection!
    Alert

    Spoon face

    He makes my skin crawl...

  46. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'll vote for him based on this alone

    Also up here in Scotland "twat" is just a word for idiot, kids use it. (Then again kids use all kinds of language now so I'm not sure where I was going with that one.)

  47. Chris 258

    Will there be complaining masses?

    You can listen to it again on their website, which is excellent because now thousands of people who were not offended, but think they might be offended can go listen and write in letters of complaint to Ofcom!

  48. Chris Pollard
    Thumb Up

    He's not wrong

    Never have I seen such a pointless banal website receive so much press coverage.

  49. blackworx
    Heart

    The Times

    "The Times didn't have to point out what piss means - presumably Times readers know piss when they see it."

    Brilliant - works on SO many levels!

  50. ElNumbre
    FAIL

    Commenturds?

    I have to chuckle at everyone saying that Twitter is a waste of time, on the comments section of ElReg. Because this is really helping further human advancement...

  51. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Twitter has a purpose

    I would have believed that most IT people would have taken the time to analyse the contribution that various communications mediums make to their relative social sectors, even though they might not be of use to themselves individually.

    As our esteemed colleagues in the UK call a bum bag a fanny pack and wear their pants on the outside, any sane person (note that I am not necessarily thus classing myself as being sane, you understand) would hold that the definition of "twat" must stand with the UK definition in this story. This is, that a twat is a fanny and DC has definately been caught with his flies down on this one. Poor guy.

    He has, indeed, alienated a significant portion of not only young but middle aged voters on this subject, me included. Kudos to his having an oppinion, but if he starts spouting off on something that he clearly hasn't got a mental grip of, then he should sign himself up for a Twitter account, if for no other purpose than he can then be labelled a twat.

    Informed opinion is one thing ... blurting out offensively against others based on an un-informed position is ... for the potential next Prime Minister ... a bit of a bullet and foot moment.

    140 characters forces brevity and tightens up the use of the English language in order to get the point across effectively. It is a nice brain exercise and has opened a considerable window for popular people to communicate with their fan base and persuade them to impart information that their fans might not otherwise know.

    Eg. - pennjillette I did my apheresis platelets donation. Well lit, a comfortable chair to read, and my phlebotomist brought me chilled cranberry juice. Deal

    How many of Penn's 1,003,559 followers might now follow his example and become platelet doners?

  52. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Twitter has a purpose

    "As our esteemed colleagues in the UK " - US - I meant the US!!!

  53. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    not so black an white

    Twitter has some uses. Yes it's full of spam and tripe, but in an age where people moan at the Government for hiding everything it's refreshing to see them open up a little and embrace new methods of communication. For once it doesn't require a £5 billion infrastructure investment, so I'm all for it.

    I hated twitter, I never saw the point, now I'm a bit of a convert. A few friends, a couple of news sites, and a couple of humorous tweeters is all I need on my account and it keeps me appraised of what's happening far more efficiently than checking texts, emails and browsing news sites/loading an RSS feed program at lunch. It even sometimes makes me chuckle (especially @realbillbailey).

    If you can look past the dodgy paintwork, the mostly moronic userbase and the spambots, there is a little gem in twitter.

  54. The Fuzzy Wotnot
    Thumb Up

    Oh shut up!

    He said "twits MIGHT make a twat". If you bang on and on about how great it is, then sooner or later saturation point, the system starts to become devalued.

    Didn't seem like he was having a go to me, just stating that you need to be careful not to get carried away by it all! Sensible advice if you ask me.

  55. Greg J Preece

    Isn't this the same man

    That did WebCameron?

    That painful episode might lead some to use phrases involving a pot, a kettle, and a colour.

    But then again, Cameron calling *anyone* a twat makes him a bit of a hypocrite.

  56. Number6

    140 characters

    While I suspect that the Dorset Rambler does know the reason, the 140 character limit is so that it will fit in a single SMS.

    I'm also with DC, he got both points 100%. Someone's going to have to talk to him about this "telling the truth" thing though.

  57. Shakje

    Good job guys

    DC makes one comment, completely irrelevant to his politics and plenty of you say you'll vote for him because of it. Name five DC policies, go on, dare you. His language usage is clearly planned and you've fallen fo it hook, line and sinker. He'll never be one of the people.

  58. citizenx

    Re N2

    Yeah, because its so much worse than leaving comments on news stories!

    FAIL!

