back to article Intel accused of stealing chip virtualization, violating God's law

An American prison inmate has sued Intel for $5 billion, insisting the chip maker's Core 2 Duo chip and its virtualization technology are based on trade secrets pilfered from him by way of Apple supremo Steve Jobs. In court papers recently filed with an Oregon-based US District Court, 43-year-old Matthew Robert Young claims …

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  1. Moss Icely Spaceport
    Thumb Down

    Wrong State facility?

    He shouldn't be in prison.

    Surely this guy needs more specialist care!

  2. Angus
    Joke

    Well..

    I am convinced!

  3. Jeremy
    Thumb Up

    WTF?!

    Seriously...

    Please, please, please! Let this come to trial!

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    So..

    where is the raving loon icon?

    Guess I'll have to go with the black heli.

  5. reader

    Am I too late to buy in?

    AMD stock just went through the roof! (Virtually)

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Loony

    'nuff said.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    AMD V

    So, where did AMD get their virtualization technology from then?

  8. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    LORD GOD OF HOST (Lord Godofost?)

    This lord will certainly help in keeping my hosts hacker-proof and virus-proof.

  9. jake Silver badge

    It's sad, but kinda funny ...

    ... how many inmates turn into bible thumpers. They think that if they pretend to "turn to God" they will be paroled that much sooner. For somewhat obvious reasons, they also try to learn more about the law than the court system ... with predictable results for both.

    This guy has gone one step beyond the norm, and probably needs professional help.

  10. Andy Worth

    Umm

    He argues a convincing case, perhaps he really can give Intel the secrets that will unlock the world.....

    Intel's response was a classic way of them saying "Yeah......whatever...." and putting the phone down.

  11. Flocke Kroes Silver badge

    Just another bored prisoner

    Prisoners have some legal resources intended to help the falsely convicted get an appeal. Some prisoners choose to waste those resources on vanity law suits. Mr Young knows beyond all possible doubt that the accusations are bogus. He is doing this for his own entertainment.

    Well done Mr Metz, you have just given this twerp free publicity and a huge ego boost. Next time you see wild accusations from a bored prisoner, please file them in the bin where they belong.

  12. Allen Leo
    Happy

    Dr Evil

    Im sure a pinky rises to his lips each time he utters $5 Billion!

    Would like to get a look at those schematics..you know...to unlock the chip!

  13. TeeCee Gold badge
    Alert

    So this is what happens.....

    ......when patent trolls stop taking their medication.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Well I'll sue him....

    Because I gave him the crack he was using when he came up with all this...

  15. Bob Gulien
    Happy

    Why is this guy in prison?

    Got too much time on his hands.

  16. Christopher P. Martin
    Go

    Yes! Go for it.

    Nutjob.

  17. Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge
    Go

    I really hope this story ends...

    With Mr inmate, after suffering abuse from all quarters for being a total nutter, finally getting his day in court and appearing from a veil of blue smoke and lightning to produce to the jury the mystical key of Odin which he personally retieved from the underworld halls of Valhalla at great personal risk, and that glows with a feint green light from the single emerald embedded in the keys head. This hallowed key being the only way to turn on his virus and hack proof computer, and therefore in some similarly intangeable way proving that he is, indeed, the creator upon high of these computery things and sending the dark lords of Intel and Apple to the depths of Hades.

    Or something as equally implausable, or Tomb Raider-esque.

    Hope he gets his $5bn.

  18. Dr. Mouse Silver badge

    LOLololol....

    <sarcasm>OK, sounds perfectly credible to me...</sarcasm>

    Lets just assume, for one moment, that he DID come up with a very similar design to the C2D and that all he says is true.

    Then he is a complete MORON for disclosing the idea to a guy like Jobs without filing for a patent first, or at least getting a signed NDA off him. Does this guy have no idea how the world works?!? People lie, people cheat, and people steal. Successfull people do so even more (its why they are successfull).

  19. Paul Murphy
    Paris Hilton

    Too much time and access to books..

    Where to start ...

    How much time/ money will be wasted by this?

    How many others will 'think' of trying something like this - especially if they have nothing better to do during the day?

    IF he gets his $5bn can I have some for helping him to spread his message of sanity, love and tolerance?

    I give up, time for a coffee...

    ttfn

    Oh - PH cos shes got nice (though small) chesticles.

    (FF doesn't recognise chesticles as a word? how bizarre!)

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    This guy is (in)famous.

    Google him up - he's been issuing a whole string of hysterically funny and utterly nutso lawsuits from the cell where he's been spending the last few years.

  21. Kerberos

    One thing...

