back to article Bus-spotting paedo terror bust: Shock CCTV image

Our recent piece on the terrorist paedophile bus-spotter driven off the UK's streets by public and police hostility prompted a certain amount of speculation as to what exactly are your rights when you whip off the lens cap. The answer? You don't have any rights, as this shock CCTV image proves: Our artist's impression of how …

COMMENTS

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Andy....

    ...is that him in the distance waiting to give the omnibus loving pervert a taste of the boot, should the police fail to kick him sufficiently?

  2. Steven Raith
    Thumb Up

    Impressive!

    You've outdone yourselves - A snapshot of turn of the century britain that will surely go down in the annals of history as an example of when state meddling goes too far in all aspects of life.

    However, you forgot the extreme pr0n angle. Next time...

    Steven R

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Clearly a photoshop...

    The shadows on the bus go the opposite way from the shadows of the people.

    Can we not even trust El Reg to provide us with accurate photographs of these important events?

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Welcome - to hell

    This is starting to eat into your work time, isn't it? These Duplo scenes started out as a bit of fun, and now they're extending past your lunchtime into the afternoon. You'll have to employ a full-time Duplo wrangler.

    Also, "omnibologist" or "omnibologist"?

  5. Louise
    Heart

    One Word...

    Genius

  6. John Macintyre

    superb

    Such quality footage proves that one scene can create so many news stories! Love it!

    I'm off for the rest of the week so this is my friday, and you've made it feel more like a friday with your top quality journalism. I salute you!

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I don't get it

    Is Optimus Prime a terrorist? I can't tell. I know, I'll call the department for vague paranoia and let experienced experts tell me what this crap is all about.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    Title, I don't need no steeenkin' title!

    Lester, you've outdone yourself - fantastic...

  9. Fluffykins Silver badge

    And now...................

    The BOFH meets Playmobil

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    not friday?

    i just had to look at the date twice to assure myself and i am now really sad its not weekend yet

    ph cos she doesn't now friday from the rest of the week either

  11. Anthony
    Thumb Down

    What the hell

    is this utter bull crap ??

    i am amazed reg has gievn a page to this embarresment, i know of 4 year olds that could write more truth and sense of this ??

    Hate the fake pictures you keep making from lego to support false stories, and if they are jokes , they are sh1t

    really being put off teh reg lately, you used to be mildly useful and interesting

  12. Tim
    Go

    Its a smorgasbord...

    ... of evidence that we live in the imagination of George Orwell!

  13. Mike Crawshaw
    Black Helicopters

    I want

    Your Job. Being paid to play with PlayMobil??? I KNEW I shoulda stayed in school...

    <---they're hidden behind the buildings, but they're there, waiting to swoop...

  14. Mike Morris
    Happy

    How many?

    Simply marvelous. Lester packed more stories into this one photo than nuts in the Volvo.

    I counted 5 but I'm sure I missed something.

    Cheers,

    Mike

  15. Simon Painter
    Stop

    Photoshopped...

    I call photoshop on this... there are a number of posters on the bus urging people to vote for Gordon MugaBrown, this is simply fantasy because we don't live in one of those posh western countries where they elect their executive officials, we promote people to the job of PM on the basis of time served.

  16. Alan
    Happy

    Must Have A Title

    Trust The Reg to give me a good laugh on a rainy Wednesday

  17. Michael O'Malley

    Fat head

    Such wonderful, up to the minute photo-journalism.

    However, as I am not from the UK, I'm puzzled by the strange photographs of a head on the bus, with the cryptic message "Vote Gordo".

    I know that Gordo means "fat" in Spanish. Who is this fathead, and why would people be asked to vote for him?

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Fantastic!!

    If only the BBC/ITV could fit all the important issues of the day into 1 report it would make for much more interesting viewing!!

    ROFLMAO

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Splendid work

    Playmobil re-enactments for the win.

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    paedo terror bust

    I'm beginning to think you guys at the Reg might be onto the solution for all this moronic legislation (instigated at the behest of the Supreme Soviet in the Houses of Pervs).

    Maybe a constant barrage of ridicule will bring them to their senses,

    (I'm not holding my breath tho).

  21. mike
    Heart

    Who would have guessed...

    that so many *random* events could come together like this!

    I am VERY impressed by your efforts!

    All that's missing now is Forrest, Forrest Gump, and his ability to influence popular culture and be in the middle of such momentous occasions!

  22. David Roberts
    Coat

    You missed out.......

    ....the topless 17 year old.

    Oh, wait, that's only found in my <ahem> adult lego set......

    Mines the one with pockets full of dubious plastic.

  23. StillNoCouch
    Coat

    Is that T5 in the background ?

    ... Yeah, thought so.

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Excellent stuff....