  59. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Wanker!

    A great many businesses use Twitter every day, to promote and market their products, deliver important info to their customers, etc. So, David, exactly what message should I take from your comments?

  60. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Out of the ordinary information

    Peoples twits open my eyes to things I might otherwise know nothing about. It also succeeds as an instant communication on a mobile where e-mail has failed.

    To hear facts from Stephen Fry about the things he is filming and more about life as an ever travelling actor ... things I would never find out on the actual show he is filming and spontanious things that would otherwise be lost in the ether.

    So too Penn Jilette - I'd really love to sit down and have a discussion with that guy; well me and 1,003,558 others, so I guess I stand a better chance of hell freezing over. Ah well.

    Robert Llewelyn conveyed well about suffering make up as Kryten in his tweets ... the right word can paint a thousand pictures ... mostly in someones blue period.

    With friends who share those moments of things that happen in their lives that would also get forgotten in the mists of life. It also allows me to tweet from my mobile without needing an Internet connection.

    The output is spontanious and short, so i can dip in and out and learn things without needing to take out half an hour and a cup of coffee to read a magazine article.

    Wonderful medium. Has its place, sure. Takes a bit of getting used to, yes. Suitable for everyone, no.

    Does Cameron have an understanding of this aspect of Twitter communication? I don't think so. I would also argue, given the people that I come across on Twitter, that the number of Twitter users of voting age are more likely to be 80% than 20%.

    Admin - can we have an icon for a foot bullet please?

  61. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    According to B3ta...

    ...one's Twitter is the patch of skin between one's twat and one's shitter.

    Thankyou.

  62. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Well its about damn time

    Twitter is for twats.

    first sensible thing that man has said in a long time.

  63. Billy Whiz
    Happy

    are you sure about that?

    ... "However, the real damage will of course be to Cameron's chances of ever seeing the inside of Number 10, now that's he's pissed off the microblogging elite of the British chattering classes by pointing out they're a bunch of twats." ...

    I think the fact that he's pissed off the microblogging elite of the British chattering classes by pointing out they're a bunch of twats may actually increase his chances of moving into 10 Downing Street considerably. 'Cos lets face those chattering classes would never have voted for him anyway and a lot those who are wavering may well agree with what he said (and the way he said it!)

    And if I remember correctly a "twat" is an adjective for a pregnant goldfish. Seriously, it is.

  64. Dr. Mouse Silver badge

    @ Dibbles

    "... the problem is that while Twitter has a remarkably low penetration ..."

    You owe me a new keyboard!

    All this talk about twats on twitter, and you HAD to mention penetration!

    (TBH Considering the average twitterer, I would say the comment is correct)

  65. James Dunmore
    Go

    @Chris Pearson

    Yeah, he was implying that the government will make a mess of it.

  66. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    @ ElNumbre

    "I have to chuckle at everyone saying that Twitter is a waste of time, on the comments section of ElReg. Because this is really helping further human advancement..."

    Unlike twats, I mean twits, el reg commentards have to pretensions to furthering human advancement.

    Our favourite mode of communication doesn't give us a stiffy.

  67. Dave 30
    Pint

    Oh boy...

    If mumble pants brown has achieved one thing, it's making us forget that people with good sound bites don't necessarily make good prime ministers.

    It is a good sound bite though.

  68. Dave 30
    Dead Vulture

    oh... and

    ...and while I'm commenting, wtf is that headline about? That's possibly less accurate and more inflammatory that the Daily Mail.

  69. frank ly Silver badge
    Stop

    Clarity and Accuracy

    "..a "vulgar synonym for the human vagina"

    What are the synonyms for non-human vaginas? That question had to be asked.

    One possibility would be to use compound words, e.g. cat-twat, horse-twat etc.

  70. Les Matthew

    @Shakje

    "Name five DC policies"

    Err, naming one is hard enough.

  71. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

    Re: @ ElNumbre

    Yes, clearly you lot are all about the advancement of human furthering. And! the humanising of further advancing.

    I think some of you lot have your pretentions to saving the world from itself, no? It's the internet after all. But yes, it's still a far cry from Twitter. Anyway, I think all El Reg commentards and Twitterers should grease up and fight to the death. Not to decide who's furthering human furthersomeness further or anything, just because the world might be a more agreeable place.

    La la!