    He does sound like a total crackpot, but if he can produce the schematics* which are proven authentic** and pre-date intels he may have a case.

    * As with anything CPU design takes years and years of study and toil by large teams of people to produce anything even remotely decent. It's not the sort of stuff you have an 'ah-ha' moment over and then make a chip. Anyway his 'schematics' are probably written in crayon.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Forget the "Loony" Icon

    Just have an "Only in America" icon instead.

    You have to admire a legal system that treats everyone as equal and gives them the right to vent their psychosis through litigation. Are legal fees cheaper than psychiatric care? If so, then we could adopt this kind of therapy over here too. America's easy access to firearms may also help this individual when his case is thrown out; watch out for the headline "Massacre at Intel".

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    loony?

    How do you know his claims are not true?

  24. Simon Painter
    Thumb Up

    this is awesome

    hey, but what if he actually was a Mel Gibson [in conspiracy theory] type guy who knew more than people would believe and had been locked up to hide him from bringing down a large and bent corporation, that would be ace

    I think that America has a duty to bring this to trial (and make sure he's not shived in the prison showers by someone offered an early release by a bent cop) so that the world can let him have his shot at proving it, it could be televised right after oprah

    might take our minds off the more serious things

  25. NB
    Paris Hilton

    Amazing

    is this the same guy that's tried sue just about everyone on the face of the planet and in one filing cited the 12 Tribes of Israel or some similar nonsense?

    Paris, cos I'd get innovative with her anyday.

  26. James

    Long Sentence

    He appealed in 1992 challenging the state court's use of his guilty plea. He is due for release in 2019:

    Offender ID: 6242666

    Offender Name: MATTHEW R YOUNG

    Date of Birth: 07/04/1965

    Age: 43 Custody

    Status: In Custody

    Scheduled Release Date: 10/01/2019

    Location of Offender: SNAKE RIVER CORRECTIONAL INSTI

    Race: Black

    Gender: Male

    Whatever he did it was serious.

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    hard time

    anyone know why he is doing bird in the first place?

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    Call their bluff

    Why doesn't he just send the schematics to AMD? Oh sorry nevermind.

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    @Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse

    filling in for amanfrommars now, are you?

    Why is this jailbird wasting my oxygen?

  30. Adam Foxton
    Thumb Up

    You're all dismissing him as a loony

    But you never know, he might just have figured it all out- or if not the whole processor then he might have figured out some of the key parts or underlying ideas.

    I mean that would be pretty impressive, but certainly not beyond the realms of possibility. Let him fail to get to court then mock him for his bad luck/great imagination, or let it go to court and let him present his evidence. You never know, you might be surprised!

    Equally he could be a loony.

  31. Andy Barber
    Thumb Up

    @ @Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse

    That is just what I thought but <amanfrommars> Normally uses a lot of Capitals in the Middle of the Sentence.

  32. James O'Brien
    Paris Hilton

    I dont know wether to cry or laugh

    For a few reasons:

    One if he really did design something off the face of the earth then he deserves it. But I highly doubt it and would be willing to stake my life that hes a nutjob.

    On the other hand why are people here defending this idiot?

    /confused

  33. Henry Wertz Gold badge

    hacker proof?

    So, I do certainly think his other claims are umm.. suspect. Yeah.

    Hacker and virus proof? Well, if the rest doesn't sound fishy that sure should. Being hacker/virus proof is a matter of application and OS design, not chip design. Of course, if you run any non-x86, most hacks and viruses are x86-specific, but that's not a matter of chip design, it's just market share.

    If you run a hypervisor, run a VM under it with your OS of choice... if your OS gets a virus, it's still going to misbehave VM or not. The hypervisor would likely stay clean, but having a VM pwned rather than a OS on bare metal really isn't an improvement in my opinion. But, either way, virtualization is nothing new for the Core 2.

    Stack smashing protection, address randomization, and so on (to make hacks and viruses more difficult) as implemented in many modern OSes are not Core 2 dependent. However, if an app were just badly designed it can still be pwned no matter how hardened the system is.

    And so on.

  34. This post has been deleted by a moderator

  35. Lukin Brewer
    Alert

    From "Dear Guys" in "The Young Ones Book"

    Dear Vyv,

    This may sound silly but I think I am going mad my courtiers won't obey me any more banana banana even my tailor has started making me stupid white canvas jackets loganberry that you have to wear back to front grateful for any advice.

    Yours Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte I.

    (Broadmoor)

    Dear Bonie Your Highness,

    You are not mad. I suggest you invade Russia this winter.

    Vyvyan Basterd MD

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