    ....is there a full-time opening available for this type of work? If so, put me down for it.

    Cheers.

  25. breakfast
    Alert

    The statistics involved...

    Remember that these terrible crimes are constantly taking place in every corner of the United Kingdom and it is practically guaranteed that you will be involved in a scenario similar to this at least once a week. Don't have nightmares, do sleep well

  26. Nick Bond

    I love the fact that...

    The "cameras prohibited" sign is positioned just below the CCTV camera...

    Genius!

  27. Mark Summers

    Brilliant

    In future of course, all this will be avoided by using a CERN-generated black hole to suck the perpetrator out of existence.

  28. Scott F. Gunelius
    Thumb Up

    Just discovered your work...

    when will it show up on Cash and Carrion gear? Being a "colonist" I miss some references (Croydon?, but can assume it's like downtown Newark, NJ), but still enjoy them immensely.

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    RE: Clearly a photoshop...

    Of course it is, there is no shark, bridge or helicopter...

  30. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    re. Clearly a photoshop...

    "Can we not even trust El Reg to provide us with accurate photographs of these important events?"

    Of course not; they don't want to be arrested do they?

  31. James

    Meanwhile, elsewhere in Croydon ...

    Irish man with a bag and a puffy anorak is arrested by Croydon fuzz harking back to the good old days when terrorists were terrorists - likely for Croydon

    CCTV camera looking down the top of a passing hottie - unlikely for Croydon - hottie that is rather that innapropriate use of CCTV by slack-jawed operatives

    Student steals traffic cone for bedroom - do they still do that or has this being replaced by installing meth labs?

    Man buys steak knife in local shop - obviously looking to commit a stabbing spree

    Many downloads software to recover images deleted from SD card - traced by IP address and house raided by SWAT team

    Overweight doughnut guzzling (or donut or doughnought) police man gets heart attack from the excitement

    Child takes photograph of another child with a mobile phone and is excluded from school

    Motorist fined from driving at 30.000000001 MPH

    Kate Moss does a line of Coke longer than the Brighton Main Line railway route which passes through Croydon

    The blue plaques for famous Croydon scions - Dame Peggy Ashcroft, Roy Hudd, John Ruskin, Ian Wright, Peter Sarstedt (one piece-bathing suit, Aga Khan, HuH Euh Huh), Francis Rossi, Captain Sensible, Ralph McTell and many others - are stolen, melted down and sold to the Chinese for making batons to beat Olympic protestors

    Croydon burberrylicious SUV driverette puts on her hazard lights and magically makes herself, her fat arse and her bloated machine disappear from blocking traffic

  32. Vaughan Silver badge
    Coat

    Are you sure...

    ...that's not Omnibus Prime in the background?

  33. Charles Tsang
    Black Helicopters

    Get your T-Shirt here!

    Heh, to tie in one more link, you should offer the T-Shirt. or in other words, "How to stop an entire group trip at the airport via inappropriate T-Shirt".

  34. Martyn
    Happy

    Best laugh I've had in ages

    Looking forward to a compilation album in the shops for Christmas!

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    it's obvious now

    well now I see the scene it's obvious the man is a peadophile, just look at that outfit, you can tell a peadophile by his looks you know. And that, that's a peadophile.

    I hope the fuzz nab him, shoot the asbo guy, crush the car with family inside, film kids on there cctv and rush home for a good bit of high speed crash tv with a beer and a hardcore pron mag they nabbed off a couple who have been placed far from society for our and their safety in a pit with all the other perverts!

    It's a great day to be British. Although we need to come up with a way of dealing with that terrorist optimus. His ideas about peace, justice and honour can not be tolerated!

    Thanks Reg for giving me this glimse at how the fuzz are saving us once more!

  36. Scott
    Coat

    Change

    Come on guys get the lego set out next week or proper old school...weebles!!!!

  37. Austin Chamberlain
    Happy

    I know that station ...

    Since I live just across the road. I remember this incident!

    And on a serious note, the next time I see a dodgy Reg staffer taking pictures at the station, I'll shop him to the coppers ...

  38. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    IT Angle

    What's missing...

    ...are big flat-screen panels on the buildings with a talking head vaunting the safety of City 17.

  39. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Vote Gordo

    I'm puzzled by this poster - Voting and Gordon Brown don't naturally go together.

    I assume that the 12 year old terrorists being rounded up for watching videos on their mobiles is coming in the next installment?

  40. Graham Bartlett

    Staffy?

    Did I miss something? I can't spot the Staffy in the pic anywhere.

  41. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    BRILLIANT, BRILLIANT, BRILLIANT!!!

    More evidence that all of the World's problems can be solved with Playmobil... and a few trigger-happy thought-police!