  72. northern monkey
    FAIL

    @Michelle Knight

    "140 characters forces brevity and tightens up the use of the English language in order to get the point across effectively"

    Or, as happens away from cloud cuckoo land, limiting to 140 characters causes ppl 2 use sch ridic cntrcns of wrds as 2 mk a msg nrly unrdbl.

  73. Tim
    Megaphone

    Michelle

    Dear Lord Michelle, please shut up!

    On second thoughts, don't. I am enjoying the irony of someone who claims to enjoy Twitter because it "forces brevity and tightens up use of the English language" spewing out great gobs of incoherent, non-sequitur infested verbal exudate all over the page.

  74. David Harper 1
    Happy

    All in a tizzy over twats

    The poet Robert Browning famously used "twat" in one of his poems ("Pippa Passes") in the charmingly mistaken notion that it referred to an item of nun's clothing.

    There are also two villages named Twatt, one in Orkney and another in Shetland, which also features the Bridge of Twatt and the Burn of Twatt. I believe a course of antiobiotics is usually recommended for the latter condition.

  75. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Billy Whiz

    Cameron's party was all up for abolishing the minimum wage - http://www.unison.org.uk/news/news_view.asp?did=5346 but pulled it.

    I haven't forgotten the 2007 cry from a number of Conservative MP's wanting to abolish the NHS as it stands and go over to an Americal insurance based system ... and now Obama is trying to achieve an NHS type system in the US. Doh?

    We have a Conservative MP trying to push the motion of banning violent sexually WRITTEN material. http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/07/06/dangerous_writings_endangered/

    And now a leader that is willing to spout off people using a worldwide communication system purely because he doesn't understand it.

    Somehow, I don't think number 10's next incumbant will be a Conservative ... at least with this record I sincerely hope not, or this country could well be facing considerable trouble. How long do the massive wage earning elite of this country think that people will take being trodden on? I don't think we're too far away from a general strike. The unions are starting to make their power felt once more in this age.

    If there IS one thing to be said for Brown, at least he TRIED.

  76. Mark Lockwood Silver badge
    Happy

    @ElNumbre

    ElNumbre, there is a massive difference between Twitter and ElReg comments. Here on the comments page, it's not my time I'm wasting, it's my company's :)

  77. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Tim

    "Dear Lord Michelle, please shut up!"

    Ha! To quote a UK commedy show, "I'm a Lady!" and if you're going to take issue with my arguments, then kindly provide a few of your own.

  78. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @northern monkey

    Yeh, but they'd be using Tw1tr not Twitter.

  79. Tim
    Happy

    @Sarah

    > Anyway, I think all El Reg commentards and Twitterers should grease up and fight to the death. Not

    > to decide who's furthering human furthersomeness further or anything, just because the world might

    > be a more agreeable place.

    Like all guardians, Sarah is growing to despise those who she protects.

  80. Spleen
    Megaphone

    @Shakje

    "Name five DC policies"

    50% tax on anyone who dares to earn more than an MP, 82% tax on people selfish enough to want to pass their pension savings to their children, whacking great subsidies to giant energy companies to encourage them to not produce electricity, the banning of random countryside sports, and the destruction of our self-defence capabilities by offering our armed forces up as a human sacrifice to the speshul relationship.

    There, that's five. Now you may be thinking of complaining that those are all Labour policies, but since Cameron won't be repealing them and has the same mindset that gave birth to them, I fail to see any important difference.

  81. Josco

    A TWAT is a pregnant fish!

    I thought everyone knew that (as well as being another word for female pudenda)

  82. Andy 85
    Go

    well said David

    firstly he was not calling all users of twitter twats he was mearly saying that if you tweet to much you could end up making a twat of yourself, and as for saying things that people are pissed off with MPs he is right,

    VOTE CONSERVATIVE

  83. Lan ser
    Thumb Up

    \o/

    well he just guaranteed himself my vote

  84. Georgees

    @Michelle Knight

    "140 characters forces brevity and tightens up the use of the English language in order to get the point across effectively"

    What a great way to troll people, if a bit obvious.

  85. TeeCee Gold badge

    Could be clever this.

    Given that the Torygraph has been busily reinventing itself as the official spokesrag-cum-free-advert for Tw@ter recently and that this has caused the regular readership to have a collective attack of the vapours, this could just be a good old-fashioned attempt to appeal to his core voters.

    Smart move, considering how much he's pissed 'em off to date.

    Personally I like to think that the word "twat" slipped out 'cos he was talking about Twitter and reads El Reg, as I believe that this is the foremost place where the hideous neologisms "tweeter" and "twitterati" have been handily shortened to "twat" and "twats"..........Dave, are you reading this?

  86. Dai
    FAIL

    He was trying to make a funny...

    ... by using a naughty word for shock value.

    Jonathan Ross has been suspended for less. And he would have at least made his comment (a) funny and (b) coherent as well as sweary.

    I am genuinely scared that this man may be our prime minister soon.

  87. ElFatbob
    FAIL

    re: A fanny or a twat?

    'I hope Cameron wins, because then Scotland will become independent - we remember what the tories did to us.'

    Not a hope. The SNP only got into power because Scots currently despise Labour a little less than the Tories. The reason they've put the referendum off is because they know it would go against them and end up making them look like *twats*.

    Independence for Scotland means some kind of socialist utopian nightmare, run by the Labour boys club. Taxed like f**k with nothing to show for it.

    I hope they do hold a referendum, because then maybe we can resolve this crap once and for all.

  88. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    Bandwagon

    I'm surprised he's slagged it off rather than jumping onto this particular bandwagon. Maybe he's on too many bandwagons already...

  89. Dave Murray
    Thumb Up

    oh noes...

    First David Davis says things I agree with, now David Cameron steals words out of my mouth. I'm going to need a bath in Domestos to get over this Toryness infection.

  90. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Chair to read?

    "pennjillette I did my apheresis platelets donation. Well lit, a comfortable chair to read, and my phlebotomist brought me chilled cranberry juice. Deal"

    I know he's a "magician", but how did he read a chair?

    Another example of how it doesn't matter how many characters you have, the inability to read what you just wrote will always result in garbage.

    /pedant.

  91. MnM
    Badgers

    @Tim

    Thanks for summarising! So it was a load of drivel. I couldn't bear to read on.

  92. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Georgees

    Not really. You choose who you follow. if you choose to follow a troll, however ... well ... perhaps you're wanting them to invite you under their bridge! Who am i to say?

  93. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    FFS

    Who the fuck gets upset, offended or outraged by the use of the words piss or twat.... but DC is still a slimy cun...

  94. Richard North
    Go

    Cameron does have a point though...

    Unlike most of the 'twaterati'

  95. cjmUK
    Grenade

    If I was unsure before...

    ...I'm not now. I shall certainly be voting Tory. Still I'd have preferred it if he had gone the whole nine yards and also proclaimed that MyFace users are a bunch of sad c**ts with too much time on their hands. Because they are.

  96. Tim
    Happy

    @Michelle

    My dear lady, I missed some punctuation out and I beg most humbly your forgiveness for my inadvertant insinuation of nobility. It should have read, "Dear Lord! Michelle, please shut up." Advice which I do urge you to consider.

    Arguments? You haven't made any either. You said, (at great length) "I like twitter." I said, "How ironic, a twit who's incapable of expressing herself concisely." I wasn't engaging in debate, I was being rude.

    It now seems that you might be some form of 'orrible leftie (albeit a poorly informed one), in which case you are frankly beyond the pale. Your sort tend to be joyless harpies who take everything far too seriously and are rarely worth the argument.

    So, to borrow one of David Cameron's new words, p-ss off.

  97. rhydy
    Dead Vulture

    a little context please

    I always enjoy your irreverent observations, however on this occasion I think you have gone a little `daily mail' on us, and failed to report that this comment was in the context of policians as twitterers. The questions he was answering was about his own lack of tweetage, and he said "the thing about politicians is that we do have to think about what we say...". I think it would have been more `El Reg' to pick up on the fact that he was merely saying that he was worried that too many twits could make HIM a twat. Ironically in saying so, it has been picked up the media as a way to make people believe that he is a twat. Ah well, at least there was an IT angle because I am sure that digital mixing system that recorded that interview was running embedded linux ;)

  98. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Quality over quantity

    Sounds to me like he is saying that "tweeting" too often is the problem.

    I agree.

    No problem with reading twitter when people have something interesting to say (Stephen Fry et. al.) But people who twit their bowel movements etc. undoubtedly fall into Cameron's classification.

  99. TeeCee Gold badge
    Grenade

    I take it back - not clever at all.

    DAVE? YOU'RE A TWO-FACED GIT!