    Nice one Lester - I wish I had your job... :)

  42. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    Can I get this on a TShirt?

    I've got to go abroad soon....

    Also to all who think its Lego? you missed out somewhere! (ps its not Lego Duplo either!)

    And for those from across the pond and others who struggle with language: http://www.adrants.com/images/lego_sorry.gif

  43. Phil

    SD Card?

    That looks like a Canon 400D, in which case it accepts CF not SD.

  44. Dave
    Thumb Up

    @Michael O'Malley

    >I know that Gordo means "fat" in Spanish. Who is this fathead, and why would people be asked to vote for him?

    I know my sarcasm detector has been playing up lately, but nobody was asked to vote for that Fathead, which is a minor contributing factor to why we Brits "love" our Dear Leader so much.

    And my life has got so much better for you pointing out that Gordo means Fat. That is just so... awesomely perfect.

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Yeah, yeah, industrial estate

    "That looks like a Canon 400D, in which case it accepts CF not SD" - it could just as easily be a 450D, which does (and only) accepts SD.

  46. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Staffy?

    It's half-in the pushchair and appears to be humping the child's leg and/or eating her.

  47. Richard Claunch
    Happy

    Brilliant!!!

    I love your "re-enactment" of these multiple stories! However....... I noticed that the dog, which you claim was sharing crisps with the child in the stroller, has a somewhat...er..unusual position.

    Does the new anti-indecent act in the U.K. carry any sort of informer's reward? Dog humping child might be construed as indecent!!!!

    Great stuff guys!!

  48. Josh
    IT Angle

    OMFG

    The best yet!

    Just noticing, all but one of these stories has no IT angle...the one is kind of a stretch. Good stuff regardless...

  49. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Bloody Terrible!

    I mean what the hell is going on in society when 3 cops and multiple bystanders gawk at a soon to be member of the "pick up the soap" club when, in the foreground, you can clearly see a child being mauled by a rabid dog??!!

  50. Jamie
    Linux

    Bloddy Beautiful

    I loved the entire photo but why did you fail to mention the resemblance of the Route Master with posters like those seen 14 years ago.

    I think your photo journalist though should get an award for all these candid shots he manages to get.

  51. Les Matthew
    Thumb Up

    What I find really funny is

    that there are peeps arguing about the imaginary camera.

  52. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    @Anthony

    Get a life son. Get out more and hoist a few with your friends (if you have any other than Rosy).

    'cos she knows how to have a little fun and laugh a little!

  53. Tim Blair
    Unhappy

    sad but true...

    god help you if your Irish, even worse if you've got a chair leg in a carrier bag you've taken to be fixed! or your a Brazilian who's late for work!

    I've been into photography since I was 9 (43 now) and just last week was mobbed by knuckle heads for taking a landscape photo across a park to 2 massive tower cranes. "HIS FOWTO WIN KIDZZZ" after about 10 min's they admitted the nearest kid was 200' away and behind me and invisible to me!

    And I only had 2 shots on my camera of the 2 cranes framed between trees...

  54. CTG
    Heart

    T-shirt! Now!

    I want this on a T-shirt now! Before the Black Hole gobbles us all up.

  55. Phillip Brown

    @Mycho

    "Is Optimus Prime a terrorist?"

    Apparently - http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/06/02/transformers_t_shirt/

  56. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    magic mushroom, baby, magic mushroom

    and a pipe

  57. ted b
    Coat

    Ominous omnibus

    #13

    There is devilry at work.... there is no such thing as a return ticket to Hell

    The Coat.. cos I'm looking for my ticket.

  58. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    @ Anthony

    It's not LEGO!

    If you are going to slag it off, get your facts right.

    They are PlayPeople/Playmobil.

    I can only assume your complete lack of a sense of humour/imagination stems from you being deprived of such wonderous toys as a child.

  59. Jay
    Thumb Up

    Fscking Genius!

    This is the best one yet! I like the mash-up (can I say that here?) of multiple news items into a single coherent image. Genius!

  60. Chris
    Paris Hilton

    @ Anthony

    I can only assume you forgot the "Joke Alert" icon as otherwise that you would make you a really SAD person....

    Paris - 'cos she knows how to have a good laugh

  61. Drew Green

    Classic :)

    Classic :)

  62. cmantito
    Thumb Up

    Best one yet.

    That's the best one of these pics so far ^_^

    The only thing missing is it needs the BOFH in it somewhere doing something. That should be next on the piclist. :)

  63. Jeffrey Nonken Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    ROTFLASTC

    I usually chuckle quietly at these, but this was pure genius. I had to stop halfway through, I was laughing so hard.

    I can't wait for the next one!

  64. ted b
    Boffin

    OMG!! Beeb giving advice on how to commit the perfect crime

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/britain/goodphotos/

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