    See here: http://www.conservatives.com/

    Note the large box, uppermost on the right which says: "....Or vist our social networking pages"

    Beneath this are the logos for facebook, bebo, myspace and, er, tw@ter.

    Next time Call Me Dave feels like holding forth on the subject of Web 2.0, he could at least read what it says on the subject on his own fucking web page first.

  100. alan 39

    Re Scott Mitchell

    I hope Cameron wins, because then Scotland will become independent - we remember what the tories did to us.

    Good because we remeber what the labour did for us down here. Using the scottish MPs to force through all sorts of shit south of the border and not north. As soon as you have independancy we will be deporting Brown et all.

    PS

    My dad was a miner in scotland in the 80's so I remember too. Dont really have anyone to vote for. Bring back Paddy Ashdown, thats what I say. We need more MP's who were in the force, and not lawyers.

  101. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Mistake

    Some people are saying that this was about the danger of chucking all your civil servants onto Twitter and telling them to start tweeting like morons, while others seem to think it is a slagging-off of all Twitter users. Confusion everywhere! By the way the quote in the article actually said far less than either of those interpretations but in context (I haven't heard or read anything else about this) the former may be what he meant.

    David Cameron has made the grave political mistake of using words in a sentence, instead of just stringing the right trigger words together in no particular order to make people feel good. Before you know it he'll be mentioning terrorists without stressing the fact that he isn't one.

  102. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    @Tim

    ""Dear Lord! Michelle, please shut up." Advice which I do urge you to consider."

    Very funny! But ignores what I posted earlier on, still offers no argument and assumes that I will shut up merely by being told to do so! Wow! Such power of will!

    Oh - humour! I get it. Or do I? So ... in the absence of debate I guess I'll find a nice bridge to hide under until the next time Mr Cameron decides to stir such pasioned debate.

    Mine is the one with the purchase order for the insanity detector in the pocket.

  103. imposter
    Stop

    Anyone see the irony?

    Blair 2.0 slamming web 2.0?

    Also twitter is without doubt full of sel absorbed fools who seek attention and tweet inane pointless crap that is only of marginal interest even to people trying to get into their drawers or seeking simular validation. 140 characters will tell a joke or make a point but while brevity is the essence of wit or some such, if you communicate in 140 characters you either omit a lot, or don't have much to say. Despite this, I disagree with Cameron, and not just because he's a Tony, I mean Tory, I mean same thing.

    That does not mean every user is like that, or that all twitterers are twats. But politicians like to generalise, it's how most forms of bigotry work.

  104. boltar Silver badge
    FAIL

    @Tom15

    "Twitter is pointless as a social tool but it is very useful as an industry tool. Anything that allows a Developer like me to ask a question along the lines of "Where can I find a tool that does blank?""

    Err, I guess you've never heard of usenet news groups then. They've only been around, oh , about 25 years...

  105. Anonymous Coward
    Heart

    @Michelle Knight and Other Sane People

    You are abolsutely correct: twitter does have a purpose. It is a communication channel and it's up to you how you use it. I've just been using it to follow some very rapid devlopment on a very useful security tool.

    I'd also like to note that out of all the people I know it is the ones with the fullest and happiest lives and the most friends who use Facebook and Twitter.

  106. James 55
    Joke

    Spade

    Someone needs to smack him in the face with a spade. And the rest of them.

    Disclaimer:

    Terms;

    I - means me not we, you, or them.

    Intention - means what I plan to do now or in the future

    Future - The opposite of past

    Members - what males stick in tw*ts (If they are lucky)

    Him - ignoramus

    Legal text:

    I am not a twitterer nor do I have any intention to be a twitterererer nor do I have any affiliations with any twitterers nor political parties or their members (see terms). Nor do I actually endorse smacking any of the members with a spade.

  107. twitter_twat
    Paris Hilton

    Umbrage...bah...pah!

    I hope you'll all support my response to this, requiring Mr C to donate a charitable contribution....thankyou in advance. http://www.the-twat.blogspot.com

  108. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    To Be Fair..

    it is true. Twatter is pointless, I love how much time people waste on it.

    http://www.penny-arcade.com/images/2008/20080423.jpg

  109. Hate2Register

    Twitterer? No. Twit or twat. Yes.

    Twitter tweets are not made by twitterers. Twits. Or rather, (as Cameron bravely opines) twats. Twit or twat is SO much easier to say than Twitterer.

    So far, we have avoided setting a term of address for someone who tweets. Cameron has vocalised my thoughts. And who knows, it may just catch on.

  110. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge

    Cabinet Cabal Attack Parameter

    "I am genuinely scared that this man may be our prime minister soon."... By Dai Posted Wednesday 29th July 2009 13:29 GMT

    And the Labour Party hierarchy, both present and recent past, are absolutely terrified because of all thay they have been hiding/abusing/ignoring, Dai.

    And if Dave knows of something novel and tasty which he thinks is being ignored, or is either difficult to fully understand without further proprietary information and/or is always best handled sensitively, then airing even a snippet of it and asking for an Official Disclosurse, will put the Government on the spot to reveal and discuss what they would/should/do know of something novel and tasty for the Future.

    Should he not do so, will he then have to explain when he is in No 10 why it is being ignored ... and the ousted Labour Lot will be leading the clamour too ..... in a reversal of fortunes and roles.

    That must surely make the right present decision, a no-brainer, to expose the shenanigans in labouring, knackered Government circles.

  111. Jacob Reid
    Thumb Up

    Well

    I was probably voting for him before ("Democacy is being allowed to vote for the person you dislike the least" - he may be an idiot, but less of an idiot than Brown or whoever the lib dem leader is this week), but this has increased that chance significantly.

  112. HFoster
    Flame

    What?

    So all it takes is for a shit Tony Blair-clone to bash Twitter, and the Conservatives have your vote? FOR SHAME!

    The country is still reeling from the excesses of the last Tory government. When was the last time your train was on time and clean? (No, this is not about to descend into near-religious fervour a la Mussolini-loving housewives) The fact of the matter is, that party made a horse's arse of this nation, privatising anything that wasn't under sole ownership, and then moaning when the great edifice they'd constructed turned itself to a giant dung heap around us all.

    That cunt (and I mean it sincerely) will never get my vote. Don't get me wrong, all the parties are crooked as a wallet full of nine bob notes, but the Conservatives have a special bunch of hatred reserved for them in my book.

  113. Anonymous Coward
    Boffin

    Maybe "Twat" Means Something Else to Twits?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2y8Sx4B2Sk

  114. frank ly Silver badge
    Stop

    @John Dee re. @Michelle Knight.......etc

    "I'd also like to note that out of all the people I know it is the ones with the fullest and happiest lives and the most friends who use Facebook and Twitter."

    Are you claiming a causal relationship here? If so, which way round does it work? Are those 'and's strict logical operators or do you need a few 'or's and brackets in there?

  115. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Time for a rethink?

    Just had a conversation with a client who wants to set up a twitter account. Why? It turns out that a single tweet by some third party drove a few thousand people to their website which led to sales which led to money.

    In other words:

    1. Tweet

    2. Profit

  116. Richard Cartledge
    Megaphone

    Proof it's for TWATKNACKERS...

    kvanh I heard the Apple Tablet will have a webcam. Lord I hope it's not on the back, like the iPhone's camera. #FakeAppleTabletRumors

    half a minute ago from DestroyTwitter

    headofcontract Twitter Titter Apple Pie Fritter

    half a minute ago from Tumblr

    JamelTWilkins Harry Potter drove a Ferrari to AT&T to buy an Apple iPhone. After he made his purchase, he said #iamblessed! *Sigh* The Trends suck now...

    half a minute ago from web

    keifel @earthXplorer before we start panicking, this info is almost 4 years out of date. #Apple

    less than a minute ago from TweetDeck

    imabilly @kevinmwysocki Does apple also claim that millions of trains are derailed each year by a penny?

    less than a minute ago from digsby

    MrCmonster RT @TUAW: More on Google Voice app ejections: VoiceCentral devs speak out on utter absurdity of Apple's stance http://tr.im/uDg2

    less than a minute ago from TweetDeck

    DavidM2 Solution take iPhone off mrkt?? :-) RT @SeanDonahoe: Apple Fears Jailbroken iPhones Could Kill Phone Networks-InfoWeek http://bit.ly/iWqMK

    1 minute ago from Tweetvisor

    DenisonJack @KatKiet Don't fight the power...it's even a trending topic. Apple apple apple apple. Enjoy the apples, leave the bugs.

    1 minute ago from web

  117. steward
    Pirate

    The Tories seem so backwards in time...

    that I would like to take this opportunity to tell them the shocking news that New York, New Jersey, Maryland, and so forth are no longer colonies of the United Kingdom. If they missed the boat on Twitter, they might have missed that one too!

  118. Tom Maddox Silver badge
    Flame

    Twitter

    Twitter == twat + litter

  119. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    On a point of order

    Some uses of the word tw*t mean or imply some slippage as that caused after or during childbirth hence giving some sense to "he got tw*tted"

  120. Anonymous Coward
    Unhappy

    @John Dee

    >I'd also like to note that out of all the people I know it is the ones with the fullest and happiest lives and the most friends who use Facebook and Twitter.<

    So am I a manically depressed, suicidal, 'Billy no mates' because I don't use Facebook / Twitter or do I not use them because I'm a 'Billy no mates' with suicidal, manic depressive inclinations?

    Please advise so I can decide whether to play in the traffic or on the web

  121. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @frank ly

    "Are you claiming a causal relationship here?"

    My anecdotal offering is as rigorous and worthwhile as the many anecdotal offerings made here that twitter and facebook are for those with no friends. Yes?

    "If so, which way round does it work?"

    Anecdotally, I have observed the causality both ways. People with friends are driven to use social tools (like phones, calendars, conversation, facebook, parties, twitter, smiling, eye contact, hygiene) and people who use social tools make friends.

    Communication causes sociability and sociability causes communication.

    "Are those 'and's strict logical operators or do you need a few 'or's and brackets in there?"

    Is that how you talk at parties?

  122. Steve X

    @Michelle Knight

    > If there IS one thing to be said for Brown, at least he TRIED.

    Now there's an epitaph I wouldn't wish on anyone, even a half-blind Scottish tw*t...

    And what's this about platelet kebabs?

  123. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Vote Early and Often

    He'll get one of my votes for sure just for saying they're cunts even if it is a tad harsh. Twat will always mean cunt and no amount of finding alternative meanings will change this.

    The difference between social website tards and commentards is we don't assume that commenting on the Reg is going to save a nation from an evil dictatorship and overturn a fixed election.

    If you ventured to tabloid news channels like CNN or the BBC you'd have seen the utterly self-absorbed ask if Facebook and other social networking sites could save the people of Iran from tyranny. The very fact these so-called news corporations took this question seriously did nothing but prove how little anyone working for them understands history, politics or that Tron was just a movie and computer programs can't really beat up bad guys.

    It's almost as bad as those people who cut and paste content from newspaper websites into their blogs claiming they're going to replace traditional news media. If you're going to replace traditional media you'll need to do a bit more than use it as your only source of coherent information. Especially when you turn that content into meaningless and out of context drivel because you didn't understand the big words when you tried to make it look like your own work.

    Microblogging is just blogging for the lazy or ADD afflicted. Unfortunately it doesn't have the saving grace of being filled with content stolen from people who knew what they were talking about.

    Bristol Palin's ex uses Facebook and that should tell you all you need to know about the people that use social networking. I was once told that the different between Sarah Palin's mouth and her twat is that not everything that comes out of her twat is retarded. So the fact she now uses Twitter as her mouthpiece should probably serve as a warning to those that are thinking of checking it out.

  124. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    @AC 20:11

    "So am I a manically depressed, suicidal, 'Billy no mates' because I don't use Facebook / Twitter or do I not use them because I'm a 'Billy no mates' with suicidal, manic depressive inclinations?"

    Again, I'm not sure why one would think an attempt to turn an anecdotal remark (offered in response to many other anecdotal remarks, and with no intention beyond being such a counterpoint) into an ill-formed logic problem is a worthy venture. I'm not writing policy or science here, just throwing your (collective) shit back at you, like any good monkey would. It sticks well to your straw man.

    But, yes, if you like, I'll go so far as to say that if you don't use any social tools, then you will most likely become a billy no mates. If you are a billy no mates it's most likely because you don't use social tools. Because, like talking, smiling and washing, facebook is a social tool.

    Feel free to hug some passing cars.

  125. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    @Steve X

    "even a half-blind Scottish tw*t..."

    Careful now, or you're going to have to get in the Top Gear audience with an apology placquard.

    "And what's this about platelet kebabs?"

    Can't hear you dude, I'm just like any good troll, stuck here under my bridge. La, la, la, la, laaaaa!!!

    Paris because what other people say doesn't matter to her, either. Does it?

  126. Smarty Pants
    Grenade

    @HFoster

    'The country is still reeling from the excesses of the last Tory government. When was the last time your train was on time and clean? (No, this is not about to descend into near-religious fervour a la Mussolini-loving housewives) The fact of the matter is, that party made a horse's arse of this nation, privatising anything that wasn't under sole ownership, and then moaning when the great edifice they'd constructed turned itself to a giant dung heap around us all.'

    Were you around then?? the excesses? is that the great pile of loot the givernment left for ZaNuLabor to piss up against the wall on ID cards NHSit and a bunch of other 'initiatives'?

    I am unfortunatley old enough to remember the last Labor Govt. lets check -

    Need IMF to bail out the country - Yup

    Unions demanding more for less - Yup

    Winter of discontent - watch this space

  127. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Deliberate and cringeworthy

    There was nothing spontaneous about Cameron's language, just yet another cynical attempt to get down with the kids. What is frankly scary is how many people have fallen for such a juvenile and manipulative stunt. He has shown that he will say anything to please his current audience, desperately trying to appeal to 'targeted demographics' by chucking in a couple of buzzwords or pretending to understand the internet.

  128. frank ly Silver badge

    @John Dee re.@frank ly

    "My anecdotal offering is as rigorous and worthwhile as the many anecdotal offerings made here that twitter and facebook are for those with no friends. Yes?"

    Yes indeed, but you are obviously a much more serious and intelligent person than many here so I expected a considered response. I got one, thank you.

    "Is that how you talk at parties?"

    I don't get invited to parties.

  129. Dr Patrick J R Harkin

    I am reliably informed by my grammar coach...

    ...a Mr David Lister, that the word "twat" is a verb. One exmple of its use, with which he has kindly provided me, is "Let's get out there and twat it!"

  130. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    He speaks the truth!

    The twats that tweet waste so much time doing it! If the civil service are taking it up, it is their way of making sure they do even less real work than they try to imply they do now. Well done to David Cameron for saying it. Has my vote!

    And why the outcry over the word Twat, It has been in common use for decades and is not even a swear word. It's no worse than saying Brown is Prime Minister. Now that is offensive.

  131. TeeCee Gold badge
    WTF?

    @Michell Knight

    "...an apology placquard"

    What? You mean saying something like: "Je pense que Gordon Brown c'est actuallement un really trop great homme qui understandez l'economic issues tres complex."?*

    *With apologies to the late Kilometers Kingston.

  132. lukewarmdog
    Headmaster

    My kind of PM

    Twitterers never get enraged, it's too many letters to waste on an actually emoting.

  133. Alex Osmond
    Joke

    alan39

    "We need more MP's who were in the force, and not lawyers."

    Vote Jedi?

  134. HFoster

    @Smarty Pants

    I grew up under Thatcher and Major. And if you read the entirety of my post, you'd have seen that I am in no way partisan to any of the political parties - "crooked as a wallet full of nine bob notes," is how I described them. Just because I have an unreserved, unashamed hatred for the Conservatives doesn't mean I am a New Labour fanboi.

  135. 2FishInATank
    Grenade

    Obliga*tory* (HA!) Douglas Adams quote:

    "So, for instance, when in a recent national speech, the Financial Minister of the Royal World Estate of Qualvista actually dared to say that due to one thing and another and the fact that no one had made any food for while and the king seemed to have died and most of the population had been on holiday now for over three years, the economy had now arrived at what he called 'one whole jujuflop situation', everyone was so pleased he felt able to come out and say it that they quite failed to notice that their five thousand year old civilization had just collapsed overnight."

    Kind of apt methinks......

    But it'll take a damn sight more than a couple of vulgarities to get me to vote for that lying tory bastard.

  136. Peter Mc Aulay

    What do you mean, Twitterocracy?

    They rule nothing. And even though I hate to agree with a Tory, he's perfectly correct.

  137. settantta
    Thumb Up

    Spot on....

    Too many twits might make a twat? He's hit the nail right on the head (OTOH, when it comes to Twitter, it only takes one twit to make a twat...)

  138. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Etymology

    According to B3ta... #

    By Anonymous Coward Posted Wednesday 29th July 2009 11:56 GMT

    ...one's Twitter is the patch of skin between one's twat and one's shitter.

    Thankyou.

    I think you'll find that the patch between the playpen and the waste disposal unit is called 'Biffins Bridge'. ...and no, I don't know the etymology.

  139. Mr Young
    Pint

    Newsflash

    Politician says word 'twat'. 4 letters too many?

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